How much does your SO know about your dressing?

[Polka Dot]

So, Gurls.. Tell me. How much does your SO know about your femme self and your dressing? I am interested in if it's a completely hidden thing, or she knows everything about your girly self. Mayhaps categories would help:

1. Do they know you dress?

2. Have they seen you dress?

3. Do they know your femme persona?

4. Have you gone out together when dressed?

5. Have you shopped together for Gurl clothes?

6. Have they seen / watched your porn collection?

I look forward to hearing your answers to these questions! :D

[ArleneRaquel]

My SO is a male, but I will still jump in.
1.Yes of course
2.Yes many times
3.Of course
4.No, not even as boy & boy
5. Yes, but he didn't shop for himself
6.I do not own a porn collection
Now insofar as my late wife who died in 2002....

1.Not as far as I know
2.No
3.No
4.No
5.I went out with here many times as she shopped and I looked on. I shoped alone for female item many times during our marriage
6.No porn-ever

I do not beleive that my wife ever knew, even though I took part in many Gay Pride Parades and activities thru out our marraige usually when she was visiting her family in Missouri, or Mississippi. I never cheated on my wife in any way. I did not have my first same gender experience until I was 58 years old or thereabouts. I began taking part in the Gay Parade in around 1974/75 as "Maureen Fleming."

[Polka Dot]

Thanks for the heads-up, Arlene. I changed the pronouns to be gender-inclusive.

[ArleneRaquel]

Thank you darlin. Hugs, Kisses, and Best Wishes.

[jaye_cd]

Yes x6.

I'm not sure that would indicate she knows everything about my femme side, but it is quite a bit.

Caveat to #6: It's either straight stuff, girl on girl, or hentai, all of which she has purchased under the guise of "ours"

[Cheryl T]

Yes to the first 5 and NO to #6 as there isn't one.

[Ellie52]

ok here goes

1) yes
2)yes
3) yes she chose it
4)not yet but aiming too in the future
5) yes on many occasions
6) whats Corn got to do with it - we dont play those sort of games....:eek:


Ellie

[SusieB]

1. No
2. No
3. No
4. No
5. No but I often accompany her when buying for herself. She says I have good taste in ladies clothes and horrible taste in mens.
6. No don't have one

[Beth Wilde]

My partner is also a male CD'er so.......

1) Yes
2) Yes
3) Yes
4) Yes
5) Hell Yes!!
6) Don't have or need any, I own a fertile and slightly twisted imagination :)

[Teddie]

1. Do they know you dress? Yes. And, she takes an active role in it.

2. Have they seen you dress? Yes.

3. Do they know your femme persona? Yes.

4. Have you gone out together when dressed? Yes.

5. Have you shopped together for Gurl clothes? Many times.

6. Have they seen / watched your porn collection? Don't know what this has to do with it, but don't have a collection.

[Khaleesi81]

1. Yes
2. Yes
3. I don't have a femme persona, I'm the same in either mode.
4. No.
5. Yes.
6. Nope, I don't have a porn collection.

[sara_also]

I would have to say yes to all except #6.
Really don't have a collection like that.

[Jolene Robertson]

1. YES
2. YES
3. YES
4. YES
5. YES
6. Don't have one, Don't need it.

[Sometimes Steffi]

Yes, no, no, no, no, don't have one.

[Jana]

1. Yes
2-6. No

What about you?

[Toni in nz]

1 yes
2 yes
3 no
4 no
5 a big yes we love shopping for gurl clothes
6 no don't really have 1

[Madeline80]

1. Yes
2. Yes
3. Yes
4. Once, sort of
5. Hell yes
6. I don't have any, so we watch hers

[noeleena]

Hi,

Dressing has a different meaning for myself. every one knows what i dress in so one to five is they all know. = family & others. & our groups,

6 , brings up an interesting detail , as it pertains to males . what has it to do with dressing or cross dressing. as the women i work with on our womans forum would say why do men need this aspect in thier life marrage & relastionships, what part can it play for a sound marrage its very distructive its a put down to women it undermines a female takes away from her what her husband should be giveing to her, iv not heard from any woman that this aspect fostered a trust that should be there from the begining sad to say it has wrecked many marrages, & love has been placed wrongly out side of what a marrage is about, or should be.

I would be more than disapointed had i marred a male who went this way , his love would not be true to me, fact is as a female i would be devistated,

...noeleena...

[Dana3]

1. Do they know you dress? She knows that I'm a crossdresser

2. Have they seen you dress? No

3. Do they know your femme persona? No, not sure that I have one, although one of the on-line personality tests says I'm 78% female orientated

4. Have you gone out together when dressed? No

5. Have you shopped together for Gurl clothes? No, I wish!

6. Have they seen / watched your porn collection? Don't have one!

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Dot, First off welcome to our forum when you are here you are home.
My wife knows all about my crossdressing and has seen me dressed it's a DA-DT kind of thing.
I have bought clothes when we were shopping together .
I don't go out dressed and I don't need porn

[Laura912]

Yes to 1-5. Now why do you assume that all CDers have a porn collection? The majority of the answers to 6, including mine, have been no. Perhaps your assumption is not valid.

[Connie D50]

Ok here goes
yes
yes
yes
yes
yes
no

[kimdl93]

1-2 yes,
3-I don't have a female persona
4-not together...yet
5-yes
6-I have no porn collection

[TeresaCD]

Yes to every one but
6 - don't go there, try to stay well away.

[stephNE]

1. Yes
2. Yes
3. Yes
4. Yes
5. Yes
6. No, don't have one.
Interesting so many of us have similar answers.

[Megan70]

1 YES
2 YES
3 YES
4 YES
5 YES
6 not relevant-too personal ,edit and scrap the question 6
What's the big deal , doesn't every married CD-girl have an accepting wife or girlfriend that participates, helps dress her, suggest clothes, goes out, shops, dines and movies, and have had sex as girl friends years ago. ??. I have for 40+ years
Hope others experience such Navarra

[Princess Grandpa]

Julie and I are coming to know this side of myself together. You can put down yes to all of the above.

Hug
Rita

[Tiffanyselkoe]

Yes to all except 6. Don't have any porn

[suchacutie]

Tina is a product of our marriage. We do everything together Andrew without my wife there really could not be the mature feminine self and persona that is Tina. Category 6 is irrelevant.

[FrillyShelly]

So, Gurls.. Tell me. How much does your SO know about your femme self and your dressing? I am interested in if it's a completely hidden thing, or she knows everything about your girly self. Mayhaps categories would help:

1. Do they know you dress?

2. Have they seen you dress?

3. Do they know your femme persona?

4. Have you gone out together when dressed?

5. Have you shopped together for Gurl clothes?

6. Have they seen / watched your porn collection?

I look forward to hearing your answers to these questions! :D

NO
NO
NO
NO
NO
YES.......... yikes!! it's not a porn collection, but a collection of frilly, girly dresses

[Jenniferathome]

1 through 5 YES. I have been out to my wife for more than 2 years now.

As for 6, why would you assume someone even HAS a porn "collection"? Quite odd. Neither do I have a "collection" nor even "a" porn item.

[Sabrina133]

yes to 1-5. 6 - yes but only for the articles.

[alwayshave]

1-5. Yes. 6. I don't have one, my mind is a fertile enough playground that I don't need the help of others.

[Melissa_Rose]

1. Do they know you dress? Yes

2. Have they seen you dress? Yes

3. Do they know your femme persona? Havent figured one out yet so no..

4. Have you gone out together when dressed? Not yet.. soon..

5. Have you shopped together for Gurl clothes? Yes.. best shopping experiences ever

6. Have they seen / watched your porn collection?.. dont own any. Dont watch any.. my first reaction to this was " oh great another aspect of my life that doesnt fit the norms!.. ha. Happy to read all the replies..

I

[~Joanne~]

1. Yes
2. Yes
3. Yes
4. Yes
5. Yes
6. Yes

[Stephanie47]

Having read the responses so far, I guess I am in the minority. However, I really suspect I am in the majority of the cross dressing male population.

Yes, my wife knows I like to dress in female clothing. On occasion she has found a bra or panty that did not get put away. She'll put it out of sight and tell me where it is, and, that's all.

We made an attempt probably twenty years ago to go shopping for panties for me. It was a total disaster for her. It was like a dear caught in the headlights. It was absolute torture for her. I stopped any futile attempts to gain her acceptance.

Now she supports gay and lesbian marriage. Maybe there is still hope for me. But, I would not bet a pair of panties on it.

Porn? What's that got to do with it? Anyway, I collect baseball movies.

[Kali]

1. Do they know you dress?

Of course. It would be very hard to miss.

2. Have they seen you dress?

Daily

3. Do they know your femme persona?

Named it and helped me bring it out and integrate all aspects of my self into who I am

4. Have you gone out together when dressed?

Regularly

5. Have you shopped together for Gurl clothes?

All the time. she also just brings me home things she finds that she thinks I would look good in.

6. Have they seen / watched your porn collection?

Was someone handing out porn collections and I missed it? Add me to the "don't have one" list

I know exactly how lucky I am to have an understanding and supportive wife and simply add that as yet another reason why I love her.

[hallie]

So, Gurls.. Tell me. How much does your SO know about your femme self and your dressing? I am interested in if it's a completely hidden thing, or she knows everything about your girly self. Mayhaps categories would help:

1. Do they know you dress?

2. Have they seen you dress?

3. Do they know your femme persona?

4. Have you gone out together when dressed?

5. Have you shopped together for Gurl clothes?

6. Have they seen / watched your porn collection?

I look forward to hearing your answers to these questions! :D

1. Yes
2. No
3. yes
4. not ye :(
5. Yes last night!! (online though...)
6. NO - I dont have one..but I've showed them other girls like us.

I just came out to her 3 weeks ago about all this...she's still really confused. If anyone has a guide or something that helps others understand (in a simple way) whats happening that would be great :) I've found a lot online and stuff but a lot of it is overly detailed for someone who is just trying to understand the concept of all this stuff.

[Jenni Yumiko]

1. Do they know you dress?
Yes
2. Have they seen you dress?
Yes
3. Do they know your femme persona?
Yes
4. Have you gone out together when dressed?
No urge so n/a
5. Have you shopped together for Gurl clothes?
Yes
6. Have they seen / watched your porn collection?
Don't have one, except for the few pictures we took at band camp

[Debra Russell]

Yes to all but no porn - and we don't go out together -- but maybe soon..............................Debra

[Laura28]

1. Do they know you dress?
Yes
2. Have they seen you dress?
Yes, in pictures and in person only undergarments no make up
3. Do they know your femme persona?
not sure if i really have one??
4. Have you gone out together when dressed?
No we have talked about we do go out with underdressed and toes painted
5. Have you shopped together for Gurl clothes?
Yes, many times but only with me in male mode
6. Have they seen / watched your porn collection?
we have watched porn together in the past but not recently

[mikiSJ]

1. Do they know you dress?Yes, I told my wife of 38 years before we married.

2. Have they seen you dress?
Yes, but not since Miki came out of the closet.
3. Do they know your femme persona?Yes, and it has caused some problems in our marriage.

4. Have you gone out together when dressed?No, she wants Miki to be private, and I honor that.

5. Have you shopped together for Gurl clothes?Yes.

6. Have they seen / watched your porn collection?No, what makes you assume all CDer watch porn.

[ReineD]

6. Have they seen / watched your porn collection?

I'm a SO and I can answer yes to questions 1 - 5. My SO and I go out frequently when she is dressed, and not just shopping. We go to restaurants, shows, art galleries, etc.

As to question 6, I am not aware that my SO has any porn collection. Or even that there remains any sexual activity caused by the CDing. I think that she is past that. But if she isn't, she might prefer to keep it private.

[BillieJoEllen]

Perhaps a better question to ask in place of #6 is - Have they ever seen your writings, videos or DVDs, clipped articles from newspapers and magazines?

If so, yes.

1. Yes

2. Yes, but years and years ago

3. No

4. No

5. Yes but only for her

[Farrah]

NO x6....... :(

[NV Susan]

1. Do they know you dress? Yes, but it's an "don't ask don't tell" kind of thing now.:brolleyes:

2. Have they seen you dress? Yes, but not for many years.:daydreaming:

3. Do they know your femme persona? No, don't think so. :battingeyelashes:

4. Have you gone out together when dressed? No, only I do wear panties, girl jeans, shoes, socks all the time. :straightface:

5. Have you shopped together for Gurl clothes? Yes & No, only when she is shopping for herself. :sad:

6. Have they seen / watched your porn collection? No, don't have one. :eek:

[Beverley Sims]

One to five "yes"
Six, What comprises a porn collection? :)

[ReineD]

Perhaps a better question to ask in place of #6 is - Have they ever seen your writings, videos or DVDs, clipped articles from newspapers and magazines?

Maybe the porn (or pics that make the heart race) apply more to the pre-middle age set, for whom the CDing is bound to be more sexual, give or take a few years.

[CDPheobe]

I have to say that its all yes to all answers.

My wife is my everything and I can't see myself leaving any details out. To me if you need to hide something, the possibilities of something going south, increase. I'm too honest. I don't even bent truth to my kids. I just don't want anything coming back to bite me in the you know what. Lol

[reb.femme]

My wife knows as much as she wishes to know. That desire can ebb and flow with the tide though. Still, she married a 'normal' guy....ish!, so that's not a criticism, just an observation.

1. Only since she caught me dressed in her nightie last year. Apparently, I went quite red. Strange that.

2. Most definitely.

3. Not really too much of a change in personality when dressed.

4. Only around the block, but she has promised to go elsewhere.....we'll see on that one though!

5. Big yes....lots of times. She is my personal shopper. Buys girlie Xmas presents for me too.

6. Not into porn. I like to be involved in the play, not watching.

I love my wife big style :o

Reb

[ErinSassyPants]

I'll take the heat for the Porn question. When Polka Dot mentioned he was going to ask the question I threw in "yeah but how many have shown their SO their porn?" He was in NO way assuming all CDers have a porn collection so that was an interesting reaction some people have.

BTW a porn "collection" can be anything from two old playboys in a forgotten drawer or an old Sears catalog where you got your first glimpse of fancy lady clothes all the way to a gigabit hard drive filled with every hard core movie ever made.

I will say the reason I thought it would be interesting is that when I moved in with Polka Dot before we got married he never hid access to any of that so while I haven't sat down and watched the random stuff he collected over the years I did go through to see what he had found interesting enough to save. Then when we've been talking and he'll say "Well I'm not into that" I have said "so explain the *insert flavor* porn" and it's been a great help in understanding him because he's not good at expressing what's going on inside of him.

I find the reactions of people to that questions to be the most interesting of this thread. I noticed lots of protests and then the people who were not afraid to say they had something they considered to fit just quietly answering the questions.

[Polka Dot]

Good answers, everyone! I was just trying to get a picture of where everyone is at on their life's journey. Question 6 was mostly to indicate what type of materials turn you on or give you "zing", and whether your SO knows what those things are.

I guess it's my turn now.

1. Do they know you dress?
YES. I told her on our second date.

2. Have they seen you dress?
YES. On our third date, I brought my camera and floodlights to her house and we did a photo set with her and I dressed up.

3. Do they know your femme persona?
I don't think that I have one, I just dress up to feel sexy and it relaxes me.

4. Have you gone out together when dressed?
NO. I have never gone out of the house while dressed.

5. Have you shopped together for Gurl clothes?
YES. It's always such a good bonding experience together.

6. Have they seen / watched your porn collection?
YES. My wife (Then girlfriend) asked straight out to see mine 6 months into our relationship. I gather she got some good insights into what makes me tick from the material I had (mostly computer videos).

[reb.femme]

......BTW a porn "collection" can be anything from two old playboys in a forgotten drawer or an old Sears catalog where you got your first glimpse of fancy lady clothes all the way to a gigabit hard drive filled with every hard core movie ever made.

It is a case of perspectives as always, and yep, I remember the old mags from my days long past.
I think question 6 is valid, it just doesn't apply to me or the better half. Not unless she has her own secret stash that I'm not aware of.

Reb

[KarenCDFL]

Yes for 1 through 5

There is no # 6

[ErinSassyPants]

1. Do they know you dress?
YES. I told her on our second date.

2. Have they seen you dress?
YES. On our third date, I brought my camera and floodlights to her house and we did a photo set with her and I dressed up.

6. Have they seen / watched your porn collection?
YES. My wife (Then girlfriend) asked straight out to see mine 6 months into our relationship. I gather she got some good insights into what makes me tick from the material I had (mostly computer videos).


Sweetie, I had no idea those first two were dates. :o

Also, I don't think I asked. As I remember it you gave me access to your movies and they were in a file in there with a not at all subtle name next to the mainstream Hollywood movies. In any case it really has given me insight into you that I wouldn't have had otherwise and I appreciate that. I did tell you that I'd seen them when I discovered them.


It is a case of perspectives as always, and yep, I remember the old mags from my days long past.
I think question 6 is valid, it just doesn't apply to me or the better half. Not unless she has her own secret stash that I'm not aware of.

Reb

She may well...many woman do only we call them "romance novels".

[shawnsheila]

1. Do they know you dress?
Yes

2. Have they seen you dress?
Yes, if a picture counts

3. Do they know your femme persona?
No

4. Have you gone out together when dressed?
No, but I wish

5. Have you shopped together for Gurl clothes?
No, But I wish

6. Have they seen / watched your porn collection?
Yes, when I was younger but I don't have a porn collection anymore... Too busy :)

[Robin777]

1. Do they know you dress?

Yes
2. Have they seen you dress?
All The Time

3. Do they know your femme persona?

It is the same, both ways

4. Have you gone out together when dressed?
No,Not Yet Maybe Someday

5. Have you shopped together for Gurl clothes?
All The Time

6. Have they seen / watched your porn collection?
No porn collection.

[Jodi]

Polka Dot, Why would you assume that all cd's have a porn collection? You probably have one, which is fine. I don't have a porn collection, and I don't need one. Always remember, that not all people live like you live.

Jodi


So, Gurls.. Tell me. How much does your SO know about your femme self and your dressing? I am interested in if it's a completely hidden thing, or she knows everything about your girly self. Mayhaps categories would help:

1. Do they know you dress?

2. Have they seen you dress?

3. Do they know your femme persona?

4. Have you gone out together when dressed?

5. Have you shopped together for Gurl clothes?

6. Have they seen / watched your porn collection?

I look forward to hearing your answers to these questions! :D

[daviolin]

All the way to five. We don't do porn. Daviolin

[Kelley]

Yes 1-5
No 6 (don't have one)

Kelley

[Heather J]

1. Do they know you dress? Yes

2. Have they seen you dress? Yes

3. Do they know your femme persona? Yes

4. Have you gone out together when dressed? No

5. Have you shopped together for Gurl clothes? Yes

6. Have they seen / watched your porn collection? Yes

[PretzelGirl]

<Looks to my right> Honey, do you know that I wear what I am wearing?

Ok
1. Yes
2. Yes
3. Yes
4. Yes a lot
5. Yes a lot too
6. No, unless you count Glamour, InStyle, and Allure

[DebbieL]

So, Gurls.. Tell me. How much does your SO know about your femme self and your dressing? I am interested in if it's a completely hidden thing, or she knows everything about your girly self. Mayhaps categories would help:


1. Do they know you dress? Yes, I made a point of it in my Match.com profile, if it was a problem, she wouldn't have e-mailed.


2. Have they seen you dress? Yes, both pictures and in person, numerous times.


3. Do they know your femme persona? Yes, she likes Debbie more than she likes Rex.


4. Have you gone out together when dressed? Yes, I'm usually the femme of the pair. She wears the pants.


5. Have you shopped together for Gurl clothes? Yes, she doesn't want be dressing too ****ty. She helps me blend - I always pass now


6. Have they seen / watched your porn collection? I've shared several Amazon books. She's shared some of hers. We have similar tastes.

We've had to limit sex for a while. She's had about a dozen hernias and 4 surgeries - from "Belly Whomper" orgasms. She doesn't know when she's had too much, until it's too late.

One of the advantages of not depending on what's between my legs to please a woman.

[heatherdress]

1. Do they know you dress? Yes - she encouraged me to start crossdressing

2. Have they seen you dress? Yes - she asks me to dress and has helped me with makeup, hair and clothing styles

3. Do they know your femme persona? Yes

4. Have you gone out together when dressed? Yes

5. Have you shopped together for Gurl clothes? Yes - sometimes we buy the same shoes or outfits

6. Have they seen / watched your porn collection? N/A - no collection

[ossian]

1) she knows I dress.
2) no she has not seen me dress. She is still very new to this and I don't want to scare her.
3) we are working through this at the moment, in therapy, blush...........
4) no I'm afraid of her reaction. I love her and don't want to force this on her. Everything in its own time.
5) no but she bought me three wonderful dresses last week. :-)
6) what porn collection?

[Lorileah]

I will have to answer in the past tense. I don't have a SO right now

1. Do they know you dress?
Yes, it was just about the first thing I told them
2. Have they seen you dress?
Yes and undress and dress again
3. Do they know your femme persona?
Yes she loved Lori as much or more than the male
4. Have you gone out together when dressed?
yes many many times
5. Have you shopped together for Gurl clothes?
yes
6. Have they seen / watched your porn collection?
no collection but we watched movies and looked at magazines and even went to adult stores

[Amanda M]

1 to 5 - yes
6 None.

[Jacqueline Winona]

1. Do they know you dress?
Yes, but she prefers not to know.
2. Have they seen you dress?
Yes, but fully dressed only for Halloween or similar occasions.
3. Do they know your femme persona?
No, she knows I have a femme side but again prefers not to know more.
4. Have you gone out together when dressed?
Only for Halloween, etc.
5. Have you shopped together for Gurl clothes?
Yes, but again not for much other than underwear.
6. Have they seen / watched your porn collection?
Don't have one. Years (decades is more accurate) ago she saw some that I had. Not her thing, not really my thing anymore either.

[janet54]

All to yes but not 6 . We don't go there.