Quick Question/Query/Discussion

[Celialeblanche]

Im new here, as of yesterday; and I just really want to know, without prying too much, why you personally Cross Dress? See I got this question bombarded by my mam, and I really, I'm just unsure. I'm a Gay Man & I've just always wanted a good old frock and to be fabulous, my dad doesn't accept/like it, but he accepts my sexuality which is a plus point I suppose, but anyway, my mother phrased it as somewhat, 'you're gay, and what's this extra bit?' baring in mind my mother is my biggest fan, I think it's the desire to be different? To be the real me no matter what form, it's not that I want to be a woman, I just want the freedom to chose how I look and how I dress, Celia came about whilst dressing up for my sisters party, something she threw in the 'hat' and me just willing to go ahead with it, more willing than I let on, it was a dream come true to be finally able to be me, Shaun/Celia.

I know it's a god awful mouthful ^ anybody relate/ want to share?

[xd-tigger]

I dress because I think woman's clothes more comfortable, lighter and feel better than mens. Plus you have a lot more choice :)

[dominique]

For me it was a realisation that I loved looking at women, then I had the chance to dress as one was for me the big plus in all this. Also the freedom it brings with wearing such wonderful clothes and going out and being treated as a woman which for me is the ultimate satisfaction in it all.

[Candice Mae]

I'm TG, been considering transitioning for a while now. But, at my age I'm not ready to turn my life upside down as things are going pretty good otherwise. I know that results are better when you transition at a younger age, but I'm still trying to figure out who exactly "Candice" is. So dressing allows me to be who I feel I am on the inside.

[Celialeblanche]

It's interesting to hear other peoples perspectives on the subject, whether a CD, TG Etc. it's a very strong experience, somewhat a roller coaster ride.

[Zylia]

It has been said a few times in other threads and I think it's worth repeating: your sexual orientation has nothing to do with with your gender identity. Your sexual orientation is (very bluntly) gay and based on what you've told us you may have 'transgendered' gender identity, which is an umbrella term for a whole range of identities, ranging from someone who's gender assigned at birth does not match its own identification, to someone who does not conform unambiguously to one gender (all the time). An assumption can be made that being transgender isn't necessary for enjoying cross-dressing, but that's beside the point here. I don't think that gays are more 'susceptible' of being cross-dressers, as the matter of fact, I don't think I go out on a limb when I say that a large majority of (non-transitioning) cross-dressers are heterosexual.

In the grand scheme of things, your sexual preference may be related to your gender identity, but that remains unproven. Bottom line is that being a cross-dresser and being gay is actually not all that common as many 'muggles' think. It's not an 'extra thing' directly linked your sexual preference, it's a whole new thing.

As for why I cross-dress myself, because I had the urge and found out that I really enjoyed doing it.

[Jana]

I dress because I think woman's clothes more comfortable, lighter and feel better than mens. Plus you have a lot more choice :)

I wish it were that simple for me. I'm TG, have considered transitioning, but decided against it for several reasons, at least for the time being. So, I dress to appease the woman within, whenever the urge appears.

[Rhonda Darling]

Celia:

First of all, welcome to a great little corner of the Internet. As you may already know, this is a great place for information, guidance, OPINIONS, friendships, and more.

I'm sure that by days end, you'll have many replies to sort through. It would be helpful if you could tell us a little about your background - age, when you realized you were gay, when you first had a desire to try on women's clothes (and to what extent you've done so), what part of the world you live in, etc. we are, after all, complicated beings and we can best help you if we know a little bit more about you.

I crossdress for a number of "reasons", the main one is because it is a part of me to do so. I'm 62 and have had the desire to wear women's clothes and act the role of a woman since I was about 4 or 5. I'm hetero, as it seems a majority of us are, but hat is entirely separate from my desire to portray as Rhonda.

Again, welcome. Best regards,
Rhonda

[deebra]

It makes you feel pretty, sexy, feminine and it's a rel turn-on.

[Celialeblanche]

Celia:

First of all, welcome to a great little corner of the Internet. As you may already know, this is a great place for information, guidance, OPINIONS, friendships, and more.

Thank you so much for a warm welcome!! :D

I'm 18 years old, and I suppose deep down I've always known I was Gay, the 'genes' fit and I wore them, as there are many Gay family members, but moving on from that, I'm from County Durham in the Northeast of England :) growing up I always knew, I used to prayer, oh this is where it gets alitalia strange, I used to pray to be straight, be normal and to fit in, I used to sleep at night hating who I was and what I was becoming, to fit in, I got girl friends and that's literally the extent of that, they were just girls and friends, cause its cool to be straight etc... But deep down my sexuality was still hidden, until I was secure in myself, at the age of 15 I finally reached out to a couple of my close friends. (who happened to be girls) I finally began to feel comfortable in my own skin, I could be me for ONCE!! Sure name calling came alongside that from others but that's a whole different novel, it wasn't till this year a couple of months ago that I actually made the leap to dress up if you wish. My mam and sister have always been supportive about anything, so for a party I unveiled Celia Le Blanche, it's really not that I want to be a woman, Because I don't, I think it's a means of escape from reality. A small sense of fantasy within This harsh world, I use it as a facade, the wigs, the makeup and the frocks

[Emi]

I don't really know "why", thats the trouble. Thats why I am here. Welcome to the community.

[Tina B.]

Well if we just have to dig deep, and Analyzes the why of it. We all have a little different take as to why we do it, I've dressed every chance I got every since I was 6 years old. I'm an old codger now and dress more that ever, now the why. If I stop dressing for very long, I start to get depressed, very depressed, that leads to suppressed anger, and I become a very mean person, that I don't like and I don't see why anyone else would either. I figured years ago, I had two choices in my life, I could spend thousands of dollars on therapy, that might or might not do any good, (Turns out no one in the medical field has ever claimed to find a cure) Or I could spend thousands of dollars over the course of a life time for a cure guaranteed to sooth those inter demons, I've been shopping for Therapy every since, and have build too nice of a collection of clothes leave them in the closet.
If it weren't a compulsion I would have stopped back when I lost my first wife because of it, but it is, so I don't fight it, I enjoy it! When life gives you lemons, make lemonade, When life makes you a crossdresser, go shopping!

[Princess Grandpa]

This was my first question once I came to accept this. It's probably what caused me to find this site. I read on one of the threads something to the affect of "it is what it is. You can spend your life worrying over the whys or you can enjoy who you are. This really really made sense to me. It is exactly what we are doing now. Occasionally I stop and wonder about the whys and what ifs. Mostly I'm just having fun discovering myself.

Hug
Rita

[Dianne S]

At a superficial level, the reason is that it feels good and is fun. I like the feeling of wearing women's clothes and (trying to) look female.

At a deeper level, I don't really know why dressing up as a woman elicits those feelings in me. I used to wonder about it, but now I've given up wondering and just accept it as a fact of life.

[Jenny CD]

When life gives you lemons, make lemonade, When life makes you a crossdresser, go shopping!

Love that quote! Very creative and true!!!

Another note... I don't believe there is a "cure" per se. Just like being gay, I believe we're born this way. I think about dressing all the time and that's enjoyable to me, too. Some might think I'm gay because when I'm dressed I definitely notice handsome men. In drab, I notice pretty women. I consider myself bi. But, I started HRT a few weeks ago and too be completely honest don't know if I'll go all the way (although my therapist has given me support).
You have made the right step by joining this group of ladies... 99% are full of knowledge and can help you with questions that you might have. They've helped me more than they know and for that I'm extremely appreciative of all of them.

[Ericaxd]

I believe Jenny is absolutely right. It's not a choice any more than being born male or female is a choice. I dress as a woman because if I didn't I would not be whole. I have tried, and sometimes can go a few months without dressing (or visiting this forum) but I always, always come back. And it feels good.

[Cheryl T]

I dress because I need to express the feminine part of me that I can't express any other way.

[Jackie7]

I love how I look in girl clothes, I take lots of pix, I love to see my girl self in mirrors. Yes I also like to express my femme side and I like the choices in fit and fabric.

[josrphine]

First most of us like our fem side. I don't want to have SRS. I do like dressing as a women, I am now 72 but look very good for my age make up dose wonders. My girl friend wants me to be a women " Dressed " We go out together as sisters and she love's it. As for gay part that is also you. I go both ways an just like going with a women I like good looking clean men.. Have fun

[Allison Quinn]

I wish it were that simple for me. I'm TG, have considered transitioning, but decided against it for several reasons, at least for the time being. So, I dress to appease the woman within, whenever the urge appears.

^ this would be me as well :P
I am just trying to match the inside with the outside as best as I can :)

[CynthiaD]

I dress like a woman because male clothing feels "wrong." The longer I wear male clothing the more wrong and uncomfortable it feels. I look in the mirror and I wonder who that is looking back at me. I don't actually get a thrill from wearing female clothing. I just feel that it's "right." I look in the mirror and see me, not some stranger looking at me.

As to why this is true, I have no idea.

[andrea lace]

I like you are from the UK down south. I am a middle aged guy who likes to CD. I told my wife of 17 years of this and her first reaction was to think that I was gay.
We have done alot of soul searching together and I have decided that I am bi.
I have never been attracted to guys always women but at times I fantasise about being the woman in a sexual encounter. I won't cheat on my wife and love her with all my heart but having these fantasies makes me bi sexual or so I believe. There is a huge spectrum of people on this forum; gay, bi, straight and I think that if you take a ruler 1 being straight and 30 being gay I fall somewhere in the middle. What I am trying to say gender and sexuality are different but both can be complex and confusing. I am middle aged and only just getting to the bottom of Andrea!

[Gretchen_To_Be]

The image of a woman's legs in sheer hose and high heels is devastatingly erotic for me, and gives me a strong sense of envy because I want my legs to look like that.

[Sabrina133]

Hi Celia, welcome to a really fabulous place. I dress because i love the way i look when dressed. Am also somewhat effeminate and dressing that way more closely matches my inner self.

[Beth Wilde]

I'm also a gay man and a T-Girl, I've never really felt these things were related to each other. I really enjoy wearing the lovely clothes and just being different sometimes! There are probably thousands of reasons that people dress up, if you enjoy it then keep doing it! We only have one life, enjoy it!! :hugs:

[NathalieX66]

You can ask me the question as to why I prefer Coca Cola over Pepsi. Answer: I just do. I don't know why, I just do.

[flatlander_48]

I came out to myself as a bisexual about 25 years ago and as a crossdresser about 10 years ago. Sometimes it feels that there is a relationship between the 2 and sometimes not. In other words when dressed sometimes there is an inward focus that relates to purely how it makes me feel. Other times there is an outward focus which, given appropriate circumstances, could lead to fireworks. I've never bothered to try to figure it out. I take sort of a mystical approach and say that at the proper time, all will be known. Until that happens, I don't worry about it.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Blanch, Welcome to our forum when you are here you are home.

Crosdressing, It's just who I an and it's what I do.

[Requal Jo]

Welcome. I to am new to the group and have found the Girls fantastic as they share their personal experiences and confident replies to all questions. They have greatly assisted my confidence and I no longer feel lonely. Why do I dress? It relaxes me from stressful days, I enjoy the feel of the clothing and I can be someone else. I look forward to the day I first go out.

[Beverley Sims]

It is interesting and does play with your mind that your parents accept your gay status but not your CD'ing.
That seems normal, CD'ing sems to be a hurdle for most people, but being gay seems normal. ?????