kids

[Deanna B]

hi all. the kids saw me dressed in full wig,make up and a skirt on with boobs . and it went well . i just started going out to a club/bar for cd and i met some lovely ladies. i don't think i pass but the girls do . my kids are 7,9 and 11 and they are ok with it . Just wanting to hear what your experiences are regarding telling family members about CD or venturing out for the first time.take care all love deanna xx

[Annette Todd]

Deanna,
I am sure you know that there is a wide range of opinions on this subject ranging from being a good idea to absolutely not. I don't really have feelings one way or the other. I have thought about coming out to my son. Although, my "loving" ex has probably evicted the cat from its bag.
Further, I feel that hiding from the kids is just a continuation of staying in the closet. Kids are actually probably more accepting and understanding than we would give them credit for. Younger children have not usually learned the concept of love being conditional to a learned morality. If our kids have been loved unconditionally (which I feel is the only way love can be expressed) then they will in turn reflect that unconditional love. That doesn't mean that we allow kids to be bullies or do drugs or whatever else. We also must guide them and let them know those harmful behaviors are unacceptable but that does not preclude loving them.
I think your experience is proof that they are not going to judge or not accept a father who dresses up.

Just my opinion for whatever it's worth.

Annette

[SharonDD]

Well my ex makes my life difficult. I have three kids. They all know and the oldest is ok with it but has never seen Sharon. Both the younger two are influenced by their mom and want nothing to do with me. Hostile in fact and the have seen me. Losing kids over this is extremely difficult. Fathers Day was a bust, no calls. Life is short and as hard as it is, I choose to see what tomorrow brings. Life isn't perfect and neither am I but in the end I can only be me... a crossdresser and not pretend to be something I am not. My kids are grown by the way. And a Grandchild 5years old I am not allowed to see.

[Rogina B]

I have it good...a lot by design. My 11yr old daughter enjoys going out with "her Aunt Rogina". Everyone's situation and opinion with kids varies..Some are afraid to be seen dressed by the family dog,let alone children. If it is an important part of you,then you take the risks for acceptance.If not,you keep it hidden. Miley Cyrus is stripping AND kissing girls,so today's kids are exposed to a lot more than many parents think!

[Leah Lynn]

You may need to explain that what happens at home, stays at home. This can be a CYA, as well as protecting the kids. Kids like to talk and if they let it out that dad wears a dress, other kids could be merciless towards them. Kids can be extremely cruel.
Leah

[mikiSJ]

Deanna - I am glad this went well for both you and your kids.

My kids are 46 (married) and 35 and my wife feels I will permanently harm them if I tell them about Miki. (Go figger!)

[Rogina B]

Miki,Is she worried about the dog seeing you as well?

[mikiSJ]

Surprisingly, about 20 years ago we had two female German Shepherds and when I dressed and , they were really confused - for about 5 seconds.

My wife doesn't understand that the kids (fully functioning adults) would also be confused for about 5 seconds.

[Annette Todd]

Deanna - I am glad this went well for both you and your kids.

My kids are 46 (married) and 35 and my wife feels I will permanently harm them if I tell them about Miki. (Go figger!)

Permanent harm? Cutting off one of their extremities would be permanent harm. Dad wearing a dress? At their ages it might come as a shock but we can all recover from that!

cheers

Annette

[mikiSJ]

Cutting off one of their extremities would be permanent harm. Dad wearing a dress? At their ages it might come as a shock but we can all recover from that

Trust me Annette, my wife would rather I cut off an extremity (well, maybe a hang nail) on one of the kids than let them know about Miki.

[noeleena]

Hi ,

had it been posiable they our three kids would have known what i was then they of cause do & have done for 8 years, ages now 34 36 37, plus 9 grandkids, who all know what i am,

Had it been posiable they should have been brought up with my difference, it would have saved a lot of angish heartache not knowing & other issues, of why im like i am, our 9 grandkids have been brought up with who i am , i wont say they fully understand nore will they till for some years to come,

Yes theres all the hype as to not tell our children or you,rfamily, , quess what you bring up your child with your difference the child will grow into knowing what is going on , this hideing is not the way, regardless of excuse;s they all disaper as the child grows, because of being brought up with nothing hidden, be hoinst be truthfull . & yes answer all ?'s with in a way the children can understand youll save a lot of heartache that i know,

You read them storys of times past you show them pics as well men all dressed up in Renaissance times or when ever, & they ask why are those men dressed like that what will you tell them oh its wrong its not right, no of cause not , today is not different from then its fashon & western thinking thats wrong well some people, any way because they dont know the truth,

Take your kids on a ride back through history oh yea its boreing , is it, dont think so , show them the so so lovely clothes that were worn fantastic lovely garb = clothes, If we dont get off our backsides & show our kids what really is there who will. the next people are our kids, . so what you going to say ummm ...oh ...well .... lie ..... when your kids ask . i dress this way because my fore fathers did years ago. & i do because its nice & it shows a bit more about who i am as a person or your case a ....Father....., who can show ....LOVE.... whats wrong with being different .

iv had 55 out of allmost 66 years, & im really different.

...noeleena...

[Deanna B]

hi ladies . thank you all for your time to post your view and your opinions . the two youngest are really ok with it but the oldest is a bit mmmmmm about it . oh yes and my dog was a bit confused too lol dear of him .love you all deanna xx

[Barbra P]

My daughters, now 30 and 35, knew I dressed from the time they were in High School (probably even earlier) and simply referred to me as Aunt Barbra. My oldest had a slumber and swimming party when she was in High School and asked if I would dress so there would only be girls present; none of her friends seemed to have a problem with me en femme. Unfortunately I didn’t have a woman’s bathing suit so I couldn’t go swimming.

My youngest made a poor choice when picking a mate and when he abandoned her for someone else she moved back in and subsequently obtained a divorce. She has two daughters, 7 & 8 now, and she did not wish for me to hide from her daughters and I have dressed in their presence. The first couple of times they saw me they asked her why I dressed like a girl and she told them that I liked dressing that way and that seemed to be OK. I think they may like Aunt Barbra better than Pop-Pop as Barbra is softer and more forgiving. In the absence of their father Pop-Pop gets stuck with the disciplinary duties while Barbra spoils them.

[shawnsheila]

I have 4 kids ranging from 6 - 14 and my oldest would probably be uncomfortable with it but i know the 3 younger ones would be fine... especially my daughter... she already paints my nails when I am in boy mode and I enjoy it :) My wife and I did agree that we will wait until the kids are 18+ in age before we tell them though (unless a sexuality question comes up before hand, then i'll use it as a way to tell them they are normal and fine and that we love them no matter what) it would be a nice weight off my shoulders if I can be sheila all day though.

[suzy1]

Hi Deanna, its nice to hear from you again.:)

This is a hard and nasty world sometimes.

When your children’s friends get to hear that there dad wears a dress then it’s probable that two things will happen. They will get bullied and they will start to feel ashamed of their dad.

This is not what you want to hear and I hope I am totally wrong. But I have seen it with my own eyes.

All the best,

Suzy



I think shawnsheila is very wise.

[Rogina B]

Suzy,That may not be the case..A lot depends on how liberal minded your kid's world is.As kids get older,what happens at home has a better chance of staying at home if the entire family is on the same page. Everyone's situation is different.Rogina isn't a bag of clothes in a closet,so acceptance around me is very important. Every household operates differently.

[Deanna B]

Hi

Yes, I do worry about them being bullied at school if it is ever found out but I have told them that this is something I do, it doesn't harm anyone and that everyone is different. I don't do it when their friends are around. I feel that if I left it till they were much older or 18 as suggested, they would be brain washed by society and not open minded as they are now. But everyone has their own opinions and ways of dealing with what is obviously a sensitive issue for those involved. love de xxx

[freeindress]

No family with kids yet, but I'd come out to everybody and make sure the kids would be able to tell at school that keeping gender stereotypes belongs to the dark pages of history against other skin colors or religious beliefs.

[giuseppina]

That one is only going to work once, Amanda. Children are very perceptive and have excellent BS detectors.

You could try telling the truth. Chances are very high her daughter will be accepting unless somebody has already tried to indoctrinate her about gender stereotypes. Her bio father may try to make things difficult for you.

[Beverley Sims]

With the kids, just hope they don't spill the beans inadvertently.