How about a crossdresser starter kit?

[Sandieland]

As I got into crossdressing, I didn't know where to start. What clothes to buy, what makeup was needed, what accessories and under garments, etc. It's formidable. So, I thought... why not put together a "starter kit" for newbies (OK. for all of us) that would list the abosolute essentials a new girl will need. All of this would get our gal ready for her first night or day out. Then, she could build on this as her personal tastes require. An example of one item in the kit would be "tops"...what kind, what are they called, what is needed for shopping, going out with the girls, etc. Heck, I still don't know what certain types of upper body wear is called. So, enough said... any suggestions to kick this off?

Note to moderator: I felt this would be of general interest to everyone, but if you want to move it to another thread like clothing, shopping, etc. please do.

[Leona]

Here's my list:

Clothing:
* Tank top
* Any random skirt
* 1 Summer dress
* 1 Bra that has a suitable band size
* Panties/men's bikini briefs
* women's flip flops

Body parts:
* 1 set of inexpensive breast forms (optional for some, since these can be improvised if you're on a budget)
* Wig (If you have long hair already, then my suggestion is to skip the wig until you've worked with the other stuff and gotten a handle on what direction you're going)

If makeup is desired:
* Foundation (doesn't matter if it's the right color)
* Concealer
* Any eye shadow kit (and I do mean kit)
* Eyeliner
* lipstick
* blush

Use your manly razor blades to shave everything, then put on whatever outfit from what you have.

Makeup is applied in this order:
1. Concealer (cover up the whiskers)
2. Foundation (paint your whole face with a light layer)
3. Eyeshadow
* If you took my suggestion and bought a kit with three colors in it, then put the darkest one on the lid, the middle one on the crease, and the last one under the brow, and only color in the socket, don't wander out. That's "basic" eyeshadow, and what many GGs do for everyday eyeshadow.
4. Eyeliner (Goes on the lid at the lash)
5. Mascara (goes on the lashes)
6. Blush (Make the biggest cheesiest smile, and then only color on the part of your cheeks that stick out, the apple of your cheeks)
7. Lipstick

It is the simplest list I could think of that contains all the basic elements of looking like a woman. From there, the newbie crossdresser should break each item down for study and learn about each one in its turn.

The makeup suggestions are basic starter suggestions. It's makeup, it's an art form, you *will* experiment, but if you follow these suggestions you'll be starting where most GGs start.

The wig can be had pretty inexpensively at an adult book store that sells toys as well. Those fantasy wigs will range in price from $10-$30 or more, but you DO get what you pay for. Also, you probably won't enjoy them much past the first time. However, if you catch Paula Young wigs on sale, you can get some of their best wigs for 30 or 40 bucks. Light years better than porn shop wigs and with proper care will last way longer. Buying decent quality doesn't have to cost a fortune.

Here is a place where you can get ultralight breast forms for $36. I've talked to her personally, and she told me that she developed her technique for making these breast forms on a crossdresser forum (probably this one, I'd imagine), and she's quite happy to sell them to crossdressers. She's added a sizing guide, so once you have your band size, you can essentially pick a cup size and then order the appropriate size forms.
http://mastectomysolutions.com/items-for-sale.php

Those breast forms will not feel realistic and could be quite unsatisfying, depending on your own leanings. They work for me now, but limit my choices in clothes quite a bit, so they are almost certainly not a long-term solution for any crossdresser. They just happen to be at a good price, well worth the money if you can get just two satisfying weeks of use out of them.

There's also The Breast Form Store (http://www.thebreastformstore.com). They have products that range quite a bit in price, with many products that users report feel very realistic. For breasts in general, it really is about how much money you're willing to spend.

Also, she has the best bra sizing guide I've ever seen. I used it to fit my wife, and she finally wears bras that fit comfortably.
http://mastectomysolutions.com/bra-sizing.php

Goodwill is a good suggestion for inexpensive clothes. If there's a Burlington Coat Factory in your area, they often have bras on sale as 2 for $8 or so, but they're usually push-up bras. You want to start with a full coverage bra. All the *-Marts usually have clearance items. Any drug store or grocery store should have every listed makeup piece. So altogether, if you shop smart, you can put this list together for under $100.

After you dress up for the first time (or at least after using this list), you will no doubt have feelings telling you which direction(s) to go next. This list is nowhere near comprehensive enough to suggest what you do next, just keep in mind the internet has plenty of information. You find you want more pretty bras? Go read the wikipedia article about bras and then go shopping! Maybe you're more interested in lingerie? Go browse Victoria's Secret and Frederick's of Hollywood as excellent starting places.

The sky's the limit where you go next.

[Sandieland]

I just thought of something I could use almost anywhere... a tube top, otherwise known as a Bandeau bra? Or is this what is called a "tank top" as well? They are cheap, come in dozens of colors and can be layered with almost any type of blouse. Depending on your breast forms, no bra would be needed with one of these...although I guess you couldn't wear a regular bra with one...or could you?

[tvfaye]

This is a great idea for newbies, there is so much to learn when starting out, maybe more tips could be helpful. My advice is take it step by step and enjoy the process, it only happens once.

[I Am Paula]

A tube top, if your boobs aren't attached to you, will just slide down, taking whatever you're using as boobs with it.
No, you could not wear a bra with a tube top. Trust me, don't try.

[Chari]

Each of us has in mind what our first complete outfit should be, and hopefully, we will(had) achieve that goal. There are many facets to create and enhance our feminine side, not just wearing lingerie, a dress, heels, and lipstick! IMO, depending on the size, age, season, and event for the "new girl", it is best to observe what GG's in the area are wearing, to "blend in" rather than stand out. It all takes a lot of time and practice to be comfortable and confident with our image.

[Kandy Barr]

A suggestion. We ought to get the moderators to get a sticky together for this. We could title it " Essentials for the beginning CDer ", or something to that effect. Just a thought......

[linda allen]

Here's my list:

* Tank top
* Any random skirt
* 1 Summer dress
* 1 Bra that has a suitable band size
* Panties/men's bikini briefs
* Foundation (doesn't matter if it's the right color)
* Concealer
* Any eye shadow kit (and I do mean kit)
* Eyeliner
* lipstick
* blush
* women's flip flops

Use your manly razor blades to shave everything, then put on whatever outfit from what you have.

Makeup is in this order:
1. Concealer (cover up the whiskers)
2. Foundation
3. Eyeshadow
4. Eyeliner
5. Blush
6. Lipstick

It is the simplest list I could think of that contains all the basic elements of looking like a woman. From there, the newbie crossdresser should break each item down for study and learn about each one in its turn.

No breast forms, just a bra? No hip and butt padding? No wig? A tank top?

A list would be fine, but obvioisly, we all have different ideas on what it takes to look and feel like a woman. You pretty much have to compile your own list. I think most of us just start dressing, realize we are missing something, buy it, then realize we are missing something else and buy it, and continue until we have what we need.

Personally, I would put most of the makeup far below forms, padding, and the wig.

[Dianne S]

No breast forms, just a bra? No hip and butt padding? No wig?

I only fairly recently acquired breast forms and hip/butt padding. In my previous CD life, I used to improvise breast forms with water balloons and hip padding with a couple of shoulder pads sewn together. I didn't have a wig either because I grew my hair out.

I have to say, real breast forms and padded panties are far superior to the improvised ones. I ordered a wig recently, so we'll see what difference it makes when it arrives.

[linda allen]

Yes, I used to improvise, but now that I've introduced my wife to my "habit", I buy what I need to do it right.

I considered (and started) growing my hair out because my wife commented that my wig looked "fake", but it got pretty shaggy looking so mmy wife convinced me to have it cut. I ordered another wig instead.

[Beverley Sims]

Sounds like something you would buy in a souvenir bag at a state fair. :)

Sorry Sandie, it is a sound suggestion on your part.

Leona, yours sounds like a summer camp kit.
Don't forget to put your name on everything. :)

[Ressie]

I feel like such a noob. I don't know the difference between foundation and concealer. I have some kind of base makeup that I bought just to try out. I don't have any blush either.

As far as a starter kit idk. A wig for example is a must, but it can't be just any wig, so how could it be part of a kit? Getting the right sizes of skirts, tops etc. is a problem when starting out too. So maybe an instruction booklet would make more sense than a starter kit. JMO.

[robindee36]

Not sure about the other girls but I have wasted a lot of money on lingerie and clothing that just did not work. It has taken a fair bit of trial and error just to find the correct types of bras that fit, flatter and show a bit of decolletage. This can be one of the more expensive learning experiences as the good ones run in the $40 - $60 range. Since there is some natural endowment, I don't use forms, just some silicone boosters ;)

The best situation for me was finding a trans friendly corset shop that helped with measurements and fitting. Purchasing without trying on is a gamble at best. Resale shops offer the value if you are not trying things on in the store. Since my wardrobe, of necessity, is limited, skirt and top combinations offer the best variety. Many different looks with the least number of moving parts.

My basic wardrobe list: Shapewear panties for tucking, demi-cup pushup bra, hose/thigh-highs, miniskirt, blouse, wig. Makeup is very personal. My basic makeup list: beard cover (red lipstick), foundation, eye liner and shadow, eyebrow pencil, mascara, lip liner and lip stick, blush. Neutragena makeup removal wipes.

It is a lot to digest at once. I started underdressing first, then added cloths, then hair and finally makeup. Oh yes, don't forget a nice pair of heels.

Have fun. The journey of learning is as exciting as reaching the final destination.

Hugs.

[Kate Simmons]

You realize what you need as you go along and gain experience. While many books have been written by CDers, there really is no "Crossdressing 101" as our individual needs are individually tailored. Many of us got to where we are now by years (and I mean literally decades) of experience. You will only really learn by trial and error, however.:)

[Hannah W.]

Really good list, thanks for putting it together

[NicoleScott]

We crossdress for different reasons, have different goals, and have different style preferences - and oh yeah, different budgets. One beginners kit list wouldn't work for everyone. As a beginner (oh so long ago), I started with the items that were the most compelling for me to have (lipstick and high heels), and built from there.
I am a list-maker for many things I do, like ingredient shopping lists for recipes, project materials list, etc. I did make a detailed list of crossdresser items to take (and buy if needed) when I went on a week-long vacation alone (what a great CDing time I had).

[sherri]

This is actually not a bad idea. I have been asked for that very sort of information from newbies in private correspondence. Just because we all have different methods, tastes and preferences doesn't mean a basic start-up list, preferably categorized, wouldn't be useful. And it needs to be pretty thorough cuz lots of neophytes really have no idea how much is involved. But as others have remarked, having a list is just a starting place, so the "kit" should prolly include a list of resources for things like sizing, makeup how-to, etc. This forum is chock full of such info, as are many other sites, but an under-one-roof go-to could save a lot of time and mistakes.

[Sandieland]

Thanks everyone. Your replies are awesome.

[BRANDYJ]

There is a place on the net that does sell starter kits. Don't remember the name of the site. But clearly they were out to rip you off. Grossly over-priced low quality garments and makeup.

No two of us like the same style of clothes or even makeup and wigs. There is no way to put together a starter kit that fits all.

Just go buy what you like and go from there. Your style, your choices and what fits your body style will change over time. Stay within your budget and learn as you go.

[Debra Russell]

There is a starter kit store -- Goodwill , has all most everything.........................Debra

[windycissy]

What a great idea, sort of a Care Package for fledglings to spread their wings! Here is how I answered a similar question on Ask Windy Cissy:

Dear Jenny, Once you get your first ensemble together, it's a snap to go shopping as a girl, but getting yourself together for the first time is quite the challenge! It takes a little planning and patience...the hardest acquisitions are your wig, makeup and shoes. So let's have a little fun with it! Wait till a few days before Halloween and then tell the salesperson at the wig store that you need a really good one for a costume party. As for makeup, after you fill your shopping basket at the drugstore with one of everything (foundation, powder, shadow, eyeliner, mascara, blusher, lipstick) tell the cashier that the airline lost your wife's suitcase! Shoes you can just gut out at Payless - pick out a pair for yourself and lay down your $10. The rest is easy: you can buy lingerie for your "girlfriend" for Valentine's Day, and a dress, stockings and accessories for "her" for Christmas. By this time next year, you'll be able to dress up and shop for yourself in your new things! Windy

[Vickie_CDTV]

Various companies over the years have sold such starter kits over the years, usually a bra, panties, breastforms, cheap makeup, maybe a cheap waist cincher and maybe a choice of wig. Michael Salem (*shudder*) is the earliest I remember, later on some of the various TV specialty stores and catalogs, and today some eBay sellers have them. The makeup is almost always poor quality, and the clothing included looks cheap too. Might have been helpful back in the 80s when I first saw such kits, but nowadays, ehh.... forget it.

JoAnn Roberts published a crossdressing guide that had a handy section detailing various clothing styles and what they are called, which I still find handy sometimes. Today, such information can be dynamically update-able, instead of a static book or web pages, I always thought a crossdressing wiki would be a great idea, where people could share tips and tricks and information and build a knowledge base collaboratively.

[Stephanie47]

First recommendation! Whatever ensemble you choose, please start in your home. Analyze the consequences of your actions. Obviously you have access to the Internet or you would not be on this site. Go to YouTube or similar sites are watch the instructional videos on makeup, walking in heels, feminine mannerisms. You may look totally passable, but, give yourself away by acting like a male.

That being said, my recommendation is to dress 'age appropriate.' I'm a fan of dresses, no slacks, no jeans, just dresses.
Get a pretty dress, a slip if the dress is not lined, a matching bra and panty set, pantyhose, and a pair of comfortable shoes that any male could walk in the first time out. Buy a suitable wig. Makeup? Go light at first. If you're young and have skin that has not been marred by the weather, smoking or just old age, going easy on the makeup should work.

My first several times out, were when I was young. It was on Halloween. I did not intentionally mingle with crowds, but, I did go into grocery stores to buy soda/pop because I would not have to show identification. If someone were to identify you as a male on Halloween, well, it's Halloween. Now, I guess you can thrown in Gay Pride Day too!

It's only three months to Halloween, so you can start planning now.

[CherylFlint]

In medicine they’re called “advocates”, someone who makes sure everything is done right.
For us we need a real honest to goodness female to help us, or many females.
First, each of our faces is of a different shape and color. Some of us may look good as a blonde, some as brown haired. Some of look good with long hair, some with short. You need to got to a professional wig store and get fitted. Walk-in, introduce yourself as a CD and ask for their recommendations and be fitted for a certain price range. You should be able to get a decent wig for $60 or less.
Second, go to a mastectomy store and say the same thing, that you are a CD and wish to be fitted. They may very well get all huffy and kick you out, so keep trying to find the right one, they’re out there, all you have to do is look, or call. I would recommend asking in person. She’ll fit you with the proper shape and size forms, and sell you the proper size mastectomy bra with pockets to hold the forms.
Makeup is done at a beauty salon or a makeup counter at the mall. If they do a makeover, pay attention, ask questions. They’ll expect you to spend around $40 for makeup. Buy quality makeup, don’t buy cheap makeup at the drug store or Wal-Mart.
Most CD’s buy too high of heels. Big mistake. Always put comfort over style, you’ll need a little heel to lift your ass up but an 1” is sufficient.
Go to thrift stores. And when you do go out, visit those places where you bought the wig, the forms, had the makeovers and ask the girls how did you do.
You can get to the “passing” stage by spending A LOT of money, or you can get there by spending A LOT LESS and a lot quicker by doing what I suggested.
The object should be the ability to “pass”, to be able to go out in public and be accepted as a woman, to be able to use the Ladies Room with no questions.
If you got a beer gut, deal with it. If you smoke, don’t smoke while wearing your wig, because nothing messes up a wig more than cigarette smoke.
A flat stomach is imperative.
It all depends on how much you want it (to “pass”).

[sherri]

If you can find a mentor that's great, but I learned the ropes with zero help from GGs, or anyone else to speak of. It's amazing what you can learn online these days. I've ordered numerous wigs that fit well and look nice at paulayoung.com. Affordable too. The people at thebreastformstore.com are extremely helpful and accommodating, and their forms are good quality, realistic and affordable.

You can buy Cover Girl, L'Oreal and Revlon makeup at WalMart or Target, works great. And again, there are tons of makeup videos on YouTube. Mac and others are great too, but I see people from my hometown in those stores all the time and I'd be outed in a heartbeat if I tried to get a makeover there. I have bought makeup there though and the SAs were nice and helpful.

Thrift stores are terrific anytime, but especially while you're learning your sizes, styles and preferences. Once you figure those out, you can shop anywhere, even online, with reasonable confidence. I don't have a beer gut, but I don't have a washboard tummy either, probably never will again at my age. But I do try to keep it under control and I get compliments nearly every time I go out. If you wait for perfection you'll never have any fun. :-) I will say one other thing for weight control -- it increases your clothing options dramatically. Btw, I think little things like tanning your legs, taking care of your skin, keeping up your nails, good grooming, etc are just as important.

Oh, and one more thing -- heels are fun and sexy and make your legs look great. Sandals and wedges are must-haves, but sometimes only high heels will do. I could walk in heels no problem from the get-go, and can even dance in them, but I did learn that 4" was about my limit, especially for a stiletto. Your mileage may vary. I only wear high heels when I'm wearing something dressy or doing summer sexy with a denim skirt or whatever, but for day wear and casual club nights I'm usually in sandals or 3" wedges. And I have been known to hit the dance floor in my bare feet too!

Passing is a wishful, sometimes delusional myth for most of us. A few are lucky that way, but most of us would have to have hormones and surgery and a magic wand and it would still be iffy. But passing is not necessarily the point, nor is it mandatory for going out, interacting with the world and having fun. The actual point is to do all the things you need to do to be femme and do them well so that people can see that you have made the effort, that you know what you're doing, that you have a pleasant, tasteful appearance. And so you can feel good about yourself and have a good time. That's it. Anything more is just icing on the cake.

So you see, there is more than one way to skin the cat. Nothing is carved in stone, and that's as it should be.

[Leona]

Ah, I left the wig off the list because I have long hair and don't wear a wig. I'll edit my post with a cheap wig. As for breast forms, my suggestion would be to improvise at start.

Everybody's needs are different, so any list of "startup" items should be reasonably inexpensive to purchase. Everything on my list can be bought at the local grocery store (except the underwear) at certain times of year and can be filled up for $100 or less, depending on how cost-conscious you are.

I think a good starter wig on a budget would be the fantasy wigs they sell at the adult book stores. You can get one for $10-$30, and they do look every bit as cheap as they are, but hey, it's a starter list. :) From there, I think any individual could figure out which direction to go after that.

Definitely need a list of resources. I'll dig up a link to where you can buy unrealistic breast forms that look real (but don't feel real at all) as long as you wear a full coverage bra for about $20.

I ended up making considerable edits to my first post here. :)

[sherri]

I'm not sure we have to assume that bargain basement cost is a must, or advisable. Wouldn't it be better to steer someone to stuff that will server her needs in the long run? I mean, why waste money on cheap stuff that she'll soon have to replace? I think back to those gawdawful first wigs I bought, and shudder to think that I actually wore them to the clubs. I'm sure they made an impression alright -- a really bad impression. Ditto for boobs that look and feel like egg cartons. Not a good way to start.

Btw, if you catch Paula Young wigs on sale, you can get some of their best wigs for 30 or 40 bucks. Light years better than porn shop wigs and with proper care will last way longer. Buying decent quality doesn't have to cost a fortune.

[Leona]

Heh, not suggesting anybody actually go out in them. Maybe I should put that in there?

Um, I agree with the criticism about bargain basement cost. For some of us, it's worth spending some time estimating what the long-term cost commitment may be, and working through a "starter kit" list of sorts that's reasonably affordable can help with that. For those that don't have that as a process they use, then a starter kit is much less useful. For them, I have no idea what to suggest.

I'm a wait on a wig. I have a friend who got some really nice wigs when she was on chemo that she's willing to let me have, and I'm still on the fence since I do have long hair.

Sherri: I added your comments about the wigs to the post. Now I'm wishing it were a wiki page so we could all just edit. :)

Is there a crossdressing wiki anywhere that can act as a central repository of information?

[sherri]

I wasn't criticizing, just contributing to the conversation.

[Brooklyn]

#1 would be some books and resources to help people come to terms with being T.
#2 moisturizing sunscreen!
#3 tweezers

Since most of us start as children, it's not like a hobby you decide to pick up, like scuba diving or tango lessons. The basic beauty and dressing stuff is not hard to figure out, especially now with the internet.

[Wildaboutheels]

How about a simple 8.5X11 placard for the fridge? Maybe in Hot Pink or International Orange? With the words...

Educate yourself and then find your own path if you ever wish to be Happy.

[Leona]

Since most of us start as children, it's not like a hobby you decide to pick up, like scuba diving or tango lessons. The basic beauty and dressing stuff is not hard to figure out, especially now with the internet.

I reached a point where I just started reading women's mags occasionally. Even Cosmo (but don't tell anybody! unless we're making fun of their sex advice, which is almost always bad).

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Sandie , The first two things to start with Is a great looking wig and a pair if 4" heels,
then you can fill in the middle as you go along.