Seeing sisters out and about.

[Tracii G]

I know this has been touched on many times but I had an encounter today.
I saw a sister today at the grocery I shop at most of the time.
Nice upscale neighborhood and all the employees are very respectful to me no matter if I'm 50/50 or totally enfemme.
Today was enfemme Friday and I had styled my long straight wig with the bangs and had some nice loose waves in it.Black and red top/ cami and dark Jeans with some bling on the pockets.
She looked very well put together style wise and very very pretty.Beautiful long blonde hair done in a long braided ponytail,sunglasses on top of her head that matched her outfit.
Very nice hand bag and accessories.
I noticed the hands and the adams apple right off as I passed her in the aisle.
I didn't make eye contact with her the first time I saw her.
A few aisles later I saw her coming at me, she smiled and said I love your jeans they are really cute and your hair looks nice I love the curls.
I said thanks you look so pretty but I didn't want to say anything.
She said I love to see sisters out in public it makes me feel better knowing I'm not alone.
I said me too but I never really see too many of us out in public.Her cell rang so I moved on down the aisle.
As I was loading my car she honked her horn and waved as she drove by so I waved back.
I sure hope I run into her again she seemed very nice I would say she was mid 30's and about 6 feet tall in her 3in heels.

[Kandy Barr]

I so wish I could run into others of us, perhaps I could make a friend to share shopping with. I love my life en femme Tracy, but I'm so isolated out in the country when I,do go to Ft. Worth / Dallas to shop its always by myself. Didn't mean to get on my pity pot, wanh, wanh. Geez, what ever did I do before I found this forum, you girls are my life line.....So thanks!!!

[Tracii G]

She was really open and spoke to me first so I just went with it and started talking.
She said her name was Lila so I told her mine.It was kind of surreal to be honest.
Usually its a nod or a smile with another trans girl in a public setting.
At trans meetings its a gab fest of course.

[suzanne]

Nice story. You both handled the situation very well. Other threads have been started over the question of whether there should be some secret identifier or signal CDs can use to recognise and greet each other. The way you did it is the example for us all. Just make eye contact, smile and offer a compliment. Isn't that how GGs do it? Males are conditioned to understand that eye contact is a challenge and should be done very sparingly. It is a habit that we need to let go of in the pursuit of a feminine presentation.

[Karen_Ski]

Back when I started going out in everyday situations back in the 80's there wasn't a lot of us out and about, even here in Lala land! Now it is not uncommon to see a sister out, whether to approach them is always the issue. I have made several good friends from sisters I have met on the street, however be respectful of your sister in lace. If she seems shy or pulls back just wish her a good day and be on your way. There are still a lot of girls out there just taking their first baby steps out of the closet.

[Michelle (Oz)]

Just make eye contact, smile and offer a compliment. Isn't that how GGs do it? Males are conditioned to understand that eye contact is a challenge and should be done very sparingly. It is a habit that we need to let go of in the pursuit of a feminine presentation.

Unfortunately I haven't seen any sisters when out dressed but your point Suzanne about eye contact is interesting.

I regularly see GGs looking at me with their 6th sense picking me as male. I'm sufficiently confident that, with a smile (another trait of GGs), I make eye contact with them and their reaction is usually one of warm acceptance.

[reb.femme]

Nice encounter Tracii, one I would love to emulate.

I have to say though, the only time I see sisters locally is when I go to the support group. Other than that, my area is either barren as regards sisters or they are all so good at presenting, they pass without trying. In that case, note to self....."must try harder".

Rebecca

[Erica Marie]

Tracii that ia the story I dream about every day. It is so cool you met someone who could possibly turn out to be a good friend. Hope you two cross paths again. :)

[stephNE]

That is so nice. When I am out, if someone were to notice and say 'hello' to me, it would make me really happy.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Tracii, I have seen what I think is a sister but was always afraid to say anything.

[kimdl93]

Very cool! She sounds like a totally together person, pretty much like you. Maybe she's a member here?

[Tina B.]

A close encounter of the good kind! Nice that you where both so confident as to be able to react in such a comfortable and natural way. I've always been in the leave a sister alone camp, but done like that, even I would not cut and run, you both showed a lot of class.
I've lived here for over a decade and in that time I've only seen one sister out side the local pride parade, no wig, cheap thin house shift, and mannish sandals, no make up of course, it was so cute, she was walking along hand in hand with her wife, who was dressed just about the same. It made me smile, just goes to show, no matter where you are on the economic scale, or social scale, a CD will find a way to express herself, I'm sure she felt very feminine, after all she was dressed just like her favorite lady!
Some will say it gives us a bad name going out looking like that, but what I saw was public prove that there are plenty of women out there that will take us as we are!
My wife does, but not in public!

[Lynn Marie]

Always carry a "ladies business card" with your picture on it with you. Have them made or make them up yourself. Include your email address, cell number, and maybe your Flickr or Facebook site. You meet someone you like, and you can exchange cards.

[PretzelGirl]

It sounds like she approached in the way everyone recommends. Look how well it worked out! I probably would have traded email addresses if she was willing. I have seen a few out and about, but haven't gotten past a friendly smile (most) and a greeting (one).

[erickka]

Too cool Tracii. Too bad that'll NEVER happen in this podunk little bible belt town of 34,000. They all would just as soon shoot one of us, simply because they feel we don't belong.

[Loni]

this am on the way to work, at the post office i was dropping off the checks to pay some bills.
she was holding off walking into the bld fiddling with her purse.

a bad deal wrong place to be at that time just walking around.
worse places to be. but all alone mostly dark.

but we all started someplace.

.

[Tracii G]

Loni we all have to start some place that is true.
I have seen a few buying gas here and there and you could tell it was one of their first times being out so I leave them alone because they have to be really scared.
I know I was the first few times out at night.
If I see what looks like a Tgirl late at night and a store or gas station I keep my eyes out for any trouble.
Years ago I was buying gas late at night and two guys were giving me some grief and yes I was pretty scared but an older man stepped in and ran the two guys off.
He may have been a CD himself or an admirer who knows? I'm glad he was there.

[linda allen]

The hope, I would think, is that when you go out, nobody will know that you're a "sister". That's the test. I would probably fail this test, but I try to keep moving so nobody can study me.

I can only remember once in my life seeing someone I thought for sure was a crossdresser or transsexual and that was at a drugstore where she was asking the SA for makeup help (and the SA declined to help). That was 20 years ago, more or less. Perhaps five years ago, I saw someone who might have been a crossdresser, but I didn't want to follow her around the store staring at her.

Either there are not a lot of crossdressers out and about in my area or I'm just not that observant.

[Leah Lynn]

Last Saturday I was shopping enfemme. While looking through Burlington Coat Factory, I spotted two sisters. One was enfemme, the other in drab. He was looking at a rack across from me, and he seemed rather embarassed when he asked me about sizing and how to convert male to female sizes. As he (in drab) was looking at tops, I suggested a size and pointed to the dressing rooms. While he was there, I made a selection and left.

Leah

[heatherdress]

Very nice, Tracii. Glad to read your story. You handled the encounter perfectly.

[Rogina B]

Like Lynn Marie suggested..hand her a "contact card"...I hope you do this next time as she could have become a great friend. I don't let people "from the same playground" get away so easily as there is always a pen and paper in my bag...try it,you'll like it!

[Tracii G]

I may make some business cards up for my femme side that is a great idea thanks!
I need to make some for my guy side so why not do some for her?
Awesome idea.

[gigikaye]

I never have gone out en femme but often go out shopping in drab with all the underthings, including a bra and cami and pantyhose. My only experience with meeting a sister was in the lingerie dept. She also was en drab but clearly was allowing her cami and stockings to show. I did want so much to talk with her and share shopping comments but did not do so. Maybe next time.

[Maria 60]

A few weeks back my wife also stated to me that if I ever wanted to go out in public that of course it would be obvious because we never see many. Only one time last year was the only time I seen two sisters in a tourist area. If you go to a certain area in our downtown we can find many there but not at the mall or grocery stores in our area.

[AmyGaleRT]

Always carry a "ladies business card" with your picture on it with you. Have them made or make them up yourself. Include your email address, cell number, and maybe your Flickr or Facebook site. You meet someone you like, and you can exchange cards.

I have something like that, Lynn...I have "calling cards" that I made up and printed, using some Avery inkjet-printable business card stock. In the middle they say, in an elegant font:

Amy Gale Ruth Tapie
Lady in Training

and at the bottom have my E-mail address, Facebook page, and my username on this site.

- Amy

[Tracii G]

Darn I have have to try another program for cards my old cards were done on my old HD that crashed a few years back.
Amy what program are you using for your cards?

[Princess Chantal]

In the last few years, I find it quite rare to go a month without seeing a fellow sister going about her ways here in Winnipeg. Most often it is someone transitioning going about their everyday life and crossdressers taking their late night walks/drives. I use my judgement on who to approach and what to chat about. I've made a few good acquaintances, one being a cd that I initially met on her shaky first time out at McDonald's during the early morning hours. She became a regular there and had become friends with a few of the regular clientelle since. I always stopped at that McDonald's for a coffee stop during work, so she hasn't seen me in gurl mode untiil just 2 weeks ago.

[AmyGaleRT]

Tracii, I use an old copy of MS Publisher. So old, in fact, that it won't run right on Windows 7 and I have to run it in a virtual machine. I'm sure there are newer programs that will work, but I used what I had on hand.

- Amy

[Beverley Sims]

That is a pleasant way to be busted and I hope you meet again, for coffee.

[Jenn A116]

Always carry a "ladies business card" with your picture on it with you. Have them made or make them up yourself. Include your email address, cell number, and maybe your Flickr or Facebook site. You meet someone you like, and you can exchange cards.

I love this idea. I don't know why it never occurred to me before since I already have different cards for various other interests of my life; Disney, Ham Radio, Retired life... Off to play with a new design!

[DW]

Darn I have have to try another program for cards my old cards were done on my old HD that crashed a few years back.
Amy what program are you using for your cards?

I use DesignPro software from Avery Dennison. It is a free download from their website.

[Lorileah]

I can't keep cards in my purse. I make 20...then they are gone. :)

Just yesterday a GG said "good morning" to me in the parking lot...I had to look to see what I was wearing...I was 50/50 as Tracii says...but usually no one speaks to anyone here. :thinking: maybe she saw some leftover make up or something. Now the other 100 people in the grocery store didn't even see me....I know this because they kept parking their carts in front of me or pushing me out of their way when they wanted to look at stuff I was looking at. :idontknow:

I use Boderbund software for cards...It was 9.99 :)

[Princess Grandpa]

Males are conditioned to understand that eye contact is a challenge and should be done very sparingly. It is a habit that we need to let go of in the pursuit of a feminine presentation.

Something I hadn't considered. A point I must consider more.

Hug
Rita

[Jocee]

Great store... I see girls all the time who are out and about, but always when I am in drabs. As has been rehashed here, I'm so reluctant to say anything at all. However, given the interaction you two had, I would have asked if she had time for a cup of coffee. Hopefully you meet her again..... I some how thing she will be back in the same store, next Friday at roughly the same time.....

Joanna

[DonniDarkness]

Go to Vistaprint.com

Its like $10 bucks for 500 cards and youll have them in a few days. They have a complete program you can use online to create cards and you can upload your own photos to use on the card. I have two businesses and I'm a geek, but i still use vistaprint because of the quality of the printing.

-Donni-

[Stevie]

I thought I saw a sister when I was in Chicago. There was also a couple of people talking about gay rights asking for support. I will admit with my family present I was afraid to interact. But seeing people out in public did give me some inside though.