My neighbors didn't know I dressed!

[makin' it real]

How could they not?! We share a back yard and last summer I decided to go ahead and suntan in a bikini back there. So I laid out on occasion all summer long and built up a nice little set of tan lines. Where I laid out is no more than 20 feet from their kitchen window, which is directly over their sink. I heard them rattling around at the sink repeatedly while I was laying out and had to screw up my courage to either lay out at all if I was just getting there, or to stay out if the sound started after I was already there.

Well, last week I came home from class and told them about a student who had asked my advice for counseling a TG youth. They were a little surprised by the student seeking me out and I told them that my students know I'm dual-gendered or gender-fluid. Well the guy takes that in for a moment then thanks me for trusting him enough to come out to him too.

I was astonished! I almost chuckled a bit, but then mentioned the suntanning. Neither he nor his girlfriend had noticed me! All that stress and screwing up my courage was for nothing!

Are we really that invisible to others? Have you done things that you just KNOW will out you, and it turns out the other people still had no idea?

~Rachel

[Rachelakld]

Apart from cooking and cleaning dishes, at the sink, where the bay window has no curtains and looks on to the road opposite and about 12 houses, while wearing nighties, or pretty tops and bras, No can't think of anything.
Visited and chatted to a few yesterday, nobody mentioned anything either.

[Beverley Sims]

I think you would be surprised as to how many people have their head in the sand, and, do not notice.

[RADER]

My Kitchen faces the road, so I see the cars and the cute girls going down to the Park/Beach
going by all summer. The cars I do not notice as mush as the bikinis. LOL
Rader

[celeste26]

Beverly it is not so much that others have their "heads in the sand" as they are working on their own problems and have little time and energy to deal with other's problems especially during the normal working day.

[Sallee]

Rachel, I think Celeste has it right people are to busy with their own problems to really notice. They are not looking for CDs so they just don't notice. If they do most don't care. The ones that do got real problems

[Stephanie47]

It going to depend on the neighbors. Some really don't care what we do as long as it does not affect them. Others? Well, some will butt into your lifestyle because that's who they are.

For the longest time I've used my backyard as a retreat from spring to fall. Then the rain sets in. The house next to mine is a rental. I had met the neighbors and chatted with them. I guess one of them had noticed me fully en femme watering the rose garden. Given the physical layout of the properties, she had to go through contortions to notice me. Well, the entire family of assholes thought it would be great to just line up on their patio and strain their necks to see into my backyard. I had overheard a conversation between two of them indicating they were aware of my en femme appearance. Well, that curtailed freely using the backyard until they moved.

They did not rant and rave about my cross dressing. Did they tell other neighbors? I don't know. If they had been told none have changed how they interact with me.

I think many people are not looking for cross dressers or anyone else. Yes, if they notice, why say anything. With my neighbors, it was an extended family of three generations, all of whom did not work. All four adults were on the dole. They did not pay the rent. The asked neighbors for money to pay the utility bills. Their rental furniture was repossessed. Yep, unlike everyone else on the block who were working stiffs, these people had nothing better to do than try to entertain themselves.

[Chickhe]

I notice everything...well, except for the thinks I don't see. Your neighbors may have actually seen you but either did not realize it was you or just choose to wait for you to tell them out of respect for you. For example, if my neighbors let weeds graw on their lawn and I'm not thrilled about when they mention to me how hard it was to get rid of them I would probably say I hadn't noticed.... not sure why, maybe just to appear to be accepting in case I do something they don't like too...

[AllieSF]

I am somewhat like Chickhe and notice a lot of changes. But then there are times when nothing registers in my observation area of the brain. I do a lot of things that push the envelope and will probably be caught and outed one day, hopefully later rather than sooner. Now my daughter and granddaughter are great observers. My daughter knows that I use "nail strengthener" polish with a light regular pink polish under the top coat on my toe and finger nails and both always have a light shine on them. The last pedicure they tried a different pink, just a bit darker, and sure enough in front of all the rest of the family and friends, my daughter asked about my pink toe nail polish. Thankfully my mind had not been slowed too much by all the wine and champagne and I told her the truth that I just tried a pinkish color that would hopefully make my nails look more natural under the whitish nail strengthener polish, and that I didn't like it either! It worked and no more questions. So Far!

[PretzelGirl]

I think we get the ole suburbia feeling that all neighbors are nosy and that gets heightened by our anxieties of being out. I did a lot dead in front of my neighbors house and walked right up to him dressed and threw him for a loop. It isn't surprising since we line ourselves up for the worst so that we are ready to deal with it. Enjoy the sun this year!

[makin' it real]

I hear you all on the neighbors being oblivious sometimes, or perhaps just being considerate. When we went out to dinner a few months ago they made some passing comments about TGs which only barely could have been related to what we'd been talking about. That's another reason I simply assumed they knew. Ah well, apparently not. I've now asked them individually if they had seen me or guessed my TG status. He said he had no idea, she said she thought something like that might be going on but she wasn't sure.


Have you done things that you just KNOW will out you, and it turns out the other people still had no idea?

I remember another time going out to dinner with a friend who was visiting the area. She got into my glove box for some reason and pulled out the bra (or bikini, I forget which now) I had stashed in there. She said What's this? I told her it was mine an outed myself to her. She just laughed it off and wouldn't believe me until I showed her pictures during dinner. She thought some "conquest" of mine had left it behind. Would that were so! :rofl:

~Rachel