Wearing Wifes Clothes with Size Difference

[Homesteadjohn]

Thanks for all the replys

[Sallee]

better not let your wife know about the big butt or you might be out of luck It is better to get your own clothes or at least talk about sharing

[Shadeauxmarie]

They generally hate you wearing their clothes. Especially if you don't ask. Also, we tend to stretch them out. It's better to get your own.

[Jenniferathome]

Don't borrow anything you will stretch out. She'll be pissed AND if you are closeted, she'll KNOW. You need to buy your own things.

[ReineD]

Buy your own stuff. Better yet, tell your wife and THEN buy your own stuff. :)

[RenneB]

I agree...better to get your own. Although when I first said I do, the SO was a slim size 10.....I was a size 14, now she's an 18 and I'm a 12... She prefers calf length skirts and t shirts and I prefer LBDs...

Anyways, buy your own and you'll be happier....

Renne....

[Eryn]

My problem isn't a size difference, it's a height difference. Her pretty dresses often are cute tunic tops on me! :)

As others have said, buy your own clothes and very seriously consider letting her in on your secret before she finds out on her own. Women are very sensitive to others wearing their clothing, particularly underthings.

My wife and I have an "open closet" policy where we share freely. I love it when she wears something I've purchased and it somewhat justifies my clothing expenditures.

[Jtkeller]

you are right on

[Beverley Sims]

Yu are better off wearing clothes yo buy for yourself.
Most here do not advocate wearing spouses clothes without their permission.
You are headed for disaster if you are not already there.

[I Am Paula]

Even with permission, other than borrowing a cute top for a party, it's just right and polite to own your own clothes. Hers are hers. Also remember, yours are hers, just not vice versa.
Sharing underwear is just wrong.

[4mymichelle]

First of all welcome to the forum. It is always good for a new member to use the introduction forum to give a little background about themselves so we can better understand your situation and be able to offer our replies based on that. From reading what you have said you are trying to wear your wife's clothes without her knowledge or permission. In addition they are too small for you. As many others here have said this is not a good idea. Stop doing that now before she finds out and gets upset. The best approach is to be honest with her and tell her about your crossdressing desire. Buying your own clothes at this point is not an option now if you have to hide everything. Everyone's situation is different, but the one thing for sure is don't continue to wear your wife's clothes.

[Emogene]

Summation: Mine! yours! Use mine, ask! Like my borrowing your motorcycle (if you have one) without asking permission first. That type of behavior tends to get a hurt put on people. Just my opinion! :)

[DawnD]

My husband and I have a reasonably open closet. I am much larger than he is though so I can't fit into too many of his things. Just a few gypsy type skirts and a couple of his sweaters. I told him if I lost weight, we could double our wardrobe!

As for your question, there isn't much you can do except buy some of your own clothes. :D

[Sister Rachel]

Yup .. buy your own womenswear .. it's the only way. It's easy on the internet, retailers want your money and you'll be amazed how friendly and " accepting " they are, if only for that reason! My wife's a (British) size 16, I'm a 20, I'd wreck her stuff if I forced it on and it would NOT be comfortable :eek: Enjoy having your own lingerie drawer and your own skirts and dresses in the wardrobe :) Good luck!

[Eryn]

...I told him if I lost weight, we could double our wardrobe!

Wow, weight loss experts talk about buying one item in the desired size to use as motivation but a whole wardrobe? How could one resist! :)

[GG7irish]

."Big Butt"...i soooooo hope your wife does not read that lol. .......
My SO is smaller than I, I have given some clothes for her to wear and keep.....
I like to think Cass has her own sense of style and i like to help, but i do prefer we have our wardrobes.

[Leslie Langford]

My problem isn't a size difference, it's a height difference. Her pretty dresses often are cute tunic tops on me! :)

As others have said, buy your own clothes and very seriously consider letting her in on your secret before she finds out on her own. Women are very sensitive to others wearing their clothing, particularly underthings.

My wife and I have an "open closet" policy where we share freely. I love it when she wears something I've purchased and it somewhat justifies my clothing expenditures.


As a seasoned Cder (read: "older than dirt"), I also agree that is it is never a good idea to wear your wife's or SO's clothing without her permission, and especially if she doesn't know about your little "hobby" yet. She'll clue in soon enough, have the predictable WTF! moment, and you'll quickly discover to your chagrin that your @ss is grass, and she is a lawn mower. Besides which, that kind of stuff is bush league - as an adult, you have your own money and resources and can buy whatever you like. No need to skulk around like some broke teenager who would also love to experience wearing women's clothes, but hasn't got the means to buy his own...and even that isn't a proper justification for invading someone else's privacy this way.

That is not to say that I haven't been guilty of the same thing in my younger and less experienced days as well, but I have since seen the error of my ways, gotten religion, and can now come out unequivocally against this practice on so many levels. And clearly from the responses given above, there appears to be an almost unanimous consensus here among the other forum members that this is a "no-fly" zone.

I do, however, take exception with Eryn's blanket statement that "...Women are very sensitive to others wearing their clothing..."

I would argue that this actually is a very common practice among sisters, mothers and daughters, friends and room-mates etc. who happen to be the same size and like similar clothing styles. That said, I also understand that there is a whole different dynamic at play if it is the husband, brother, or boyfriend etc. who wants to share their female counterpart's clothes as that has all kinds of sexual undertones associated with that, not the least of which are the "creepy" and "ewww" factors. On this point, I would concur with Eryn.

Interestingly enough, there is also a very noticeable double standard at play when it comes to this type of thing, and women seem to think nothing of borrowing their SO's clothes on the pretext that they are more comfortable, practical, and durable etc. for whatever particular purpose they might have in mind. Hence the natural evolution of "menswear", "boy-shorts", and the "boyfriend jacket" etc. when it comes to contemporary women's wear. But when the male partner expresses a preference, for example, for pantyhose or tights to keep warm in winter as opposed to bulky and uncomfortable "long johns" - well, that's considered "weird" and a whole other matter.

All that said, for those Cder's here who are the same (or similar) size as their wives or SO's, and who knowingly and openly share their women's clothes with them - you are the rarity and the lucky ones, and more power to you. The rest of us can only look up to you with a mixture of awe, wonderment, and admiration. ;)

[marlenesexton]

I am so jealous of the girls that can swap clothes with their wives. I'm ten inches taller than my wife and more than double her weight. The only she owns that I can share is a scarf and even that looks to small. I must've pissed somebody off upstairs. Let's see crossdresser...built like an NFL lineman. ;)

I also look at those small, thin guys, you know like 5'5", 135 lbs, and wonder. Do they crossdress?. Probably waste it and haven't put on a dress in their lives. :)

[Angie G]

Honey get your own thing.:hugs:
Angie

[lingerieLiz]

You are living on borrowed time!!! She will figure it out very soon. Hope that you are reincarnated as a woman.
Rule 1 Never borrow without permission
Rule 2 Read Rule !

[CherylFlint]

Rule Number ONE is to NEVER, EVER wear anything of your wife's.
Rule Number Two is to NEVER, EVER use any of her makup.
If she wants to use your stuff, that's fine, but NEVER even think about "borrowing" any of her things, even if she suggests it.
Trust me on this.
There are two main reasons for Rule Number ONE.
The First is when you wear something that's really yours it has the added attraction of making the cross dressing even more real.
Secondly, you show respect for what is your wife's things and not mix and match to the point of you being an annoying little sister by "can I borrow this?" and "Can I borrow that?", "You wouldn't mind, would you?".
Just because a wife may say it's "Okay", it is NOT okay.
If you cross dress, do it 100% and get your own things.
Visit thrift stores, it's the smart way to shop.

[marlenesexton]

Hey! I'm going to have to show this to my wife. She borrows my makeup without asking. Women! ;)

[Dee Baker]

Buy your own stuff. Better yet, tell your wife and THEN buy your own stuff. :)

What Reine said!

Love you Reine, Youre the best!

[Cassandra Lynn]

Forgive me for the assumptions IF i'm wrong, but yes it's time for you to go shopping.

Judging by the way you asked your question (nonchalantly and all), it would seem your thinking it is very common for all CDers to borrow the nearest females clothing. Nothing could be further from the truth.......and everyone is actually going fairly easy on you in the replies.

Read around since your new (and welcome by the way) and you'll see that shopping isn't nearly as daunting as your making it out to be.
Goodwill stores can be your best friend. But the basic truth is that department/clothing stores would be delighted to accept your money.

[Kelly DeWinter]

Your issue is not with borrowing clothes, it's with respecting your spouse as a person, "Big Butt" indeed.

[Eryn]

I do, however, take exception with Eryn's blanket statement that "...Women are very sensitive to others wearing their clothing..."

I should have added the phrase "...without their knowledge." but I thought that it was implied by my final statement.

[Kat42]

Heh... As a rule I do not borrow my SO's clothes... She of course does not hold to the same code.

Most of the time I don't care, like when she wears my jeans. But I do have a small collection of T-shirts that are special to me. I don't wear them often (for preservation's sake). But she, not understanding the importance, will wear them like yesterday's laundry.

On one such occasion I commented somethig to the effect of "isn't it funny that you wearing my clothes is perfectly accepted by society, but my wearing yours is not." She countered with (in effect) "hey, what's mine is yours. knock yourself out." She knows I CD but is not enthusiastic.

Again, as a rule I do not wear her clothes. I just wanted to make the point.

Today I underdress everyday and my panties go through the laundry and end up back in my underwear drawer.

[Tracii G]

Its wrong to wear hers go get your own.

[Sandra]

Does she know? If not go and buy your own!

[kimdl93]

Not a good idea under any circumstances. If she doesn't know, she will notice stretched damaged garments. If she does know, she'll tell you to buy your own.

[Donna St. Marten]

John,

Stop wearing your wife's clothes, no good will come of it. Go out and buy your own.

[Mickey_39]

John, I'd be willing to wager that once you have tried on your favorite item(s) in the correct size your current question would be a non-issue. There is no way to really explain what a good fit feels like.

I also look at those small, thin guys, you know like 5'5 , 135 lbs, and wonder. Do they crossdress?. Probably waste it and haven't put on a dress in their lives. :)

Never assume anything. My wife knows she will never fit in my sz 0 pants. (5'9" , 133 lbs.)

[Joanne f]

My wife will let me borrow anything I like but I do not think it is right for me to do so as there is a size difference and I would not want to brake anything of hers so I wait until she has finished with it to try it on but unfortunately it is usually far to small to fit me unless it is a wool thing that has gone baggy over time , so it's buy my own most of the time ( well to be honest my wife will quite often buy it for me ):D

[Stephanie47]

Yep, get your own wardrobe. My wife has put on some weight, and, I have been stable for a long time. I know she can wear many of my dresses, if she knew about them. She has two that she has never worn (Kohl's) that definitely would fit me. I so want to wear them. But! They're hers. I always wonder, if I were to pass away tomorrow, what she would do with all the Venezia and Merona dresses and others that would fit her? Would she dispose of them because they would reminder her of her non acceptance or would she think I had good sense of style and keep them?

As to wearing the clothing of others without an invite...don't! When I was a teenager and dabbling with my mother's undergarments, I wore her one and only black bra that had no stretch to it. I broke one strap. I quickly put it back. Nothing was ever said. Did he know? Was it me? Or my brother? Women know when you mess with their stuff!

[giuseppina]

First, welcome to the forum.

Second, wearing your wife's clothes is a cardinal sin without obtaining her permission. A large percentage of women are not OK with this and consider it a violation of their privacy.

Third, I suggest you remove the comments about her body shape. This is a public forum and if your wife finds your comments, chances are very high there will be some contaminated ventilators in your house. This is often a very touchy issue for the genetic ladies.

And lastly, it's time you owned up to your wife about wearing her clothes. Chances are good she already knows something is up and is waiting for an opportunity. Don't get caught, as this can easily be dynamite in your situation.

I haven't read all of the thread, but this is a long-closed thread about disclosure written by a respected GG who no longer posts:

http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?13841-How-to-tell-your-partner&highlight=

[JackieOhNo]

Be careful with the butt remarks
Definitely need your own undies
I am able to wear some of my wife's tops,but always ask first....ask please thanks
Wife let's me " borrow" jewelry
If money is the problem,use The Salvation Army Store. I have purchased many nice articles that look new,and the purchases
help the SalvationArmy help other people.
JackieOhNo

[linda allen]

Im curious on how anyone dresses up in their wifes clothes if your wife is alot smaller than you are. .................. .

Well, you don't. You can't. That's why they make different sizes and you can't get a size eighteen body into a size ten dress. If you try, you will either stretch the clothes or rip them.

I'm guessing that you are dressing when she is not around and she doesn't know about it. I can tell you from experience that life is a lot easier if she does know about it. You don't have the fear of being caught.

Telling her is a decision you have to make on your own and there have been many threads on it.

If you choose not to tell her, my advice would be to get your own clothes and keep them out of sight. There have been many threads on how to do this also.

[switcheralso]

It looks like you are new to the forum and maybe even new to C/D. First off welcome and you will get a mix of answers that is for sure to any question you post. If your new you will be learning and making a few mistakes and most of us have been in your shoes. I would tell you that it is important not to wreck your wife clothing. Get your courage and mind set right and go and buy 1 article of clothing. I would suggest Wal-Mart they have a wide selection and there is always a great clearance rack.

[Danielle001]

I lived with my wife for several years before we got married. I purged all of my clothes before moving in with her, but soon found myself trying on her clothes. I fit into a lot of her clothes, except for shoes. I slowly started to build up my own collection of clothes again, but I couldn't resist her great wardrobe. Years later, when I came out to her with my CDing, me wearing her clothes was a regular source of drama and arguments. Not worth it. Best to get your own own clothes, even more so if you and your wife are not the same size.

[BRANDYJ]

I look at wearing your wife's clothes without her knowing or her giving you permission, as a gross invasion of privacy.It is just so wrong many ways, regardless of size or fit.
I've had 2 wives that knew and accepted my being a CD. Also my last girlfriend knew and accepted it. In all those years I NEVER tried on their clothes. Respect your wife and go buy your own.

[IngeInCO]

Buy your own stuff. Better yet, tell your wife and THEN buy your own stuff. :)

I totally agree! My wife and I share many things like T's and skirts often. I did wear her things before I told her. Now I have my own clothes and we have agreed to share.

[Karren H]

You should have chosen your mate by what dress size she wore! like I did.... of coarse then mine got larger and I got smaller and now its the other way around.... I was a prolific "borrower" when I was younger and I'm sure I stretched out way more than I realized.... Even wore my 10th grade english teachers lingerie more than a few times! Just remember.... Its easier to ask forgiveness that it is permission! lol

[Cheryl Ann Owens]

The only time I would wear my wife's things is if she suggested it. She is smaller than me so it's not that practical though she had me try on her wedding dress after we got married. <GRIN!!!> On the other hand she can try anything I own. I had her try my favorite peach colored 38B bra and now it's her favorite and a staple in her wardrobe! I've made up for it! Oh well......

Cheryl Ann

[Kelly DeWinter]

................... Even wore my 10th grade english teachers lingerie more than a few times! ..................


OK Karren , I KNOW there's a story there somewhere , but I don't believe that there is a section rated for it !

[mikiSJ]

There was a time, 37 years ago, when if I laid on the bed, pulled in with all my might on my gut, blew out all of the air in my lungs, I could just barely close the zipper and button on a beautiful pair of lambskin pants that my wife had.

Today, neither of us can fit into the pants that still hang in her closet. We have vastly different sizes now and I buy my own clothes so I don't shred, oops, I mean stretch hers.

[Miriam-J]

I have the good fortune of having a wife who *used* to be close to my size, at least for blouses, skirts, and dresses. Since she lost a lot of her weight, she has selectively passed along a number of items to me. Kinda the best of all worlds ... I don't borrow her clothes without permission, yet I get to wear a lot of her clothes anyway.

Miriam

[Di]

Buy your own:eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek:

[heatherdress]

I agree with all the good comments - tell your wife, buy your own stuff and forget the big butt comments.

I am impressed, however, that you have successfully worn her panties, jeans and tops being 50 pounds heavier and 5 inches taller. Nice work!

You will have much more fun with your own heels, a sexy dress which fits and panties which don't cut off your circulation.