Confused

[Artistheart]

My girlfriend who goes shopping with me and we buy lingerie together is now questioning why I dress. Of all people that I know I thought she would be the understanding one, now I don't know what to think.

[Kelly DeWinter]

Don't 'think' anything. Just keep talking, the more she understands you as a person, the better your relationship will be. Questions in a relationship and honest answeres build trust. How can she understand you as a person and why you like what you like if is she dosen't ask questions ?

Kelly

[Eryn]

She certainly should be questioning! As a potential life partner it is in her best interest to find out everything about you.

If anyone could find a single answer to "why do we dress" they should be given the Nobel. That is more elusive than the Grand Unification!

We all question things. Talk it out with her. You may well find out more about yourself that way.

[ReineD]

I totally accept my SO and I also want to know why she dresses. We all want to know, even the crossdressers! lol :)


** Note: I use the word "crossdresser" because it's less complicated that way. But really my SO is a mix of genders.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi AH, It's like I've told my wife , "It's who I am & and it's what I do".

[marlenesexton]

Accepting isn't the same as understanding. She can accept you for who you are but maybe she just wants to know why you do it. If she asked why you like hunting, sports or motorcycles would you be concerned? You crossdress instead and maybe she's just curious.

[Beverley Sims]

Just answer the questions in a simple way and do not embellish on the subject.
Let her keep asking questions and she will eventually get all her answers.
It all goes well for a peaceful outcome and understanding.

[Barbara Ella]

Just know that questioning like this is not meant to invalidate what you do, only to increase understanding. My wife understands intellectually what I do, and wishes me to "find" my true self. She is extremely worried about what that may be, and is trying to understand the why/how this could have happened. If either of us can figure this out, we will be that much closer.

Barbara

[MysticLady]

My girlfriend who goes shopping with me and we buy lingerie together is now questioning why I dress. Of all people that I know I thought she would be the understanding one, now I don't know what to think.

This will be an example of her unconditional love. She maybe wondering to move forward with her life with or w/o you. I may be wrong, but my life experiences tell me otherwise. I wish the best for both of you.

[noeleena]

Hi.

Regardless of the detail here, its about do you really ...know ... each other. that takes years & even then there are things about each of us that are hidden or not seen. Jos & i were married for 24 years, did even then did she know all of me. ...no... she found out i was not male in the true sence of what a male is or should be i told her, i was intersexed, well female ooops a very different set of thinking, it was not hidden just was not seen not talked about because had i 55 years ago i would have been in side the nuthouse.

we'v been together for 35 years, known each other 39. we are as two sisters we are both women , just im the one whos different, still female ,

so you see its not what we know its what we dont know that makes or breaks a marrage friendship or other,

As we'd say air the dirty linnen it wont get clean till you wash it, so talk & tell.

...noeleena...