Now I really know what its like to be treated as a woman!

[suzy1]

I am a debater and do a lot of debating online. The subject I debate isn’t important except it is not connected to C.D.ing.

So a few months ago I joined a new and very active site.
The only things they ask you to register are your email address and user name, not your gender.
So I registered as Suzy. Now you may think that’s dishonest but I am transgender, Suzy is a part of the real me so I feel O.K. about it. Also I find it so much easier to formulate a post in ‘Suzy mode’

The forum is well moderated, no obscene language and only personal attacks up to a point but going there is like being thrown to the wolves! It’s O.K. as I can hold my own there most of the time.

But the fascinating thing is they only know me as Suzy. I have always thought the name Suzy gives an impression of a sort of fun loving girl that is up for almost anything, in other words, me!:)

So to the point, how am I treated? Well it’s fascinating. I get a lot of polite responses to my posts but I also detect that I am sometimes humoured a little or a male member will very kindly put me right on a point [even though he is wrong, men!] and I regularly get treated as if I am a little bit out of my depth in this male orientated male dominated forum.

I am a little bit irritated but at the same time just a little bit flattered.:battingeyelashes:

Right, back to the debate……………………….:dance:

[Sister Rachel]

Very interesting! I wonder how one would be treated if one signed on as, say, "Charlene" as opposed to .. erm .. "Harriet", perhaps? Time for me to shut down the PC and hit the hay tonight .. but I'll follow this thread tomorrow! :)

[Kate Simmons]

Sometimes even when they KNOW we are en femme, they tend to talk down to us since we are fulfilling the female role. Guys! They really don't have a clue.:)

[Nisha]

On an on-line forum, the responses you get are about what and how you have written. You must have been polite yourself in your postings.

On-line it can get ugly pretty fast. And anyone with a female name will be dubbed a bit** pretty fast too.

On-line, it is all behind a curtain.

[linda allen]

I was "Linda" on a non-crossdressing related web forum for a while and I saw some of the "a female can't possibly know about this stuff" attitude.

[Ressie]

What can you do, there are stereotypes that are in our subconscious. But now you get an idea of what women go through every day.

[melissakozak]

Men, for the most part, won't value a woman's opinion as much as a man's opinion, period. It sucks for women in our society who have aspirations of becoming leaders...they are most often perceived as uncaring and/or bitchy while a man is viewed as confident and intelligent and successful. Not all is roses and lollipops in the woman's world...in addition to the catcalling, etc. There is no superior gender as each has some extremely negative and positive attributes and expectations. I think sometimes we overvalue these differences, and I think we often get mired in our supposed gender roles, not realizing the underlying human qualities we universally share. Oh what a brave new world that has such people in it!

[linda allen]

Men, for the most part, won't value a woman's opinion as much as a man's opinion, period. It sucks for women in our society who have aspirations of becoming leaders...they are most often perceived as uncaring and/or bitchy while a man is viewed as confident and intelligent and successful. Not all is roses and lollipops in the woman's world...

Very true and it's something I think about every time I see a post "If you could, would you be transformed into a woman?"

I had the pleasure of working with a very intelligent and capable (and attractive) female for several years and this helped me to realize that men aren't inherently superior to women, at least mentally.

[kimdl93]

well, condescension is a nasty male trait, but not uniquely so. Very interesting experiment!

[docrobbysherry]

And Suzy, that was exactly my experience the ONE TIME I have passed out in vanilla public. It was last Halloween at a large vanilla dance event. I was sitting with several other like costumed GGs who knew my gender. The men came by to check us out and ask one of or other us to dance.

It was a humbling and illuminating experience to be looked over, stared at, and finally approached by a hesitant few! Being taken as a female is no easy walk in the park!

[Chari]

Suzy, Could it be that some of the "debaters" on that forum are GG's posing as men? IMO there is a lot of deception in life and the internet has provided another means to use "smoke & mirrors.

[mikiSJ]

First of all - do you wear that gorgeous leather skirt you showed us a couple of days ago when you are debating as Suzy? (Should give you an 'I don't give a damn attitude!'.

Secondly, as a debater, you should use the sexist attitude of your opponent as an opening to shut him (usually) down and without any remorse on your part.

I also love to debate online and since I identify as a liberal, progressive, Democrat, commie, pinko, whatever...I end up with similar comments, albeit not with your sexist bias, to what you experience. I take that opportunity to pounce - with both feet and all of my mind.

IAC, get used to the sexism. It goes with the territory.

[Beverley Sims]

Another way to be treated like a woman is to go out and try to buy a car...
You want a Hummer and they tell you that what you really need is a pink lay bug.

[suzy1]

Suzy, Could it be that some of the "debaters" on that forum are GG's posing as men? IMO there is a lot of deception in life and the internet has provided another means to use "smoke & mirrors.

Nop! It’s not that kind of forum and you can tell there men, you really can.:straightface:


You must have been polite yourself in your postings.
On-line it can get ugly pretty fast.
.

I just post as me, Suzy.

I am a veteran debater. I eat ugly for breakfast.:heehee: