Are you just stupid or just nigh eve

[Annaliese]

This started when I posted, what I wear each day on another forum, and this is the comment made to me there.
Are you just stupid or just niave, to think that your student don’t know you wear make up
or that they have not seen, the out line of you sport bra, or bra straps. That your jeans are girl jeans, and your sweater are girl’s sweater. There point was it should be keep in the closet and that we will never be accepted.

My answer no, not at all, I have had student’s over the year, comment on my make-up, on my long finger nail. One told me once, I like your jeans, VS aren’t they.
My point is if we are ever going to be main stream, we have to be out there.
If we are hid in the closet, then it is dirty and disgusting. It does not have to be big, a little make up, longer finger nails, girl’s sweater.
I am a conservative, you don’t have to be a liberal, to fight for our rights and we don’t have to agree on everything.
If we all make a small step’s, the world will hear us.

Here to all you girl out there making a difference.

I hope this make sense, writing is not my strong point, rather do math.

[Jenniferathome]

Annaliese, I don't see a equality movement any time soon but young folks are much better equipped to deal with cross dressing than we were. If you are ok with it, no need to hide it.

take care. Oh and "nigh eve" does that mean approaching the evening?

[Annaliese]

Math is easier for me than writing.

[Billie Jean]

I like the way you think. I don't feel you're niave its best to just be yourself. Billie Jean

[Jenniferathome]

Math is easier for me than writing.

Just giving you crap. It's what I do! ;-)

[Annaliese]

It is ok, need all the help I can get

[Julogden]

Not naive at all. If we would all do as you are, things would get better a lot faster, IMO.

Carol

[ReineD]

Totally agree with you Annaliese. And some fields/professions/environments lend themselves well to this. Other environments though are more "traditional" (for lack of a better word), such as maybe law (some clients would object), or local politics (some city councilmen might not get enough votes), or even business (the boss may not like his employee to wear girls jeans and nail polish when he calls on customers, to make a sale). Also, some school principals & parents might object to a male teacher doing this, or the police chief if the CDer is a police officer who wants to wear makeup on the job.

So I think that each person needs to decide whether their line of work/environment is suited to live on the edge.

My SO can get away with it, and so can you, apparently. This is good. :)

[Wildaboutheels]

B R A V O for you Annaliese to NOT let the opinions of "clueless people" dictate what clothes you wear/how you choose to present yourself.

So few here seem to realize that the person they see in their own mirror is BY FAR their own biggest enemy. YES, there MIGHT be a few in the RW who will cop an attitude or perhaps try to get in your face for being different. Others might ask questions of us simply because we are dressed differently and they are simply curious. Most may or may not notice or be "sharp enough" not to care. They are sharp enough not to leap to conclusions when they see things they KNOW NOTHING ABOUT.

[xdressed]

I think it's worth pointing out that not everyone would benefit personally from being a bit more open in public, but overall I agree. I think as a group of people we are generally a little bit too in the closet and I'm glad to count myself among those who are getting out there even just a little bit

[Jodi Anne]

You are 100% right in my opinion, I am in almost the same boat as you, I find more & more people are accepting us because we are seen and not hidden, full of shame and staying in the closet. Not that all TG that are in the closet feel shame, they have other reasons for keeping things quiet.

[Alice Torn]

As much as i can understand wanting to do what the self wants, I also see, that for the common good, or things, and others, it can be best to not flaunt what the self wants, for the common good of the company or school, or police force. If it is not causing a storm where you work, fine.

[krisinpink]

Annaliese, Hoo-Ray for you! ...and for all of us! I agree that we've got to be out there a little bit! I too am conservative, however, like you, I wear womens jeans/shoes etc everyday. At work, at the grocery store...all of it!
Occasionally we'll turn a head, or get a comment, or even a second glance, as long as we're carrying ourselves confidently, and in a way that isn't "In Your Face" I think that this behavior can serve only to broaden our acceptance.

I love it when someone will comment "Cute Jeans", or do a double-take & give me a wink or a smile...

-Krissy

[kimdl93]

I have to agree that if we're ever to be more accepted than at present, those of us who can, need to be out there and open. I don't have many illusions about my appearance (note that I admit that I have some illusions - we all dream, right) but I don't want to live my life in the closet. Yes, I'm sure that most of the people who meet me are well aware that I'm BM. And they certainly notice my attire, make up, breast forms and wig. It really hasn't been a problem...once in a while I'll catch a smirk but 90 percent of these encounters begin and end on a positive note.


getting out and being OK with yourself is the movement that will make us increasingly mainstream. So, here's a second to all of you who are getting out and making your world a bit more accepting.

[STACY B]

To answer your question I am Just Stupid ,, An don't care what everyone else says !! Heyyyyy You asked ,,,

[Rachelakld]

Well said, small steps, let people slowly get used to us.
I wish I had a teacher like you - OK I did tap in to a few excellent maths heads, but they didn't wear anything interesting.
Actually, I think I might go back to uni now for some more maths - Thanks for the inspiration Annaliese

[Jamie001]

I believe that we may be more readily accepted in an environment that does not frown upon openly displaying tattoos and peircings. In such an environment, I believe that nail polish, earrings, women's jeans, women's shoes (not high heels) shouldn't be a problem. In more conservative environments where tattoos and piercings are not allowed, you would be pushing your luck.

[ReineD]

I believe that we may be more readily accepted in an environment that does not frown upon openly displaying tattoos and peircings.

What a great observation! And it's true. Here I was trying to think of all the professions in which these things are a no-no. Your way of describing it is much more efficient! :)

[Tracii G]

I think its good to push the "normal" boundaries and wear what you want.
If the items are what is generally womens/girls wear and your a guy who cares seriously?
I wear bangles,girls jeans and a mix of womens and mens tops and I really get very few odd looks and mostly positive looks because one I keep it within the normal everyday range.
Never over the top "hey Look at me" look ever.Just comfy and natural.
I never seem to get a gaggle of onlookers shrieking OMG he is wearing womens clothes.
Went to the grocery tonight in my black wool P coat,girls jeans and top, black tennies.
Behind me in line were 3 very big reneckish guys packing 12 packs of beer under each arm did the say anything? Nope.Did they look disgusted? Nope. Did they care? apparently not.
I do think if more would just go out and mingle with the masses it could be so much more accepted.

[Beverley Sims]

I may be stupid but I am not naive, or is it niave, neive and nigh eve, probably is approaching the evening.

Ok, it is a question and I am not slinging off about spelling.
We are all having difficulty here, and this is an informative forum.

Is it naive? The word that sounds like nigheve?

[stephNE]

I'm not naive, nor stupid (regarding this issue anyway), I just don't really care.
I wear women's jeans often. Last week I was in Taco Bell waiting for my order and a nice young lady came over to me and asked "Did you get your jeans at Dress Barn?" I said "Yes, how did you know". So she turned around pointed at her butt and said I have the same jeans! (same pocket stitching). We both laughed and went on our way.

[deebra]

I applaude your courage and self confidence, so glad you're doing this. Have a ?, a lot of the girl clothes you wear just blends and isn't gender noticed, how about if you loved to wear a soft cup bra with D forms under a clingy sweater, would you wear this in a classrooom and how would this go over????????????????

[NicoleScott]

My point is if we are ever going to be main stream, we have to be out there.
If we are hid in the closet, then it is dirty and disgusting.

I'll join the others in commending you for being "out there", if that's what you choose to do. But to judge closet crossdressing as dirty and disgusting is stupid and naive.

[Cassandra Lynn]

I am in complete agreement Annaliese.

I have been doing the mixed thing for a year or so now: mascara, brows well shaped (and darkened with make-up), sometimes eye liner (depending on where i go), ladies jeans, shoes, earrings and nails etc, etc.

It does get noticed sometimes (i can see their eyes wandering around), but i think when it is presented without fanfare, honestly and by someone who isn't some awful stereotyped caricature from hollywood we do teach society a lesson.

In fact i think i recently taught some folks a thing or 2 about gender and sexual orientation. At a new job in the electronics industry my blending was noticed by a few young gals. I'm fairly sure they first thought me to be gay (you know.....that whole too well groomed to be straight stereotype) and as we worked together over several conversations about our lives and relationships they decided i wasn't.

Not trying to veer off topic with that, but too many people tend to go right to that conclusion.

[Sarah Doepner]

You know, it may be that we need a little more naiveity to go along with the 'out and proud' approach. Rather than a direct, full on confrontation, just bringing some of the crossdressing attributes to the conversation with a "Are you sure this is wrong? Does it really matter all that much?" response would be just as effective. When we are up in someone's face the fight or flight response kicks in and that turns this into a couple of monologues getting louder and louder. The other way invites conversation and thought, or just being ignored. I kind of like the approach that Annaliese is taking.

[Lorileah]

Are you just stupid or just niave, to think that your student don’t know you wear make up
or that they have not seen, the out line of you sport bra, or bra straps. That your jeans are girl jeans, and your sweater are girl’s sweater. There point was it should be keep in the closet and that we will never be accepted.



Not stupid nor naive nor ignorant (as the person who replied to your post is). 100 years ago, women didn't get to vote, they kept at it. 5o years ago interracial marriages were not accepted, now we have a President who is from one. The LGBT community is on the verge of becoming "real" people with all the rights that others have. We will be accepted someday.

[mikiSJ]

Math is easier for me than writing.

What level do you teach at?

(While writing is easier for me than math, I have not managed the dangling preposition!)

[Richelle]

I think its good to push the "normal" boundaries and wear what you want.
If the items are what is generally womens/girls wear and your a guy who cares seriously?


I agree. I am lucky enough to telecommute to work every day. So I get to push the limits of "mens" style almost every day. All my causal paint and shorts or from womens department and a number of my tops are. Add to that to the fact that I wear dangling earrings and nail bright nail polish all the time. I have never had an issue and have even received compliments on my nails and earrings.

Hopefully as more of us go out with mixed styles, the more open mens fashions will become

Richelle

[suzanne]

Bravo, Annaliese! Every time one of us gets out in the world, confidently being themselves without drama, it helps us all by showing others its not a big deal. In terms of acceptance, we are some years behind the gay and lesbian community, but catching up, thanks to people like you.

[sometimes_miss]

Annaliese, in every revolution there will be some on the front lines and others that support them. So while I'm not the one on the battlefield carrying the machine gun, I can support my crossdressing cohorts as best I can. We all have reasons why we are out or not, and we can't belittle people who aren't like us just because we think they should be behaving differently. Me, I was both mentally and physically 'beaten down' for so many years that I simply don't want to fight any more. I don't want to be 'the boy named sue' and go through my entire life with conflicts and potential physical confrontations to secure my rightful place, when I can avoid all that by simply not pushing my feminine feelings and behaviors into other people's faces.
So, I choose the path of least resistance (and that's remaining in the closet). It's all I have energy enough to do anymore.