Gretchen_To_Be
04-12-2013, 06:32 PM
Hi There--warning, long post!
It's been a while since I posted so I thought I would give an update on some developments--one is a little strange, the other wonderful.
As my CD experience progressed, I noticed that for some strange reason I had a powerful desire to see my legs in heels and hose alongside my wife's. I'm not sure why this was important to me, but it was. Many of you may have seen my posts referring to a "Hose & Heel Contest vs My Wife":
http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?188668-Contest-My-Legs-in-Hose-and-Heels-vs.-My-Wife-s&highlight=
The first posts in the thread were with my earliest heel purchases, which my wife knew about, and that I had worn in front / with her. She was OK with shaved legs, heels, and even purchased a silk dressing gown for me, but she drew the line at skirts, dresses, makeup, wig, or anything else. She said they were too "feminine" (which I found strange…like 5" stiletto pumps, sheer pantyhose and a cream colored silk gown with lace trim weren't?) but I didn't want to push it, I was happy. That was shortly after the holidays. Then we had a setback while shopping for her. For Christmas I had given her a nice new wardrobe of beautiful heeled and flat boots, gorgeous BCBG Max Azria leggings and bandage skirts, many tops, and some BCBGeneration, Michael Kors and Chinese Laundry high heels. We were exchanging some of these items where I had gotten the sizes wrong, and naturally wound up getting her quite a few more things. Like most CDs I enjoy shopping for women's clothes with my wife, even if they are not for me, so I was all in, and she was happy. That is, until the end of this spree when I saw a cheap bandage skirt I wanted, and told her so. That went over like lead balloon.
When we got home, we talked about it, and I explained that I really wanted to dress further. I had tried to get her to read more about crossdressing, providing her lots of links including to this forum, but it was all too much, too soon. She hadn't read anything, and then despite my attempts to talk it out, she clammed up and we went into DADT mode. She said it was OK if I wore what I already had once in a while, but that she didn't want to know about or see anything more. A few days later I tried to talk to her again, but that conversation ended with her saying I could do what I wanted but she wanted nothing to do with it. I told her I would purchase some items, and she replied with something like "buy whatever you want, but I don't want to see it".
I took her at her word, and over the next few months began acquiring some nice items. Over the same time, we had a few formal dinner / night out events planned, and she surprised me by conducting "hose checks" routinely--but not in a negative way. These were playful, romantic, teasing hints that she wanted me to wear hose--reaching down my trousers, grabbing my posterior, etc. You see, my coming out and ability to finally express this side of me, albeit partially, led to an explosion of my libido and a dramatic increase in our lovemaking, much to her delight. On the nights we were going out to the formal events, she would say things like "don't wait to the last minute to get dressed, it will take longer than usual because you have to shave your legs", and "what color hose will you wear tonight, we should match". This was fantastic. I could also tell she enjoyed the shaved legs under the covers, so there was hope in my mind to move past the DADT limits.
It was during this time that I discovered the strange twist to my fetishistic CD tendencies. It was not just hose and heels, or hose and heels in front of / with my wife. I now found it powerfully erotic to have the SAME hose and heels as my wife. When I would go out underdressed with her, I would wear the exact same shade of Hanes High Waist Sheers, which is both our favorite style/brand. This was not just at the formal events--my wife loves to wear hose routinely. I make it a point to take her to lunch at least once a week, and she'll frequently wear skirts with boots, a look I love, or jeggings with pumps and hose. She seemed to get a kink out of the fact that we were "matching", and would wink and drop comments during the meal. Progress, I thought.
As my CD interests evolved to want my legs to look just like my wife's, I purchased several pairs of the same heels I had previously purchased for her. But because of our DADT agreement, I was wearing these alone in a hotel room, and hoping for a day when I could wear them with her.
Now the wonderful part. That day arrived yesterday. We are now way beyond DADT. We have a long trip coming up, and she had commented on needing less formal shoes to go with her new jeans (still heels but not the sparkly ones I bought for her for the formal events) and some dresses. She dropped a hint that she liked the style of my black suede platform stilettos but wanted them in different colors. She would never spend money on herself though, so with my newly acquired CD fashion sense I solved her problem on zappos.com the next day.
I hadn't shaved my legs in several weeks due to impending warm weather, which she had noted. But shopping for heels online is like crack cocaine to a crossdresser, so naturally I shaved them that night and dressed alone in my hotel. I had selected 6 pairs of shoes for her, 3 pumps, a heeled wedge espadrille, and 2 pairs of flats. Also 4 dresses. One of the pumps I bought for her was a Diane von Furstenberg in Honey Suede color, which I already had in my size, and was perfect for jeans. I think I got the last 7 1/2 on the planet, lucky. Another was a Kelsey Dagger grey suede pump which I didn't have, and I loved it so much I couldn't resist. I added a size 10 of that one to all her 7 1/2s. I was resolved to test the DADT waters with this gamble, thinking enough time had passed. Maybe she would interpret it as a shameless bribe, but I had to know.
The big box arrived while I was traveling. I told her it was a surprise present for the trip, and not to open it until I got home. During this time, all of my shoes and clothes were stored in a big duffel in the back of my SUV. She'd never seen it, or if she had, never commented. I removed one stretch bandage skirt and a top and put them in my overnight bag prior to arriving home. Later that night, after the kids were in bed, I asked her if she would open the box and give me a fashion show. She surprised me by saying "I know there is something in there for you, too, right?" I smiled, went to take my shower, re-shaved my legs and put on a fresh pair of hose and my silk robe. I handed her the same shade & brand of hose, which she put on in preparation for the modeling session.
She was very pleased with my selections. About halfway through she saw two boxes were the same, looked at the sizes, and said nonchalantly, "this one must be yours". Then it happened, we opened our boxes of the grey suede Kelsey Daggers and both put them on. She laughed, and we mugged a bit in the mirror with our legs together. Then I said casually, "honey, this doesn't look right with the robe, do you mind if I put on a skirt?", and held my breath. I feel myself tensing as I write this, because I had a lump in my throat. Until now this had been beyond her limit. She then said, "you mean you have one here?…well, OK if you want to". Bingo. The result is in the photos below. A scene I had imagined in my mind's eye was real, I was with my wife wearing the same heels and hose. Weird why this was such a fantasy for me, but I was living it and very happy. She could tell, and was happy for me.
After we cleaned up, the rest of the night was a long, long talk. She alternated between dismayed, loving her new stuff (she said playfully, "your bribe worked--if you buy me 6 pairs of shoes to your one, we'll have a happy marriage") and inquisitive. She said she knew I was buying stuff and dressing while away from home, and she was OK with that. She said seeing me in a skirt wasn't so bad. Then I said "you should see me in a dress!". Another shock for her. "You have dresses?". Yes, several I told her. She said she wanted to see.
I went to get my laptop, and prefaced the unveiling with the same 3 things I told her when I came out: 1) I love you and don't want to lose you; 2) I'm not gay, and 3) I don't want to be a woman. Then I showed her photos of my entire wardrobe, my postings on crossdressers.com, and posts/photos of several of you lovely ladies. Finally we were having a real dialogue. She said she might even join the forum. I told her my deepest desire was to share this with her, not to hide it. To be honest and open. She asked how far I wanted to go--out in public? I told her no, that I wanted to work on improving my illusion with her help, and that once in a while we could have our own little fashion shows. She was OK with all of it…and even offered to help me learn makeup. And she said something that made me smile--"you are going to have to work on that gut if you are going to look good in a dress". Of course, she also said "no sex while you are dressed like a woman"--which I immediately agreed to, immensely thankful for this great leap forward. She said she wouldn't find me attractive that way. I get it, and that's no big deal for me.
Today I hauled the duffel up to our room, and while she was getting ready for lunch, I modeled most of my heels for her, including several of our "duplicates". I told her too bad we aren't as lucky as some of the couples on CD.com who are the same size--she could have double the heel collection. Then she said something that made me glow--"later we'll put on the same hose and heels and take some more pictures". Wow. Look for those over the next few days!
This has been an excruciatingly long post, but suffice to say that I am very, very happy this all turned out well. I have the best wife on the planet and love her tremendously.
There is hope to move beyond DADT--keep the faith!
Thanks for your time
Shibumi
It's been a while since I posted so I thought I would give an update on some developments--one is a little strange, the other wonderful.
As my CD experience progressed, I noticed that for some strange reason I had a powerful desire to see my legs in heels and hose alongside my wife's. I'm not sure why this was important to me, but it was. Many of you may have seen my posts referring to a "Hose & Heel Contest vs My Wife":
http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?188668-Contest-My-Legs-in-Hose-and-Heels-vs.-My-Wife-s&highlight=
The first posts in the thread were with my earliest heel purchases, which my wife knew about, and that I had worn in front / with her. She was OK with shaved legs, heels, and even purchased a silk dressing gown for me, but she drew the line at skirts, dresses, makeup, wig, or anything else. She said they were too "feminine" (which I found strange…like 5" stiletto pumps, sheer pantyhose and a cream colored silk gown with lace trim weren't?) but I didn't want to push it, I was happy. That was shortly after the holidays. Then we had a setback while shopping for her. For Christmas I had given her a nice new wardrobe of beautiful heeled and flat boots, gorgeous BCBG Max Azria leggings and bandage skirts, many tops, and some BCBGeneration, Michael Kors and Chinese Laundry high heels. We were exchanging some of these items where I had gotten the sizes wrong, and naturally wound up getting her quite a few more things. Like most CDs I enjoy shopping for women's clothes with my wife, even if they are not for me, so I was all in, and she was happy. That is, until the end of this spree when I saw a cheap bandage skirt I wanted, and told her so. That went over like lead balloon.
When we got home, we talked about it, and I explained that I really wanted to dress further. I had tried to get her to read more about crossdressing, providing her lots of links including to this forum, but it was all too much, too soon. She hadn't read anything, and then despite my attempts to talk it out, she clammed up and we went into DADT mode. She said it was OK if I wore what I already had once in a while, but that she didn't want to know about or see anything more. A few days later I tried to talk to her again, but that conversation ended with her saying I could do what I wanted but she wanted nothing to do with it. I told her I would purchase some items, and she replied with something like "buy whatever you want, but I don't want to see it".
I took her at her word, and over the next few months began acquiring some nice items. Over the same time, we had a few formal dinner / night out events planned, and she surprised me by conducting "hose checks" routinely--but not in a negative way. These were playful, romantic, teasing hints that she wanted me to wear hose--reaching down my trousers, grabbing my posterior, etc. You see, my coming out and ability to finally express this side of me, albeit partially, led to an explosion of my libido and a dramatic increase in our lovemaking, much to her delight. On the nights we were going out to the formal events, she would say things like "don't wait to the last minute to get dressed, it will take longer than usual because you have to shave your legs", and "what color hose will you wear tonight, we should match". This was fantastic. I could also tell she enjoyed the shaved legs under the covers, so there was hope in my mind to move past the DADT limits.
It was during this time that I discovered the strange twist to my fetishistic CD tendencies. It was not just hose and heels, or hose and heels in front of / with my wife. I now found it powerfully erotic to have the SAME hose and heels as my wife. When I would go out underdressed with her, I would wear the exact same shade of Hanes High Waist Sheers, which is both our favorite style/brand. This was not just at the formal events--my wife loves to wear hose routinely. I make it a point to take her to lunch at least once a week, and she'll frequently wear skirts with boots, a look I love, or jeggings with pumps and hose. She seemed to get a kink out of the fact that we were "matching", and would wink and drop comments during the meal. Progress, I thought.
As my CD interests evolved to want my legs to look just like my wife's, I purchased several pairs of the same heels I had previously purchased for her. But because of our DADT agreement, I was wearing these alone in a hotel room, and hoping for a day when I could wear them with her.
Now the wonderful part. That day arrived yesterday. We are now way beyond DADT. We have a long trip coming up, and she had commented on needing less formal shoes to go with her new jeans (still heels but not the sparkly ones I bought for her for the formal events) and some dresses. She dropped a hint that she liked the style of my black suede platform stilettos but wanted them in different colors. She would never spend money on herself though, so with my newly acquired CD fashion sense I solved her problem on zappos.com the next day.
I hadn't shaved my legs in several weeks due to impending warm weather, which she had noted. But shopping for heels online is like crack cocaine to a crossdresser, so naturally I shaved them that night and dressed alone in my hotel. I had selected 6 pairs of shoes for her, 3 pumps, a heeled wedge espadrille, and 2 pairs of flats. Also 4 dresses. One of the pumps I bought for her was a Diane von Furstenberg in Honey Suede color, which I already had in my size, and was perfect for jeans. I think I got the last 7 1/2 on the planet, lucky. Another was a Kelsey Dagger grey suede pump which I didn't have, and I loved it so much I couldn't resist. I added a size 10 of that one to all her 7 1/2s. I was resolved to test the DADT waters with this gamble, thinking enough time had passed. Maybe she would interpret it as a shameless bribe, but I had to know.
The big box arrived while I was traveling. I told her it was a surprise present for the trip, and not to open it until I got home. During this time, all of my shoes and clothes were stored in a big duffel in the back of my SUV. She'd never seen it, or if she had, never commented. I removed one stretch bandage skirt and a top and put them in my overnight bag prior to arriving home. Later that night, after the kids were in bed, I asked her if she would open the box and give me a fashion show. She surprised me by saying "I know there is something in there for you, too, right?" I smiled, went to take my shower, re-shaved my legs and put on a fresh pair of hose and my silk robe. I handed her the same shade & brand of hose, which she put on in preparation for the modeling session.
She was very pleased with my selections. About halfway through she saw two boxes were the same, looked at the sizes, and said nonchalantly, "this one must be yours". Then it happened, we opened our boxes of the grey suede Kelsey Daggers and both put them on. She laughed, and we mugged a bit in the mirror with our legs together. Then I said casually, "honey, this doesn't look right with the robe, do you mind if I put on a skirt?", and held my breath. I feel myself tensing as I write this, because I had a lump in my throat. Until now this had been beyond her limit. She then said, "you mean you have one here?…well, OK if you want to". Bingo. The result is in the photos below. A scene I had imagined in my mind's eye was real, I was with my wife wearing the same heels and hose. Weird why this was such a fantasy for me, but I was living it and very happy. She could tell, and was happy for me.
After we cleaned up, the rest of the night was a long, long talk. She alternated between dismayed, loving her new stuff (she said playfully, "your bribe worked--if you buy me 6 pairs of shoes to your one, we'll have a happy marriage") and inquisitive. She said she knew I was buying stuff and dressing while away from home, and she was OK with that. She said seeing me in a skirt wasn't so bad. Then I said "you should see me in a dress!". Another shock for her. "You have dresses?". Yes, several I told her. She said she wanted to see.
I went to get my laptop, and prefaced the unveiling with the same 3 things I told her when I came out: 1) I love you and don't want to lose you; 2) I'm not gay, and 3) I don't want to be a woman. Then I showed her photos of my entire wardrobe, my postings on crossdressers.com, and posts/photos of several of you lovely ladies. Finally we were having a real dialogue. She said she might even join the forum. I told her my deepest desire was to share this with her, not to hide it. To be honest and open. She asked how far I wanted to go--out in public? I told her no, that I wanted to work on improving my illusion with her help, and that once in a while we could have our own little fashion shows. She was OK with all of it…and even offered to help me learn makeup. And she said something that made me smile--"you are going to have to work on that gut if you are going to look good in a dress". Of course, she also said "no sex while you are dressed like a woman"--which I immediately agreed to, immensely thankful for this great leap forward. She said she wouldn't find me attractive that way. I get it, and that's no big deal for me.
Today I hauled the duffel up to our room, and while she was getting ready for lunch, I modeled most of my heels for her, including several of our "duplicates". I told her too bad we aren't as lucky as some of the couples on CD.com who are the same size--she could have double the heel collection. Then she said something that made me glow--"later we'll put on the same hose and heels and take some more pictures". Wow. Look for those over the next few days!
This has been an excruciatingly long post, but suffice to say that I am very, very happy this all turned out well. I have the best wife on the planet and love her tremendously.
There is hope to move beyond DADT--keep the faith!
Thanks for your time
Shibumi