Braving the elements

[Samantha45]

I've recently decided that I will fully embrace my femininity, even if it means changes to come in terms of living with my wife, changing jobs or what have you. I've grown tired of living in a closet, and not being true to myself. My wife does not support my dressing, and it's become clear to me that while we may still love each other, there are issues that we won't be able to avoid any longer.

Today, I went out shopping as Samantha for the first time. Sure, I've bought clothes, make up and other things while in drab, but this was a first for me. I enjoyed it immensely, and look forward to another such trip soon.

I feel compelled to "live it out", even if there are consequences. Life is yours, not other peoples'.

Time to "man up" an face this thing for good....wish me luck!

[ArleneRaquel]

Samantha,
Best wishes, I hope that the best is yet to come. Hugs & Kisses !

[Leah3723]

Good luck to you and what a great out look you have. I'm desperate to go out en femme. My wife and I are looking into it but wow I'm scared.

Very good luck to you and well done

Leah x

[Samantha45]

Thank you ArleneRaquel! I always loved the name Raquel...maybe the association with the actress (who was always stunning)!
It won't be easy, but anything worthwhile in life rarely is.

It was a bit scary, but I just went for it. Sure, I can't pass for female, but it's a big world and we're certainly not alone!

[ArleneRaquel]

Samantha,
I did, in part, name after the fabulous Raquel Welch, who btw was born in Chicago, as I was also. THE RAQUEL, MsWelch is older than moi, though she looks much younger than me...alas. HUGZ!

[Samantha45]

Hugs to you as well...looks are only part of the appeal. It's just fun, and who doesn't want to have fun?!

[ArleneRaquel]

Samantha,
Thank you for the hug, you can hug me anytime, anywhere. :o:battingeyelashes:

[Samantha45]

:o As George Takei might say, "oh my...." Lol! Thanks for the :battingeyelashes: AreleneRaquel!

[Beverley Sims]

Samantha,
I do wish you luck but do be a little discreet.
Or is that asking too much?

[Samantha45]

Well, I was careful...but I could do better next time.

Samantha,
I do wish you luck but do be a little discreet.
Or is that asking too much?

Just an update. I laid it out as best that I could to my wife. She's known about it for some time, but has had some adjusting to do. That said, the talk today was good. We set some ground rules and it seems there's more of an understanding.

It's going to take time and we'll see how it all goes...

[Jaylyn]

way to go Samantha but try and keep your wife also,,, its god if you cn et her on board...

[GaleWarning]

Well, I'm pleased to note that you have shown your wife some respect. Whether or not it will be sufficient, time will tell.

[kimdl93]

I'm supportive of the desire to more openly express yourself, but a bit troubled by what seemed willingness to dismiss a long term relationship and job in such a seemingly cavalier manner. You are apparently very early in the process of learning who you are. What's the rush?

It's good that you took the opportunity to talk with your wife...laud it out, as you said. Now, I'd advise you to listen. The ground rules are a great starting point...allowing your self expression and giving her a some measure of control. Over time these rules can and will change. Be patient.

[Samantha45]

Well, I'm pleased to note that you have shown your wife some respect. Whether or not it will be sufficient, time will tell.

We've had this conversation before, in the past. It didn't go very well. I understood her feelings and did not dress in front of her very often. I cannot, however, be expected to deny who I am indefinitely...I was made this way, and I have tried to change many times in many ways...but the desire remained and no matter what I did, nothing really worked out. I realized a while ago that this isn't optional for me. So the decision was to embrace it.
That said, I am taking things slow...we have a daughter together and discussed how and when to bring this forward. She's four now, and probably will need time to adjust, so the introduction will be gradual.


I'm supportive of the desire to more openly express yourself, but a bit troubled by what seemed willingness to dismiss a long term relationship and job in such a seemingly cavalier manner. You are apparently very early in the process of learning who you are. What's the rush?

It's good that you took the opportunity to talk with your wife...laud it out, as you said. Now, I'd advise you to listen. The ground rules are a great starting point...allowing your self expression and giving her a some measure of control. Over time these rules can and will change. Be patient.

Thanks for your response. I've been this way for a long time and fought it because I thought that I wanted a regular life. In some ways, I do, but it's clear that arguing with myself over what I'm supposed to be to "fit in" is a waste of time. So, I wouldn't say that I'm learning who I am, but finally embracing who I am fully.

We're trying to reach a middle ground that works for both of us, and that's been the issue since the first time I brought this up. It's been several years now that she's known, and it's like we're revisiting the issue in light of some sense of the "ticking clock" (I'm 45)...so if it seemed I was cavalier about it, it's because I felt the need to revisit the issue with her and resolve it if we could.

[Iwasconfusedonce]

I honestly know how you feel, to.a degree of course. I'm only 29 but I finally told my wife the truth and I'm hoping that she will embrace me. I literally put off dressing for years even though I always day dreamed about it. Im hoping you the best. Keep us informed. No-one should have to hide.

[Tara D. Rose]

Well good for you Samantha, I hope all goes well for you as the months roll on ans turn into years. And I hope all will go well with you and your wife by way of all of this. And wow, out shopping en fem as Samantha as a first time, how did it go, did everything roll along smoothly for you?
I really do hope so. I've only shopped once as Tara, but it was at the mall across the road from the annual SCC event. And I do agree with you that our life is our life and no one else's.

[Samantha45]

Well good for you Samantha, I hope all goes well for you as the months roll on ans turn into years. And I hope all will go well with you and your wife by way of all of this. And wow, out shopping en fem as Samantha as a first time, how did it go, did everything roll along smoothly for you?
I really do hope so. I've only shopped once as Tara, but it was at the mall across the road from the annual SCC event. And I do agree with you that our life is our life and no one else's.

It went okay. The occasional odd look but otherwise I felt good about it, and I look forward to doing so in daytime again. I have since tried to find a local drag night that I could attend but there was nothing going on on Sunday. Still, I got out all "gussied up" for the occasion and enjoyed being out in public. I even got a "wicked shoes" comment from a woman while I walked. It was fun, despite the lack of activity.

Thanks for the great comments! Good luck and I hope you get to go out shopping (and other fun girlie stuff) soon!
Sammy


I honestly know how you feel, to.a degree of course. I'm only 29 but I finally told my wife the truth and I'm hoping that she will embrace me. I literally put off dressing for years even though I always day dreamed about it. Im hoping you the best. Keep us informed. No-one should have to hide.

I agree that we should be able to be open about it. I hope that every girl here finds a place where they can be true to themselves. I hope that your wife accepts you and you can be happy together. My wife and I are doing okay, and there is some adjustment, but I am being patient with her and myself. I have some weight to lose and I need to work on all kinds of skills that I can develop, but it's a process so I get that. I'm enjoying being "out" and not hiding from her...this has been quite liberating!
I hope the same for you.
Luv, Sammy