Easier to come out to GG's than other guys....

[heathr1]

I find this, do you?

[mariehart]

Goes without saying. I'm only out to one male friend and that was because his girlfriend got it out of me. Not that he was surprised. The very first person I came out to was a girl.

[MssHyde]

for me its easiest to talk to like minded or women, but I would way more apt to share with a woman.
the other thing is I tend to crave friendship with women

[PretzelGirl]

I haven't seen a difference in acceptance between women and men. Maybe it is a fluke or maybe not. But I do find I am more hesitant when I am about to tell a guy. Possibly it is bad preconceptions as we expect to have more of an issue with men?

[Nikki A.]

I agree, women seem to be more understanding about it, unless you're trying to be in a relationship with them. Then it's a special girl who accepts it. Also women seem to ask more questions.

[Barbra P]

I dress on average one day a week, this summer being an exception because the grandkids were here full time. I’ve chatted with a number of the women in the neighborhood but only with a couple of the men. The women don’t seem to have a problem with Barbra, and as Barbra I have been asked to go on dog walks around the block by several of the women. As Barbra I did walk our dogs with one man, but that was more by accident than by design.

I dress more during the day, and almost entirely on week days and there are more women around but I have noticed that the men who are around tend to ignore me. That’s all right with me I’m more comfortable in the company of women and girl talk. Hmmm? Maybe it’s me, maybe I tend to avoid the men while seeking out the company of the women. I do think it is easier to express to a woman why you want to emulate a woman or even be a woman, than it is to explain the same concept to another man. I think most women are happy being women and the vast majority of men are happy being men so men just don’t understand why we would want to be women, but women get it.

[Kate Simmons]

I would say that is probably true for the most part. Women care about who we are as a person. Men normally are only concerned with our plumbing. :)

[Raychel]

Absolutely, No doubt about it, Definitely easier coming out to GG's then guys.
I feel that women are a lot more accepting.

Not to mention I just feel more comfortable talking about certain things with women.
Some things you just cant talk to guys about.....

[Rachel Morley]

I agree too. I feel more comfortable talking about my CDing to GGs rather than any non TG guy. In fact, other than CDers, I have never spoken about it to any guy, but that is not the case with GGs. I've talked to several.

[Sister Rachel]

Certainly in my case .. first people it crossed my mind to come out to (after my wife) were females, except for one m-f transgendered friend. A couple of good long-standing male friends are in the know too now, but it's not something I really want to discuss with them, whereas with my GG friends, I'm hoping for some real in-depth conversations in coming months.

[Tracii G]

I think women are more likely to accept you.Guys can surprise you sometimes.

[bridget thronton]

I have not be able to come out to any males besides my son and son in law. I have come out to my wife, daughter, and a few close female friends. Strangers are easiest (meaning folks who seem me when I am out and about)

[AllieSF]

I am already out to all the strangers I meet every time I go out, and I agree that I think that I get equal acceptance by both males and females. However, in coming out to someone who only knows me in my male mode, which I have not done, I would guess that women would probably be the more accepting or tolerating.

[Ressie]

I've never come out to any guys. There's more fear involved in this area, at least from my view. Fear that the guy will think you're gay and is hitting on you... fear that the guy will make fun of you.... fear that the guy will hit you... How about telling a small group of guys all at once? Not me!

[DebbieL]

Yes, I've found that it is more difficult for me to come out to other men. As a transsexual who is transitioning, I've had quite a bit more practice in sharing with men that ever before. I have found that men who are very conservative, especially those who get most of their news from Fox News, are the least accepting.

I think that one of the reasons women are more accepting, especially older women, is that women have a much broader latitude in dress and roles. Women who seek careers in science, technology, and business are especially understanding. Part of this may be because they have had to often take a more masculine role as they pursue such careers. Women often like to wear pants, flats, loose fitting shirts or blouses, and don't necessarily want to "show their stuff", especially in classes or work environments where they are surrounded by other men, many of whom have little or no fashion sense.

Men on the other hand, are conditioned from a very young age, that there are many things that men can't or shouldn't do. Many of them are almost unnatural. Much of these behaviors are focused at preparing young men for military service. As a result, they are told about hundreds of don'ts. Things like:

- Men don't cry
- You gotta fight to be a man
- You gotta take be a man and take responsibility.
- You gotta pay your own way because you're a man.
- You gotta provide for your family - it's your duty as a husband and father.
- Real men don't eat quiche (Title of an excellent book on male gender conformity).

There are also some negative messages men are taught.
- a REAL MAN can should DRINK others under the table.
- a REAL MAN drinks a "Man's drink" like beer or whisky - straight.
- a REAL MAN wants to F*ck every attractive woman he sees (notice it's not "Make Love", "Seduce", or "Give Pleasure".
- a REAL MAN is well hung
- A REAL MAN likes team sports like Football, Basketball, and Hockey.
- A REAL MAN dresses just like the rest of the guys.

And there are many things men DON'T do.

- A REAL MAN would never wear a frilly shirt
- A REAL MAN wears longer shorts - doesn't show his thighs.
- A REAL MAN would never carry a purse
- A REAL MAN would never wear a dress.

Further reinforcing this sexist gender conformity is the assumption that men who are effeminate, homosexual, transgendered, or have health restrictions - are simply draft dodgers bucking for a 4F classification. Even though the draft ended in 1975, the mentality still prevails. This is especially a common sentiment among those who actually WERE drafted, or served in wars such as Korea, Vietnam, or even the Gulf wars.

Many gym teachers understood that their primary function was to prepare young men for military service, reducing the training time needed to take a new recruit from his first day of boot camp to becoming a soldier in the field. The President's Counsel on Physical Fitness instituted by JFK back in 1961-2 had this as an explicit objective. Even though the draft is gone, most gym classes are still conducted in a very military fashion.

From grade school on, those who are labeled as "Sissy" usually become targets for those who have become bullies. Often, even after being violently and viciously attacked by multiple boys, even with bruises and cuts on his body, the teachers, especially athletic teachers will simply say "Boys will be Boys".

Often, by middle school, violent confrontations between boys are even encouraged. Those who do not fully participate in team sports are often physically attacked by their own teammates. Ultimately, for most boys, there is that final point where even their teacher is telling them that they have to fight, and win, if they want their own beatings to stop.

There is also the whole issue of homophobia. Even when a transsexual is sexually attracted to women, many men will be angered and upset to find that they have been sexually attracted to, fantasizing about, and lusting after, not the beautiful woman they thought they were viewing, but a person who had been born a man and still had some "male bits" left. There are also those who got the unpleasant shock of propositioning a TS who thought the customer knew what he was getting, and were abusive when the propositioner rejected them after finding out what was between her legs.

Will all of this in the background, it's not terribly surprising that we find it difficult as people brought up to be boys, often against our own will, to share our nature as being transgendered, regardless of what the level. Even cross-dressers find that they are unwilling to have their secret known by other men in their own community. For some, there is the fear of loss of job, family, children, standing in community, and religious institution.

Still, I have found, as a transsexual now in transition, that far more men are supportive than I ever would have expected. I'm not surprised that many of those who are charged with addressing the issue in the corporate environment are women or post-transition transsexuals.

[LasVegasXD]

When my crossdressing was being developed in my marriage, I was basically out to all her friends, and I imagine a few they in turn told. This of course meant more than a few men (in truth many were boys in the strictest sense of the word). Their ages were in the teens/early 20's in Vegas in the late 00s/10s (millenials). About half the men saw me dressed and had no issues with it whatsoever. They would enjoy it in a non pervy way, and I would feel comfortable being Jenny around them. Some were hostile and felt very uncomfortable about it. I learned to not do it around them just because of the hassle. One particular was a reddest of redneck (extreme pro gun, extreme pro god, and extremely racist yeah!), and oddly he was my ex wife's best friend. There was only one who made a pass, and that was very very uncomfortable. Doubly so since he did it to me in boy mode.

The ladies on the other hand were almost to a T accepting, supportive, and encouraging. A couple liked to shop with me, which I'm always grateful for a female escort on those outings, pun not intended.

[MissTee]

This will likely show how shallow people in my part of the world can be: I ran this one past the wife. She said it's easier with GG's because they get wanting to dress up and look good, go shopping, etc. Guys on the other hand think it's gay, and since "it" is gay you must be, too. Guys are inclined to be quite homophobic, and even if they are not many pretend in order to protect the man card. Thus, since "it" is gay and consequently you must be, then men must rebuke you. Women, on the other hand, think differently. Having a gay friend is a status symbol.

So, there you have it :brolleyes::brolleyes::brolleyes:

[Cynthia Anne]

Always seem that way to me! 'Course I'm out to everyone nowadays! Just don't care anymore!

[Beverley Sims]

I find it is easier to associate with women, I would not come out to any male friends.

[heathr1]

Thank you. It seems I am not alone.

[audreyinalbany]

sure seem to me to be easier to come out to women; I suspect that for many men, even if they are okay with it, they dont want to admit it for fear they'll be seen as 'gay' or somehow less masculine.