I had to tell my daughter!

[docrobbysherry]

Let me bring u up to date if u don't recall my situation. I began serious dressing only after my ex and I split up. The kids came over only on specified days and every other weekend. It was quite easy to organize my dressing sessions around that schedule. :)
And so it went for 15 years until my younger girl turned 18 last Fall and moved in with me FULL TIME!:doh:

This has played havoc with Sherry. Prepping for CD events required stealth, lying, and some very close calls at home. My routine of lengthy dressing sessions every 2 weeks ended in Oct., 2012!:sad:

Finally, I couldn't take all the lying and sneaking around anymore. I knew eventually I would be caught. Plus, I really need to dress privately at home once in a while. So, on Father's Day I told her. I asked her first if she wanted to know and could keep what I told her a secret? She said, "Yes", to both.

As expected, she asked no questions. So, I explained crossdressers, transexuals, and what I've been doing on my nites out and at the CD "conventions" I've gone to. I asked if she had any idea? She mentioned seeing masculine looking photos of women on our old computer. :o (That was maybe 5 years ago). And recently, she caught me making a mask mold in the garage. I told her about the masks, too. I said I had to tell her because I wanted to go out and meet others and to dress occasionally at home. I didn't want her to be "surprised".:eek:

How has it gone so far? We've made a few jokes about my "hobby". I told her I was going out Wed. nite to meet a CD for drinks and that I planned to dress yesterday afternoon. (My first full dressing session in a long time!) And, if she wanted to come home before dinner to call first! We call it "singing practice" in case we need to discuss it around others.:heehee:

She still hasn't asked any qwuestions and treats me just as before. (That means mostly ignoring me and anything I say to her).:straightface:

However, I feel a bit relieved about my dressing now. My bedroom is still a mess of ladies gear spread everywhere from yesterday. For the very first time, I'm NOT worried about her going upstairs and stumbling upon it. But, there is so much she still doesn't know. That I'm a "fetish" dresser. That I like to combine dressing with bondage. (My, "Perils of Sherry", pics and stories r posted on other sites). Or, what I wear, (mostly sexy, revealing outfits), or how Sherry actually looks? She doesn't even know my name is Sherry. Or, that Sherry has her own Facebook page with over 300 followers and 1000 Friends.:daydreaming:

Never mind my fem silicone prosthesis. Which many folks find creepy!:brolleyes:

She doesn't need, or want, to know those things and I don't need to tell her. Rite now, it's a day at time. So far so good. We'll see how it goes from here?:straightface:

[Karren H]

great fathers day present for you Sherry! I'm afraid she wouldn't understand the silicone suit... lol

[Tracii G]

Best of luck with it Sherry just roll with it thats about all you can do at this point.

[StacyPump]

Good for you to be so honest with your daughter, Sherry. I agree that she does not need to know all the gritty details at this point. What's important is that you are being honest about who you are, and I think she will respect that. The bonus for you, is that you don't have to live in fear any more.

Good luck!
--Stacy

[Persephone]

Congratulations! I know you have been dreading this for some time and now the air is clear.

I have been honored to have met your daughter, Sherry, and she seems to be a very lovely woman.

Children have certain images of the their parents, views and expectations that they developed in childhood, and it is difficult for them to discover that their parent has a side that they were unaware of. The result is that it is a complex adjustment that will take time. She will have to adapt at her own pace.

Meanwhile, it is appropriate for you too to fullly enjoy your own life, but with the sort of sensitivity that you have already shown to her needs and expectations.

Let her come to accept Sherry on her own terms.

Hugs,
Persephone.

[Alice B]

Sherry,

That is great.I know how worried you were about her finding out and your having to sneak to the back house to get ready. It has to be a major burden taken away. We need to get together.

Alice

[boink]

Congrats!

And being out doesn't mean that everything about you has to be open and fair game to everyone.

To me, though, the biggest benefit to being out (even somewhat) to the people I know is that it makes for a lot less expended energy (physical and mental) on keeping things hidden. That alone is worth the price of admission.

[CONSUELO]

I'm glad to hear that it is working well so far and I hope that it continues that way. Don't be embarrassed about fetish dressing or combining dressing with bondage. I do that myself. From conversations with friendly doms, it seems that it is common. Young people are very open about a range of behaviors and preferences. Sorry to hear that she still is not listening to you but that is not uncommon either. Best wishes and good luck with everything.

[Barbara Ella]

Good for you and your daughter. She sounds like a well grounded teenager, if such a thing exists. Enjoy your peace of mind, and just be honest, because they will have questions when you least expect or need it....

Barbara

[Marleena]

Well Sherry I think it was for the best. It also sounds like she's taking it well. I think it's probably less is better in your case. She knows now so no sense going into details. It has to be a relief for you.:)

[sandra-leigh]

Finally, I couldn't take all the lying and sneaking around anymore.

Right there is the #1 reason that my wife now knows: because the lying, creative omissions, misdirections, and sneaking around, were making me sick (in a literal sense.)

[Audrey34]

Good luck Sherry! Hoping everything will turn out well!
-Audrey

[Rogina B]

I think a whole lot more of you now that you are being honest with her about your addiction! lol But the mask and silly suit..I am not sure on that! How many pieces did you have to cut up your Mary burger to get it through the hole in the mask?

[PretzelGirl]

I am glad that you got it off your chest and it went well. Slow and steady she goes and like you said, she doesn't need to know everything. Unless you plan on taking her to SCC or DLV that is.... :D

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Sherry, She sounds like a great level headed girl hope that everything works out for you.

[Eryn]

Sherry, sounds like it went very well for you! Congratulations!

[Raychel]

That is awesome Sherry, I just recently told everyone here that needs to know. It is such a huge relief not to have to hide anymore.
Here I sit out on the deck cruising the forum and not afraid that someone will see me.

Congrats on a huge step Sherry.

[Lucy_Bella]

Let me bring u up to date if u don't recall my situation. I began serious dressing only after my ex and I split up. The kids came over only on specified days and every other weekend. It was quite easy to organize my dressing sessions around that schedule. :)
And so it went for 15 years until my younger girl turned 18 last Fall and moved in with me FULL TIME!:doh:


Sherry same thing happened to me and my daughter but it wasn't 15 years,she choose dad over mom when she could at 18 ...EXCEPT.. Then daughter got knocked up before moving in with dad then daughter asked if new BF could move in also.. Then we out grew the apartment place because of new grand baby had to move ( sooner than I wanted)..Then daughter got knocked up again Dad in-law had to kick start new son in-law to find job to support his family himself and not dad..Then dad finds son in-law a job so new family can get their own place and let dad have own life back so dad moves them out..Then son in-law blows lots of money and family loses place after 6 months and has to move back home with dad and have been for over 9 months..

Yeah I think you got it right Sherry and happy belated fathers day, great job on raising your daughter ..I just wanted mine to go to college before she started a family :) no regrets tho love them grand babies..

[Di]

So glad you told her..... much better her finding out this way AND happy it went well hon:hugs::hugs:

[Beverley Sims]

I think you have the handle on it, no need for advice here, no need to weird others out and all the best with your future relationship with your daughter.
When she asks questions tell her the interesting bits, only.

[docrobbysherry]

Thanks for all your thotful and encouraging posts! It has taken me 15+ years to come the distance Sherry and I have come. I don't expect things to change for myself and my daughter overnite. I believe we both prefer baby steps.


That is awesome Sherry, I just recently told everyone here that needs to know. It is such a huge relief not to have to hide anymore.
Here I sit out on the deck cruising the forum and not afraid that someone will see me.

Congrats on a huge step Sherry.
Speaking of decks, Raychel, the house next door just sold. It appears the new neighbors r: younger, social, and use their 2nd story deck that overlooks a portion of my back yard and pool, than the previous occupants. But, that's an entirely different subject.


I am glad that you got it off your chest and it went well. Slow and steady she goes and like you said, she doesn't need to know everything. Unless you plan on taking her to SCC or DLV that is.... :D
Interestingly, Sue, my older daughter lives in Vegas with her family. She knows I dress but not what I was doing in Vegas in April when I ditched DLV for one nite with them. What will I do next year?


I think a whole lot more of you now that you are being honest with her about your addiction! lol But the mask and silly suit..I am not sure on that! How many pieces did you have to cut up your Mary burger to get it through the hole in the mask?
While I prefer to appear as Sherry when I dress, Rogina, I'm NOT fond of freaking folks out. So, when I'm out with "the girls" I generally go out as myself in consideration of their feelings as well as the muggles. However, I like to carry Sherry in my purse------ just in case!

[Ressie]

It appears that you don't know how she feels about this since she isn't saying much. Hopefully the confession will enrich your relationship and she'll be more open to you (some day) with her secrets.

[flatlander_48]

I'm glad that you took the initiative to explain what your situation is. As we've seen here MANY times, when things blow up due to unintended discovery it is very hard right the ship. People don't readily share this part of their lives because they worried that their lives and relationships will change in some very negative ways. Unfortunately it is unpredictable as to how this will go, but it's certainly clear that it is hard to recover from blow ups. Sadly, Very Hard...

[kimdl93]

Well, that has to be a relief. I had much the same situation a couple of years ago. I came home after a night out and my step daughter, who lived with us for a while after college came in right behind me. So I had some explaining to do. She did ask a few questions and since then I've met several of her friends whilst en femme. Kids these days are remarkably accepting of gender variations, it seems.

[Annaliese2010]

I think you did the right thing. Kids are hip, understanding, accepting nowadays...and so like 'whatever'. After all these years I never knew much about you Sherry, but always thought of you as quite edgy though. Call it my intuition. Glad to read your post. Kudos!

Caveat: However IMHO...don't think you need to nor should inform her of more detail. She doesn't need to be aware of the full dimensions of your lifestyle. In fact, to make those details explicit to an 18 y/o...kind of crosses a line. Not a criticism...just an opinon. Again...bravo to how you handled it!

P.S. However there is nooo way a teenager's gonna keep Anything 'secret'. It's against their nature. Don't worry....doesn't matter.

[Melisamy]

You did the right thing. I am out to both of my daughters, one supports it the other ignores it. In the long run I think this will make things way easier for you. I have a rule, I never tell anyone about Missy unless its going to benefit Missy. I think telling your daughter will benefit Sherry. Well done ! \

Melisa Amy Ellis

[Sara Jessica]

Kudos to you my friend!!! :hugs:

I see a lot of detail in your disclosure in our conversations to & from Vegas. I'd like to think that my advice helped but at the end of the day, you are the one who did what needed to be done.

I think this thread should be kept alive periodically by your posting of any developments on this front. You mentioned your daughter not asking you a whole lot but that doesn't mean there's not a bunch of stuff going around her head which is likely to emerge eventually. Best of luck to you and like Alice said, we gotta get together...all of us!