Neighbors have gone from nosey to very unfreindly

[andreanna]

Hmm, where to start. I have been dressing for quite a while now and live alone. When I moved into this house my neighbor was always checking to see what I was doing when I would go out the door. One day he started talking about his religious belief and I promptly told him that I do not talk religion with anyone. Anyway, after being in this place for about 1.5 years now, I was going into the garage and I was made by the neighbor. Yes I was dressed, forms wig, skirt, tank top the works and feeling really good. He called my name, I turned around and the look on his face was priceless, Well that was about a month ago now and he still has not said hello again and has made a beeline for his house or garage if I happen to come outside when he is around. Doesn't matter if I am in drab now. Oh well, I guess I will continue live with his intolerance and live my own life.

[linda allen]

In real life, you may or may not like your neighbors (and vice versa). It's great if you can be friends with them, you get each others mail when they are on vacation, feed the cat, watch the house, mow the lawn, etc.

Unfortunately, this isn't always the case. We are friends with the neighbors on both sides, pretty good friends with the ones directly across the street (but wouldn't trust them with a key, etc.), but not real friendly with the guy and his kids diagonally across the street who backed into my wife's car, whose son shot his brother inside the house while "playing" with his father's gun, and who, along with his juvenile delinquent son, got arrested for drug possesion. We were friends with his wife before she left him and moved away.

Don't worry about your neighbor. Smile and wave at him when you see him and go on about your business. He is entitled to his beliefs as long as he doesn't demand that you believe the same.

[Michelle James]

All my neighbors know about me now. We are neighbors but we are certainly not neighborly. I am well aware of the talk behind my back and really don't give a shit. Most will wave or nod when I drive by and for the most part are cordial, but i doubt I will be invited for tea anytime soon. Ahh we are planning on moving within the next 6 months anyway.

[Kate Simmons]

It's amazing to have that kind of power, isn't it Hon? :battingeyelashes::)

[Nicole Erin]

There are a few idiots on my street also. I do not associate with my neighbors, I have no desire to.

Unless you are in a small town with few options, there isn't much need to deal with neighbors. Too many other people to be friends with out there.

[Tracii G]

You took him to a place he is scared to go or he is still trying to comprehend what he saw.
Just be nice and wave maybe and he'll get over it.
The old man next to me was kind of the same way when he saw me dressed for the first time.
He told me later he didn't know what to say.If he sees me enfemme now he just waves and says hello ma'am with a smile on his face.

[Lorileah]

Did you smile? If you smiled he may have taken that as an invitation, you Jezebel. You didn't smile? Well then he took it as you are devil spawn. My direct neighbors on either side don't talk, smile,wave, flip me off... They act like I don't exist. Now if I could just do the same with their dog

[kimdl93]

It's really none of his business how you dress and none of your concern how he may feel about you. Just go about your business and hope that he can mind his. As Linda said, it's nice to have friendly relations with neighbors, but that isn't always the way things work out.

[Lynn Marie]

Go on over and ask him to tell you more about his religion!

[celeste26]

Frankly as long as he doesn't go around preaching at you, it should make no difference to you. You dont feel the need for his approval do you? If not then dont worry either. Life is just too short for that.

[Chickhe]

Personally, I feel bad when people avoid me. Except, I'm a shy person and keep to myself, so that's probably what they feel towards me. But, anyway...what really bugs me the most is not knowing how to respond. So, its almost better to just confront this guy (because he was friendly in the past) and bluntly ask him if that's why he doesn't say hi anymore. If he says he doesn't believe in it, just politely say you respect his view and tell him you are sorry about shocking him. At least you have a chance to educate him a little and show him otherwise you are the same as before. Could be he just doesn't know what to do...

[Kelley]

Oh well his loss.

Kelley

[Karren H]

Go on over and ask him to tell you more about his religion!

Or invite him over for a lingerie party! lol

[robindee36]

Sounds like your presentation enfemme trumped his zeal to discuss religion. I must remember this for the next time the front porch preachers come a calling here.

Stay strong remembering we rock girl.

Hugs, Robin

[Annaliese]

My sister in-law was mad at me for years, not even my fault, one day she told my wife ( her sister) that she was not mad at me any more, her reason it does not do any good to be mad at someone that does not care. So indifference trumps intolerance, live your life as it they are not even there.

[Loni]

Sounds like your presentation enfemme trumped his zeal to discuss religion. I must remember this for the next time the front porch preachers come a calling here.

Stay strong remembering we rock girl.

Hugs, Robin


I am going to remember this the next time the recruiters come a calling,
might even invite them in for a beer?

[robindee36]

Loni, we could be on to something here. I suppose the strategy could be extended to door to door solicitors and a wealth of troublesome bell ringers. On your side of the equation, if they're cute and interested, an invitation in might be just the thing.

Finally, a thread we can have a bit of fun with. No serious, heady issues. No snarking. We need to have more of these, or I need to search through a lot more threads to find the light hearted ones.

Hugs, Robin

[Lorileah]

Go on over and ask him to tell you more about his religion!:go: Kind of a reverse mission. "Hi I'm ___________ can you tell me about_______?"

[EllieOPKS]

Doesn't sound like you are losing much by not associating with the neighbor. I have 2 that watch EVERYTHING I do. I have not been caught be either of them while I am dressed, at least they don't act like it. I walked out the back door with a skirt on to check my rain gauge and didn't realize what I had done until I headed for the house. No one has spoken of this atrocity, we will all 3 carry it to our graves.

[Lori Kurtz]

You took him to a place he is scared to go or he is still trying to comprehend what he saw.
Just be nice and wave maybe and he'll get over it.
The old man next to me was kind of the same way when he saw me dressed for the first time.
He told me later he didn't know what to say.If he sees me enfemme now he just waves and says hello ma'am with a smile on his face.

Now there's a good neighbor!

[jillleanne]

Hmm, where to start. I have been dressing for quite a while now and live alone. When I moved into this house my neighbor was always checking to see what I was doing when I would go out the door. One day he started talking about his religious belief and I promptly told him that I do not talk religion with anyone. Anyway, after being in this place for about 1.5 years now, I was going into the garage and I was made by the neighbor. Yes I was dressed, forms wig, skirt, tank top the works and feeling really good. He called my name, I turned around and the look on his face was priceless, Well that was about a month ago now and he still has not said hello again and has made a beeline for his house or garage if I happen to come outside when he is around. Doesn't matter if I am in drab now. Oh well, I guess I will continue live with his intolerance and live my own life.

Perfect! I say fences make the best neighbours anyway. Try dressing as a nun some day and take him over some cookies. lol

[Eryn]

I'm rather glad that my neighbors aren't terribly familiar. The less familiarity I have with them the less likely it will be that my CDing will cause a problem. If we were friends and I backed out of my driveway dressed, they'd be looking at me closely and perhaps even wanting me to stop and chat. As it is, they may glance in my direction, but if they see long brown hair they will dismiss it as my spouse.

Here in SoCal it is more common to choose friends who have common interests than friends who live next door. I like it that way.

[andreanna]

hell, I really don't care to much about him or his thoughts. Just a curious observation of those that think they are just a bit better than you. It is in a small town, and he and his wife kind of think they own the neighborhood since they had been here for a length of time and just cannot get it thru their head that I grew up here and have moved back into the neighbor hood and house that I grew up in. Nosy neighbors, who needs them, but I like the idea of the lingerie party. haha

[docrobbysherry]

Count yourself lucky, Andreanna.

I used to have a neighbor next door across a 3' fence. (Not allowed to build any higher there!) Whenever I came out on my patio, she'd corral me and start some godawful monologue about anything and everything under the sun. Soon, my mind wished to die! I quite going outside for fear of her seeing me.

One day, my painters pissed her off! She was mad at me for months and turned away whenever she saw me. Those were some of my BEST TIMES out in the patio! Unfortunately, she forgave me and I had to move! Sigh!

[vanitysumers]

I remember a while back when I had someone trying to find out what I was upto.

they would always try to discover the secret.

I once just let someone find out the secret because we almost came to blows and I wanted them to know that a guy who wears dresses,looks good in them and is over 6' 1"

is no push over.

I know some don't aprove but I don't care and if they are going to try that kiddie stuff with me we are gonna have some problems and I am not smiling

[Tawne]

Xmas is coming up, buy a small gift IE: 6-pack of beer, and leave it at his doorstep (to the side not so someone trips over), and a note IE: rough piece of paper NOT card that says Merry Xmas - <Insert name here>

[Tracii G]

Its been a while back but I had some people from a local church canvasing the neighborhood and I answered the door wearing pink PJ's.
The pastor and his wife just stood there in shock, never said a word and just turned around and went on their way.

[Persephone]

Some of the situations mentioned so far on this thread may appear to be hopeless, but most of the others appear to be opportunities. How many more people would be on "our side" in social acceptance and in legislative support if each of us managed to "convert" just two people?

Instead of talk about ignoring them or bluster about how we could beat them physically, why not sit them down over a cuppa tea and have a chat with them, explaining what transgender is all about?

Hugs,
Persephone.

[Sarah Beth]

I wish I lived out somewhere where I had no neighbors. Even the ones who don't live right next door here are so nosey it's just down right annoying. Then they get angry of the least little thing, like one day I came home and UPS had left a package for me and a neighbor was there looking it over. The best one was once while I was gone for the day working an old friend of my wife and I stopped by the house as he was passing through town. She called me and told me he was there but I was 15 miles away and no way to get there to see him. As soon as I got home the neighbor lady from across the street rushed over to tell me some strange man had spent over two hours inside my house while I was gone. When I told her to mind her own business she told me she was just looking out for my best interests.

If you have neighbors you just have to put up with the nonsense and try to be pleasant. The rest is up to them.

[regina young]

Andreanna, love the name. Having neighbors is like having family, sometimes we don't see eye-to-eye. I had a neighbor once who was quite a crotchety old sort. Once during a three year drought we got into a disagreement over water rights, it became quite heated even after I offered for him to allow his horses onto my property to water as many times a day as he needed to. Anyway he would not talk to, or acknowledge me in any way. I would wave to him, talk to him, even left a couple of gifts for him, all to no avail. Finally I was coming down the road one day very close to Christmas and there he was coming up the road leading a couple of horses. Knowing he could not retreat, I parked my car in the middle of the road, got out and began to walk along side of him. I greeted him and made small talk, he was so sour faced, but I persisted (something I am good at, ask my wife) finally he broke like a twig his face softened and he began to take part in our exchange. Later that week I left a tin of homemade cookies and roasted pecans on his porch for Christmas. We remained true neighbors, even after I moved to a larger farm, until he passed about ten years a ago. There is always hope.
Good Luck,
Regina

[daviolin]

Good for you girl. I hate nosy neighbors. Looks like you solved the problem. Daviolin

[Jill]

Hey thanks for the tip on how to get religious people to leave me alone. ;)

[lingerieLiz]

Don't worry about it, life without him will be better. I would quit trying to be inconspicuous. Wait till he is out and go get your mail. Better yet take some cookies over while he is at work and make friends with his wife. Wear a cute dress when you do it.

[dragdoll]

Some of the situations mentioned so far on this thread may appear to be hopeless, but most of the others appear to be opportunities. How many more people would be on "our side" in social acceptance and in legislative support if each of us managed to "convert" just two people?

Instead of talk about ignoring them or bluster about how we could beat them physically, why not sit them down over a cuppa tea and have a chat with them, explaining what transgender is all about?

Hugs,
Persephone.

No. Never. Not in a million years. These people need to be avoided at all costs to the point that they are practically invisible to you. You can never change the mind of a bigoted moron. But you can beat them senseless if they try to physically attack you.

[MadisonL]

I cant wait to move into the country. I am a very private sort of person. Personally, there is no reason I can see to spend time on neighbors, if they cant be nice and open minded then they can stay away.

[linda allen]

............... You can never change the mind of a bigoted moron. ............

That's not true. Many of the people who were dead set against racial integration eventually came to realize that it was wrong and that all people should be treated equally. Some didn't of course, but many did.

I don't understand all this negativity towards one's neighbors. Life is too short to spend it hating people unless you have a really good reason.

[dragdoll]

That's not true. Many of the people who were dead set against racial integration eventually came to realize that it was wrong and that all people should be treated equally. Some didn't of course, but many did.

I don't understand all this negativity towards one's neighbors. Life is too short to spend it hating people unless you have a really good reason.

Right, but remember the people who changed their mind about racial integration were obviously intelligent, whereas the ones that didn't are forever ignorant and should be rejected.

Some people do have a really good reason to hate their neighbors. The scum that live 4 houses down from me turned a decent rental property into a drug house.

[Kelly DeWinter]

........................ Instead of talk about ignoring them or bluster about how we could beat them physically, why not sit them down over a cuppa tea and have a chat with them, explaining what transgender is all about?

Hugs,
Persephone.

Love the response, sounds like the proper way to talk.

In addition , at least you now have a meeting home for you other TG/CD friends.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Andreanna, He may still be shell shocked and will probably need counseling now.

[Allison Chaynes]

Every time I read a thread about neighbors, it tempts me to go out to check the mail in my most feminine dress. My neighbors are political refugees from a country in the Middle East that likes to call America the "Great Satan", and yet the lady of that family still talks to me the same after seeing me mow my yard in a skirt, even down here in the Bible Belt.

[DarciB]

I can relate to that, my boyfriend and I live together as a couple, we have been together for 2 years now. I'm sure all the neighbors wonder, they see us going to work, me dressed drab during the workweek, then on the weekend, I "magically"turn into a woman and they see us going out for a night. We are beyond that now, they can think whatever they want, as long as they leave us alone.

[linda allen]

......... Some people do have a really good reason to hate their neighbors. The scum that live 4 houses down from me turned a decent rental property into a drug house.

OK, that's a good enough reason, but why not resolve it by calling the police every time you see any drug activity? If the home is in a community with restrictive covenants, that would be another avenue. Report them to the HOA or whatever group enforces the covenants. Do both.

[Maria in heels]

I think that you should just ignore him. Don't pay him any mind, and just go about your way. They weren't great neighbors by what you describe anyways after a year and a half.

[Dianne S]

My neighbors are political refugees from a country in the Middle East that likes to call America the "Great Satan", and yet the lady of that family still talks to me the same after seeing me mow my yard in a skirt, even down here in the Bible Belt.

I'm not sure which country you mean, but if you're referring to Iran, I am not surprised. Persians historically are among the most cultured and tolerant people in the Middle East; the current reign of terror by theocrats in their country is not a reflection on the Iranian people in general.

[lingerieLiz]

I just think that it is fun to yank peoples chains from time to time. Today most people don't know their neighbors. So they see someone come and go and can't figure out what they are up to. You might want to get some religious signs for your front yard.

[Beverley Sims]

You probably did yourself a favour.
Let it be known that you come from Mars next. :)

[linda allen]

..... Today most people don't know their neighbors. ............

My former neighbors on one side used to come over and sit on the porch and drink with us in the evenings. Same for the woman diagonally across the street until she left her husband and moved away. I help the one on the other side with home repairs and fixing up his trailer for his yard work. He gets my mail when we are away and we get his. He mows our lawn if we're away and it needs it.

You don't have to know your neighbors if you don't want to, but in many ways it's a nicer neighborhood if you do. Good neighbors will watch your house when you are away and call you or the police or fire department if necessary.

We've had pretty much the same situation wherever we have lived. Neighbors helping neighbors.