Labels

[Danitgirl1]

Hi All
Is it just me or do a few of us seem obsessed with labels?
Crossdresser, trans, tranny, tgirl, bi, straight, gay and so many others.
It is strange given that we seem to revel in exploding society's labels (male/female) yet we then seek to label ourselves in order to better (?) define who we are.
Perhaps we should just be more accepting of who we are and not worry so much about calling it something.
Although I do see the need to name something to understand it, perhaps in some cases this confuses rather than clarifies?
Tricky, please don't take this the wrong way, it is meant in the spirit of inquiry.
Hugs
Dani

[Beverley Sims]

This question is asked in different ways almost daily.
I say forget labels and Just use your chosen name.
Choose something sensible and not too flowery or outlandish.
You may have to learn to live with it.

[SophieKitty]

For me it's important for three reasons, one I'm starting out and I personally just need a label right now. Hopefully one day I can just reply to someone who asks what i am by saying "a human being, you?" but right now I feel I need one myself. Another reason so it makes it easier to explain to family and friends when I eventually walk down the stairs from my bedroom after calling a family meeting and shout surprise dressed in a wig, corset, skirt, knee high socks, skirt and full make-up! Another is similar, but if I'm chatting up another girl they will probably need a label and explanations into who I am, or if I'm on a dating website. But I agree in principle no-one should have a label as everyone should feel unique.

[I Am Paula]

It's human nature to pigeon hole/categorize everything. Labels make people comfortable, they know if they fit inside the box, or outside the box. Some people WANT to know what is in the next box, and some are fearful of it.
I don't think we have to label ourselves, but sometimes it just makes it easier to describe ourselves/others.

[Kate Simmons]

Some need labels to survive and navigate I guess but I know who I am and that is all that counts. If someone sees the need to "label" me, they'd better have all of the correct nutritional information and/or drug facts on it. :)

[devida]

Hello Dani:
I completely agree. I don't think that any of the positive labels like mtf, trans*,gay, straight, bi, male, female actually refer to what I'm doing or who I am. The negative labels, which attempt to define by stating what you're not, e.g. non-binary, non-gendered, aren't much use either. I like the word androgynous, probably because it's both widely used and fairly nondescript. My problem is that all these words are for people like me limiting and kind of depressing. If they fit you that's wonderful. If they don't it's just the same old problem, isn't it? Love, devida

[Tina B.]

Labels help us identify things, They are important! When talking to someone, with out labels it's hard to know if you are talking about the same thing. There is a big difference between the mind set of a TS person, and a Transgendered Person, and one that claims not to be Transgendered, "just likes to dress for the fashion", and let's not forget the fetish dresser, we are all different, and with out labels, how do we know who we are.
The differences are important, especially for the newbies, that are just starting to try to figure this all out.
Stop labeling things, tell that to a map maker, with out labels it would be hard to get anywhere. I think it's the same in side you head, with out the labels, how do you move yourself forward, first you have to know where you are.

[devida]

Hello Celeste: I also agree that labels are sometimes a kindness that we can offer others. It seems clear to me that people on this forum are generally different from the majority population because they are willing and interested in questioning cultural gender norms and are happy to examine and experiment with the way in which their identity is influenced by what they wear, how they act and how they define themselves. The ability to do this is an enormous source of strength and energy and I think can result in a huge reduction in anxiety. Trying to conform to the ever shifting norms of what other people think your gender should be and how it should act is very difficult and a gigantic chore, though must people just soldier on in grim determination. I would like to ease that burden for them if I can a little bit. If this means smiling and nodding if they want to think of me as male, gay, queer, a crossdresser, transgender or just plain strange, that's fine. It was far too hard for me to be normal. I do feel for them. Love, devida.

[NicoleScott]

I use labels all the time. Labels are just words with definitions, and are needed to communicate. The people who are obsessed with labels are the one that say they hate them, then go on and use labels in their argument (like "don't label me, I'm just a human"). Like the guy who no longer works for McDonald's, because he insisted on calling one of their popular items "two all beef patties special sauce lettuce cheese pickles onions on a sesame seed bun". He hated labels but acquired a new one, "unemployed". haha

[Dawn cd]

It was easier when you could tear the labels off. Printed labels are impossible to hide.

[Joanne f]

Hello Danitgirl1,
how are you, I understand what you are saying but in reality everything needs some sort of label so that you know what you are dealing with , you cannot say that we do not need labels then go and call this site Cross dressers .com as straight away that is labelling those who use it plus you have to identify the different stages that people are on here otherwise you would not know whether you are communicating with a CD,TG,TS ,MtF, FtM or GG but I agree in that it would be nice if once you get out of the forums we were just called and treated as normal People.

[I Am Paula]

Devida- The problem with labels, is that like technical jargon, or pop culture, not everyone gleens the same meaning from them. If I describe myself as trans-woman, or even transsexual, any one within the trans community knows exactly what I am, but those looking in still might imagine anything from weekend drag queen to post-op.
A single set of labels still isn't apropos for all.

[Lynn Marie]

SOS We talk about transgender issues here. How the heck do you do that without some form of identifying labels?

[Danitgirl1]

Sure, we need words to talk about things, but I suppose my question relates to the fact that labeling tends to 'fix' things. ie make them permanent, when it seems so many of us are so much more fluid. Works in progress so to speak, but yes I get it.