I am getting **** for my long girly nails

[BlairP]

Hi peeps...I recently decided to grow my nails out for the first time in my life. They are quite long...about 1/4" past my fingertips and shape squarish and with a clear pink tint polish. I just totally love the way they look and evrything I touch all day long makes me feel erotic and girly. They are so sexy to me and I dont want to cut them. But they get longer every day and I know I have to trim or file them at some point.

I work at a retail store and I am starting to get funny looks and comments by customers and coworkers. My god they are just nails but people have such strong opinions about them. Sometimes I feel self conscious but mostly I dont give a shit any more. I love my girly nails very much and they help me to e press my fem self all day long in a really real and up front way. I keep then very clean and polish them twice a week.

Do any of you have any thoughts or experience with this? How long is too long in guy mode? (Its a bad indoor picture...they are actually very white...I dont like yellow nails...the tips are ao white it looks like i have a french manicure (if only)

[bridget thronton]

If you like your nails long - ignore the comments, they will stop when they no longer get a reaction from you

[SophieKitty]

You should totally go in in girl mode and say "I thought I'd match the rest of my body to my nails" xD

[brandi.tgurl]

haha Sophie!
if you like them (the nails), and they (the nails, again) make you feel good, who cares what others have to say? i mean, unless it is actually causing a distraction or situation where work is not, or can not be done - or be done safely, and properly, they are your nails, and no one can tell you, or expect you to wear them a specific way. i personally think they look amazing! (and they look all natural, too. congrats). i love what you did with the tint. i also grow my nails out on a regular basis (anywhere from 1/8" to 1/4"). however, i don't color them, except with clear coat - sometimes. and, i also groom my eyebrows. i've never had anyone comment on my nails - and comments about my eyebrows have never been negative, and i work in an industry that is much more gruff than retail. i am actually surprised that you are getting that response in a retail field. you could always give into the pressure, but, it really comes down to having less drama from them (coworkers and customers), or is it worth putting up with it to feel good and have pride in how you look? but, i think they look great, and would expect, if you keep it up, the heckling should go away.

[Lynn Marie]

You stated that you work at a retail store. Therefore you are representing the owner of the store while you are there. In order to stay employed your appearance must conform to the owners image of an ideal employee. The store pays you, they have every right to expect you to represent them well. Anything you do that causes your appearance to appear out of the ordinary will be noticed by the store and will jeopardize your future employment. They own you during business hours.

[SophieKitty]

Unfortunately Lynn Marie is right. You'll have to trim if your boss says so :( but your nails aren't freakishly long. Maybe say you've joined a religion that forbids cutting of hair or nails. They can't fire you on religious grounds!

[Rogina B]

Nails are a funny thing in that they are like an eye magnet. I am only a boy while doing dirty work. I am constantly laying out work for my crew to be doing and often illustrating it with a piece of soapstone on the steel plate.I notice that eyes seem to follow my fingers because my long nails aren't what one expects on the waterfront..lol and I knew that I had cleaned off my latest "bubble gum" colored polish "more or less" before heading across the street to the boat..I think being able to grow them out makes me happy in that it is an indication of health..I hope!

[Rhonda Darling]

I, too, love to let my nails grow longer than is generally acceptable for 'MEN' to have. My GF gets on me when mine start to be longer than hers. I sometimes use clear polish during the day for work, but usually chicken out on that and just go bare. I do use an emery board to round them off a bit, so they don't catch and break. [First time I went in for a manicure (in drab mode), the girl thought I wanted them trimmed down to the nub. Fortunately I caught her in time and told her I just wanted them shaped and left long. Got the quizzical look from her, w/o the realization of why I might want long nails (this was one dumb young chick). She just did it and chatted away with her co-workers in Vietnamese.]

Rhonda

[deebra]

Is growing your nails long any different than growing a beard or mustach, having one or two earings, several rings on your fingers. Girls do it (not the mustach /beard), is it discriminating if you have to cut them. Equal rights for both sexes?????? Does management have the right to stop you from wearing panties, how about a bra and panties where some might notice the strap under your shirt. Lynn Marie's thread has a lot of truth but where does the emplyer/employee's rights start and stop?

[noeleena]

Hi,

As a girl or boy mode, ? .

My self i did for a time though as you all know im a builder so would break them so i keep them short, did do nail pol not any more ,if it lasted more than an hour was good,

Mind you it makes little difference now wether i have them long or not .

...noeleena..

[Rhonda Darling]

Hi,

Mind you it makes little difference now wether i have them long or not .

...noeleena..

Noeleena: Are you saying there are no longer any moments when you look at your hands and have that deep seated desire to have your nails long and glamorous? For me, the more I mess up my hands (working on boat engine, cleaning things, yard work, etc.), the more that I want my nails long, painted, and out of harms way. Oh, the duality of it all. Arghhhhhhhhh!

Best,
Rhonda

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Blair, Sometimes I let my nails grow and my wife lets me know when they are getting too long.
Some times I will get positive comments from a cashier when making change
and when I was in the hospital the IV nurse said that she wished her nails would look as good as mine.

[Beverley Sims]

Blair when you are in a public place every one notices your grooming.

[Nikki A.]

Mine are a bit long too and I'm in sales. When I really let them grow I've noticed that women notice them more than men or at least are more likely to comment.

[SophieKitty]

Personally i bite my nails, plus i prefer just to use stick on ones while in girl mode, just because i can easily switch from boy to girl no problem, no sacrifice either way. I guess if i start dressing as Sophie more then i may want a more permanent solution :)

[Susanna66]

I have nails about the same length as you. My mother has always been jealous of us kids as she can not grow her nails very long and we all have great looking longer nails.

I agree with Bridget. Ignore the comments and they will stop.

My nails normally have a light coat of pink. The only comments I get are from the girls who say they like them.

[CD_blue]

Agreed with above posters... If boss tells you to cut your nails your going to have to if you want to keep your job. If he doesn't well then everyone else can go to hell :)

[Debra Russell]

Lucky you - you have beautiful nails - keep them they belong to you.........................Debra

[DebbieL]

You stated that you work at a retail store. Therefore you are representing the owner of the store while you are there. In order to stay employed your appearance must conform to the owners image of an ideal employee.

The question is what KIND of retail store. If her nails are that noticed, is it because she works in a store that sells auto parts? If she were selling women's clothing, then the longer nails would be an POSITIVE and the comments about the nails would be compliments.


The store pays you, they have every right to expect you to represent them well. Anything you do that causes your appearance to appear out of the ordinary will be noticed by the store and will jeopardize your future employment. They own you during business hours.

This may depend on the state in which you live. If there are safety issues, such as needing short fingernails because you are handling tools or equipment that could do damage if you had longer nails, that would be a legitimate reason to say cut them. In ERA states, an employer is not allowed to have one "code" for men and another for women. If the female employees are required to keep their nails short, then Blair would need to cut hers. If the other women have longer nails, then attempting to enforce gender conformity would be a violation of that state's equal rights amendment.

Note, there have been some legal cases where this has had interesting consequences. For example, Hooters was not allowed to discriminate against male applicants, but could require that they wear the same uniform as all the other waitresses.

In non-ERA states, where discrimination on the base of gender is allowed, Blair might be required to trim her nails.

Keep in mind that many chains and franchises do business in multiple states, and have policies that define dress codes and prohibit discrimination even in non-ERA states.

On the other hand, customers and co-workers also have the right to freedom of speech. So long as they do not make threats, or engage in sexual harassment, they are allowed to make comments, positive or negative, about the nails.

Keep in mind that if you have other effeminate characteristics, you may be getting "read" as a cross-dresser, and they might want to know more about that. Often, we think that people are offended, when in fact, they are curious. Some may even want to know you BETTER if they knew you are a cross-dresser or transgendered. You might even fit into some environments BETTER as a girl.

You may want to consider your current environment. Would you fit in as Blair? Would Blair be a better fit than your male side?
Would you rather be working somewhere where you could actually be Blair rather than your male form?

Are you seeing a gender counselor? Have you considered seeing one? Are you considering a gender change?

Are there multiple departments in this retail store? Would Blair fit better in a different department?

Do you like your job and your co-workers? Do you trust any of them enough to let them know that you are transgendered?

Given how much you enjoy the feminine feelings of wearing longer nails, you occur as a transgender - possibly even transsexual.
Have you considered whether you are, or might be, transsexual?

Once you decide who and what you are, you can decide who you want to be in the world.

Could it be that some of your coworkers would like to help you get the kind of help you'd really like to get if you had the courage to ask?

Life is too short to live a double life, pretending to be what you are not, and pretending not to be what you are. It takes energy and people will see through it and have difficulty trusting you.

Don't wait until your in your 30s with 2 kids and a wife who can't accept Blair. Don't wait until you're in your late 50s when you can't be a pretty woman, and you have so much more to lose, and so much less to gain.

Keep your nails long, and tell them "The Real Me wants to come out this way today".

The other alternative is to cut your nails, go back to looking, dressing, and acting like a masculine male, and try to live the lie a little bit longer, or a LOT longer.

Honesty is the best policy - even if it causes a bit of pain in the short run.

[sandra-leigh]

Time to check the policy handbook.

If you are in a retail business that asks you to wear uniforms, then probably there is something in the handbook about nails. If it is not a place that uses uniforms, then there still might be something in the handbook about nails -- and Yes, the handbook might have different rules for men than for women.

As you are in California, your gender expression is protected at state level, and California is not a Right To Work state.

If those things were not true, if you were in (say) Kansas, then you would have to consider how much you were willing to antagonize management who could fire you for no reason, or could reduce your hours greatly.

If you are part of a national chain, the employee handbook would be more likely to contain protection for you.

[Debra Russell]

long nails are not an expression of anything other than personal preference - no more than a stud in your ear and it's no body's business but your own....................Debra

[BlairP]

Thank you all so much for all of the support and intelligent comments. Luckily I am the store owner so its my call. I love my natural nails so much. Everything I touch, especially when I type (50 wpm), is a constant reminder of who I really am. Having had 1/2 inch to 1 inch acrylics many times I would love to grow them even longer! Its thrilling. My question is how long is too long in boy mode?

[paulaprimo]

you go girl!! i think they look great. and to address what is too long for male mode...
i lost my rule book so that's entirely up to you and what your comfort level is...enjoy them! :)

[AllieSF]

From your pics, I think that your nails are at that "almost too long" point. That is my opinion. They look good. I personally like less square and more rounded, but not totally rounded or pointy. My nails normally have that same look in a shorter version all the time.

[brandi.tgurl]

DebbieL.... thanks for going into length about what i said in short. And, I am really surprised at all the responses about to stay employed, "you must do whatever the boss says." That is a very dangerous concept, in my opinion. What if the boss says Blair needs to perform certain acts (of a sexual nature) to stay employed? Would the responses be the same? I doubt it. There are discrimination and harassment laws in every state, and even if your state is a little (or waaaaay) behind the times, there are still federal laws that protect workers from situations like this. It really doesn't have to do with the boss' preferences at all. True, Blair would have more protection and higher ground to stand on, at the end of the day, in an ERA state, but unless the nails actually prevent her from doing her job, or prevents others from doing theirs; there really aren't grounds for anyone to require her to trim them, or leave them uncolored.
There is the question of what kind of retail work she does. I assume, when I hear "retail:" Macy's, H&M, Lane Bryant, Forever 21, Footlocker, even Target, Starbucks, etc. All of which seem to have a very liberal and tolerant interpretation towards "gender bending." I could see, where working in a Big O Tires, or AutoZone might have a different atmosphere. However, unless the nails cause a safety hazard, they isn't much grounds to make a case for her trimming them. There is also a question, of what size of establishment? If Blair is at a national or international chain; she should look at her company's employee handbook, maybe chat with HR about policy, AND read the "worker's rights" posters in her breakroom. If its an SBA, mom and pop type place; how many employees does the owner manage? 50+ and the company falls under Federal and/or State protections - less than 50, and the boss CAN pretty much dictate when, where, and how high to jump.
Doing, or learning, these things will determine what action to do next. Cut and remove polish? keep doing it?
Then, it comes down to how much does the job mean? Or how much is enough. Under discrimination laws, all she should have to say to any heckling is, "I understand your opinion but i enjoy them as they are, thank you, now stop." If it continues, there are grounds for a harassment lawsuit. However, if the company has the right to dictate her appearance, then a suit isn't the right way to go. And, maybe, a new career or job might be in order. Unless, she can live with "male nails" to stay employed here. I know the market is bad, so its a tough call on that one.

*edit... missed Blair's reply. haha. as the store owner? i say, those look wonderful.. be proud and show em off. and make it a policy for all employees to have long and painted nails. j/k on that last part ;)

But, remember that one lady, who refused to sit at the back of the bus; what was her name? ...

[ReineD]

I work at a retail store and I am starting to get funny looks and comments by customers and coworkers. My god they are just nails but people have such strong opinions about them. Sometimes I feel self conscious but mostly I dont give a shit any more. I love my girly nails very much and they help me to e press my fem self all day long in a really real and up front way. I keep then very clean and polish them twice a week.

Do any of you have any thoughts or experience with this?

My SO has finger nails your length, except hers are filed in the pointier style. She's not in retail plus she is middle aged, so the vast majority of people that we know who do notice, keep their opinions to themselves.

One of my friends once asked my SO, while a group of us were sitting together at a restaurant, if my SO played the guitar. It was obvious that she was trying to find out why my SO's fingernails were so long. My SO simply looked her straight in the eyes and said, "No". I do think that more people notice as you say, and maybe the more intuitive people put two and two together. But, no one can control this and if you like long fingernails and you don't mind the possibility of having people wonder, just enjoy your nails! :)

It's a trade-off and only you can determine what is most important to you. My SO's nails are more important to her than what people may or may not think and this is her prerogative.

[mikiSJ]

Wear them as long as you AND you boss think is appropriate. If your boss doesn't mind, then you simply need to get over the comments.

What kind of retail are you in: an auto parts store or a household goods store. I think the work environment should be taken into consideration.

[rita63]

I try to keep my nails longer but I work with food and the public health laws up here are fairly strict. Never any polish or fake nails and they better be clean and short. I work in a Health Care setting with mainly women and there is an element of anti male sexism in the place. Coming out trans would give the more vicious gossips a field day, including the male union president. A few years till retirement and then they will get as long as I want.

Blair as a former business owner I think my customers comments would have been the deciding factor, they pay the piper and call the tune.

hugs rita

[linda allen]

Your nails are very pretty, but suitable for a female. If they cause problems at work, you should keep them shorter. Don't wait for your boss to order you to cut your nails, if co-workers or customers are commenting, it's time to cut them.

Don't count on laws to protect you from having to cut your nails. If it gets to that point, your company will find another way to get rid of you or cause you to quit. Are they worth it? In the long run, probably not.

[Lyndaloves]

I worked in an enviroment that long nails were snapped or cracked regularly.
Now that I am retired they are growing out nicely unless I get stuck rebuilding a patio outside.
I keep mine in a rounded pointer style and when they do get long the SO is on my back about my girlie nails.
She knows of my CDing and has ordered me to stop, a year ago.
So I am back deep in the closet again.
As far as nail length goes no one would really care how long they are except,
the beautiful shiny pink polished look really draws attention to them.

Lynda

[Ressie]

Thank you all so much for all of the support and intelligent comments. Luckily I am the store owner so its my call. I love my natural nails so much. Everything I touch, especially when I type (50 wpm), is a constant reminder of who I really am. Having had 1/2 inch to 1 inch acrylics many times I would love to grow them even longer! Its thrilling. My question is how long is too long in boy mode?

Cool, you're your own boss, but what are you selling? It sounds like girly nails don't quite fit with the type of customers you have. I can see them fitting in well in some retail clothing stores, but if you sell power tools that's a different story. You probably don't want to turn your customers off if you're serious about your business. I think there a little long for boy mode myself.

[Aly Cat]

I think they are very pretty nails. I would say if it is becoming an issue for those around you and it is work related, take the white part down maybe half way and just keep them polished and clean. Clean polished nails are relatively common (at least here around Atlanta) on guys from what I have noticed. Even my manager gets his nails shaped and polished, though he keeps them relatively short. I can still see a hint of white where they just barely stick out from the tip of his fingers. This slightly shorter length is common even with GGs though. They just keep them polished with a clear coat or hint of pink and call it a day. So maybe do that? If it was anywhere else like in general public, id say screw what others think and do your nails the way you want; french manicure and all! ;)

Edit: I just saw your post where you said you are the store owner. Screw what anyone else thinks! You're the boss!

[Cynthia99]

I think Lynn is right. I grew my nails out about that long a few months ago, and no one said anything. I rounded them a lot more and suspect they were not as noticeable due to that - although I did (And do) normally wear nail hardner/topcoat. Usually, its the matte one by Opi, but I do wear the shinier one - and no one has said anything. I do keep them shorter (Long nails make it difficult to play guitar, although some people grow their right hand out and use for fingerpicking style. And some guitarists have the acrylic nails on at least a couple of fingers of that hand.

[Vickie_CDTV]

Even in a state with gender expression laws, even in a non "right-to-work" state, if you boss doesn't like you for any reason your head can still end up on the chopping block. If a boss sees an employee as a liability, when it comes time to cut employees' hours (which many businesses are doing right now), or cut employees entirely, they will be at the head of the list.

If one is in an "at will" state, they can fire you for any reason at all. Even with gender expression laws, the day you are a minute late to work they can fire you. Unless they are dumb enough to tell you it is because of your expression, they can get away with saying anything.

If your employer objects to your nails, cut them and keep your job; better short nails and eating, than long nails and going hungry. I am not saying that is right, but that is just the way the world works sadly.

[Chickhe]

...you are the store, its your call. But, if you are asking what works without raising eyebrows? I think no shine and about 1/8th to 3/16th of an inch...which seems to pass either way. Works for me.

[natalialimapoa]

Theres a guy that owns a really macho hamburguer restaurant near my house. He has really feminine eyebrows that call everyones attention. Guess what? Nobody cares, everyone thinks he is gay and thats it. And he seems happy all the time.

[Bootsiegalore]

My question is how long is too long in boy mode?

Probably bitten off at the end of the finger! LOL!

R

[cdtraveler]

Have to agree the nails look good. I would love to grow mine out too bit have a spouse and young kids feelings to factor into the equation. Still my secret compromise is to manicure them to the nth degree keep them filed smooth and femshaped but just keep them short. I've done the same with a gradual :row reshaping. Makes me feel girly w/o jeopardizing job or family.

Amanda

[Jennifer in CO]

to answer your question - too long is when they get in your way. Mine are about the same length as yours and have been longer but I don't let them get past 1/4" anymore because past that they get in the way of typing, working on cars, etc.

[candydawn75]

Had a "friend" on Facebook that commented on long nails on guys saying how bad they looked. She is no longer a friend. I did however ask her if there was ever a time she let her legs or underarm hair grow when no one would notice!! ;p
Mine aren't as long as yours but they tend to break.

[Sometimes Steffi]

[QUOTE=BlairP;3279940]
My question is how long is too long in boy mode?
/QUOTE]

Sorry to tell you this, but they are twice as long as acceptable in boy mode, IMHO. That doesn't mean you should trim thrm, but that's not what you asked

[Rogina B]

I am very surprised at all the negativity..they are only fingernails and she is the boss! And they look great! All good!

[linda allen]

I am very surprised at all the negativity..they are only fingernails and she is the boss! And they look great! All good!

# 1, We didn't know she was the "boss" until later in the thread, not at the beginning.

# 2, When you're dealing with the public, everyone is your boss!

[Jenniferathome]

If you were my guy friend, I would give you shit too and I'm a cross dresser! It's what guys do

[DebbieL]

Keep in mind that when women give you a hard time about your long nails, it's usually envy. Men don't really care as long as you aren't making unsolicited advances at them. You say that you own the store. You get to decide.

When someone mentions them, just ASK - "Do you like them?" - you might be surprised at how much positive feedback you are getting.

[Rogina B]

I love the logic expressed about the customers!! We aren't sure what Blair does cause she hasn't told us..However,[in my best Phil Donahue voice] I'll say" You mean to sit there and tell us that if a guy needs a new muffler bearing[lol] to pass Cali inspection,he won't buy it from Blair cause her nails are too long and pretty? And Susy Homemaker doesn't want to buy a new vacuum cleaner from Blair because her nails are like her own? Let's just imagine what Blair's store could be selling for a minute..If it is food,there are codes to follow... I doubt that any customer [other than a member of the "hater's church"] would avoid purchasing because the seller or cashier's nails are longer and better groomed than their own.

[Ellie52]

Not sure if its been mentioned but just say you are learning (playing) the guitar and need long nails (look at Mark Knopflers) to fingerpick. I do play guitar and would use that excuse if anybody commented which they havent. It also gives you the excuse to varnish them as you can say its nail strengthener...Hope this helps...Ellie

[Jenniferathome]

Not sure if its been mentioned but just say you are learning (playing) the guitar and need long nails ...

but that is only on ONE hand. The other has to be short. And of course, if someone asked you to play something, you might give yourself away if you instead pulled out a tuba becuase you can't play the guitar.

[sandra-leigh]

Learn to pluck the strings using each of the hands. Ambiguitarist :-)

(I am pre-beginner on guitar, but when I do some minor experiments with it, some days it feels better in one arm, and some days it feels better in the other.)

[Ellie52]

but that is only on ONE hand. The other has to be short. And of course, if someone asked you to play something, you might give yourself away if you instead pulled out a tuba becuase you can't play the guitar.
Check out Australian shred guitarist Orianthi. She has long nails and plays guitar, granted they are a bit shorter on her left hand but beggers cant be choosers. Ellie

[BlairP]

So cute...lol...I should make it policy that all employees have long polished nails!

Wow, I didnt expect so many amazing comments from all angles. Here is the lowdown: I own a store in Venice Beach, CA. We sell cool and unique small products to tourists and locals and visitors. There are all kinds of strange people around. If I cant have long nails here then I don't know where I can. But the truth is, despite being such an eclectic mix of people, long nails on men really seems to cause a stir. I notice my employees looking at them all of the time. One of them said 'holy shit, you have dragon claws". But I am getting used to it. I guess because the growth is so gradual that it has eased me into it. Right now I just don't care. They are getting a little scary long and I may file them down and keep them that length when they get there, but for now I am letting them grow even longer.

I am tired of hiding. I dont want to have a sex change operation. I am not gay. But I am transgendered and I dont want to hide any longer. For as freaked out or intrigued as everybody else is, I am equally surprised at how nice it feels to express my feminine side in public. It has seemed to neutralize a lot of anxiety for me (for now) and I am proud of not being ashamed for the first time in my life. I have already rehearsed what I want to say to my staff. "Yes, I have long girly fingernails. No, I do not want a sex change. I am just fascinated by girl stuff. I am not a creep or a perv or a weirdo. I just really like all of the things that are reserved for women only. Not only am I not gay, I love women so much that I like pretend to be one sometimes. Its a total mind trip and incredibly fascinating to get into the head (and pumps) of the opposite sex. But it is more than just a hobby; something I like to do. I was this way when I was 5 years old. Its who I am. I have long girly nails and I like them that way very much. Does anybody have a problem with that? If so, lets talk about it."

I dont now what is stranger...having long nails or thinking it is strange to have long nails. And please keep in mind that I keep them extremely clean, a task I have found to be more work as my nails grow but I love it. Ummm...nails grow naturally right? And where in the human handbook does it say that they have to be cut before they get a certain length. So strange. Everybody is so programmed (including me) and I am tired of it. I have broken free. I no longer subscribe to the binary gender identification system that dominates our world to the core. It served us well for centuries and now its time to break through and realize that genders come in wonderfully infinite varieties. We are all part masculine and part feminine. I am going to start expressing my feminine side however I see fit. Right now its nails. Who knows, next year I might come to work wearing my thigh high silver stiletto boots (probably not - maybe for Halloween?)

I see so many girls in here who are clearly terrified of expressing their feminine selves in public (including me). Until this stops we will be relegated to third-class citizens or worse. I was talking to a colleague of mine at work and commenting on one of the most amazing people in the group. I jokingly said to my colleague "I dont know about Neil, he is way to perfect. He has to have something wrong with him...dead bodies under his floorboards or something" and my colleague responded by saying "no, he probably dresses up in his wives clothes and dances around". That is what we are dealing with, a condition perceived by many to be worse than or equivalent to being a murderer! We all know how trannies are portrayed in the movies.

I have really long nails and I am a guy. And you know what? They look amazing...way better than any acrylics I have ever had (and I have spent $120 for a full set) and way better than any of the nails that the 100 women a day who come to my store have. Even better, they feel extremely sensual and feminine. I am keeping them.

ta ta

Blaire

[Persephone]

Sorry to hear that you are getting negative comments on your nails, Blair.

Your location says "Los Angeles,"" so it is really annoying that you are getting negativity here in the bastion of "different."


http://i3.photobucket.com/albums/y53/sandylewiscares/92c1bca2-107b-408b-9cf2-173a18875058_zpsf0c786ed.jpg

My nails have been about this long for the past fifteen years and I get some, but not much, static every once in a while. Sometimes I get asked if I play guitar.

If pressed for why I have 'em I just say it makes it easier to clean out my ears (or, sometime, my nose). Then I go to shake hands with them.

Hugs,
Persephone.

[Tracii G]

Good comeback Persephone LOLOLOL.
Blair no need for a long drawn out explanation with your employees if they ask questions just answer you like them that long.Plus it makes it easier to pick out the toejam between your toes.
Orrrrrrrrrr you could go into work as Blair and act like its no big deal.

[Rogina B]

Good comeback Persephone LOLOLOL.

Orrrrrrrrrr you could go into work as Blair and act like its no big deal.

That sounds like the best plan! Freedom of expression lesson! Teach em!

[linda allen]

but that is only on ONE hand. The other has to be short. And of course, if someone asked you to play something, you might give yourself away if you instead pulled out a tuba becuase you can't play the guitar.

True, the left (for right handed pickers) hand must have short fingernails or you can't make the chords or notes. Even the part about the right hand is pretty bogus. I don't know any guitar players (and I know a lot because I was a pro) who have long fingernails on either hand.

As for claiming to be a guitar player, lies generally get you deeper and deeper until you can't cover the lie anymore. "What kind of guitar do you have?" "What model?" "What brand of strings do you use?", etc.

[linda allen]

Wow, I didnt expect so many amazing comments from all angles. Here is the lowdown: I own a store in Venice Beach, CA. We sell cool and unique small products to tourists and locals and visitors. There are all kinds of strange people around. If I cant have long nails here then I don't know where I can. But the truth is, despite being such an eclectic mix of people, long nails on men really seems to cause a stir. I notice my employees looking at them all of the time. One of them said 'holy shit, you have dragon claws".

Blair, you could have saved a lot of confusion by posting that part in your original post.

You are the boss and you can do what you want. If it's affecting business or bothering your employees to the point where they are not giving their best to the job, you might want to keep them a more normal male length. If not, do what you want with them. It's your choice.

[Ressie]

Heck Blair, just create a new image for the store and go total en femme! It might increase your business big time.

[heatherdress]

Blair - can I work for you? I won't say anything about your nails and promise to follow the owner's example.

[Zylia]

I think it's the pinkish clear nail polish that would get my attention first, not necessarily the length.

[Lynn Marie]

You know, it sure would have been nice to have known the full story before making a darn fool of myself! Extracting foot from mouth. If your customers don't seem to care, then get dressed and really have a good time!

[Vickie_CDTV]

Since the dynamic of power is in your favor, there is nothing your employees can do about your nail length. If they complain, tell them there are places they can go where guys have short nails, like the unemployment office.

[BlairP]

Zylia (nice name) the pink is only noticable is some light. Its not outrageous. Honestly I would love to paint them french manicure style. Now that would be extremely feminine. I dont know if I could pull that off and not feel extremely self-consious. But that is where I am leaning. Going to paint them that way over the weekend and see if I have the courage to go to work on Tuesday.


My SO has finger nails your length, except hers are filed in the pointier style. She's not in retail plus she is middle aged, so the vast majority of people that we know who do notice, keep their opinions to themselves.

One of my friends once asked my SO, while a group of us were sitting together at a restaurant, if my SO played the guitar. It was obvious that she was trying to find out why my SO's fingernails were so long. My SO simply looked her straight in the eyes and said, "No". I do think that more people notice as you say, and maybe the more intuitive people put two and two together. But, no one can control this and if you like long fingernails and you don't mind the possibility of having people wonder, just enjoy your nails! :)

It's a trade-off and only you can determine what is most important to you. My SO's nails are more important to her than what people may or may not think and this is her prerogative.


Theres a guy that owns a really macho hamburguer restaurant near my house. He has really feminine eyebrows that call everyones attention. Guess what? Nobody cares, everyone thinks he is gay and thats it. And he seems happy all the time.

[Courtney . J]

i think you should skip work one day ,. get dolled up and go to the store as a customer ,. and just see how long it takes anybody to notice you ,. then if they do and say something ,. just reply with something like "i was wondering when somebody would notice ,. now get your butt to work ! " :heehee:

[DanielleT]

I wear my nails very long and of course, after the weekend there is always the tell tale stains around the corner of my nailbeds that I have been wearing polish. Hmm, OK, along with my obviously pierced ears and the way I walk and hold myself, I am a woman. I don't flaunt, I also don't try and hide it.

[MssHyde]

very nice looking hands and nails, it would hurt to cut them, I'd have a tough time trimming them. I'd have a tougher time not painting them hot pink.

[joan47]

You sound just like me, I just want to be more feminine. I have long painted nails and very thin arched eyebrows.

Do you thin and shape your eyebrows, if not, that should be next

[Richelle423]

I get **** from my SO for just using clear nail polish and anything girlie...:-(

[SophieKitty]

I don't know how I'll react when I get "shit" from people. But my plan is to give them twice as much in return. Or even make fun of myself. I even said "this isn't even my final form" to one of my male friends yesterday, and we laughed it all off.

[FeliciaCDSNJ]

I was reading online that more and more guys are starting to get acrylic nails and most of the comments, I love to read the comments to see how people react, and I would say about 90% were for it because they say it is about time guys started taking care of their nails. It is sad that you got such reactions like that. Guess that would mean those people were extremely closed minded.

[Amy R Lynn]

I agree that they are just nails. It really shouldn't be that big of a deal. I have had mine painted with a light bubble gum pink color. I got called out on it. Some of the people that I work with asked me about it. I just told them that I liked the way they looked. After that they never said anything else. I think after the shock wore off, it was just a part of who I am.

[BlairP]

UPDATE: Not only did I not cut them, I let them grow and painted them french manicure style...I am in heaven. They look and feel extremely sexy. I am getting daring too...right now I am at the state franchise tax board waiting for them to call my number. Starting to accept that this is who I am and what I like. Soon I will be up close and personal with a clerk. Long girlie nails are so fun! And yes I am in guy mode so it is also scary.

[Tina_gm]

I sometimes grow my nails a bit long for a guy... I fantasize of having long girly nails.... I let them get to the point where they just start getting past the tip of the finger. Usually I keep them right around even with my fingertips.

[BlairP]

Gendermutt right now mine are about .25" past the tips of my fingers. I have already learned to type like this. The Indian lady at the counter did a triple take. I know people who see must think I look silly but isnt that the problem with crossdressing? Less than 1 percent of us can pass so in any form we look silly to others. If I didnt adore my nails so much and if I had not spent the last year in therapy I wouldnt be brave enough to do this.

[Persephone]

Your nails and your courage are both wonderful, Blair!

One aside -- you photoed them curled under. That is usually the "guy way" of looking at nails. Women tend to hold the hand straight when doing a nail check.

Hugs,
Persephone.

[Tina_gm]

Gendermutt right now mine are about .25" past the tips of my fingers. I have already learned to type like this. The Indian lady at the counter did a triple take. I know people who see must think I look silly but isnt that the problem with crossdressing? Less than 1 percent of us can pass so in any form we look silly to others. If I didnt adore my nails so much and if I had not spent the last year in therapy I wouldnt be brave enough to do this.well I think they look awesome and I envy you. My life is what is is, I have two teenage boys being raised in a small town and may be one day I will be able to have those kinds of nails, but not right now. Good for you though, cuz I could and do care less what strangers think, its my loved ones friends, family and kids whom I must protect from the fashion nazi society we live in

[BlairP]

Persephone lol...I lome at them and took pictures of them both ways...makes sense right? Thank you for saying I am brave...I feel brave.

Gendermutt...I feel for you. Its a really crappy situation...we cds are all treated so poorly. The sooner it changes the better off we will all be.

Ta ta

Blaire

[Tina_gm]

society can suck big time. Personally I do not care much what people think of me. Unless I am in a truck stop in say Alabama or a biker joint where I may be physically threatened, I'd probably click them so people would notice and just be amused by the reactions. But- when it comes to my kids, my wife, family and friends.... I don't need them taking crap for my individuality or gender expression. Its not fair but its the hand we are dealt.

[MonctonGirl]

Wow - this thread is smoking-hot!

At first, I figured you could just buy a used harp and say they help you play it.
( If you had long nails on only one hand, you could say you play classical guitar. )

After seeing the nails, while they are nicer than most women's nails, I agree with Lynn Marie - since they are ...unusual for a male. When you say "retail" I don't know if you mean a women's clothing store ( where you could probably get away with it ) or your local TARGET or Wal-Mart... where they are likely to be fearful of Human Rights issues, so they'd never DEMAND you change them - but are likely to fire you without cause or take away shifts until you leave on your own.... or if you work at Home Depot, where a male with long nails would be "way out there".

If you did not have the french tips - probably nobody would notice.
Since you do - it may be a safety hazard to customers ( servers in many large chains who handle money and interface with customers for transactions are requiring short nails due risk of injuring a customer's hands and the liability that implies )

If you want to keep your nails AND your job ... you need to think of some type of fundraiser for justifying your nails --- November means men grow moustaches (MOVEMBER) for prostate cancer research. What can we think of that would allow guys to grow their nails and manicure them? Maybe get a bunch of SPONSORS who give you $5 every month you have them done like that and you give the money to UTERINE CANCER RESEARCH ( the undetectable silent killer with no screening test .... so lethal because it goes unoticed ...unlike your nails.

[BlairP]

Moncton that is great...I dont want an excuse though. I just want to be who I am...a girly boy...I lkke girly stuff and dont want to hide it.

[Tina_gm]

You appear to be in a position where you can do this and only get some neg comments or stares.... In a small town I have to think about my kids and family in general. society may be wrong IMO but it is what it is. I have to protect them somewhat. I could fight society, but my family will suffer from it, so I keep my nails shorter than what I would like. You on the other hand can do what you want with them and if I were you I would be doing just the same. I do not regret bringing children into this world growing up to be men. I enjoy fatherhood immensely. It's just one of those things I have to compromise on.

[BlairP]

I hear you Gendermutt. I feel for you.

[Macy4KH]

let me start by saying i love your nails. i have grown my nails out in the past and i understand what you mean by the way they make you feel so keep them long. i noticed that people would only coment on them if they were painted. try letting them look natural.

[aleflour]

Your nails are so pretty! I would love to have nails like that! The only way I can have nails like that is by getting acrylic ones put on. someday I hope to have real ones though.

[Aly Cat]

Very nice nails! I keep growing mine out and when they start to get nice and long, I'll catch them on something and rip half of it off. It really sucks and really hurts. I hate working in retail where that is the norm. Maybe when i move away from here and start my new life, I'll get them done like that. I really like that look. For now, I'll just live vicariously through you and curse every time I break another nail. Thanks for sharing the pic!!

[Brooklyn]

Nails are a natural part of your body, just like hair. If you're going to have longish nails, don't be ashamed of them. Own them, take great care of them, get a manicure often. Set a good example and go make tons of money for your company. Be the rich guy with the awesome nails! :rose:

[Jessica giovanna]

I absolutely love the nails. I have always grown out my nails and dare anyone to say anything to me! Nice nails appear to me that someone takes care of their body...that is my reasoning....and here are mine