Another tip for succesful "passing' or "blending in" (with tongue firmly in cheek)

[Leslie Langford]

Ever notice that when you are in a store or other public place where Muzak-style "elevator" music is played in the background, the GG's automatically and subconsciously start to either sing or hum along - especially the middle-aged (and up) ones? In my part of the world, this type of canned music typically consists of either instrumental or vocally-accompanied soft rock hailing from the 50's or 60's.

I happened to be in a grocery store earlier today, and the Roy Orbison/k.d. lang version of "Crying" came on. I counted at least 3 GG's who spontaneously began to sing along silently as I walked past them, lost in their own little world. It was as if they had suddenly turned into Stepford wives, or else the Pied Piper had put them under his spell and they had surrendered their will to him. Bizarre.

So ladies, here's a tip - if you are really serious about passing or blending in, make sure you hum or sing along when this canned music comes on in stores. You'll fit right in - in fact, you'll likely stand out simply by not joining in ;).

[Angela Campbell]

The reason this happens is a very high pitched tone that is inaudible to men, is inserted in the music. It effects the frontal lobe of females and excites the shopping gland. One of the side effects of this is it takes away from some of the cognizant abilities to a small degree allowing the person to kind of get lost in the moment.

If you listen very hard sometimes you can hear the tone when no music is playing. In a few stores there is an audible ding before the signal is reset and begins to transmit.

[Lillyasia]

And I always thought stores pumped out shopping gas...:doh:

[Heather Daniels]

The reason this happens is a very high pitched tone that is inaudible to men, is inserted in the music. It effects the frontal lobe of females and excites the shopping gland. One of the side effects of this is it takes away from some of the cognizant abilities to a small degree allowing the person to kind of get lost in the moment.

If you listen very hard sometimes you can hear the tone when no music is playing. In a few stores there is an audible ding before the signal is reset and begins to transmit.

Excites the shopping gland?

[jenni_xx]

The reason this happens is a very high pitched tone that is inaudible to men...If you listen very hard sometimes you can hear the tone when no music is playing.

Which means then that it's not inaudible to men then.

And what exactly is this shopping gland? What, exactly, is that and where is this "gland" located?

[AllieSF]

Hmmmmm... I already do that so that is one trick I can check off the very long and ever lengthening check list on "How to Blend In".

[Angela Campbell]

Ok so maybe not, but it sounds good.

[Lorileah]

I never thought I would live long enough to hear Def Lepard on Muzak.....

The shopping gland is next to the credit card reflex silly

[kellycan27]

The last time I sang in public someone called the ASPCA and said that somebody was killing a cat!

[jenni_xx]

I never thought I would live long enough to hear Def Lepard on Muzak.....

The shopping gland is next to the credit card reflex silly

lol, ah, that makes sense! Itchy fingers near my purse is no longer my own fault. It's that damn muzak in the background causing it!!!

[rita63]

Sorry leslie but Muzak, the elevator music people went under last year and are no more. The mix of pop you hear now is scientificaly chosen to excite shoppers from somewhere.
The sing along influence is interesting, a century ago befor electic/electronic media people had to make there own music so it was really interactive, the way it should be. If its just a femme thing to sing along was Mitch Miller really trans?
Hey listen thats the Eagles "Welcome to the...."

hugs rita

[Leslie Langford]

The reason this happens is a very high pitched tone that is inaudible to men, is inserted in the music. It effects the frontal lobe of females and excites the shopping gland. One of the side effects of this is it takes away from some of the cognizant abilities to a small degree allowing the person to kind of get lost in the moment.

If you listen very hard sometimes you can hear the tone when no music is playing. In a few stores there is an audible ding before the signal is reset and begins to transmit.

Creepy - but then, again, that wouldn't surprise me one bit. There's a whole field of psychology dedicated purely to what appeals to (and stimulates) shoppers and their buying impulses - whether it's the background music (and the way the tempo is surreptitiously increased to hasten shoppers along as closing time approaches), store colors, layouts, smell, lighting, product placement on shelves, or what appears on the aisle end-caps or near the entrance etc. etc.

Nothing is left to chance in the world of retail, and some companies like Walmart even have mock-up stores that replicate a real store down to the smallest detail, and where they train their personnel in these tactics as well as test out new shopping theories. Ever go to an IKEA store and try to get from point "A" to point "B" directly without having to walk through the entire establishment via their labyrinthine passageways that take you past every display in the store? Can't be done. There's a reason for that...

As for me, I may need to have my "shopping gland" surgically removed some day before I max out all my credit cards from buying all that fun "girly" stuff...:doh: :D

[Beverley Sims]

Sorry leslie but Muzak, the elevator music people went under last year and are no more.

That is sad, I have a couple of tape recorders and 10" reels of tape with Muzak on them the tape was played slowly and lasted 24 hours.
It was distributed by landline from a radio station.
These days music is delivered to dept stores by satellite.
Each chain has it's own service these days with announcements interspersed throughout the day.


Creepy - but then, again, that wouldn't surprise me one bit. There's a whole field of psychology dedicated purely to what appeals to (and stimulates) shoppers and their buying impulses - whether it's the background music (and the way the tempo is surreptitiously increased to hasten shoppers along as closing time approaches), store colors, layouts, smell, lighting, product placement on shelves, or what appears on the aisle end-caps or near the entrance etc. etc.
Ever go to an IKEA store and try to get from point "A" to point "B" directly without having to walk through the entire establishment via their labyrinthine passageways that take you past every display in the store? Can't be done. There's a reason for that...

Laws about fire exits in some cases preclude you having to walk the whole gamut of Ikea.
Just don't buy the meatballs at the moment, they may contain a past Kentucky Derby winner.


I never thought I would live long enough to hear Def Lepard on Muzak.....

The shopping gland is next to the credit card reflex silly

Musak is getting modern.
Where did your medical knowledge come from,
Out of a cornflakes packet?


Which means then that it's not inaudible to men then.

And what exactly is this shopping gland? What, exactly, is that and where is this "gland" located?

I still say it is secret FBI business, unless Maxwell Smart Knows.



I happened to be in a grocery store earlier today, and the Roy Orbison/k.d. lang version of "Crying" came on. I counted at least 3 GG's who spontaneously began to sing along silently as I walked past them, lost in their own little world. It was as if they had suddenly turned into Stepford wives, or else the Pied Piper had put them under his spell and they had surrendered their will to him. Bizarre.

So ladies, here's a tip - if you are really serious about passing or blending in, make sure you hum or sing along when this canned music comes on in stores. You'll fit right in - in fact, you'll likely stand out simply by not joining in ;).

I have done this in drab mode before I was married..A good way to pick up chicks.

[docrobbysherry]

"Roy Orbison"? Where the heck do u shop, Leslie? Here in SoCal the stores seem to either play Xmas music or Rap. I'll have to check the GGs in the stores when the Xmas music starts up again the middle of July. See if they're singing along?

But, I haven't noticed the women mouthing Rap lyrics. Actually, I think many of the guys lip synch the word, "Beeotch", whenever they hear it, tho. Does THAT count?

[Kalista Jameson]

Yeah, I always find myself singing quietly to "Magic" by Olivia Newton-John when it plays in a local store and get pissed when they cut in for a customer service overhead page.

~Kalista

[brandi.tgurl]

lol. omg. i find myself humming or singing to the music in stores all the time. sometimes, i find my self subtly dancing...

[Maria S]

Perhaps they will play "Man I feel like a woman".

Maria

[AmyGaleRT]

I never thought I would live long enough to hear Def Lepard on Muzak.....

I actually heard "Iron Man" played in a supermarket not too long ago. Yes, Black Sabbath.

Previously, in a different supermarket, I heard Cascada being played, and wondered, "When did supermarkets start playing Eurodance?"

- Amy

[Jenny Gurl]

I always believed that a sign you are getting old was when your favorite music finally hit the elevators and department stores. I guess they are up to my generation now, darn it. Def Lepard, AC DC, Metallica, Dire Straits, maybe they will slip a Beatles song in there every now and then so I feel a little young still.

[Kate Simmons]

I always do Leslie. :battingeyelashes::)

[Lisa Gerrie]

I can match Barry White note for note. Probably best not to hum in elevators.

I do like hearing an instrumental Walkin' In A Winter Wonderland when in stores, because I hear the alternate lyrics in my head.

[Angela Campbell]

I actually read an interview of a musician who said you know you have made it when you go into a bar at the Holiday Inn and the bar band is playing your song....I guess the background music in stores is just as good lol.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Leslie, That is a great story it hits home.

[NicoleScott]

...here's a tip - if you are really serious about passing or blending in, make sure you hum or sing along when this canned music comes on in stores. You'll fit right in - in fact, you'll likely stand out simply by not joining in ;).

I often sing along when I hear familiar music, but I prefer to go ..bum bum bum... along with the bass line. I guess this wouldn't be a good idea, huh?

Whatever you do, don't sing along in a falsetto voice. It's a dead givaway. Unless it's a Frankie Valli song: "OhOh Won't You Stay-Ya-Ya Just A Little Bit Closer" That, I can't resist.

[Leslie Langford]

I often sing along when I hear familiar music, but I prefer to go ..bum bum bum... along with the bass line. I guess this wouldn't be a good idea, huh?

Whatever you do, don't sing along in a falsetto voice. It's a dead givaway. Unless it's a Frankie Valli song: "OhOh Won't You Stay-Ya-Ya Just A Little Bit Closer" That, I can't resist.

...or maybe what should be one of our theme songs from that genre: "Big Girls Don't Cry", but this time intentionally sung in a high-pitched falsetto for added impact - especially if the CDer is built like a linebacker ;)

[brandi.tgurl]

I always believed that a sign you are getting old was when your favorite music finally hit the elevators and department stores. I guess they are up to my generation now, darn it. Def Lepard, AC DC, Metallica, Dire Straits, maybe they will slip a Beatles song in there every now and then so I feel a little young still.

On the same note, when did the Cosby Show, Punky Brewster, and Saved by the Bell become appropriate television shows to be aired on Nick @ Nite? :eek:

[Leslie Langford]

I often sing along when I hear familiar music, but I prefer to go ..bum bum bum... along with the bass line. I guess this wouldn't be a good idea, huh?

Whatever you do, don't sing along in a falsetto voice. It's a dead givaway. Unless it's a Frankie Valli song: "OhOh Won't You Stay-Ya-Ya Just A Little Bit Closer" That, I can't resist.

I also wouldn't recommend singing or lip-synching "Walk Like a Man" while in a store. That would be pretty counter-productive for most of us. ;)

[VickysBFF]

The next time I visit Toronto, I want to go to the grocery store that was formerly Maple Leaf Gardens and I'll be humming "The Hockey Song".
(Canadians will get this) :)

[Nicole Erin]

I never thought I would live long enough to hear Def Lepard on Muzak.....


I would assume you were joking if I had not heard alice in chains "no excuses" on the big box store's radio.
Oh my gyod, when that happened, I thought "I remember when Seals and Croft was the music of the stores."
They probably play some of the old rock in stores cause demographically, it is probably middle age folks who shop at places like the grocery, hardware, etc...

With trying to "blend in" and "pass", if you tried to do all the things that GG's supposedly do, you would end up being a caricature of a woman. It would be more exhausting than productive.

[Leslie Langford]

The next time I visit Toronto, I want to go to the grocery store that was formerly Maple Leaf Gardens and I'll be humming "The Hockey Song".
(Canadians will get this) :)

Duly noted, Vicky...;)

Yeah! How about them Leafs? Go Leafs, Go! (or not!). Won the Stanley Cup for the last time in 1967, in the play-offs again after 9 long years, and they are already starting to choke, what with getting their a$$es whupped in the 3rd game (and on home ice as well to add insult to injury). I have a song I'd like to hum, too, but it wouldn't be very lady-like.

So what else is new? Deja Vu all over again...:doh: :sad: