Pride.

[Greenie]

So I went to Pride Fest this weekend in Seattle Wa. I had an absolute BLAST. I went with a group of girlfriend friends who are all lesbian, one straight girl and myself. Before you ask, Luca did not come. We are early on in this journey and he did not come. To tell you the truth I do not know why now that I think about it.

I was walking down the roads and there were thousands of people. Men in dresses, drag queens, TG, lesbians and gays. People dressed as everything you could imagine.

There was so much acceptance. I was sitting and watching the parade. I got teary eyed when the section of the parade that was the "recently married" couples walked. They had signs of how long they had been together. There was a little car of these two sweet old lesbians who had been together for 50 years, who FINALLY could get married.

I have an immense love of drag queens. They are so dramatic and elaborate. I talked with one for a couple minutes and complimented her dress.

I also saw the Emerald City Social club float and was wondering if any of you ladies were on it? I swear I had seen one of two of those faces before.

There were a lot of Fetish floats in the parade. Leather, whips, master and puppy or master and horse, Goth's, vampirism. This I thought was interesting, but then I realized, even if most of the people who enjoy that fetish are straight, this is probably the only open place they can express themselves. Amongst the LGBTQ community.

When thinking back on it. I don't really think I saw that many TG/CD folks. A lot of gay men, and a bunch of lesbians. In the scope of things it caused me to wonder.

Do more people pass then we have come to believe? Or are TG folks highly underrepresented? I guess I know there is a larger gay/lesbian population than TG. Is being gay or lesbian becoming more mainstream while being TG is something that's still a little too taboo even for pride?

Have any of you been to a festival like this? Would you participate? Any thoughts on the lack of TG people matter? I wanted to badly to tell everyone I saw, "I accept you!" and give them a hug. It was overwhelming actually. Maybe thoughts on why I wanted to desperately to find a Tgirl to talk to?

I wish luca would have come. He could have worn whatever he wanted and no one would have judged. I feel like it would have been such a good experience for him. Maybe next year.

[Jenniferathome]

...When thinking back on it. I don't really think I saw that many TG/CD folks. A lot of gay men, and a bunch of lesbians. In the scope of things it caused me to wonder.

Do more people pass then we have come to believe? Or are TG folks highly underrepresented? I guess I know there is a larger gay/lesbian population than TG. Is being gay or lesbian becoming more mainstream while being TG is something that's still a little too taboo even for pride?

Kae, I definitely tink it is the latter. Cross dressing is where homosexuality was in the 70's. It's known, not talked about, a weird, but "whatever as long as I don't see it," kind of vibe.

[Wildaboutheels]

Never been to one Greenie but they showed clips this weekend on my local news about the St Pete [other side of the bay] Pride event this weekend. Not sure but I think they have an event there every year. There were all manner and looks and styles and almost anything one could imagine They gave an estimate that 150K turned out and that was with some really lousy [for Florida] weather.

[Greenie]

Cross dressing is where homosexuality was in the 70's.

Do you think it also might have to do with the fact that Pride is about being out and proud about being gay...... When most CDers are heterosexual I would expect there not to be a bunch of CDers at a gay pride parade. If they are not gay would they be like 'Straight pride! But in a dress!" ??

I think there also is some judgment even from the LGB side of the equation because they think its only a matter of time before CDers "come out" as being gay. And then the TG think that CDers are either like them or its a fetish.

Poor CDers don't fit anywhere... Maybe that's why their were not many?

[Ellanore G.G.]

Have never been either, maybe I will go next year.
Have to say many moons back I was convinced my H was the only c/d in the world.
I had heard of drag queens, and believed they done it for a laugh, or a show.
And maybe because a lot have not even come out to their wives ?
Glad you had a blast.

[VickysBFF]

Hi Greenie: I have been to several Pride celebrations in cities across America; some in drab and some en femme. All have been interesting and I did not have any bad experiences at any of them.
Unfortunately, when I was living in Vancouver, WA I did not get up to Seattle for Pride although I wanted to. I went to Portland Pride 2 years in a row and enjoyed that and there was a decent presence of TG/CD folks there. Probably the best Pride celebration that I have been to was in San Diego. Good sized, a lot of fun and a very wide variety of folks across the LGBT spectrum. One event that my SO and I really enjoyed was a presentation on gender that was part of the BDSM/leather community. A really interesting talk by the presenter and again a wide variety of attendees.
I hope that you can convince your SO to go next year. I encourage people that I talk to on this board to go to Pride if at all possible because it is one of the most accepting venues and doesn't require any additional commitment.

[Beverley Sims]

You have summed it up.
A good event but for Luca,
Maybe next year.

[CynthiaD]

I wouldn't be interested in attending such an event, because I'm not gay. I don't feel any animosity toward the gay and lesbian crowd, but I don't feel any particular kinship with them either. To me, being transgendered is not a sexual thing. It concerns only how I perceive myself.

[Lorileah]

Luca will be more comfortable in time. She will go to Pride with you in the future. As you say you are new to all this and you should not jump into the deep end (however going in more androgynous clothing may have been OK).

As far as not seeing any (or few) TGs, look at the site and how many are even reticent to be here, where they could be anonymous. Many in the TG community don't want anything to do with the LGBT movement. They are still scared to be out in public. They are scared to be out to their SOs, jus think what would happen if they saw a neighbor or boss. They might be considered "gay" (NB being gay is not a bad hing, my boyfriends have all been gay but it still holds a stigma in plain vanilla world most CDs live in) This is unfortunate because groups like the River City Gems carry our banner with pride showing that everyday people are part of the TG community. Did you happen to see if there was anything on the news that night about Pride? Did they show the loving families? the 50 yrs together couple? the accepting churches? If they showed anything at all related to the TG community it was the Drag Queen with bad hair and make up wearing an outfit that would have been banned in most places. So in a way, can you blame the majority here with NOT wanting to be seen there?

I went to Pride here. I was dressed casually (some call it soccer mom). I walked in the gate...walked through the gathering, visited a few friends and walked out. Why? Because 90% o the people there were almost naked, had too much to drink and most could not tell you what issues the gay community has been working on or (and this is a question for the members here too) why the parade is in June. It has become basically a Mardis Gras (and 90% of the participants in that don't know why it is in February).

I support Pride, I think it is great that people can have some fun. I feel I have out grown the party part though. So why didn't you see many TGs? They probably stayed home with family and had a nice weekend.

[Luna Nyx]

i went in androgynous mode to our pride even in ohio and had a blast. I talked to alot of other cross dressers and trans people. I even went out to a local bar and ran into a "girl" there. she was so cute. she was trying to get the bar tenders attention but couldnt. I flagged him down for her and i said very loudly " she was here first" she looked up at me and smiled big. I later talked to her and she was a very nice person. i told her it was my first time out and she was super supportive. I just wish i could remember her name. ill be going back out this weekend.

[Jenniferathome]

Do you think it also might have to do with the fact that Pride is about being out and proud about being gay...... When most CDers are heterosexual I would expect there not to be a bunch of CDers at a gay pride parade. If they are not gay would they be like 'Straight pride! But in a dress!" ??

i think that is true. we are not "gay" and we are just on the outside. it is what it is.

[PaulaQ]

Kae, my first thought upon reading your questions about TG people in the pride parade is "well how does she know she didn't see many?" Because for many the goal is to pass, even at an event like a pride parade.

[2B Natasha]

Hi Greenie

I was there. With my wife. It was a bit tame this year, but still. IIIII LOOVVVVEEEDD IT! Sat in the sun just outside the Ace hardware and their parking garage. Sat with the nicest couple from Maple Valley. Never met them. They just sat down and we talked for 3+ hours. It was there first parade. I hope they had a good time. They hugged both of us when we all left. There was also a gat couple and their dog Dozer. Woot Woot!. Just for future reference. We are going to move down the street to right in front of the Ace hardware store next year. We are bring the fixings for Mimosas. Saving a little area around our little enclave to watch and wait for you and yours to show up. We hope the couple from Maple Valley show again. Never got there phone number but hope to pop up on some facial recognition software so I can get a picture of them. Did you see the big bald Swag seller. He was yelling out. " GET YOUR GAY STUFF " My wife had to buy a necklace that was disco balls in the rainbow colors.

I think Lynn was supposed to be on the Emerald City Social float. But I didn't see here there.

Do more pass. Nah. I think they just don't show up. WHY? I have no idea. I look for them to. Hardly ever see any that are trying to look female. I see several all the time that dress like, well, trashy trash. In your face stuff. Regardless. I think it's a hoot.

Are we taboo to the pride festival? Nope. We are our own worst enemies. It's ll in our heads.

I think in general the TG and the CD folk where VERY under represented this year. I noticed that there was only about half of the queens that there usually are. Not sure where they went. Perhaps the heat was just to much. I had to put my hair up for must of the day as it was just to hot.

To bad you didn't find me. We will be there next year. SO bring your bad self and Luca. IN either mode. We'll split a Mimosa or three. Dozen. Heck. That goes for anyone that is in town that weekend. Come on by. I'll probable have the TG flag flying so people can find us.

BTW. Did you go to the March on Capital hill for the Trans community? We couldn't make it there this year. We hope to next year.

PS. Girl. We have GOT to go out together some time the four of us.

PSS. Super cute new photo in your avatar.

Cheers!

Lori

I had that same conversation with one of my bosses the other day. What is Pride about now a days that DOMA is all but dead and in Washington you can get married. He didn't have a direct answer. This is a gentlemen that sit's on the international pride committee. Wish I could be co-herent with this conversation. Basically. The gist was that the TGBL community needs to focus on the international aspect. While some states might not be the most progressive they are literally centuries ahead of many other countries around the world. He to feels that it is turning into a summer party with no real direction anymore.

Cheers

[Alice Torn]

I am just not a big crowd, or group think person. I don't like the "pride" word either. Pride goes before a fall often. I know it is weird, but, humbleness is a true virtue, not pride. I am glad there was no violence or incidents. I am such an individualist, and independent contrarian, that parades don't do anything for me. I am for freedom, though.

[2B Natasha]

Alice. I won't mince words here. I respect you for you and wish upon you all the happiness the world can bring. BUT. Using THAT definitions to state that you are not for pride but humbleness is a bit of the pot calling the kettle black. I have read your posts about your life situation and how who deal of choose not to deal with it. So I chuckle to myself a out your answer. Clearly you misunderstand pride and how it's used on this day.

[Alice Torn]

Natasha, I think most people are tired and worn out from the P word. I think it is time to find a better word, though it is not easy. Acceptance is a good one. I think Pride, is kind of "in your face." Just my humble , oddball opinion.

[Annaliese2010]

... When thinking back on it. I don't really think I saw that many TG/CD folks. A lot of gay men, and a bunch of lesbians. In the scope of things it caused me to wonder... Do more people pass then we have come to believe? Or are TG folks highly underrepresented? I guess I know there is a larger gay/lesbian population than TG. Is being gay or lesbian becoming more mainstream while being TG is something that's still a little too taboo even for pride?That was cool to read Greenie!! Makes me realize that yeah, I would attend such a thing IF such a thing happened here. But in Detroit, MI? Huh? OMG...LOL...I doubt it. Sooo.... Anyways... my response to your query? Is....no I don't think it's 'cause so many of us 'pass' and thus fly beneath the radar, unnoticed. I think the latter...that which you stated, alternatively surmised, is true. Which is to say how we are THE minority.

A minority within a plethora of minorities. The final proving-ground, if you will. The ultimate. The passionate. The few who, by our very nature, push the envelope's edge. Challenging all the rest. Just by BEING who we ARE we cross boundaries. Blur borders. Are a complex collage of wonder. We live, harmlessly. We love. Sensitive to EVrything. We bloom. We're like no other. Nature's exception to the 'golden rule'.

Still God's children. Precious & few. Oft treated cruel...and yet we stand out proud & pretty. Do what we do. Value added if only others would accept us, including many in the LGTBQ. For THIS is what it's like to be the arrow. The pointing edge. Breaking ice wherever we go. No WONDER we're so focused on 'looks' and 'passing'. I submit, never has there been a group more persecuted. So self-doubting. But then as well, Never has there been a gender more forward looking. WE are the ultimate fashion. The famous freedom. Ultimate challenge to the U.S Constitution.

IF as it is thus stated, that the purpose of life is to form a more pure and perfect Union (a principle echoed also in the inmost precepts of Christian religion) then we can take joy and consolation in the fact that, by us being who we simply, beautifully, naturally ARE (at birth w/o choice) we serve the Greater Good. Leading the way, on the high-road of life. WE'RE not wrong (nah-uh). It's just that we're ahead of our time. Setting a standard that Society has to catch-up to.

Someday (sigh...)

[kimdl93]

I think Jennifer hit it right with the notion that many CDrs are straight and don't feel connected to those of us who see ourselves as TG. I happen to think most CDrs belong under the TG umbrella, but don't want to engage in that argument. Still, I haven't been out to such an event...although I'm out pretty much every day. I certainly wouldn't pass and might even be more conspicuous in a TG parade where people were expecting the 6'3 person to be TG. I honestly think it would be a blast just being out and "really out" at the same time.

[Alice Torn]

I am just one who is kind of afraid, when anything gets too big and powerful, even our movement.

[Missy Tanya]

I was there with a friend from this forum. We stood right in the middle of a large crowd and nobody said anything against us. Walked all around Seattle Center after the parade and even got some good compliments. I saw many sisters and some want-to-be's with mustache or two day old growth. I know of many sisters that did go, but I never seen them, then again it was crowded. I bit hot for this old gal and the wig didn't help much either.

I think the Emerald City Float was one of the prettiest. Didn't see Lynn either but she was in a picture in the paper setting it up. So she was somewhere in the background..

[AmyGaleRT]

Greenie, I was at Denver PrideFest, in full Amy-mode: my pink Victorian lace dress from HolyClothing, my jeweled Lane Bryant sandals, and my hat that I added the pink bow to. I found it to be very female-empowering. I attracted some attention, of course. several people complimented me on my dress, several wanted to take pictures with me, some gave me hugs. Two guys stopped me as I was walking down one of the rows of booths; one complimented my looks and gave me a hug, then told his friend, "Look at her, isn't she gorgeous? Come over here, she needs a hug." I could feel my estrogen levels rising. :) But, most importantly, I was accepted throughout as Amy.

Hopefully I can spend more time at next year's. :)

- Amy

[Greenie]

Lots of interesting responses. :) I saw that some of my thoughts created an idea for another thread. How exciting! :)

I guess pride was something in the end that was more for me than luca anyway. I am Bi and many of my friends are lesbians. It was touching to me to see all the older married couples. I am fortunate that luca and I can get married. There is nothing against him and I getting married, even if he CD's. But if I was with a woman instead I would have had a lot of hard times ahead of me, well up until recently. (yay Washington and gay marriage)

@lorileah That makes a lot of sense. News is skewed that way in general. So I am sure that grouping isn't something that CDers would want to be included in.

@ paula, I wouldn't know that's why the first question is do more people pass than I think. not to be mean. But if this website is an indicator of how many people pass...... in my opinion its not many. Many of you ladies try really hard... But I can pretty much always tell. Sometimes I am fooled. So I guess I was assuming a similar representation of passing there, to here?

@ Natasha: see I am not crazy. way less TG than you would expect. Something about this year I guess.
@amy HOW SWEET. :) I like that story.

[docrobbysherry]

I had some gay guy friends in Laguna Beach back in the day. They made it a point to look and act like everyone else out in public. In fact, I was told that overtly gay drag queen types were NOT welcome in their group of friends.

So, watching freak show Pride parades in the news has always reminded me of them and how they wouldn't approve.:sad:

Just a few weeks ago, I was invited to ride on a CD/Tgirl float in an LA Pride parade. At first, I was excited about going and being involved in the carnival atmosphere. Then, I had second thots. Because for MANY dressers, it's NOT about fun! I began feeling guilty about going.

Not sure if this is a common issue for other dressers or it's just mine?:straightface:

[Alice Torn]

I hear you Doc Sherry. Mixed feelings, not into group think, either.

[dawnmarrie1961]

Your post made me realize how much I missed my friends in Omaha Nebraska. The church I went to there had a float in the annual Pride Parade. Which I got to ride on. It was fun!
I haven't had time to get active in the TG community down here in Arlington, Texas. Too much going on right now. Maybe someday.

[Phoebe]

Helped staff the City of Lakes Crossgender Community booth, PrideFest Minneapolis, MN at Loring Park on Sunday June 30th.

Booth photo:
http://i1141.photobucket.com/albums/n594/Janet_CD/8e452568-cc86-46d1-b40c-781b9ea6d422_zpsa2935700.jpg (http://s1141.photobucket.com/user/Janet_CD/media/8e452568-cc86-46d1-b40c-781b9ea6d422_zpsa2935700.jpg.html)

Mari on left, Zoe on right staffing the CLCC booth.

Main banner photo:
http://i1141.photobucket.com/albums/n594/Janet_CD/WhatisgenderatPride2013_zps85620945.jpg (http://s1141.photobucket.com/user/Janet_CD/media/WhatisgenderatPride2013_zps85620945.jpg.html)



The main banner was a great way for people to step up and ask "What is Gender?" Printed information was on the table for people to take with them.

Also the "Wheel of Fabulousity", How fabulous you really are after spinning the wheel, was also a great interaction for people to ask questions and try the wheel for fun. Estimated 1000 spins of the wheel over the weekend.
http://i1141.photobucket.com/albums/n594/Janet_CD/WheeloffabulousityPride2013_zps6c51d37b.jpg (http://s1141.photobucket.com/user/Janet_CD/media/WheeloffabulousityPride2013_zps6c51d37b.jpg.html)

Estimated crowd at PrideFest Minneapolis over the weekend was about one half million attending. With the "Freedom to Marry" bill passage this year, Pride was the celebration of the passage of that statute.

Phoebe

[Launa]

Do you think it also might have to do with the fact that Pride is about being out and proud about being gay...... When most CDers are heterosexual I would expect there not to be a bunch of CDers at a gay pride parade. If they are not gay would they be like 'Straight pride! But in a dress!" ??

I think there also is some judgment even from the LGB side of the equation because they think its only a matter of time before CDers "come out" as being gay. And then the TG think that CDers are either like them or its a fetish.


Poor CDers don't fit anywhere... Maybe that's why their were not many?

I think theres not a lot of representation from the CD community in Pride events because I'm sure over 90% of us are all hiding in the damn closet.

Things might be different if CDer's were attracted to each other and wanted to marry each other with equal rights etc.

I will be going in a parade one of these days!

[Evie08]

Greenie,

There were a number of forum members on that Emerald City float. One of our regular contributors "Lynn Marie" was riding shotgun in the pickup that was towing the float. And to Natasha, thank you for being there 5 years ago - getting me out for the first time.
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