Sent home

[vetobob9]

Not really. I didn't work today but I went in on my personal time to teach them how to do a midday report because I am leaving in 5 weeks.
The shirt I usually wear is a black button up man's shirt with a black woman's t shirt underneath.
Regretfully my guy shirt lost it buttons so when I got there I took it off because I thought that a woman's t shirt would look better than a man's shirt that has multiple bleach stains and is missing half its buttons.
I guess I was wrong.
The boss said I needed to change right away because I looked like a girl and employees customers were complaining. I made sure he knew I was transsexual and he said if it was in Austin he would not have an issue but this is a religious small town and he did not want to offend people. So I put on the shirt with stains and virtually no buttons and they said that was better.
I know that no customers were complaining, it was just one employee. She claimed the customers were scared by it and since there was only one table and the people there had not said anything. I simply responded (with a big smile) that she was the one who was scared (even though the actual word I should have used was bigoted but I kept my cool and my great big smile). I was laughing at the whole thing. She was talking about how men should only wear men's clothes if they are born as men.
That was just the tip of the ice berg dear sisters.
She claims it should be illegal for men to go into any business wearing any article of women's clothing.
The other employees said I was bold for showing up like that but that I should wear a regular t shirt instead of a v neck. Even with guy shirts I do not understand the difference between v necks and round necks.
Then it turned into a question of whether transgender people are gay. Another question based on stereotypes.
The whole time none of them noticed I was wearing women's pants.

[Jamie001]

It sounds like you live in backwoods Bubba-City.

[Tracii G]

Should have asked that lady when she decided to be straight.

[Julie Gaum]

You certainly ran into one bigoted b---h but your boss seems to be okay. I'm curious --- why are you leaving in five weeks? Tell us a little bit about your plans.
Julie

[Michelle.M]

You certainly ran into one bigoted b---h but your boss seems to be okay.

Well, let's see . . .


I made sure he knew I was transsexual

So he knows that vetobob9 is in a group that traditionally suffers discrimination . . .


and he said if it was in Austin he would not have an issue but this is a religious small town

. . . and instead of having vetobob9's back the boss caves in to what he perceives as endemic community intolerance. And worse, the boss' moral code seems to be based on his zip code.


and he did not want to offend people.

But it's perfectly OK to offend vetobob9, a valued employee.


I know that no customers were complaining, it was just one employee.

And when the boss had to choose between the prejudice of one employee who seems to have lied in order to give a moral justification for her complaint (lying to uphold morality - what irony!) and vetobob9's well-being, he chose to support the liar.

In what way does the boss seem to be OK?

[daarleane]

What is the big deal about wearing a v-neck instead of a crew neck anyway? What is wrong with a person wearing a little color also instead of drab? I would be inclined to asked your female bigot why she isn't at home where she is supposed to be as her presence upsets me in the work place. of course I certainly wouldn't want her to wear pants in public. let's return back to the "good old days' with Archie bunker. Of course all of the the latter items make you just as much of a bigot as she is.

[Beverley Sims]

Like Julie I am a sticky nose as well and wonder if your leaving has anything to do with your sexuality.
As for that "woman" just ignore her or score points against her with dignity.
I wear V necked tops a lot with little problem.

[vetobob9]

The v neck draws attention to my breasts but I think my breasts would stick out slightly even in a crew neck.

My leaving has nothing to do with my sexuality. I am moving back to California for political reasons and I smell opportunity as the clock counts down.

[lingerieLiz]

They do make men's V-neck tees. I guess I wouldn't fit into that group but I've heard similar comments from "the elite" people.

[kimdl93]

I think you salt with this about as well as you could. I don't think small town bigots should get a pass and you challenged her nonsense in a positive manner.

[JackieInPA]

Scared? WTF would people be scared of? Gods I hate stupid people!!!!

[noeleena]

Hi.

Hmmm interesting .

men should only wear mens clothes if they are ...born men.... gee that lets me off the hook then she an't met me then , i wonder what she would say about who i am as a person, being a little different , i wonder allso what then being some of us are more male looking than female yet are in fact female from birth, or others of us who are mixed, both male / female. lack of understanding, me thinks.

...noeleena...

[daviolin]

When will society ever grow up? Daviolin

[linda allen]

......The boss said I needed to change right away because I looked like a girl and employees customers were complaining. ................
It's pretty common for someone who is telling you to do something to hide behind the "several people were complaining" BS. They don't have the guts to tell you that they are the ones who are offended and they know that you can't disput the claim that someone complained.

I have even had web forum moderators tell me this (not here) when the people who were supposedly complaining had every opportunity to do it themselves on the forum.

PS: If you were there on your own time, not paid time, the boss had no right to complain about how you were dressed and you had every right to just leave.

[Dianne S]

She claimed the customers were scared by it

That seems really odd. I could imagine many reactions of people to a man wearing women's clothing, but being scared is certainly not one of them. I can see people being embarrassed, thinking it's funny, thinking it's ridiculous, thinking the guy actually looks pretty good... but not being scared.

[linda allen]

That seems really odd. I could imagine many reactions of people to a man wearing women's clothing, but being scared is certainly not one of them. .

Crossdressers are "perverts". Perverts are scary.

People are strange. Not all of them, but there are some pretty strange people out there and they are running around among us. I've known parents to teach their children to be scared of strangers, even to the point of screaming "stranger!" at the top of their lungs if someone they don't know speaks to them.

Many white people are scared of black people. No reason, they just are. Old people are scared of young people.

As I posted above, I think this is because the boss didn't have the guts to put take the responsibility personally.

[Karren H]

Sounds more like high school.... can't count the number of times I was sent home for not meeting dress codes! lol

[linda allen]

Sounds more like high school.... can't count the number of times I was sent home for not meeting dress codes! lol
I worked in a high school and they would send students home for violating the dress code and the parents would bring them back dressed worse than the students!

[Debra Russell]

Are your breasts protruding - moobs or larger than normal so a T-shirt of any kind would bring attention to them? if so their small minds might be offended - but still no reason to target you openly -- next time wear a bra - Dr. recomendation............................Debra

[vetobob9]

I was wearing a bra. I tried not wearing one and they still protrude but felt a bit saggy.
I am going to wear a gender neautral shirt today because it is very hot now summer is here. My only other guy shirt is a thick long black shirt which is not a good idea in 101 degree whether when I am both a cold weather and hot weather victim. I am not risking heat stroke for a bunch of bigots. The restaurant has no air conditioning and it Isis as hot inside the place as it is outside.

[Ressie]

The v neck draws attention to my breasts but I think my breasts would stick out slightly even in a crew neck.

That's vital information that was left out of the OP. I think we're missing more of the story too. But I love that no one noticed you were also wearing women's pants.

[boink]

She claims it should be illegal for men to go into any business wearing any article of women's clothing.
It was illegal for a long time.

Sorry to hear about your experience, hope things improve for you in moving to a new (and presumably more progressive) locale.

[Dianne S]

It was illegal for a long time.

Really? I guess it depends on where you live. I don't believe it was ever illegal in Canada (where I live.)

[nethiker55]

I wonder how often she wears jeans?

[Jessica Who]

Wow! That really sucks :(

[boink]

Really? I guess it depends on where you live. I don't believe it was ever illegal in Canada (where I live.)
Yeah, many cities in the US had municipal codes prohibiting wearing clothing of the opposite gender (passed between the 1800's and early 1900's). In fact police acting under those laws were what sparked the Stonewall Riots (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stonewall_riots).

Not sure about Canada, but my guess is that even if it wasn't specifically codified it's likely that crossdressing would have been considered under "gross indecency" or similar laws that were also used to prosecute homosexuals. But maybe Canada wasn't nearly as close-minded as the US (wouldn't shock me!).

[Lorileah]

When anyone starts telling me I need to conform to their ideologies I become a 2 year old..."why?" and when they answer "why?" and then "why? Hopefully they will suddenly realize that what they are saying does not make sense...if they don't..."why???"

[Dianne S]

Not sure about Canada, but my guess is that even if it wasn't specifically codified it's likely that crossdressing would have been considered under "gross indecency" or similar laws that were also used to prosecute homosexuals.

Possibly, though Wikipedia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clothing_laws_by_country#Canada) shows that "indecent acts" have to meet a pretty high bar in Canada.

[boink]

Possibly, though Wikipedia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clothing_laws_by_country#Canada) shows that "indecent acts" have to meet a pretty high bar in Canada.
Oh yeah, I'm positive that both the in US and Canada now no one could be prosecuted specifically for crossdressing, even in parts of the US where gender identity/expression isn't a protected category. Historically I have no idea how things would've been treated, though it wouldn't shock me if the standards were different in Canada (which has been traditionally a little more progressive).

Globally it's a different story.

[linda allen]

When anyone starts telling me I need to conform to their ideologies I become a 2 year old..."why?" and when they answer "why?" and then "why? Hopefully they will suddenly realize that what they are saying does not make sense...if they don't..."why???"

That might work with some people, but probably not with an experienced boss. Remember, this was not an even playing field.

[Darling Micki]

<quote>Yeah, many cities in the US had municipal codes prohibiting wearing clothing of the opposite gender (passed between the 1800's and early 1900's).</quote>

I remember hearing a story set around the start of the 20th century (either shortly before or after 1900) in which someone on a beach was ticketed for indecent exposure because they had chosen to go "topless" as they had done in Europe on the Riviera and along the Mediterranean. Pretty much the issuing cop just wanted the guy to put his swim shirt back on.

<Quote>She was talking about how men should only wear mens clothes if they are born as men.
That was just the tip of the ice berg dear sisters.
She claims it should be illegal for men to go into any business wearing any article of women's clothing. </Quote>

And my childish tongue would have shot back something along the lines of "I will, if you will" and then point to how Women's attire has morphed so much in the last 150 years, while men's clothing has kind of stalled.

<quote>I wonder how often she wears jeans? </quote> - Touchè

Either that or perhaps shown up in a kilt (saw a shirt recently that reported that "it's only a skirt if you wear something under your kilt").

Society Fears change, anything outside of it's nice & neat parameters is considered different, strange, unusual, and many other words found in the thesaurus under different.

I personally love to see the shocked expression on those around me when I'm out dressed. I've caught males (people I know) checking me out until they realize who it is, then they just shudder.

In my own opinion I think that those males that are the most homophobic are the ones that find out they were just checking out another male for sexual activities.
As for the GG's that feel men should wear only men's clothing I think they might be jealous of how good a CD can look compared to them or are homophobic in the regard that they don't want to think they might be attracted to another "Female", even though it's a male in "disguise."

*sigh*

<quote>When will society ever grow up? Daviolin </quote>

Regretfully not until it is forced too..

[monique01]

You should of told her as soon as women quit wearing mens clothes then you'd quit wearing womens clothes.