Went to Walmart en femme tonight

[PaulaQ]

Yep, in the neighboring tiny little town. It's, I dunno, 3500 people. It was the first time I'd been to this Walmart en femme. I go other places en femme all the time now. And I had the exact same experience I have everyplace else I've gone - women smile at me when I smile at them (this is one of my favorite things about women), and people were friendly.

I bought some stuff from the pharmacy, and a replacement lip liner crayon, because mine ran out today. It was a good opportunity to practice my voice - which needs lots o' practice.

I also noticed that I still don't give a darn what other people think. Apparently not one iota - even still.

Tomorrow I'll probably go to the mall and get my eyebrows threaded, and a red white and blue manicure / pedicure for the holiday. Maybe to Lane Bryant to exchange some stuff.

At this point, friends and family are mostly MUCH more nervous about me going out en femme than I am. I figure - if I am going to live this way, there is no "safe". There's just the world we live in.

My cover is about to be blown here anyway, and I'm tired of leading a double life, in any case. So I just don't think I'm going to do that anymore. I'll move soon anyway. (And once I do, it will be a rare day indeed when I dress en drab.)

The point of this story? I don't know - there isn't one I guess, just how I feel.

[stacycoral]

Good for you girl!!!! hugs.

[Leah Lynn]

Paula, I'm pretty sure that as I read this, I heard the soundtrack; Sammy Davis, Jr., singing "I Gotta Be Me"!

You go girl!
Leah

[Leona]

My cover is about to be blown here anyway, and I'm tired of leading a double life, in any case. So I just don't think I'm going to do that anymore. I'll move soon anyway. (And once I do, it will be a rare day indeed when I dress en drab.)

Can't you just feel how wonderful it will be to dress in drab and still be a woman? :)

I figure as long as I don't get read as a Person of Walmart, I'm doing fine. If I *do* get read that way (or know that I will), then I need to double down on the act and rock the Person of Walmart look.

[Cynthia Anne]

Hooray for Paula! As Leah Lynn was listening to Sammy Davis I heard Charlie Daniels singing ''If you don't like the way I'm LIVEN' than you leave this long haired country [boy] GIRL ALONE''!!!

[PaulaQ]

I guess the main thing I'd point out is that my join date is February of this year. I've gone from being totally in the closet, and in denial, to being out and about and unafraid of dressing en femme. (My mom observed this weekend that my eye makeup is MUCH better than hers.) Sure, I'm trans, and I'll transition, hopefully starting HRT shortly after my wife and I separate. (We'll divorce soon too.)

I'd like to attribute this to bravery, but it really isn't that, I don't think. It's just that there is nothing the world can do to me - call me names or break my bones - that will make me feel worse than I feel as a man. So it's pretty simple to feel OK when I'm out.

[AmyGaleRT]

Wonderful news, Paula! I've been to Walmarts in the area several times, both alone and with Sabrina, and haven't had any trouble. I dress a little nicer than the "People of Walmart," anyway. ;)

- Amy

[Sandieland]

Paula, you're gorgeous! I've got a ways to go before I can venture out like that (no proper clothes and my makeup skills still suck), but there's a Walmart across the way from where I live and now I'm going to keep my eye on it. I have started buying my cosmetics there and get no double takes when checking out (at least that I can see...lol). Anyway, I can't wait to hear more about your adventures in the future.

[Leona]

Wonderful news, Paula! I've been to Walmarts in the area several times, both alone and with Sabrina, and haven't had any trouble. I dress a little nicer than the "People of Walmart," anyway. ;)

- Amy

That's NOT hard to do. :) But I do feel very strongly that if you're going to be a Person of Walmart, you need to rock that look.

[Beverley Sims]

It is good to get out but never thow caution to the wind, it can be a cruel world out there.

[PaulaQ]

But I do feel very strongly that if you're going to be a Person of Walmart, you need to rock that look.

Well, what *I* like about Walmart is that you can go all casual, y'know? Like you can put on your ratty old "walk around in the yard doing yardwork" flip-flops, instead of your good "going to church on sunday flip-flops". I think that's real nice.


Paula, you're gorgeous!
Thanks Sandie, I really appreciate that! *blush* As far as buying cosmetics go - nobody cares what you buy in Walmart. In fact, almost nobody notices you in Walmart. All people think about in Walmart is either "OMG, I'm in Walmart, get me out of here", or "mmmm... cheetos." Just an FYI. ;)

[Cheryl123]

Good for you, Paula (and yes you do look gorgeous). I think you've been through some difficult times, but I can sense the happiness in you words now. Maybe the point of your story is to celebrate your new live, living as who you've always been. And I do know what you mean by saying you don't give a darn what people think. You get so tired of living the double life, of hiding your true self, of not being you, there does come a point when you say to h*ll with it. Good luck. I'm so happy for you.

[Angela Campbell]

MMMMMMM cheetos......oh gosh how many calories? OMG! Where is the makeup section?

[kimdl93]

I think the point is you have outgrown your fears or need for alibis. You're out. Good for you!

[Badtranny]

Congratulations Paula, you've come a long way. I like this new Paula much better. :-)

[TeresaCD]

I'd like to attribute this to bravery, but it really isn't that, I don't think. It's just that there is nothing the world can do to me - call me names or break my bones - that will make me feel worse than I feel as a man. So it's pretty simple to feel OK when I'm out.

Way to go, Paula. Well done.

[PaulaQ]

Well, I have to admit that the Walmarts in rural Oklahoma are easy places to pass - pretty much anyone without a 'Duck Dynasty' style beard is assumed to be female. You can imagine the embarrassment and confusion this causes sometimes on a first date... ;)

A brief side note about what was almost Carrie Underwood's Walmart, and a brief apology to Mikey Cyrus:

Dear Miley,

Please forgive me for complaining about your giant sign in the Walmart. It was up for months, and during the cold dreary winter months it kind of pissed me off that you were always up there, 15' tall, and just super perky! Plus, I thought your Dad's music sucked. Little did I know, though, that you'd be replaced by the hideous 'Duck Dynasty' dudes, who sell stuff that just can't be helpful for hunting. (Duck Dynasty logo lingerie? Really? Really?)

Come back to me baby, I'll never complain again, I promise.

[Leona]

Am I the only one that's noticed that as soon as people drive into the WalMart parking lot, they turn into (and mods, please forgive me for this, for I have no other way of saying this), they turn into complete ASSHOLES?

It's weird, because on the street they'll be fine. They'll yield and even let you hit the walmart driveway first. But then they're behind you and they're just honking their horns and trying to pass you. And when you go inside, it's even worse! Look out for the smiley faces, because under it are a bunch of cheapskates fighting over a pair of stockings nobody actually wants!

Pure materialism.

I have to do walmart as hit and run, or else I just get really annoyed. I have been known to push cars when I was parallel parked, but luckily it hasn't come to that at walmart.

Definitely a good place to out yourself. Nobody cares, they're too busy spending money they don't have on stuff they don't need.

[AmyGaleRT]

Leona, this is why Sabrina prefers to go to Walmart late at night...fewer people, less traffic! Of course, then you have to contend with the obstacle course of pallets and boxes as they restock... ;)

- Amy

[Leona]

Back when Walmart was 24 hours, I used to go at 2-3am. No traffic at all, the night stocking was usually over, and the few sales people that were around knew the whole store forwards and backwards because they had nothing better to do than wander around looking for stuff. That was also when I wore women's pants all the time because they just didn't make men's pants that worked for me. Now they do, and it's much harder to find women's pants that work for me (pockets being the biggest problem, I like deep pockets).

Coincidentally, parking was usually easier, but the syndrome was still active, so beware the other late night shoppers! It was kind of like walking around on a Borg ship. I'm convinced the Borg cube was modeled after Walmart.

[Tasha_Yar]

Well, as Tasha Yar, it's pretty obvious I'm a Star Trek fan, so Leona's reference to the Borg caught my eye. A fantastic comparison. I simply won't go to Walmart anytime, no matter how dressed. When I'm fully en-femme I like places like Lane Bryant (As most of us do) because they see CD's all the time and treat us as regular customers. For example, last year i went to Lane Bryant to pick up a special order bra. A 42H I had ordered for a huge set of forms I'd ordered in a weak moment from the Glamour Boutique. The SA politely remarked that she had never seen a bra that large in real life. I told her that I had ordered huge breastforms and they needed one this large. She asked if i could do her a favor, and wear the new forms next time i was shopping. She worked weekends. So, I said yes, and did next weekend. We chatted and went to lunch together on her break. She was about 22-24 and really wanted to talk about cross dressing. Inn a very nice, sincerely interested way. Turns out her BF likes to wear her bra and panties, and she wanted to talk about it with somebody as she was nervous he was gay or something. I think I made her comfortable on that point, and told her to just enjoy it, and maybe offer to "fix his (non-existent) makeup. She laughed, and said that would be fun. Hope it all works out for them.