Date!!!

[Jenny CD]

Okay... So I just got back from my first date as Jenny!!! Oh my GOD! I was so freaking nervous. Okay, so he is a complete gentleman. Wasn't boastful, arrogant, a tranny chaser... He said he just wanted to spend a little time with a cute woman. I told him that I am Bi and a CD. He was okay with that. He took me to a popular restaurant where we ate and had a couple of drinks and good conversation. Wow, I was so excited!!!

[Dawn]

Congratulations Jenny! That's wonderful hun. Now the question is......are you going to see him again?

[Jenny CD]

Yeah, I think Jenny is. He is really cute, down to Earth, good job, so very nice. I guess we will see! I'm so freaking nervous, though!!! Never done this before!!!

[Princess Grandpa]

Hug

That's awesome! Living life.

Hug
Rita

[ArleneRaquel]

Jenny,
Thank you for sharing your lovely & endearing story.

[JuliaC]

Id love to be able to experience a date as a girl!

[Barbara Ella]

Great for you Jenny, and thanks for sharing. Really do hope this works out and you two go out more.

Barbara

[Rachelakld]

Good on you Jenny, don't be nervous, life is about having fun.

[Cindy M]

Sounds exciting. Thanks for sharing. Keep us updated

Cindy

[rocketscientist]

So, what did you wear on your date?

[Beverley Sims]

Jenny,
Sometimes dreams do come true,
I hope they do for you.

[vikki2020]

Nice! So, what did you wear? :)

[Jenny CD]

Oh, okay... So, I wore a cute little casual and fun black skirt, two inch open toed heels, and a white blouse that covered up my ugly lion tattoo. I shoulda taken a picture! Anyway, I dressed pretty casual as it was a lunch date. BTW, he called and wants to take me to a movie. I said "The Conjuring"? His voice kinda shook and he said he doesn't watch scary movies! I love them! Strike one! Naw, J/K!!!

[Lorileah]

he is a complete gentleman. Wasn't boastful, arrogant, took me to a popular restaurant where we ate and had a couple of drinks and good conversation.

Sounds like a keeper. We don't have to tell you to be careful do we? Guys can break your heart quickly. And now a movie! I respect any man who will take you to dinners or movies.

[nethiker55]

Good for you Jenny, that is sooo exciting happy it went well. Don't hold the scary movie thing against him he sounds wonderful otherwise, so enjoy

[jenni_xx]

Did you tell him that you're bi and a cd on your date, or before you met?

Also, in a subsequent post, you referred to "Jenny" in the third person. Is that how you see "Jenny" - as someone separate to your own identity?

[rocketscientist]

Did you tell him that you're bi and a cd on your date, or before you met?

Ummm...didn't you read the OP?

[monalisa]

Good for you Jenny. Something we think or fantasize about and you are living and experiencing going out on dates as a woman. Keep us advised as to how it is going.

[Jorja]

Isn't life great, Jenny? I am glad you had a good time. I hope there are many more to come.

[Cheryl Ann Owens]

Jenny! This is something I've always dreamed of! Yes, I am married to an awesome lady but if I were single I'd love to be in your shoes. Now don't let that goodnight kiss escalate into something more unless you're ready! LOL! There is nothing wrong about this! Just BE yourself.

Cheryl

[Jenny CD]

Also, in a subsequent post, you referred to "Jenny" in the third person. Is that how you see "Jenny" - as someone separate to your own identity?

Yeah, I do that. It kinda became a habit referring to Jenny in the third person. Honestly don't know why I started doing that. But, I'm dressing as Jenny more and more often. I started HRT a few weeks ago and I guess my identity is slowly changing to Jenny on a more permanent basis. I mean it's pretty obvious that I'm femme.... I wear nail polish to work and such. And I deal with the public daily. No one has really said anything. Looking forward to the day when I can wear a nice skirt suit to work! I feel it's just around the corner.... As long as the ghosts leave me alone!!! LOL!!! Guess I have to actually BUY a skirt suit or two, as well. Most of my femme clothes are casual with short skirts. Not good business attire!

Anyway, back to Paul... I'm really excited about this Friday! He's going to pick me up and take me to movie, then dinner. What do I eat though? Salad? Or should I put a feed bag on my face and go to town?!?!?

[prene]

Nice story.
Sounds safe and fun.
I have never dated a guy.
How did it end?
Did you hug goodbye, kiss on the cheek, shake hands?

I would love to just to see what it is like to be a girl on a date.
But I am still looking for a accepting gg.

[sherri]

I wouldn't order salad for dinner, but I would keep it light, easy to eat (no spaghetti!) and not too expensive unless he steers you that way. If he knows the place well he might recommend something while chatting about the menu. I sometimes like to reciprocate by buying the pre-dinner drinks at the bar, or maybe pop in someplace on the way home to treat him to coffee or dessert.

If you keep dating, sooner or later he's gonna make a move, right? Are you okay with that? If not, I wouldn't exploit his generosity. I'm not suggesting you would, just sayin.

[windycissy]

You go girl! The fact that he called you up and asked you out again is awesome, well played! He's hooked, now reel him in nice and slow and enjoy every moment along the way...remember that you have one huge edge over every woman he's ever met: you really know what makes a guy feel great - call it inside information : )

[Jenny CD]

Nice story.

How did it end?
Did you hug goodbye, kiss on the cheek, shake hands?

Well, he walked me to my door and we said our goodbyes with a hug and then he kissed my hand at the door. (Tee, hee) I felt like a high school girl! I didn't know how to react!

[Tina B.]

Jenny, you did know how to act, just like a high school girl! I don't think I would let his being afraid of scary movies slow you down.
A man that will treat you like a lady, a nice lady, and he enjoys your company, and he took you to a popular restaurant means he likes being seen with a good look woman on his arm, sweetie, I'd hang on tight, and just see where this adventure is going to take you.
Keep us posted, a lot of girls dream of finding themselves in that place.

[Tracii G]

Oooo how cool!!
Reel him in slowly GF LOL.
Been there done that a few times and yes it is awesome having a good looking man on your arm. :D:thumbsup::hugs:

[rita63]

Like many here I dream of a date someday and understand your giddy girlishness, it must have been such a thrill. I would love to dance with a man and laugh with him.
Keep us posted we are all eager to hear.

hugs rita

[DanielleT]

There is nothing so much fun, so fulfilling to us as women, as to be hit on or danced with by men. I love being the woman that I am and everything that goes with that.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Jenny, It sounds like you are his little piece of Arm Candy it sounds like you are having fun , Just be careful.

[Nicole Erin]

Well, it sounds like things are going well.
Next step - see if the dates are at least semi-regular. You also understand that at some point, men do want sex.
So a couple more dates, a roll in the hay, and whatever
After that, it is up to destiny to decide where it goes. May be a long term FWB, more serious relationship, may be someone you are "seeing" sometimes or you two may decide it isn't gonna work and move on. No one knows yet.

You are off to a good start, whatever direction it heads. :)

[docrobbysherry]

Jenny, don't listen to anyone telling u not to be nervous. U should be nervous and that's allrite. Most of us would have no clue how to act as a woman on a date with a man. Stay within your comfort zone and eventually you'll become the natural Jenny!

[MissTee]

How did last night go, Jenny? Please share sweetie!!

[Jenny CD]

Last night was great! I was dressed casually, white denim mini-skirt (not too short) and a pink blouse, just got some new and really cute sandals that went well with the outfit. I felt really cute! Paul was wearing kaki Dockers with a white polo shirt and the watch on his arm was stunning. He looked cute. Anyway, he took me to a 60's style restaurant that was packed! I was so nervous. Maybe it was me... but no one really gave us a second glance. Even when I went to the bathroom. A little surprised, but thankful. I ordered the chicken salad... Really, I wasn't too hungry. Paul just had a cheese-burger. It looked good, too. So, after dinner I talked him into seeing "The Conjuring". He was relunctant, but he went... What a scary friggen movie! Oh my gosh!! Scarier than the Grudge! I kept grabbing Paul's arm during the scary parts, I had chills like a little girl through out the movie!!! And again, it didn't seem like anyone paid any attention to us. What a great feeling. So after we got scared halfway to death he took me to a nice little club downtown for a couple of drinks and conversation. He did try to make a move on me, but I told him I wasn't ready for that. He was a total gentleman... I guess around midnight he brought me home, I gave him a hug and kiss on the cheek. He didn't try to force himself on me or anything. He told me that he just likes my company, sense of humor and (tee-hee) my beauty (BLUSH!!!). He called me this morning to ask if I slept well, how sweet. He's treating me to lunch tomorrow. So, would that be considered the third date rule? (BLUSHING)

[paulaprimo]

wow, this is getting serious! good for you jenny, enjoy!! so whats new with the casino guy??

[AmyGaleRT]

Jenny, you are living the dream, no doubt about that! I always have Sabrina's feelings to consider, but I would love to have a man take me out and treat me like a lady, at least once. Just to have the experience!

Usually, I'm told, the fourth date is kind of the "sexual watershed," where, if the spark is there, that's where it will happen. I'm not saying that you have to keep Paul at arm's length, or you have to nail him to the ground, but, if you enjoy his company, don't be afraid to let things develop, to whatever point you feel comfortable with. But maintain control of the situation. Remember, as a woman, you have great power over men if you choose to exercise it, and, just like in Spider-Man, "With great power comes great responsibility."

Also remember Miss Manners' outline of dating: there should always be food, entertainment, and affection. Initially, it's more focused on the entertainment, not so much on the affection. In subsequent dates, the entertainment can be scaled back, while the affection is ramped up a bit. When the affection becomes the entertainment, we no longer call that "dating." But under no circumstances should you omit the food. :)

- Amy

[Jenny CD]

You are so smart AMY!!!

[MissTee]

Great update, Jenny! Good luck to you and your new relationship.

[Emma500]

Hi Jenny,

In my experience, by about now the guy is hoping that things will start to go further. He sounds great.

[Jenny CD]

Hi Jenny,

In my experience, by about now the guy is hoping that things will start to go further. He sounds great.

Fair enough... but, I'm so new to the "dating scene", I don't know how to behave on a 3rd or 4th date!

Somebody please help!!!

[Emma500]

Hi Jenny,

I think you just need to do whatever feels right to you honey. For me, I like it when a guy is really romantic. The main thing is don't let him go too fast!, take things at a pace that suits you. If he is a decent guy. I think he will understand

[Jenny CD]

Went to lunch today. What a good time! I feel weird telling ya'll, but I became very attracted to Paul. He's very good looking, dresses nice and treats me like a lady. What is the deal with him?!!?!? Is he really attracted to me or my female persona which is becoming me on a more day to day basis. Is it the fantasy thing being with a CD/T-gurl? I don't know. I hate to think of the negativity about all this... But, I can't help it. Anyway, he was again the perfect gentleman, didn't push himself on me or anything. But I did give him a gentle kiss goodbye. His strong hand on the small of my back was intoxicating. Thought about asking him in, but then changed my mind when I was about to open my mouth to speak. Got nervous!!! So, that was today. Hopefully I can bring more good news!

[Tracii G]

He sounds like an awesome date!!
Yeah I'm jealous LOL. :tongueout

[Maria in heels]

Jenny....It sounds like you are having a wonderful time, and so far, Paul is the wonderful person who you are getting to know. As in any relationship, it takes time to build, so I think that there isn't a 3 or 4 date rule...just do what you feel right for yourself, not for him. If you feel comfortable, by all means, lead in the "dance" and enjoy yourself.

[Mollyanne]

Yeah, I do that. It kinda became a habit referring to Jenny in the third person. Honestly don't know why I started doing that. But, I'm dressing as Jenny more and more often. I started HRT a few weeks ago and I guess my identity is slowly changing to Jenny on a more permanent basis. I mean it's pretty obvious that I'm femme.... I wear nail polish to work and such. And I deal with the public daily. No one has really said anything. Looking forward to the day when I can wear a nice skirt suit to work! I feel it's just around the corner.... As long as the ghosts leave me alone!!! LOL!!! Guess I have to actually BUY a skirt suit or two, as well. Most of my femme clothes are casual with short skirts. Not good business attire!

Anyway, back to Paul... I'm really excited about this Friday! He's going to pick me up and take me to movie, then dinner. What do I eat though? Salad? Or should I put a feed bag on my face and go to town?!?!?

NEVER NEVER NEVER PUT "THE FEED BAG" ON!!!!!! Girls don't do that!!!!!! Dine conservatively and ladylike!!!!!!

Molly

[monalisa]

Sounds like you are getting closer and closer to the intimate moment. You have us all sitting on the edge of our seats waiting for the next date.

[Jenny CD]

Jenny....It sounds like you are having a wonderful time, and so far, Paul is the wonderful person who you are getting to know. As in any relationship, it takes timronge to build, so I think that there isn't a 3 or 4 date rule...just do what you feel right for yourself, not for him. If you feel comfortable, by all means, lead in the "dance" and enjoy yourself.

I guess that is the problem, Maria. I don't know HOW to lead in the dance. Don't get me wrong, I've been with a man before. But this is different. I really like him and I don't want to ruin it by doing something stupid or rushing into something, if that makes sense. I could really use ya'lls help! I mean, IF I feel comfortable enough to take the next step, HOW?!?!? Gosh, I feel like a silly high-school girl with a crush!

As a male, I didn't have this problem. I knew how to behave. This is all brand new to me...

[Trishpdxcd2]

Well sweetie, just do what feels comfortable. He will undoubtedly ask you out again and hopefully it will be a romantic date and you will know when it feels right. If you are comfortable just be affectionate which will let him know you are open to him progressing further.

[Jenny CD]

Well sweetie, just do what feels comfortable. He will undoubtedly ask you out again and hopefully it will be a romantic date and you will know when it feels right. If you are comfortable just be affectionate which will let him know you are open to him progressing further.

Okay... So let me ask... When we exit the car I reach for his hand, we hold hands into the restaurant or whatever, he opens the door for me and puts his hand on my lower back to escort me in. At the movies I kept grabbing his arm, and we walked out holding hands. Am I moving to fast? He's been nothing but nice, and I want to progress I just don't know how.

BTW Trish... Nice legs!

[sherri]

I think you're thinkin' too much. :-) If you wanna take it up a notch, just give him a signal, he'll take it from there.

[Cheryl Ann Owens]

I'm thinking that this would make a great reality / mini-series! Naw, probably never happen but the private audience here is enjoying it and probably living vicariously through you Jenny! LOL! It's like reading someone's diary. Seriously, this could be the beginning of an awesome relationship. I wish you the best!

Cheryl Ann

[Jenny CD]

I'm thinking that this would make a great reality / mini-series! Naw, probably never happen but the private audience here is enjoying it and probably living vicariously through you Jenny! LOL! It's like reading someone's diary. Seriously, this could be the beginning of an awesome relationship. I wish you the best!

Cheryl Ann

Tee-hee!!! I didn't think of it that way! Also, Sherri said if I wanted to take it up a notch, just give him a signal. What signal!?!? As a guy, I know... But as Jenny no clue. That's why I'm coming to you gals for help. I'm lost!

[Cheryl Ann Owens]

Jenny, Sherry said to take it up a notch, and you've already given him a gentle kiss. Maybe a more passionate lingering kiss the next time? A tighter hug included? Look deeply into his eyes after the kiss with a warm mellow smile. I think that could lead to something.

Cheryl Ann

[Jenny CD]

Jenny, Sherry said to take it up a notch, and you've already given him a gentle kiss. Maybe a more passionate lingering kiss the next time? A tighter hug included? Look deeply into his eyes after the kiss with a warm mellow smile. I think that could lead to something.

Cheryl Ann

Warm, mellow smile.... I like that.

[ruthie801]

I checked out some of the pictures you posted previously, your a real doll he's lucky to be going out with you.

[Jenny CD]

I checked out some of the pictures you posted previously, your a real doll he's lucky to be going out with you.

Ohhh.... Thank you Ruth! What a way to start my day!

[paulaprimo]

i've been following also. i still want to know what happened to the guy from the casino, does he still e-mail you??

[MatildaJ.]

Not sure if this is out of line, but in my experience, many guys get really excited to have something that seems just out of reach. They like the challenge. Not all guys, but many of the ones on dating sites. They really want to have sex with the person they've been corresponding with or meeting. But once they've had sex once with a particular woman, they may get more distracted by new women, who pose a new challenge.

It's really easy to get carried away on the cloud of romance and "new relationship energy." But there's no way to tell a guy's long-term intentions until after you've been dating and having sex for a while. That's just the way it goes, at least in my experience.

Other things that come to mind:

if you're not ready for sex, it's a lot easier to control how the evening ends when it ends on your doorstep than when you invite him in. But if you do invite him in, it's a lot easier to avoid sex if you keep all your clothes on. It is of course your right to refuse sex at any stage in the game; even after sex has started you can say you want him to get off of you and legally he has to listen to you. But as someone who has been there... having the legal right to say 'no' is different from being confident enough to insist on your 'no' and make it stick.

Conversely, if you do want sex, the best way is to be confident and talk about it. After some passionate kissing, you can say "I want to have sex with you." That really helps clear up any confusion :-) And it also helps lead into that conversation about condoms and STIs -- very important before you have sex.

[Jenny CD]

The guy from the casino is history in my mind! I've become infatuated with Paul. Too soon? He's just so handsome and nice. I understand that all men (me included) want sex at some point in the relationship. Just how long do I wait? How long is too long? And, if we... you know... does that make me a **** if it's too early? Sorry for the language! I would just like some answers!

[AmyGaleRT]

Jenny, my Amy-self is going "OMG WOW!!! (swoon)" right about now. (Meanwhile, my male half is thinking, "Well, this is interesting. I can empathize with Jenny as a woman." But never mind him. :) )

It seems like you're really falling for Paul! There's no reason why you shouldn't; he's a perfect gentleman and it sounds like both of you are OK with how things have been going so far. So don't go all "analysis paralysis" on us, girlfriend! Let whatever happens, happen! And we'll all be DYING to hear how it turns out! :hugs:

- Amy

[Ressie]

I'm wondering, are you speaking in your female voice this whole time?

[Jenny CD]

I'm wondering, are you speaking in your female voice this whole time?

Trying to, Dee. It's hard to keep it up, though. My male voice does come out and then I'll catch myself.

[DanielleT]

I could write volumes on this topic. I am very much a woman and I am very much into men. As the moderators here tend to be a bit sensitive, just drop me a note and I will share more.

[rita63]

Jenny, Don't worry about being a **** if your relationship takes on a sexual aspect. You will just be a person falling in love and doing what comes naturally. Like any relationship expect some ups and downs. Best of luck to you, enjoy yourself and follow your' heart.

hugs rita

[Girl]

Jenny, it sounds like you have found a wonderful man! Congratulations! You deserve it, you're very pretty. He's the lucky one!

[Jenny CD]

Thanks a bunch ladies. All of you have been boosting my confidence these last couple of weeks and I am so grateful to you.

Soooo... Going out tomorrow night. He's taking me to a play that one of his friends is in. OMG! Two things cross my mind... Most important, am I going to be introduced into his circle of friends? I would totally freak out if he took me back stage. I mean, I think I look cute, but I don't think I really pass. What if he gets embarrassed to be seen with me? What if his friends tease him? Gawd, I seriously need to talk to him about all the 'what ifs' tonight. And second, what the heck do I wear? Formal black dress (the one I have is cute and above the knee) or more of a colorful casual outfit? The theatre is downtown and is relatively small, walked by it a couple of times in the past. According to Paul, there was only about 30 people in attendance on opening night. How embarrassing would it be if I dressed formal and there were only a few in the theatre? I've never been to a play like this, lost. What do ya'll think?

[Cheryl Ann Owens]

Jenny, it would be best to talk to Paul about all of your concerns to get you some guidance. Yes, you want to be dressed for the occasion so you might ask him what he has seen before to help you with a decision on an outfit. I certainly hope his associates won't give him any garbage but I think if you present yourself well with confidence it should go well. Just be sure to address these "what-ifs" with him to gauge his comfort level too.

Other than that, have a GREAT time!

Cheryl

[jenni_xx]

Oh for crying out loud Jenny, just go with your own instincts!!! I mean that in a good way - a roll your eyes, stop worrying about it, and just get on with it - kind of way. :)

It' sex. The biggest deal any of us make out of that is the one that plays out in our minds. Never in reality. Sex. Happens every minute of every day. My only advice to you would be to just be with Paul, go with your feelings, that's YOUR feelings, no one else's, and do what's right for YOU. Or in other words, take it at a pace that YOU feel comfortable with, while in the back of your mind reminding yourself - this isn't as big a deal as I feel it has to be.

Or to put that in shorthand - just go and enjoy yourself girl. Wanting sex, having sex, never, EVER, made anyone a ****.

[AmyGaleRT]

Jenny, I agree with Cheryl. Ask Paul what he's seen female audience members wear, that'll give you some guidance. Personally, I'd go with the LBD (I have a dress a lot like that in my closet!), but that's just me.

As for "wanting" anything from him sexually...you don't have to "go all the way" with him just because it's the fourth date, you know. You could just engage in an intense make-out session with him on the couch, IF you feel like doing so. By "sexual watershed," I think the book I read about this in was just saying that by around about the fourth date is often when a couple establishes that there's a sexual "spark" in the relationship, which need not involve actually "doing it."

Just be yourself, enjoy yourself, and let whatever happens happen. (And then come back here and dish, girlfriend! :) )

- Amy

[Jenny CD]

Thanks girls. Ya'll are the sweetest people on Earth! So encouraging, so thoughtful, so accepting, so wonderful. Gawd, I wish all of us lived next door to each other!!!

Honestly ladies... right now it's not about sex. I'm truly concerned about meeting his friend or friends. I' FREEAAAKKKINNNG terrified! I talked to him tonight and he's like "don't worry, don't worry, don't worry). But I can't help it, Im worried. Most of ya'll wont even read this before we go out... but for those that do, what do I do?

[Cheryl Ann Owens]

Jenny, I hope I'm writing this in time. Worry can be a natural reaction in many situations though this is a lot different. (I worry probably too much about many things. It prevents me from going out dressed.) He seems to have stressed the "don't worry" part thus I detect he is very comfortable being with you around his friends. Remember that theater groups are very diverse people and probably very accepting of anything. This I've learned from a friend who dated a Broadway actress. In my case I've been in situations where I was worried to death and after it was over, I realized that I worried for nothing. Just be confident and stop obsessing over the "what ifs." I hope this helps. There's very llittle than can cure some worry and anxiety.

Cheryl Ann

[Ressie]

You're just gonna have to be prepared to honestly answer any questions that come up. What questions might his friends ask you? Having good answers prepared will help you to relax and be confident.

[paulaprimo]

relax girl!! i have a feeling we are going to hear you say, "i don't know why i was so nervous"...obviously he is okay with you
and to bring you around his friends i would dare to say maybe even proud of you and wants to show you off!!
so relax, enjoy and have a great time :)

[ruthie801]

omg It must be wonderful being you now

[Jenny CD]

He's on his way to pick me up!!! So nervous!

Decided to go very casual because Paul said that it is a very casual theatre. So, denim skirt, peach top and some cute sandals I picked up today, light makeup and hair in a ponytail.

So, off I go... OMG nervous about meeting his friends!

[Jenny CD]

Just got back... And I'm crying my eyes out. Not because of Paul. He was great, such a gentleman. But his "friend" asked me how much for a BJ. I didn't tell Paul, but he knew something was wrong. Why would Timothy think I was a hooker or something? I'm so upset about this. I wanted to have a good time, which it was until that. Paul and I walked in, nothing seemed out of the ordinary. Had a glass of wine in the lobby before the play, it was great. Saw the play, which I thought was completely silly. Then Paul took my hand and walked me back stage. I was on cloud nine! He introduced me to a few people, no big deal (although I WAS nervous). Paul had to go to the bathroom... Timothy. I hate him.

[kathtx]

Jenny, I am so sorry to hear that one of Paul's friends turned out to be a creep (to put it mildly).

Talk to Paul and let him know one of is "friends" is a creep who propositioned you in the most insulting possible way.

[Jenny CD]

I know... It ruined the night for me. So disappointed.

[ArleneRaquel]

Such a sad happening, the creep is a blight and should be taught a lesson on what being a man is really about. Hugs darlin.

[Jenny CD]

I'm so upset over what happened last night. Didn't sleep a wink. Gawd, why do people think that just because we are trying to be ourselves we are ****s or hookers? Paul prolly thinks I don't like him because I asked him to bring me home. Just gave him a kiss on the cheek. It wasn't his fault. But, I was so very hurt. Apparently, this "creep" has been one of Paul's best friends since they were kids. That's why I didn't say anything to him.

[Cheryl Ann Owens]

Jenny, I am SO sorry too! I can only imagine your hurt. First of all, remember that everyone else treated you with respect, except one jerk. I'd bet you looked very conservative with your outfit and did NOT look in the way this creep perceived you. He certainly doesn't seem to be Paul's friend if he asked you that stupid question.

I can't tell you what to do. I don't know if you should tell Paul because there could be other repercussions. I don't know if you should remain quiet either. Either way you were deeply hurt. I hope you can either resolve this on your own or with Paul. It's too bad you encountered this jerk who spoiled an otherwise fine evening.

HUGGGS!!!!!
Cheryl

PS--EDIT---Jenny, don't EVER let someone control how you feel---old advice........

[Jennifer Marie P.]

That's so cool Jenny have fun.

[Leah Lynn]

Jenny, I understand your dilemma. You probably should tell Paul something. Perhaps just that the "creep" didn't appear to like you, or something. I would only divulge the facts if he asks for them. No matter what, you can't let him assume that everything is okay. He could plan more outings including the dork. That would be unacceptable.

I do hope things work out for you. A sweet guy doesn't come along that often. Hugs,

Leah

[Jenny CD]

I just got off the phone with Paul. He knew something was bothering me so he simply asked and I told him what happened. He's pissed at Timothy. Gawd, I hope this doesn't ruin their friendship. They seemed to have so much fun together until the ugly event. Paul apologized for his friend, but I told him the apology was not his to make. He felt terrible about the stupid proposition. I hate Timothy.

On a happy side note, Paul is picking me for breakfast tomorrow. Think I'll wear those new white shorts I picked up with some flip-flops! Hmmm, should I wear the turquoise blouse or the hot-pink one? Decisions, decisions...

[calebsmithxd]

Jenny, I'm glad to hear the conversation with Paul went well. He sounds great.

[whowhatwhen]

Look at it this way, he's better off if he loses him as a friend.
What kind of sick, twisted human being asks his friend's girlfriend out of the blue for a blowjob?

Good to hear that you're enjoying your time with your new bf though.
:)

[Jenny CD]

Good to hear that you're enjoying your time with your new bf though.
:)

You know, you're right! What kind of friend is he!?!?!?!

You made me giggle! I think I have a boyfriend! Didn't even think about that!!!

[Dana L]

Look at it this way, he's better off if he loses him as a friend.
What kind of sick, twisted human being asks his friend's girlfriend out of the blue for a blowjob?

Good to hear that you're enjoying your time with your new bf though.
:)
That is totally true! Hope all is good. You have us all hanging on the edge of our seats. This is better than romance novel!

[MandyLee]

Hi Jenny, He sure does sound like a keeper, You should greet him with a nice hug and kiss next time you meet and thank him for being so sweet to you. If he's your boyfriend let him know it doesn't mean you have to jump in to bed. I sure hope you give him and your self a chance to see what kind of Girlfriend you'll make I'm betting you both could be a happy couple.

[whowhatwhen]

You made me giggle! I think I have a boyfriend! Didn't even think about that!!!

That made me smile IRL.
:)

[Nicole Erin]

The guy who asked for a BJ probably didn't do it to insult you. He is probably some geekazoid who just has no idea how to act in public.

[Maria in heels]

Jenny....
Paul should understand that it was HIS friend that did this, and it is a real insult to you. I am sure that Paul will make this up to you, and he should apologize for his friend..there are those magic words "his friend". It means a lot if Paul tries to make this up to you, as he should. Friend or no friend, it just was totally rude and crude what Timothy did to you.

[AmyGaleRT]

OMGWTFBBQ! Jenny, girl, that was no ordinary creeper, that was Creepasaurus Rex! I'd have been to tempted to just kick him right you-know-where if I were in your place, but I think I'd probably try my best to not say anything, just look at him as if he were something I'd just scraped off the bottom of my shoe. You know, go total "ice queen" on him.

Timothy is scum, but in a way that makes me want to apologize to scum for comparing it to him! :eek:

At least Paul is standing up for his lady! That ranks him high in my book. I hope you enjoy your next time out with him!

- Amy

[rocketscientist]

Glad your back on track Jenny. Would love to see some pics of your outfits. Sounds like your having a blast. Keep us posted. Hugs,Tonya

[Sandygal]

Hi Jenny...I hope your thread continues...it is very interesting to live through you on your first experiences. If it was a movie, I would be on the edge of my seat, hoping you have a wonderful ending.

[Jenny CD]

Going out again tonight. He asked me to dress nice. What does that MEAN???? Black dress and heels? Going for a facial today, getting the brows done. Of course shaving everything on my body. But.... I'm scared. Because I think I'm ready for the next step. Paul has been the sweetest person, protective, handsome, so nice... everything a girl would want in a man. But, I'm still nervous. Can't get over this feeling. Just thinking about tonight makes my heart jump! What if I mess it up? What if I go too fast? What IS too fast? What if he doesn't like me when the clothes come off, if they come off? Oh gawd....

[Cheryl Ann Owens]

Jenny, stop with the "what if's" !! LOL! Maybe you're making yourself nervous because of them? I know you're excited and want it to go well---typical woman! LOL! So far Paul has already been a fine gentleman, and I'm sure he'll help you feel comfortable. You might want to ask him what he meant about dressing nice by asking what kind of occasion it will be. Formal, Semi-formal, etc.? Meanwhile enjoy the facial and all!!! Think about just having fun!

Cheryl

[Jenny CD]

I know!!! Just nervous. But, I got my facial. Wonderful!! Got my brows waxed... they even did my nails. Feeling very good right now. So, I'm wearing my little black dress and looking forward to where Paul is taking me. OMG!!! So excited!!!

[Jenny CD]

What a night!!! Paul took me to the casino first! Didn't win anything, awwww.... Then we went to a private party at a business partner's house. OMG!!! Paul seemed so proud to be seen with me. I just felt like a guy in a dress!!! Oh Lord... what have I got myself into? Everybody was so nice... maybe they sensed that I was terrified?!?!? Again, Paul was the perfect gentleman. When he dropped me off I hugged him close and we had a passionate kiss (giggle)!!! Gawd, I wanted to ask him in... I just didn't know how. I'm so silly. Could have just took his hand and brought him in. But, he is such the gentleman that there was no pressure. He knows I'm scared. sooo... blushing....

[Kelly Smith]

Gawd, I wanted to ask him in... I just didn't know how. I'm so silly.

After the kiss, smile and casually say "Would you like to come in?" He will say, "Sure", "Yes", "i would love to" or something similar. It really is that easy.

[Cheryl Ann Owens]

What Kelly said. And it could be as simple as having coffee or a glass of wine and watching TV together sitting closely on the couch. Even then, it doesn't necessarily mean it would lead into anything more intimate.

Cheryl

[Jenny CD]

I know! It was just happening and I froze! I froze! I wanted to invite him in... I even bought some Merlot and two brand new wine glasses. I shouldn't be nervous around him, he's the sweetest. But I can't help myself!

[Marleena]

Jenny this is a cute thread. You're so innocent and acting like a teenage girl on her first date. You're being a real lady the way you are handling this.:)

[Jenny CD]

I do feel like a teenage girl... It's so weird to me. Like I feel flutter when he's holding my hand while talking to friends. Or when he's leading me through the crowd with his hand on the small of my back. Or when he whispers a little information about someone in my ear. Oh gosh... fluttering just thinking about it!!! I guess he really does like me! Totally freaking out!

[Maria in heels]

Jenny...its truly wonderful that you found Paul, and how he treats and respects you is even more beautiful. Its really great that you are getting to decide and not rushing into things..

[AmyGaleRT]

OMG Jenny! I'm just thrilled to death for you! :D Yes, ask him in next time. It doesn't have to lead to anything X-rated, just maybe some cuddling and passionate smooching on the couch. Remember, you're always in control!

Paul is SUCH a wonderful gentleman, the Amy part of me is swooning just reading about him! :) I don't think I could be any more emphatic when I say: Keep that one!

And please keep dishing the updates!

- Amy

[Jenny CD]

So, it's 2am. Paul just left. Tee-hee! I'm so embarrassed.... but, it was magical! OMG! He was so gentle, so kind, so everything I thought he would be. So embarrassed talking about our night!!! But, I'm on cloud nine and just can't help myself! OMG! Can't believe I'm about to click that little icon!!!!

[Jenny CD]

Oh Lord... Do I sound like a cheap you know what? Should have made him wait. But, I couldn't... so attracted to the man! Wanted to jump his bones the first time I saw him!. Why do I feel guilty? Seriously, why do I feel guilty?

[AmyGaleRT]

OMG WOW Jenny! I'm so happy for you!

If you can't talk openly about it, you can always PM me the details. Think of it as a slumber party, and I'm sitting here in my pale pink tricot nightie and white satin slippers waiting to hear from you! ('Cause I actually am wearing that LOL :D )

- Amy

[Kelly Smith]

Should have made him wait.
It sounds like you did.

[monalisa]

Sounds like a happy ending and beginning at the same time. You have kept us on the edge of our seats waiting for it to happen and now it did and was wonderful. So nice to hear it went well. It will now be easier as the tension is off.

[Jenny CD]

Ok... Yeah it was great! But, here's the new thing that I'm worried about. What if he wants to meet my male self? Don't know if I can do that. He's only seen me as Jenny. I really don't want him to see me as a male. (Even though he knows, obviously!) Oh, and it was really cute how he called me this morning just to ask if I slept well. Of course I did!!!

[Marleena]

Well it sounds like you have a real gentleman there Jenny. It sounds like things went well too. He'll probably have to see the real you at some point but don't sweat it. It's too early in the relationship for that. If he pressures you you can always show him pictures of when you were younger. No need to change modes if you prefer being female. Just tell him it's the old you that you'd like to put in the past. JMO.

[Leah Lynn]

Jenny, You do not sound like a cheap anything! Just a girl in love!!!! And I'm very happy for you.

As far as meeting the boy side, just say "I'm the same person, just in guy clothes!"

Hugs,
Leah

[Jenny CD]

He'll probably have to see the real you at some point but don't sweat it.


He's been dating the real me!

[Marleena]

He's been dating the real me! Yes...my bad. The old you. sorry.

[whowhatwhen]

Oh Lord... Do I sound like a cheap you know what? Should have made him wait. But, I couldn't... so attracted to the man! Wanted to jump his bones the first time I saw him!. Why do I feel guilty? Seriously, why do I feel guilty?

Relax, It's not the 50s :)
Just do what feels right and not worry about ancient morals, you waited as long as you needed to and that's all that counts.

[Emma500]

Really pleased for you Jenny, I'm looking forward to hearing how the relationship develops, best wishes

[gen8890]

Hi Jenny, silly question, but: How do you and Paul compare in height? I'm wondering if it's important to a guy dating a CD girl for him to be taller. I'm just under 6' and I like to wear heels; I always imagined I'd look UP to Mr. Right for that first kiss, but that's probably not realistic. Just wondering...

Gen

[Jenny CD]

Hi Jenny, silly question, but: How do you and Paul compare in height? I'm wondering if it's important to a guy dating a CD girl for him to be taller. I'm just under 6' and I like to wear heels; I always imagined I'd look UP to Mr. Right for that first kiss, but that's probably not realistic. Just wondering...

Gen

Well, (blush) he's about 6'2". Without heels I'm about 5'5". SO the height thing is no problem. It's weird holding hands with him as he leads me around, or opens the door for me, or when we walk into a restaurant. Just little things like that is weird because he is so tall (well to me he's tall). And yes, it was a wonderful feeling when he stood me up and put his arms around my waist... I did look up into his eyes...magical. That's all I can say.

[Jenny CD]

By the way Gen... It's NOT a silly question. I think most of us think about being with a man that is taller, stronger, etc... I think most women think that too.

[Angie G]

WOW Jenny you go girl.:hugs:
Angie

[Badtranny]

Okay, maybe I'm a little buzzed but this thread is total bunk.

You have clearly got a few closet cases sold, but those of us who have been openly dating men for awhile can plainly see that you are making this up.

How in the world is a full grown man going to be this naive about dating men. You may THINK you're a teenage girl but you are not and the "tee hee" BS totally gives you away.

[whowhatwhen]

Benefit of the doubt and such, I like to believe that uplifting stories are true until proven otherwise.
You're right though, I've never dated a man before so I literally have no idea.

It might be nice to know certain stuff for the future though, how's about a guide or something?
:)

[Zylia]

I'm glad I'm not the only one who thought this thread kind of resembled a romance novel, but I figured Jenny isn't really hurting anyone if she does happen to make this up.

If this story isn't (mostly) made up, I'm very curious about how Paul's business partners responded after you two visited that private party. There obviously is a one in a million chance you got a 100% 'passing rate' and I don't know what kind of business Paul is in in the first place, but the chance that you got read and someone responded either curiously or negatively probably is about 100%.

[Kelly Smith]

No, it doesn't add up. I'd give reasons but it would inflict pain unnecessarily.

[Juliea661]

It is said that "truth is stranger tban fiction"...
So I'm not sure whether it is one or the other - but I love every word! Such a loving innocent romantic story! And God know that in this world of violence, recession, greed, etc, we could all use a little more of such stories...
Hugs to all of you!
Jules

[jenni_xx]

Very true Juliea. If it is all fiction, then credit to Jenny for creating a story that has managed to engage so many here. Perhaps one that is tapping into the desires/wants/needs of other people who frequent these boards. As Badtranny says, perhaps more to the closeted members who are themselves secretly wishing for such desires to be fulfilled - that is, to believe in Jenny's posts is to provide them with reassurance that it may, that it can, happen to them one day. I have to say, I had my suspicions about the validity of Jenny's "situation" pretty much right from the outset, for a variety of reasons. As a gay man myself, who is in a long term relationship with an accepting partner, I replied to Jenny asking a question of when it was exactly that she told "Paul" that she was CD. Jenny never answered my question - in fact, it was only ever addressed by another member of this forum in a rather belittling way.

[Badtranny]

Hey I'm all for fantasy but there's a section for that and it starts to make me uncomfortable when I see people being taken in by what is so obviously a moist daydream. It is not possible that she isn't being read at least some of the time because almost every full time TS woman I know gets read some of the time. It's also not possible that her boyfriend's best buddy propositioned her in such a crude way without Mr Wonderful ever knowing or reacting. Also that particular story is suspiciously reminiscent of a scene in Pretty Woman.

There are real TS women all over this board who date men on the regular, and this story smells like teen spirit. teehee giggle giggle

gag me.

[jenni_xx]

The film Pretty Woman sprung to mind as soon as I read the post by Jenny in which she was propositioned by "Paul's" friend. Maybe that film sprung to mind on a "subliminal" level because of Jenny's own comments in this thread about being perceived as a "hooker".

[Kelly Smith]

Hey I'm all for fantasy but there's a section for that and it starts to make me uncomfortable when I see people being taken in by what is so obviously a moist daydream. It is not possible that she isn't being read at least some of the time because almost every full time TS woman I know gets read some of the time. It's also not possible that her boyfriend's best buddy propositioned her in such a crude way without Mr Wonderful ever knowing or reacting. Also that particular story is suspiciously reminiscent of a scene in Pretty Woman.

There are real TS women all over this board who date men on the regular, and this story smells like teen spirit. teehee giggle giggle

gag me.

Was that necessary?

[Jenny CD]

I can't believe what I'm reading. Of course I was read.... I just didn't want to think I was. Of course we got looks. Of course his business partners made comments to him. Of course I don't pass... That's not the point. I never said I did. And, in the first post I said that I made sure he understood who I was. But, he didn't care because he liked me for me. Unlike many of you, he is caring and understanding and he knew from the start that I am new to this dating scene as Jenny. Paul is a very nice gentleman and whether or not you believe this thing called my new life, I really don't care. I just wanted to share with ya'll an experience that I am truly enjoying. By the way, Paul is new to this, too. And if ya'll don't like it... Don't effin read it.

You know... it really hurts that some of you compare what Timothy asked me to a stupid movie. My heart was broken over that "situation". I was crushed and cried for hours because of it. I can't believe ya'll are questioning my experiences. I'm heart broken again.

[Sarah Beth]

I think its wonderful Jenny that you have someone like him in your life. These things can be fleeting but if he is wanting to introduce you to his friends I take that as a good sign. It's ok to be nervous about it too, when I was dating oh those many years ago I remember how nervous I was as a guy meeting a girl friends family and friends so I think thats pretty natural.

Great good luck to you.

Hugs

[Jenny CD]

Thank you Sarah Beth.

I find it interesting that because I didn't mention all the odd looks at breakfast or dinner... A few snide remarks.... The weird looks we got from Paul's friends the other night.... That this is all fairy tale. Yeah, in a way it is. Because I refuse to focus on the negative unlike some of the ladies here. Just because YOU'VE been dating men for years doesn't mean all of us have. It's all new (tee-effing-hee... giggle-effing-giggle b.).

[jenni_xx]

Jenny

First of all, in any environment such as this, they are just words on a screen. Please do not feel heart broken over anything that anyone writes. Long ago I realised that any compliment received online isn't AS important as any compliment received in in person, and exactly the same can be said of critcism. I also realise that the experience you are relaying to everyone here is one that is totally subjective. So if it is true, is told from a position of someone who is falling in love and thus the romantic, fictional aspect (which does come across to certain members, whether you like it or not), is nevertheless bound to come to the fore.

I will be totally honest with you. I don't believe that what you are writing about is real. But the bottom line is, if it is real, then it really shouldn't matter whether or not I believe you or not. For to you, I'm just words on a screen. Your heart-felt objections and proclamations of feeling heart-broken because of a handful of "doubting posts" run the risk of coming across as someone who "protests too much".

I just simply can not wrap my head around how open Paul is about all of this. In my experience, men who date cd's are not as open, for one very obvious reason (so obvious it doesn't need to be explained here). What I don't understand is that you've been on only a handful of dates with Paul, yet he has introduced you to his business partners so soon into a relationship. How often does it happen that a man will introduce a new girlfriend to such colleagues so early in a relationship, let alone a girlfriend who is transgendered? Yet this is what has supposedly happened with you and Paul. And that you've glossed over this scenario to the extent of not even indicating that it's posed any problem for Paul, makes me doubt your story. The fact that this is all new to you too, and the fact that you are being so open about other aspects of your relationship with Paul makes me wonder why the focus of many of your posts hasn't been along those lines. Instead, you're focusing on elements that a fantasy writer would focus upon. The saying "too good to be true" just can't leave my mind when I read your posts about this.

Maybe I'm being harsh. Maybe I'm being cynical. As an openly gay man, I've had enough experience of life to know that the worries that you've expressed in your posts are not the worries that have ever been at the forefront of my mind whenever I've met someone new. And they were most certainly not the worries that I encountered when I had only just come out of the closet - both as a gay man, and as a cd. But like I say, my doubts are only that - doubts, and as I'm nothing to you on a personal level, there is no reason for you to respond by feeling, in your words, heart-broken. I hope it all is true, because if it is, then that would be wonderful. And if it is true, then I will wish you every happiness and apologise right now for ever doubting you. But just as my doubts shouldn't matter to you (if it is true), then neither should my expression of happiness to you matter. And neither should my apology.

[Jenny CD]

I understand Jenni... See, I never posted that Paul has always been attracted to CD/TS. He told me that from the start. I explained to him that I didn't want to be hidden away and for him to be ashamed of me for who I am. I told him I didn't want a secret relationship. That's why he took me to the play and to the party. He told me he wanted me to trust him. What is so wrong with that? Why should my new life be questioned when all I'm doing is sharing the GOOD parts... Except for Timothy. And yes, the worries I posted about were and are real. I still worry. The other day at breakfast, I knew we were being stared at. People were gawking. But Paul didn't seem to care, and that made me more comfortable.
I mean do I HAVE to write down every time someone laughed at us, pointed at us, or just stared at us? I don't want to focus on that!!! That wasn't or isn't or won't be the point of this thread for me. This is a totally new experience for me and I'm not making excuses for it. See, I've been attracted to men, but never really acted on it. Sort of. But, not like this. I've never been smitten over a man before. It's new to me and maybe I do write heavenly stuff. But, that's the way I feel.
Sorry if I seem defensive... But, it just seems like I'm being attacked by people that I thought were my friends.

[jenni_xx]

Jenny

Paul always being attracted to CD/TS is one thing. That is what he would have told you, and no doubt that him saying that would be the case. But the question is, would he have been as honest about that to his work colleagues? I've not yet met a man who has been open to everyone - both professionally and personally in that regard. Even in the gay community, men, in my experience, are not open (completely) about that. So it's not his attraction to you that is being questioned. It's his openness to everyone else, to the extent that he would introduce you - a transgendered person - to his work colleagues, after less than a handful of dates. Maybe the reason for that - that is, his openness in that regard - is because he's dated numerous CD/TS's in the past so that it's no longer an issue among his work friends. Is that the case?

No, you don't HAVE to write down ANY negativity in regards to your relationship. But to be honest, it would be nice to hear it. For to hear that would serve a much better purpose in regards to the doubts, trepidations that others here might be feeling in respect of them hoping, dreaming, realising, what it is like when they do come out of the closet. Your situation could be used as a catalyst, a confidence boost for such people, and in highlighting the good and the bad, being realistic and "dreamy" at the same time, may well help others come to terms with themselves. Because of what you HAVE chosen to disclose, your experience DOES come across as a fantasy, as an ideal. And that is the danger in posting such posts in a public domain. I say you don't want to focus on that, but do you have any idea how much others would gain from you doing precisely that? After all, the biggest thing that holds so many back is the fear of how other people would react. Yet here you are, going out, dating, living that reality, and yet you have chosen NOT to focus on the realities of living such a life. A harsher person than me would say that that is irresponsible.

You do come across as defensive. Only in light of the handful of posts today that have doubted your story however. Look, the vast majority of people on this forum are NOT friends. We are mere acquaintances who have something in common. But that commonality is diminished the moment we delve deeper into ourselves and realise that the CD community contains individuals who are just as diverse as any other person in society is. I love to play the piano. Yet not all pianists are my friends.

If your story is false (that's IF), then you have done nothing but take people for a ride. A ride on a fantasy that you want to go on. If your story is true, then my (and others) doubts are completely misguided. There is only one person here who knows which scenario is actually the case, and that person is you. No one else, no matter how brutal they may be in their criticism of you, or how complimentary they may be in their support of you. YOU know what the truth is. And thus it is you and only you who has to deal with that. Heart-broken you said earlier. No your not. Not by 4 or 5 "negative" messages in a 140-plus message thread. That just doesn't stack up. I mean, you could have had 4-5 messages that expressed their disgust at you being in a gay relationship (trust me, as a gay man, the percentages of disgust that I've experienced have been far higher than you've experienced here).

And for what it's worth - the "tee-hees" do grate a little. BadTranny did say it best - you are not a teenage girl. You never have been. You do not therefore know AT ALL what a teenage girl feels like. And no does another other CD/TS who has ever frequented this site. We just have a perception of what that would feel like. Nothing more. Your "tee-hees" therefore just come across, to me at least, as a caricature of what we, as MEN (which we are, or have been), imagine it to be.

[Jenny CD]

I getcha... And yes, most of Paul's friends know he's gay. But, they did not know that he was attracted to CD/TG. Now they do. And it doesn't seem like a big deal to them or him. To me, yes. Very big deal. Every time we go out it's a BIG DEAL. I'm frightened, scared, nervous, everything a young person would go through on their first dates. Yeah, I'm a man... but a teenager when it comes to dating as a girl. That's the best way to explain it, and you did it for me. Every time we go somewhere, I'm terrified. Not for me, for him. I don't want him to be embarrassed. I'm so afraid that he is going to be ashamed of me because frankly I'm a guy in a dress. Do you really know how scary it is to walk into Denny's wearing short white shorts, a pink top and flip-flops? While holding the hand of man that you are attracted to and scared of at the same time? It's terrifying and exhilarating. To be honest, I'm scared... I really am. I don't know what to think. I'm so confused. Am I gay? Am I a girl? Am I bi? Am I a wondering straight guy? Experimenting? I'm growing boobs, but do I really want them? Yeah, I do... eventually. I think I'm enjoying the confusion too much. Does any of this make sense to anyone?

[jenni_xx]

Jenny

Sexuality is very complex. Labels are put on all of us.

You have just labelled Paul as "gay". Meaning that Paul, a man, is attracted to... Men.

You, and anyone else reading this, will have to educate me. What is the label that we ascribe to men who find CD/TG's, in Jenny's own words, "attractive"?

A straight man finds women attractive. A CD who presents as female, and actually PASSES as female, will "fool" any straight man, and straight men will find such CD/TG's "attractive".

A gay man will not, because such CD/TG's do NOT look like men.

[Jenny CD]

Can't answer that. Loaded question. Why are you attracted to men? Why was your mother attracted to your father? Why are men attracted to bathing suit models? Why are women attracted to lead guitarists? Because they just are. Not difficult to understand.

[jenni_xx]

Ok, I'm going to leave it now, because I sense that you are getting annoyed and as a result looking for confrontation. I will simply say, it matters not a jot to you what I say, whether I believe you or not. Just be happy, and I genuinely do wish you all the best for the future.

[Jenny CD]

Don't wanna be mean, Jenni... but, that isn't your name. You don't even post a pic of yourself. Your avatar is obviously not you, and you have the nerve to question me? As for me... Jenny is my name on my ID. The picture is of Jenny. I walk as Jenny all day until I have to go to work (which I've explained in another thread). And some of you have the nerve?

Sorry, I am upset at the turn of events in this thread. I just don't think it's fair. All I wanted to do was share a life experience with some of ya'll and I get crap. Lesson learned.

[Zylia]

Good guys like Paul are very rare. Bogus stories on the internet however are not rare, so please excuse us for being a bit skeptical. I can't agree more with jenni_xx's posts.

Paul being gay and into CD/TG's seems atypical to me, but I have to admit that I don't know quite enough about that at all. I always assumed it was more of a straight thing, just like CD'ing itself.

[Jenny CD]

Bogus stories?!?! Forgive me for wanting to share life experiences with ya'll. Dang, won't happen again. Didn't know that sharing life stories was against the rules. Got it. Ass holes. Guess I won't be back. Some of you think you are high and mighty with your covergirl BS. But you're not. Most of you are scared little girls sitting in a closet hiding away from the world. Then, you criticize me? I'm out there everyday. Not hiding in my bedroom or from a spouse. I'm in Walmart or Target shopping or where ever else. Believe it or not, I don't care... I'm going out on dates with a handsome gentleman and loving every minute of it. Some of you are giving me grief over it, but I don't give a dam... Okay? So, before you folks question me or criticize me... look in the mirror.

Done with this thread.

[Marleena]

Well I found the thread cute and I stand by it. Maybe I'm just a romantic at heart IDK. I think all of us should have known that Jenny has never been with a guy before and he is a CD admirer. If I decided to have a relationship with a guy I would be a nervous wreck and not know how to handle it either. Of course she got read and all that but why state the obvious?

Yeah it read like a teenage girl's diary but I see no harm in it. I just don't see it a big deal.

Yes, I also understand people questioning her too.

[Kelly Smith]

"Originally Posted by kathtx
But hey, I'm around here enough to expect any reply from badtranny to contain at least 30% snark by volume, so I'm cool."

At least 30%. It can get much higher.

[jenni_xx]

Don't wanna be mean, Jenni... but, that isn't your name. You don't even post a pic of yourself. Your avatar is obviously not you, and you have the nerve to question me? As for me... Jenny is my name on my ID. The picture is of Jenny. I walk as Jenny all day until I have to go to work (which I've explained in another thread). And some of you have the nerve?

Sorry, I am upset at the turn of events in this thread. I just don't think it's fair. All I wanted to do was share a life experience with some of ya'll and I get crap. Lesson learned.

You are right. Jenni isn't my real name. Just as I would presume that the vast majority of names that we all identify ourselves here by are not our actual names. I disclosed my real name to you in PM. And now, on a public message board, you are using that against me.

And you are also right - the avatar is obviously not me. It is a cartoon. An avatar that is one amongst many that this very site offers to us.

And you think it is pertinent to say that because I use a female name (as the majority do), and because I use an avatar that this very site provides, that I have no "right" to question you. I applaud you for having your own picture as your avatar. I mean that genuinely. But that you do doesn't give you the right to dismiss the posts of people who do not have a picture of themselves in an avatar. You are out of order for even insinuating such a thing.

I'm in no doubt that you are upset at the turn of events in this thread. I know I would be. But I am also mature enough to realise that, in an enviornment such as this, we leave ourselves exposed to positive and negative comments. It is up to ourselves to decide which comments we want to focus upon, which comments we want to find value in. This thread is now almost 150 posts in length, and the negative comments amount to a mere handful. If those negative comments are way off the mark, if those negative comments do not reflect what is actually happening to you, then you should simply dismiss them. But you have chosen, by your own accord, not to dismiss them. On the contrary, you have chosen to respond to such comments, and respond in such a way as to get personal to those who merely express doubt in what you say. You have chosen to attempt to belittle me, based on "Jenni" not being my real name (in which case, you are making a statement about the vast majority of people here), and have also chosen to belittle my opinion because I haven't posted a picture of myself in my avatar.

You are right - there is a lesson to be learned here. That is, do not ever have the "audacity" to merely question, or merely doubt, anything that another poster has to say. Well I'm sorry, but that kind of environment will only lead to a saturated environment which will result in this place becoming superficial, and as a result, disingenuous.

All I have ever done is express my doubt that your story is real. I've said, both here publicly, and in private to you in PM's, that it is only a doubt. I've never once catagorically stated that you are not telling the truth. Because I simply do not know whether you are or not. In return, you have chosen to get personal, and to belittle me. Forgive me, but I feel that that is unreasonable of you.

So you are (again) right. A lesson has indeed been learned.

[Janet77]

True or not, I did enjoy reading this thread. I think a lot of us hope/wish it were true. A man like Paul who is comfortable with who he is and who you are surely wouldn't mind you posting pics of the two of you on one of your dates in here, if you want to embarrass the doubters....Anyway, why get upset about what other people post about your story? If it is true, who cares what they think? And if it isn't true, who cares? Still a good read!:D

[whowhatwhen]

Like I said in my post, unless I see proof otherwise I will assume people are telling the truth.

Badtranny was right in another way though, lots of us haven't dated a man and don't know what it's like.
Maybe some of our members more experienced in that area can write a guide or informative post of sorts?

Lets face it, someone who is just starting to explore their attraction to men is probably way more likely to be taken advantage of due to their inexperience.
It's certainly something I worry about, this is an area where the more experienced members can guide people just starting with relationships, or hell, even just hookups with men.

[Barbara Dugan]

Lets face it, someone who is just starting to explore their attraction to men is probably way more likely to be taken advantage of due to their inexperience.
It's certainly something I worry about, this is an area where the more experienced members can guide people just starting with relationships, or hell, even just hookups with men.

This is a very good point, I am seeing that the younger generation of crossdressers are more openly dating guys, but I am not sure if this site is the correct venue for that sort of advice

[Ediosa]

Jenny,

I liked the story....just a little word of advice. If it's true, the only way to shut the naysayers up is to show proof. Pictures says a million world and in this case pictures shut naysayers up. Take pictures, take lots of them. If your afraid to show his face....blurr it out.

My advice.

Elizabeth

[Deedee Skyblue]

Oh my... I hadn't read this thread before, but something Tara said in another thread led me here. I can't believe some of the comments. If you don't believe Jenny's story, than go read something else. There is no reason to be rude and no reason to call her a liar - just go read something else. The nice thing about the Internet is you can find places where people agree with you - so why do so many people instead look for people they don't agree with and start arguments? Are people really that uncivilized?

To those folks who called Jenny a liar - did her story hurt you? You wasted a lot of time reading it and then even more making rude demeaning comments. Why did you feel you had to waste your time? How many threads are there in this forum? Surely you can find threads where you would prefer to spend your time. Or do you prefer being rude?

Regarding the jackass that hit on her at the play - in college, one of my friends asked my girlfriend for sex once, when I was nearby. Not much of a friend. One of my high school coaches hit on my girlfriend - he knew she was my girlfriend, she was 19 years younger than him, and he and I were such good friends that she didn't tell me about it for years later. It happens, not just in the movies.

Deedee

[rita63]

There is no doubt to someone like myself who is just coming out in their mid 60s this reads like a fantasy many of us would like to have. If not for the young people in my support group who have similar experiences I would laugh at it out loud. But being trans and out is a real part of life now. My group includes teens who are completing high school as the gender of their conscience. The reality of todays young trans person is like that of a cis gendered person with all the human angst and insecurity we all experience as it is expressed in Jenny's story.

hugs rita

[whowhatwhen]

This is a very good point, I am seeing that the younger generation of crossdressers are more openly dating guys, but I am not sure if this site is the correct venue for that sort of advice

It doesn't have to be graphically sexual but honestly we're all adults here, 18 and over and IMO safety is important.
I know there is an air of asexuality here but people not interested in the man dating thread don't have to read it.

Something like positions or whatever isn't necessary but I don't see the harm in emphasising the importance of protection and lubrication for instance.
But we're getting a bit OT here.

[Jenny CD]

Why does everybody keep saying "if it's true"? Gawd, how insulting can some of you be? I've been as honest as I can... and still. Makes me want to be a lurker again.

[whowhatwhen]

Just keep posting anyway, no one here is going to get along 100% and we've all argued with each other at one point or another.
In the end we're just people talking, we occasionally disagree but mostly move on.

Can you imagine how empty this forum would be if everyone lurked whenever they had a tiff with another member?
:)

[Jenny CD]

Too true Corinne. I guess I'm just disappointed in the recent reactions. And hurt as well. I'm human, I hurt, I cry, I laugh, I question, everything...But, I didn't think I would get slammed here for sharing. To be called names, for people to question, i don't get it. And it's very upsetting. I'm about to go into work wearing my bra because my boobs ache... do I need to take pictures of that? People have to PROVE to others, strangers? That's BS.

[Badtranny]

To those folks who called Jenny a liar - did her story hurt you?

Heaven's no. There's no way a story like that could hurt me because I live a real life and have been out as gay then as openly trans for a few years now. Her story wouldn't last an hour over in the TS section because we know poo when we see it.

However, her story could indeed hurt someone who has been closeted and maybe isn't all that passable (passability takes a lot of work and time) and really wants to live out her fantasy of meeting one of those guys she's been chatting with online. Jenny's story makes meeting someone seem so wonderful and gratifying that it would give someone who really doesn't know any better a false sense of security about what's going to happen. I was a closet case for many years so I know all about being naive and clueless. During the year that I discovered cross-dressing I met several guys from online and even though I was experienced with men, I was still surprised by some of them. Men who are closeted and want to meet CD's are not looking for friends or cuddle buddies. They're looking for sex front and center. They also tend to be quite abrupt about it.

I had my first homo experience at 19, so let's just say I've seen a cockatoo and I can tell you with certainty that CD admirers are a totally different breed than your standard gay or bi dude. Not necessarily bad, but definitely different. I have met a couple of sweethearts but most of them were looking for some action and then looking for the door. NONE of them were interested in being seen in public with me.

Is Jenny's story possible? I suppose anything is possible but it doesn't seem very likely to me or any of the other girls who have had lots of real world experience with men. If one of the girls I respect who is known to have experience in these matters disagrees with me, such as Ms Melendez, and she has a cogent argument, then I will reconsider. Until then, I think it's important to let people know what it's really like out there and the chances of meeting Mr Wonderful for a part-timer are slim indeed. Even slimmer if Jenny actually found one.

[gen8890]

Hi Jenny,

Thanks for answering my question about heights, I think you hit the nail on the head.

Let us know, from time to time, how things go with Paul.

[Barbara Dugan]

Please Jenny don't think this personal ...I really do hate to agree with Ms Hobbs on this one but if there is someone that is for real here is she, and the reasons to doubt your experience are very valid
I love guys and I've kissed a lot frogs on the pursuit of finding my prince charming...I've been approached by a lot of truly TS admirers, if you show Badtranny or me a picture of Paul chances are we have seen him before.
You are right you don't have to prove anything to anybody but you got to accept that people still can doubt what we said on a public forum and honestly I want your experience to be true

[MissTee]

I've enjoyed reading this thread. Subject matter contained herein is not my thing, but it was a happy thread. I enjoy happy threads. Little matter if I believe it or not. It made me smile. Thank you for giving me something to smile about, Jenny.

[Nicole Erin]

Jenny, on this forum people are often trying to discredit others. "You are not a real TS if..." seems to be the most common theme in the TG world. Not often does dating come up.
Not just us TG but GG women often have problems with men who just want to bump uglies and be done.
You would not be the first TG around here who has had an actual relationship with a man so it does happen.

As far as being believable - your story is more feasible than if someone came in claiming to be dating some 21 year old hot chick who loves TG. THAT would raise skepticism.

[Jenny CD]

I don't know why I thought it might be nice to share my experiences with ya'll. I'm blown away at the negativity.... tried to explain but still get shit. Done with this and now I know not to share anymore. I'll just become a cynical old hag like some of you. Too much.... Jeez.

[AmyGaleRT]

Jenny, I'm so sorry people seem to be treating you so harshly! I don't think you're making any of it up, and if you're glossing over the little details of people reading you, well, that's probably just 'cause you'd rather not dwell on them. I would've elided such details myself, unless they were important to the story.

I think it's only natural that you should sound a little like a teenage girl...you missed out on the experience of being a teenage girl the first time around, so you're making up for lost time! (Sometimes I-as-Amy have much the same feelings!)

You can still PM me about your experiences...I'll never get the opportunity to experience what you're experiencing (Sabrina would not approve! :O ), so at least I can live vicariously through you! :)

- Amy

[Shelly Preston]

Thread closed

I dont really worry about the story being true or not.

I can understand why sometimes people may not believe what is written. You can say you dont believe it without being so harsh.

I think enough has already been said in this thread.