ErinP
05-09-2013, 10:19 PM
At eight years old you just know these clothes feel good. At sixteen you are wondering why me? In your twenties you know it just has to be this way and you can't experiment enough. But still wonder, why me? In your thirties you know enough about yourself to start really understanding who you really are. It was at this time I found the support groups and the fun nights out. Leading to that pivotal moment when you know the girl inside will most certainly expresses herself. And conclude that you are not going all the way to womanhood. But that the bra just feels like a part of you. In the end you simply except the fact that you are both male and female and you love yourself.
When you get married to your high school sweetheart at twenty-two you don't know enough about yourself to throw it out there. The Internet has not come of age and you're still alone with your feelings. But within seven years you roll the dice. And you come out a winner. She accepts and even contributes. You enter your thirties at full stride and with pride. Then, for reasons of life, a divorce comes around. Its been seventeen years. You end up in a new city, living across the street from the same nightspot that hosts the group meetings you have been going to. This seems like the perfect dream.
But, after all the years of being in a partnership, even all of this freedom cannot compensate for loneliness. It's hard to be single when you have always had someone to share life with. You end up going out more than you should and blowing a ton of money on two closets full of clothes. And none of it helps. Well, maybe the shoes a little.
Then you come home from work on the first valentines day after. You decide to not even change and go to the "regular" bar downstairs. And something special happens. You meet someone that seems too good to be true. So good that during your second conversation you tell her about the woman that shares your soul. To your surprise she calls you the next day. And just months later you are invited to move in with her. One catch, she has had to take her mom in. You make the decision to put a huge part of yourself in storage. Literally!
And now, mom is on her own.
I have been in storage so long that I'm not sure how to proceed. Honestly, I have not missed all the extra maintenance. (I have horrible body hair that has always held me back. But twenty years of shaving and waxing has helped keep my legs with very thin hair. My little plus. ;) ) The inner girl has never left my side, so to speak. Just like I giggle at folks who have to drive a certain car to compensate for their low self esteem, I don't have to dress pretty to be who I am. But damn it! I'm just so beautiful when I'm in a cute skirt!
So.......
When you get married to your high school sweetheart at twenty-two you don't know enough about yourself to throw it out there. The Internet has not come of age and you're still alone with your feelings. But within seven years you roll the dice. And you come out a winner. She accepts and even contributes. You enter your thirties at full stride and with pride. Then, for reasons of life, a divorce comes around. Its been seventeen years. You end up in a new city, living across the street from the same nightspot that hosts the group meetings you have been going to. This seems like the perfect dream.
But, after all the years of being in a partnership, even all of this freedom cannot compensate for loneliness. It's hard to be single when you have always had someone to share life with. You end up going out more than you should and blowing a ton of money on two closets full of clothes. And none of it helps. Well, maybe the shoes a little.
Then you come home from work on the first valentines day after. You decide to not even change and go to the "regular" bar downstairs. And something special happens. You meet someone that seems too good to be true. So good that during your second conversation you tell her about the woman that shares your soul. To your surprise she calls you the next day. And just months later you are invited to move in with her. One catch, she has had to take her mom in. You make the decision to put a huge part of yourself in storage. Literally!
And now, mom is on her own.
I have been in storage so long that I'm not sure how to proceed. Honestly, I have not missed all the extra maintenance. (I have horrible body hair that has always held me back. But twenty years of shaving and waxing has helped keep my legs with very thin hair. My little plus. ;) ) The inner girl has never left my side, so to speak. Just like I giggle at folks who have to drive a certain car to compensate for their low self esteem, I don't have to dress pretty to be who I am. But damn it! I'm just so beautiful when I'm in a cute skirt!
So.......