Finding People on CL. Is it safe?

[leonal123]

I am a virgin and I am looking to meet a guy or t girl online to experiment for the first time. Till now i was just checking Craigslist and i am wondering if those people are sane and disease free.

[Jodi Anne]

short answer NO run from CL very unsafe at many levels. YMMV
Best advice is find a friend who you care for and have a common interest.

[leonal123]

Hi Jodi. Thanks for the advice..What are the other options I have other than CL to find people with common interest?

[I Am Paula]

I've always loved the male for trans ads. Seeking perfectly passable 18 years old pre-op with 38D natural breasts and 10" functional, for no strings sex in my car. Put 'Nissan for sale' in subject line so wife does not read. Looking for 2-nite.

[Jodi Anne]

Hi Leonal, i see you live in Chicago you must have some bars that are kinda what you are looking for.

[Keri L]

Since there is actually someone the media labeled the Craigslist Killer, I'd have to agree there is some risk with that. But, I imagine there are tons of dating sites that would include interests like CDing.

[leonal123]

This might sound stupid but how do you approach people in bar? I've been to bars just a few times that too with friends. Any suggestion or some tips would be great..

[Keri L]

I am way out of practice, seeing as how I have been married for 9 years, but I think honest lines work best--nothing too cheesey. Maybe, "my name is x and I saw you when I walked in and was intrigued. Can I buy you a drink?" then, if they are agreeable, just talk about whatever
comes to mind.

[aalynn88]

So far, I haven't had any problems having guys from Craigs List come over. I do worry that someone may possibly come back and rob me when I'm gone but I do have an alarm and I'm insured. I met one guy on there thats been coming over to play about once a month or so for over a year now. Still, thats not often enough for me! I just hate to get back on there and invite a stranger over but I dont know what else to do. Just play safe.

[mollycd99]

I don't think bars are any safer (or less safe) than Craigslist, and in fact have the downside of not being able to select your partner's specific interests in advance. CL has the advantages of immediacy and proximity and specificity. But there are a lot of creepers there, and a lot of folks just looking for wank material who don't actually want to get together. Having said that, you can find reasonable and safe hook ups, but there are definitely safeguards you'll want to take, like meeting in public first and making sure someone else knows where you're going. And as for disease free? Well, everybody claims they are! But practice safer sex, ALL the time, for your protection. Never ever go without using protection outside of a committed relationship. Someone who's wants to go without condoms is by definition someone who's at very high risk of an STI (sexually transmitted infection).

There are also options like Grindr, which is more for straight up gay folks, not really geared towards kinksters or CDers.

My advice, if you're looking to explore this, would be FetLife. It's a little more BDSM, but there's a decent TG/CD community there, and it is a community, where you can feel people out online a bit before deciding whether an individual is someone you want to meet in real life. Folks there have persistent online identities and connections with other members and they sort of have reputations within the community. You can sort of "check references" before plunging into things.

Also, bear in mind that a "t girl" in reality may be very different that what you see in "*******" porn (also note both those terms can be offensive in the TG community; I'm assuming that you're interested in a pre-OP trans woman, with functional male genitalia). You're far more likely to find a nice, sane crossdressing guy who can give you the experience you are looking for. The effects of estrogen ... Well they change how the body works, if you follow my meaning.

Whatever you wind up doing, remember these two things: be safe, both physically and sexually (I.e. use condoms) and be kind to your partner. There's nothing worse than being dehumanized and treated like a piece of meat. If you do find a nice girl of whatever variety, treat her like a lady. She will appreciate it.

[Jenni Yumiko]

I would avoid CL if I were you. Maybe hang out by the Century mall or bars around there?

[Teddie]

After what happened here in Ohio, 3 murders and 1 all most (Craigslist Murders) (http://www.timesleaderonline.com/page/content.detail/id/545444/Man-found-guilty-in-Craigslist-murders.html?nav=5010). No way is it safe!

[Vickie_CDTV]

If you want a trans partner, instead of the sleaze on craigslist, try getting involved in your local trans community. You can meet folks in a safe social situation and actually get to know someone before you place yourself in a vulnerable position (and if they have been around for a while, you can better gauge if they are safe and sincere or not.)

[rachael.davis]

I am a virgin and I am looking to meet a guy or t girl online to experiment for the first time. Till now i was just checking Craigslist and i am wondering if those people are sane and disease free.

Lets see, are the guys using Craigs list for no comittment sex going to be respectfull of your limits, and treat you like a person?
Think about it a bit more before you walk into someones house, they walk into yours, or you're naked in the back of a van.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Leonal, Be careful what you wish for it's a jungle out there.

[Erica Marie]

My suggestion is to stay away from CL. Too many weirdos and picture collectors. If you are really in need you can try these two sites. URNOTALONE.COM or FETLIFE.COM
Either way play it safe. If you meet some one get to know them first, talk on the phone, meet in a public place and if you will be alone with then let someone else know ahead of time or leave a note at home just in case. U can never be too safe. Good luck with your search. I too am looking for a friend be it cd or gg. But I guess Im doing it the old fashion way. Im waiting for some one compatible to come along by accident.

[melanie206]

From my own experience with various sites, including craigslist, the same level of caution must be used at all times. With that said, placing an ad on craigslist that is clear about what you seek and how you expect people to respond can produce worthwhile results. The vast majority of advertisers and seekers in the "casual encounters" section are of the no strings, quickie type. Ads that suggest a desire for something more substantial are mostly ignored though every ad gets responses from people who seem to not actually read the ads. It's like panning for gold and you shouldn't be disappointed when an ad doesn't do what you want. Establish criteria and don't settle for something fishy because you are horny or lonely. BUT as been said in other responses, the best way to meet others like ourselves is through support groups. Oh, almost forgot, checkout meetup.com for TG/CD groups in your area.
Good luck.

[Beverley Sims]

I would tread very carefully on any meeting/dating sites.
The advice given by others should help make up your mind, if you haven't already.
You may meet up with others locally if you keep asking.
Get into a group friendship first. You can single someone out later.

[MsJanessa]

My suggestion is to stay away from CL. Too many weirdos and picture collectors. If you are really in need you can try these two sites. URNOTALONE.COM or FETLIFE.COM
Either way play it safe. If you meet some one get to know them first, talk on the phone, meet in a public place and if you will be alone with then let someone else know ahead of time or leave a note at home just in case. U can never be too safe. Good luck with your search. I too am looking for a friend be it cd or gg. But I guess Im doing it the old fashion way. Im waiting for some one compatible to come along by accident.

Ditto--another one is ALT.COM--craigs list seems to attract some violent types--although I'm sure that there are plenty of nice people there too,

[Elsa Larson]

Check out the movie Craigslist Joe on Netflix.

It's NOT about connecting for sex but IS about using CL to meet nice everyday people.

[rachael.davis]

add on google "Transgender Day of Rememberance", and think about the fact that you are surrendering "male privledge" in many encounters.

[darla_g]

You know based on the many responses here you would think Craigslist is absolutely DEADLY. I have bought and sold stuff on Craigslist with no problems and met some nice people along the way. That being said I wouldn't go near the personals side of things .....EVER.

Let's make that distinction.