Donna Joanne
03-28-2013, 09:28 AM
Hello all. Hi, I'm Donna and I'm a transsexual. I know this isn't "Transsexuals Anonymous , but it has taken me 38 years to be able to really say that. I have felt that way since I was 15. I have been Donna all my life...just trapped inside this male body. I have tried to hide my femininity from the world and myself for most of my adult life. I have been "in the closet" all this time, and I can count the people that have known about and known Donna on one hand.
During these years, I have been blessed to have been married to three wonderful women, have six children ( two biological children <the oldest 28 and youngest 11>, three that were gifts of GOD not genetically mine, and one very special niece) and a mostly fulfilling life, aside from trying to be a man with a woman trapped inside me. I have always had more female friends than male, even though I have always presented as 100% male in public. All of my wives have told me I'm the most loving caring and nurturing "man" they have ever known. My second wife, who was bi said the only thing that kept me from being a woman was my penis. Let me say that the only exposure my first two wives had with Donna was limited cross dressing in lingerie and occasional "unsupported borrowing of clothes". My current wife of 14 years has no knowledge of Donna, but I do think she has her suspicions (or I'm just paranoid). Due to some other issues in her life with her blindness, mental health and addictive issues, it is not in her best interests health wise for me to "come out" to her at this time; and after discussing this with mental health care professionals, she may never be able to handle it mentally. At some time in the very near future, I will have to make a hard decision to stay in this relationship, or to once again start over. But I do love her so much, and must say my trans sexuality has not been a factor in both of my past marriages. If I had to put a label on myself and my sexuality, I would say that i'm a trans lesbian. I have no desire to or am sexually attracted to men, and yes, I have tried and confirmed this.
As to my family and my professional life, I have never been happier or more successful, but when I do "come out" and begin my transition in RLE, my career will be over because my profession of the past 10 years and employers are not TS accepting, and it is 100% certainty that I will lose my job. I could return to my former profession, but would lose contact with my family.
I also have a 11 year old daughter that is still at home and due to her mother's condition is very dependent on me. Therefore it will probably be at least another 7 years before I can begin RLE.
When I transform into Donna, it is and has never been a "sexual" thing. I do like to be pretty, go out shopping, have lunch, and just be ME as often as I can. I have a BFF who is a non op fully transitioned MTF TS, who is living with a man. We try to go out together a couple of times a month, and she allows me to store all my wardrobe at her house. She lives far enough away that is "safe" for my closeted life.
I just wanted to let everyone know more about me. Any input is appreciated. I need and want sisters and friends more than anything else. My life isn't perfect by any means, but I'm striving to make the most of everyday I've given. Thanks for reading all my ramblings.
Donna
During these years, I have been blessed to have been married to three wonderful women, have six children ( two biological children <the oldest 28 and youngest 11>, three that were gifts of GOD not genetically mine, and one very special niece) and a mostly fulfilling life, aside from trying to be a man with a woman trapped inside me. I have always had more female friends than male, even though I have always presented as 100% male in public. All of my wives have told me I'm the most loving caring and nurturing "man" they have ever known. My second wife, who was bi said the only thing that kept me from being a woman was my penis. Let me say that the only exposure my first two wives had with Donna was limited cross dressing in lingerie and occasional "unsupported borrowing of clothes". My current wife of 14 years has no knowledge of Donna, but I do think she has her suspicions (or I'm just paranoid). Due to some other issues in her life with her blindness, mental health and addictive issues, it is not in her best interests health wise for me to "come out" to her at this time; and after discussing this with mental health care professionals, she may never be able to handle it mentally. At some time in the very near future, I will have to make a hard decision to stay in this relationship, or to once again start over. But I do love her so much, and must say my trans sexuality has not been a factor in both of my past marriages. If I had to put a label on myself and my sexuality, I would say that i'm a trans lesbian. I have no desire to or am sexually attracted to men, and yes, I have tried and confirmed this.
As to my family and my professional life, I have never been happier or more successful, but when I do "come out" and begin my transition in RLE, my career will be over because my profession of the past 10 years and employers are not TS accepting, and it is 100% certainty that I will lose my job. I could return to my former profession, but would lose contact with my family.
I also have a 11 year old daughter that is still at home and due to her mother's condition is very dependent on me. Therefore it will probably be at least another 7 years before I can begin RLE.
When I transform into Donna, it is and has never been a "sexual" thing. I do like to be pretty, go out shopping, have lunch, and just be ME as often as I can. I have a BFF who is a non op fully transitioned MTF TS, who is living with a man. We try to go out together a couple of times a month, and she allows me to store all my wardrobe at her house. She lives far enough away that is "safe" for my closeted life.
I just wanted to let everyone know more about me. Any input is appreciated. I need and want sisters and friends more than anything else. My life isn't perfect by any means, but I'm striving to make the most of everyday I've given. Thanks for reading all my ramblings.
Donna