Telling my sister?

[eire emma]

Hi everyone, looking for some advice here. I would really love to come out to my sister. We are heading away at the end of the month to Dublin for a weekend, I've shopped with her loads of times before and she knows I love helping her pick out clothes and shoes. I would love to go out there en femme with her and go shopping and hit a club. I know she has a best friend who is gay so I think she's open that way. Just wondering if anyone else here has any advice as to how to do this? Thanks Emma.

[Rogina B]

Call her up,and tell her that you want her to meet a new persona of yours when you go to see her..Keep her in suspense a bit...Then dress and show her.Then invite her out!

[Rianna Humble]

There is a very good thread from some years ago called How to tell your partner (http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?13841-How-to-tell-your-partner). When I needed to tell a family member, I found it very helpful as part of my preparation.

[kimdl93]

As Rihanna suggests, read up and prepare for the conversation. But don't wait for the weekend. Do it beforehand and give her the option of choosing when and how she first sees you.

[boink]

Definitely tell her in advance.

If you have a good relationship with her and she's open-minded then it should be no big deal, but it might take a little bit of time to process. Be ready to answer some questions, but just be open and honest with her and let her know that you would love to share this side of you with her when you go out to Dublin.

[Beverley Sims]

You need to talk with your sister beforehand and get her opinion on your CD'ing.
Just because she knows someone who is gay is no recommendation as the two are very different.
When you establish with her that you are a CD'er and have received a favorable response you can then talk about presentation.
Otherwise it is drab all the way to Dublin.

[Cheryl Ann Owens]

I didn't have to tell my sisters. They probably suspected it all along and then my ex-wife confirmed it! (I'm still bitter over that but oh well.)

Seriously, I don't know if there's a perfect answer here because everyone is different in how they would feel learning something like this. If there's time, you could lead up to the full disclosure by subtle hints to get a feel about her feelings. Then you might go farther with what you say. I was surprised that I had no trouble recently telling a few high school girl friends who have no problem and now call me my fem name.

I found that I got a lot of respect by respecting other's feelings but being downright honest. I think I said when I was ready, "I hope this doesn't bother you and I hope you don't think any less of me, but........." And, "If you don't want to hear anything else or continue to be friends, I will understand. This is not easy for someone like me."

What happened after was beautiful. They've accepted me for who I am and we talk about it. I believe the key was honesty. I'm not giving you direct advice but if my example helps then I'll feel like I helped. Remember, you're on your own to do what you feel you should do. It can be risky. Best wishes for you!

Cheryl Ann

[FelicityMay]

a great way I like to come out to people (I've tried lots of different ways) is to just point out first that you are pretty girly.

you: I don't know if you've noticed, but I'm a pretty feminine guy
them: I guess. why do you say that?
you: I just enjoy girly type things!
them: oh yea? like what?
you: well I really like the way they dress. I'd like to dress like that.

of course you will get mixed responses, but just come out and tell them like you are trusting them with a deep secret! it usually can even bring you closer together

[eire emma]

Thanks everyone Il just have to try and talk to her alone. It's going to be hard,really hard but I'm at the stage where I need to talk to someone and she is the closest to me. Just hope it doesn't ruin things between us. I will try to do it this week.

[sami1952]

i email my younger sister and told i needed to tell her something and send her a picture of me and ask to look at the picture and tell me who she thought was in the picture.now she knows and give me incouragement time to time.

[artofbalance]

I told my sister a few months ago by texting. Told her we were going out and then explained how I was going to dress. At first it sounded like she really disliked the idea, but as of late, she has really seen me and loves the idea of it. Yesterday my loving wife and daughter and I went to a club with her. I was dressed of course. It was the first time she had seen me and was super happy about it. I've been kinda close to my sister over the years, but after this it seems we are talking a bit more. I wish you luck telling your sister. Just plan it out and talk to her.

[eire emma]

Well in the end I just couldn't tell her. I'm here in Dublin and we've been out to the shops but I don't think she's ready or needs this info. So frustrating to walk around the cosmetic counters,seeing the Mac area and stores. Guess Il have to come back on my own soon. Anyway thanks everyone for the advice,just thought id let yall know. Emma.