What do you do about your voice?

[alesha_cd]

For those of you who venture out into public, how do you treat situations where someone speaks to you (if your voice clearly is not feminine)? I pretty much avoid situations where someone may attempt to speak to me because my voice would surely give me away. I wish I could develop a convincing female voice but I think it's not an option for me. :(

[Donna Joanne]

You can give this a try: http://www.genderlife.com/voice-consultation/voice-tutor/ . It is a "free" program she has posted on Youtube for MTF voice feminization. Hope you have success with your journey.
Donna

[Lynn Marie]

Good luck with your voice training.

I'm pretty much fully aware that for the most part I'm just not going to pass. At 6'3" with really broad shoulders, square jaw, and big hands, the best I can do is to stride in with my head held high in classy attire and own the place. My silly voice isn't going to make much difference!

[stephNE]

I'm not so sure I pass and my voice is deep enough that I cannot really ever have a femme voice. I avoid speaking situations as much as possible, and when I need to speak, I soften it as much as possible. When I have tried to have a feminine voice, it sound too falsetto, like Minnie Mouse!

[marlenesexton]

Good luck with your voice training.

I'm pretty much fully aware that for the most part I'm just not going to pass. At 6'3" with really broad shoulders, square jaw, and big hands, the best I can do is to stride in with my head held high in classy attire and own the place. My silly voice isn't going to make much difference!

Exactly. I wish I looked good enough that my voice was my problem. If it is the last piece of the puzzle for you, good luck with the training. I'm still trying to find a dress that doesn't leave me looking like a big guy in a dress. ;)

[Beverley Sims]

I speak more softly and get my range up a bit, seems to be satisfactory.

[Kate Simmons]

I gave up on that part a long time ago, too much work. I read a book by a noted CD Alison Liang and she said it's not how you sound, it's how you talk and what you talk about. That's pretty much the stance I adopted. In any case, people have no problem calling me Ericka(my club persona) at the club or if I'm out somewhere else. Like I always say, it's about who we are, not what we are. Works for me.:battingeyelashes::)

[linda allen]

Avoiding situations where you have to speak is best, but some are unavoidable. If you're walking down the street and someone says "good morning", Hello", etc. you pretty much have to answer back. I raise my pitch and speak softly and probably sound like Michael Jackson (when he was alive). I suppose you could wear a portable sound system and earphones to keep people from trying to talk to you.

[Aly Cat]

Headphones! thats actually a good idea. Just have the headphones tucked into your bra or something and before you go into a place with public interaction like a store, pull them out and plug them into your phone. You dont even have to have music going lol. The appearance alone will deter people from interacting with you lol. Thats awesome.

I have a deep baritone voice which gets even worse when I have allergies...like...think Barry White and deeper. Sooooo not exaggerating. No hope for me on the vocal front. :(

[KaraK]

That's a good question. Mine is more like Mika's one (between him and Andrej Pejic i'd say) than Barry White's but I don't know if I can speak hours with a higher and softly voice than my natural one. Some girls have lower voices so maybe it will be ok.

[andrea lace]

If you pass as female it adds to the fun to reply in a deep male voice when asked a question. I am sure it would throw many off there guard and funny to boot

[Ceri Anne]

I usually speak softer and raise my voice just slightly. I also have a deep baritone voice. I sing Karaoke and sing male and female songs. I always sing with a little more whisper in my voice and up higher when singing. I had once situation where the song went out of range and I had to drop down. A guy came up afterwards and asked if I was a guy..........oops

[Jorja]

I had a friend who at the time was a high school music teacher. She helped me raise my voice to sound like most females. Practice, practice, practice and once you find your femme voice do not try to switch back and forth. That just does not work for most people.

[Aly Cat]

Ya, the Berry White is where im most comfortable, but if i really push my voice, the highest i can go is something like this. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BX3hun3DLeQ&feature=youtube_gdata_player.
I still cant hit the higher notes at the climax of the song. On the plus side, i can match pitch with his normal singing. My voice feels tired afterwards though. I love this song.

[Nikki A.]

Its not the voice, it's the attitude. If you're comfortable, smile and modulate a little, if everything else looks good, the voice may not be that big an issue.

[2B Natasha]

Likes my here. I don't do anything. I just go out and be. My voice is like many close to Barry white or Isaac Hayes. So don't do anything about it. I meet people and talk to them. I used to avoid talking but that's no fun. I LOVE to talk. So avoiding a conversation is not gonna happen.

You think. " We'll you pass so well nobody cares ". No I don't. I am 6' 3" and I weigh something.

Life's to short to hide.

[Rogina B]

I am out and about all the time in the mainstream world..and I just speak..There is more than my voice that would "clock me" to the "keen observer" lol

[IngeInCO]

I do a Mick Jagger... And nod and smile a lot

[rachaelsloane]

I go out with a friend in SF two/three times a week and always have conversations with those around us and have never tried to change my voice. What happens, is they are more involved with the conversation and are quickly disarmed. Some are curious as to why I do what I do and compliment me on dress, hair, etc. Bottom line is, the voice doesn't make the person.

[Cheryl T]

I soften my voice a bit and speak in a slightly higher tone than usual and just go with it.

[noeleena]

Hi,

Wether one accepts or not wont really matter. i had a bit of help. & no one helped no voice training, or any out side well what ever ones does,

Now i have spoken to large groups of people many 100's plus because i do photography i get people to move to where i need them to be . many from our groups some few 100 at different times so they hear me quite well.

Now i did & do sing in choirs so have a good range with that from barotone to soprano now im not saying real low or high just a medium range,

yet that did not do much. yet my voice did change some years ago. with out myself trying to. my own hormones did the work for me. because of my difference it worked quite well i was a bit surprised yet really it was just another little detail that took place or the start of 20 years ago. there were other changes going on then as well.

One interesting point is my brain / mind went into a female mode. part of what i am any way. how to explain, its like the controler in the brain took my voice & changed it from where it was to where it is now, like i said accept or not, my hormones because of that difference does & can change details , & with out outside help. Its just part of my makeup or how my body works, I know some have said it cant happen.... well thats okay . try being weird things happen.....

...noeleena...

[linda allen]

Clearly there are two different schools of thought here. One to look, act, and sound like a female and two, to go out dressed in women's clothes and not worry about the rest.

I think the OP is trying to do the first.

If you seriously listen to and study the female voice you'll find it's not only the pitch, but the resonance and the inflections of the voice. Many females talk in a pitch that's lower than some males, but it's still a female voice.

Another thing - A female will typically use many more words to make a point than a man. For example, someone asked my wife how she found the breeder where we bought our new puppy. I would have said "She is a relative of someone at the gym I go to." Before I could answer however, my wife said "Well someone at our doctor's office had a relative who had some and we went and saw them but they looked too big and their tails weren't docked so we were still looking around but then someone at the gym had an aunt who was a breeder and had two so we went and looked but thyey were too small to bring home so we picked one out and went back and got her when she was old enough to leave her mother."

:heehee:

[bobbimo]

When ever I am in the car, alone of course, I read everything I can out loud and after a short while you can feel the difference in your voice. I dont think I have a femme voice, but I can sure tell when the man drops in.
The You tube link mentioned earlier is very good too
Bobbi

[Frédérique]

What do you do about your voice?

Nothing. I don’t even try, not even “vocal fry,” and I don’t know why... :idontknow:

[Michelle (Oz)]

I'm out and about pretty frequently.

Oh I would love to be able to speak with a fem voice for those very few times that I'm in an awkward situation. Ladies rest rooms are up there. So the references are helpful.

99% of the time though, I just use my normal happy male voice. Folk aren't surprised (guess I don't pass either) and their accepting attitude seems to reflect my honesty. Freedom to talk reduces the loneliness of a crossdresser and generates some rewarding interchanges.

[aprilgirl]

Like many others have already stated, I don't try to alter my voice other than perhaps speaking in a softer tone. Truth is, when anyone is close enough to engage in a conversation with me I have already sent off some visual cues. Any attempt to disguise my voice in close proximity would be a lost cause at that point. Looking people in the eye and smiling has served me well, and if anyone hadn't realized prior before conversing, they haven't missed a beat.

[CherylFlint]

Really? Truthfully? I point at my throat and whisper “Sorry, laryngitis”.
Works every time.

[2B Natasha]

[QUOTE=linda allen;3208307]Clearly there are two different schools of thought here. One to look, act, and sound like a female and two, to go out dressed in women's clothes and not worry about the rest.

What dunderhead statement. It's not true at all. Just because I don't try and change my voice doesn't mean anything. Sheesh

[Jennifer Kelly]

It hasn't been an issue for me because I haven't been out dressed yet. But it is something I think about for when that day comes. At this point all I can probably do is raise my pitch a bit and speak more softly. But since I haven't practiced the whole mannerisms thing I'm going to give myself away long before I open my mouth. :)

[NANNETTE]

I'm with Beverly on this, speaking softly and raising my voice an octave or two.

[Jana]

I wish I could develop a convincing female voice but I think it's not an option for me. :(

I think you can, but it'll take A LOT of practice. Pitch alone is just part of the challenge. It also takes mastering enunciation, speed, breathing, choice of words and what not. If you are not interested in working with a voice coach, there are some resources out there that may help. Google Kathe Perez and also Andrea James.

Good luck.

[Sally24]

I've talked to Kathy Perez and she said that anyone who stuck with it eventually got an acceptable female voice. But it does take a lot of practice!

[StephanieH]

I've only been out fully dressed maybe a dozen times, and all but maybe two of those occasions I was in the French Quarter in New Orleans, so the voice didn't really matter. I used to try speaking softer and just adding a bit of raspy to it, but that just sounds dumb. My wife's been out with me every time I've gone out dressed and so, on an early outing in the Quarter I just gave up trying to sound like a girl and put on a thick drag queen Rue Paul's Drag Race accent like I was some gay drag queen, and amazingly, that instantly put everybody in the whole world at ease and suddenly made me into some kind of hero or something. "Normal" people in a party town actually like being in the company of someone who's openly a transvestite or crossdresser, and adding the flamboyant voice (only when needed, I never went out of my way to do it) instantly put a smile on everyone's face near me. I had grandma's (and groups of hot chicks - much to my wife's concern ;-)) wanting to buy me drinks and have their photos taken with me - no joke! It's a crazy world out there!

[MsRenee]

I dont change anything its always fun to see the expression on their face hehe.
Was standing at a crosswalk with another lady and she said I looked very nice. tats when I said thank you and she said "Wow". Now my voice isnt manly but not femenine and she said I look realy goos and said thnk you for the compliment and wents our seperate ways.
Renee

[windycissy]

When I'm out with the girls we're all having so much fun just talking to each other and the people we meet that it really doesn't matter, but sometimes it's nice to try, and there are a lot of great tips already: speak softer, raise the pitch a little, and practice, practice, practice!

[Prissy Linda]

my girl voice needs some work, the best I have been able to achieve is to sound like a stereotypical effeminate gay guy so I just speak softly when I have to.

[alesha_cd]

Thanks for all the replies. I feel that I pass 95% of the time but I would love to be able to develop a feminine voice to add to it. It's not a necessity but it would be interesting. Also, as some have pointed out, speaking in my male voice would be interesting too. ;)

[Sabrina133]

I've only been out fully dressed maybe a dozen times, and all but maybe two of those occasions I was in the French Quarter in New Orleans, so the voice didn't really matter. I used to try speaking softer and just adding a bit of raspy to it, but that just sounds dumb. My wife's been out with me every time I've gone out dressed and so, on an early outing in the Quarter I just gave up trying to sound like a girl and put on a thick drag queen Rue Paul's Drag Race accent like I was some gay drag queen, and amazingly, that instantly put everybody in the whole world at ease and suddenly made me into some kind of hero or something. "Normal" people in a party town actually like being in the company of someone who's openly a transvestite or crossdresser, and adding the flamboyant voice (only when needed, I never went out of my way to do it) instantly put a smile on everyone's face near me. I had grandma's (and groups of hot chicks - much to my wife's concern ;-)) wanting to buy me drinks and have their photos taken with me - no joke! It's a crazy world out there!

Agreed Randi. Was in NOLA last weekend. We went to bars and clubs and was very surprised at the number of CDs out there. Some very passable some not so much. No one gave anyone a second look. It was a great time.

[Sabrina133]

I've talked to Kathy Perez and she said that anyone who stuck with it eventually got an acceptable female voice. But it does take a lot of practice!

So true Sally. I had a great voice coach but it took a lot of practice and concentration to eventually get it right, and have it as second nature whenever dressing.

[MssHyde]

thank you for throwing the voice link out there

[KimberlyJean]

I have never had a manly voice, when I was younger it bothered me but now I see it as an asset. As long as I don't hit any low points my voice is pretty much passable as female.