Which parent influenced you the most....

[heathr1]

In my line of work this question arises in training from time to time.

Maybe most crossdressers had moms as the most influential one.

Do you feel your mom influenced you more than your dad when growing up?

For me, it is 50 mom/50 dad, although mom was the disciplinarian and at home more.

[Raychel]

Definitely more Mom, She was my best friend.
Dad worked several jobs to support the family, he was not around much for the kids.
and it was his job to be the heavy hand when the kids did not do what Mom said.
So he wasn't the best liked. :sad:

[Jocelyn Quivers]

Both influenced me 50/50. My mom was the disciplinarian more so being that she was a public school teacher in the inner city, so being very strict was basically second nature to her. My dad was more of the back bone to my mom's discipline ex. disobeying mom rules or being disrespectful could always be easily stopped just with the mention of getting my dad involved. My dad in many ways is where more of my compassion, understanding, forgiveness, tolerance, came from. As for dressing influences my moms only influence was she worked in the era where GG's always wore hose, be it work, church, formal events etc. which greatly influenced me in that era. Oh and I got some but not all of her good looks!:D

[Kate Simmons]

It was neither. My Grandmother was my hero(ine). I patterned my femme self after her.:battingeyelashes::)

[Veronica27]

Mom stayed home, raised the kids and looked after the home, which was the norm back in the 1940's when I was growing up. I learned a great deal from her about responsibility, the importance of learning, the need for a good sense of humour and she also taught me how to play the piano and appreciate music. She was also the disciplinarian of the family and meted out any necessary punishment. Dad worked long hours, six days a week, on his feet all day and was usually exhausted when he got home and spent much of that time sleeping. When he wasn't napping he talked about sports, trains, cars, and anything else that might interest us kids. I also learned a great deal from him about those topics as well as how to handle most household tools and do the simpler repairs. I don't think that my situation had much impact if any upon my becoming a crossdresser.

Veronica

[Lynn Marie]

Neither! If it hadn't been fo my grandmother, I'd undoubtedly be dead or in prison at this point.

[NicoleScott]

My mom had the lipstick but little else I liked. My dad punished me for playing with lipstick which drove me deep into the closet. My sister had the really good stuff.
Mom-good influence
Dad-bad influence
Sis-great influence

[Beverley Sims]

Mother's and Grandmother's influence here.

[Jennifer in CO]

the answer from here would depend on the season of life. Real young - (6-8) when Mom didn't get the laundry done or it was too cold outside and I slept in flannel gowns. Young (10-11)? Aunt that created/nurtured Jennifer. 14-15 would be grand parents who supported me during that summer. Mom - when I was 16-18 with her silent help of her version of "DADT" but if I ever want to talk I'm here...and while I'm at it here's a pair of panties. Early 20's my new wife who really liked her new husband horny and if wearing girls clothes made him horny then he would be kept in them as much as possible. As least up till she pushed me to transisition...

Lots of Influence.

[LilSissyStevie]

I like to think that I've mostly overcome the influence that my parents had on me. I like to think that. I really do. :straightface:

[Tracii G]

50/50 here my work ethic and strength I got from my Dad my sense of humor from my Mom.
My Dad was hard on me but I deserved it I was a bad kid.My Mom was stern too and I didn't try to jerk her chain too much but she had a warm loving side and always forgave me no matter how bad I was.I'm sure she would have accepted my girl side.

[Robin777]

My mother influenced me the most. My dad was the disciplinarian. When he came home and found out you did something wrong and he was in a bad mood, lookout!

That's all I am going to say about that. I couldn't tell you if that influenced my becoming a crossdresser. I doubt it though. As I think back on my childhood I think it was other things.

[bridget thronton]

I was very close to my mom, not so close to my dad (a doctor who worked very long hours)

[I Am Paula]

My mom soooo much. She was the ultimate lady. She taught me to always have fresh flowers on the table. Only to use cloth napkins, how to set a table, make a seating plan, design and execute a perfect menu. She was the epitomy of class, and poise, and knew, and taught me the social graces.
Her fundraising work sent her to a cocktail party or a dinner every night, where she got to wear fabulous gowns, which would later be auctioned. I don't think I ever saw her in a tiara, but if any woman could pull it off, it would be her.
My Mom is battling brain cancer now, and is housebound. One of her nurses asked her if there was anything on her bucket list she didn't get to do, and she simply replied 'No, I did it all.'

[PretzelGirl]

It is no contest. Really, this isn't a contest. They both taught me a lot and did a lot to shape me. I can't even fathom trying to compare their contributions to who I have become.

[Trisha65]

Although both parents were extremely supportive in my childhood and decision to transform, I would have to say my mom as she took the time to show me many of the girl things such as picking out clothes, makeup, hair you name it. All in all I have to thank both my parents and all my sisters. They went beyond call to help me succeed in my goal.

[Tina B.]

I had the ideal upbringing of the fifty's. A stay at home mom, and a dad that worked a good job and provided well for us. Mom was the fun one, Dad was the strict one, Mom was my buddy and protector, while Dad demanded respect and believed in everyone carrying there share of the load.
I felt closes to mom, but when I grew up, and dad had passed, I was with a large group of relatives, and was surprised when everyone told me how much I'm like him, not just looks, but mannerisms, and attitudes.
Sometimes you should let someone else figure out the answer to that question, your to close to it to be objective.

[Stephanie47]

Kind of an open ended question-Which parent influenced you the most?

Well, in a negative way, my mother influenced me the most. She influenced me to not be like her with her dislikes and bias beliefs. She was a back stabbing bitch. There was more than one or two occasions when she told my dad falsehoods with the intentions I would get some serious discipline. If there was a Child Protective Service back then, she would have been a candidate for a referral.

I suspect she really disliked me because I had an older brother, and, I was suppose to be a girl. Her actions truly showed who the favorite son was, and, it was not me. I guess my father influenced me as to what kind of father I should be. My mother showed me what kind of parent NOT to be.

[TheMissus]

So most here had stronger female influence in their lives...hmmm.

[Tina_gm]

My father x100

[Rogina B]

My very openminded,accepting,mother that encouraged me to explore my great expanse of interests.Once,in my late teens,a girlfriend made the "searching" type comment to my Mom.."He sure enjoys wearing girl's clothes"..And my mother answered" He always has".. Her openminded approach has been a huge influence on me.

[heatherdress]

Father - maybe 90% - very positively - always set good example - good hearted, treated everyone well, worked hard, generous - always encouraged me - open minded - intelligent

Mother - maybe 10% - mixed impact - had favorite child and it was not me

[Frédérique]

Which parent influenced you the most....

Both in equal measures, I think. My mother taught me to respect other people’s feelings. My father taught me all about bigotry and prejudice, just by being in his general vicinity. My mother placated my inherent shyness, to a certain degree, while my father drew me OUT on occasion. Neither parent pushed me one way or the other, in terms of gender, or a path through life, but they had me when they were old (SURPRISE!). They were simply too tired to be very hands-on…

I can thank my father for my highly-sexed nature. I can thank my mother for resistance to that very same personality trait. My father is responsible for my love of nature. My mother taught me how to be frugal. When my mother died I hung around and took care of my father. Being the only boy in our branch of the family tree, I would say that my father and I were very close, but that would’ve never been expressed – it just WAS. I am the embodiment of my father and mother, and I had a happy childhood growing up in their mutual presence…

PS – Thanks to my father, I don’t believe that things have meanings. Thanks, DAD! :clap:

[SophieKitty]

As far as CDing goes, NONE influenced me.

As far as a human being both equally influenced me in behaviour

[Sabrina133]

My father for the first career choice i made and for developing me into the strong resolute person i've become. My mother for being the understanding, loving and accepting person that she is. I am a combination of both.

[erickka]

It was mostly mom and grandma....dad was never around much when I was a young'un.

[noeleena]

Hi,

Only had a Mom for 24 years, for a few years her Mom & Dad, were with us, , males did not influance me in any way, only from a work point of view i was trained by them yet there was nothing i had at all in common with them.

...noeleena...

[ArleneRaquel]

My mother was the biggest influence if for no other reasn that I spent more time with her than with my father. My love for lingerie came from her as did my adoration for cat's eye female eyewear. As I have stated when I was first fited for (male) eyewear, circa 1959, my mother was also fittedwith her first pair also. Her first pair where NOT just for reading but she went immediately to a full time eye glass wearer, and as her first pair she choose the cat's eye style which was still a popular style of frame back then. I was fitted with my first pair of female eyewear circa 1969 and I am sure that they were cat's eye, though I don't remember for sure. By the time I took part in my first Gay Pride Parade, circa 1974/5, I did have a pair of cat's eye and have chosen that style ever since (about 90%) when I purchased female frames,which has been 100% of the time since 2003.

My mother also gave me a great love of 1960's style lingerie, except for pantyhose, which was a late 1960's creation, which I prefer to stocking. She also had a great influence on my way of thing about currents events & politics. She was about 5"2" & under 100 lbs most of her life. My late wife, who also influenced me fashion wise was 5"1" & under 100lbs also. My mother was fitted for glasses, fulltime as I said at age 36, my wife who had worn glasses since age 10, was fitted for bifocals at age 36. My mother and I went to bifocals in our 40's & 50's respetively. My wife also had a "thing" for cat's eye style until she was about age 50 when she switched to a more conventional style that was not plastic, nor cat'es eye, but she always looked very chic & sexy.

I'm sorry if I went a little far a field from the topic and went off on a eyewear tangent. But my Mom was the greater influence. Btw during the last years of my mother life I took care of her and I did it enfemme. I was usually a blonde back then, in her pre-grey years she was abrunette. My wife was a brunette and an auburn haired lady during our marriage.

[Dianne S]

Both of my parents influenced me; I couldn't possibly sort out if one had more influence than the other.

As far as CDing goes, I don't think either parent influenced me. I came out to my mother ages ago, but she seems to have suppressed it and has never talked about it. My father is no longer alive and I never came out to him. While my father was a very kind, compassionate and tolerant person, he was somewhat old-fashioned and I think he would have been upset to know I'm a crossdresser, though I have no doubt he would have tried to be supportive.

[Tina_gm]

My late father has a far bigger influence on me. A true mans man but not in the physical realm. He was brave, and tough in spirit. He never made excuses, he made time. He worked so very hard so that we had good food on the table. He was a saint in every way possible, and even died as one. They broke the mold with him.

[shayleetv]

I can't say that one parent influenced me more than the other, nor can i say it was 50 - 50. They both had influence on me that made me who I am, some good and some not so good. The most important influences are: My integrity came from my dad; my love of spontaneity came form my mom. Those are the two things that sum up my life.

[heathr1]

Thank you everyone.

[audreyinalbany]

definitely Mom. She was the one that helped with homework and she and i used to do little home improvement projects together; Dad was distant and aloof, always more interested in other people than in his family. Found out later he was abusive to my half brother.
It was interesting because I'm not sure Mom was really fulfilled by being a woman. She was always crafty and handy but Sse was a product of her times (born in the '20's, matured in the 40's and 50's). She used to tell me that "I wish I'd been born a man so i could have been a carpenter." Maybe that's where I get this crazy admixture of the masculine and feminine.

[Celina]

Hard to say... Actually not possible... Both my parents influenced me one more than the other. Each of them with their own thing, which I took in and helped me become who I am today. None of them however has influenced me in the direction of REALLY liking womens clothing so much that I started wearing it. I do however remember even when I was a little kid I loved pantyhose and was allowed to run around the house wearing them.

[Jaymees22]

My mother probably influenced me the most until I was about 13, then my father realized I was there and started to influence me more. They both treated me well and I never was never hit. I was an only child and pretty quiet so I don't think I was a problem until my teenage years. Jaymee

[heathr1]

OP here. Both of mine influenced me well, but mom was the disciplinarian.

[sometimes_miss]

I'd have to say it was an even split, even despite my dad not being home a lot. He was a stand up guy; honest to a fault, always tried to do the right thing. Once I learned not to do bad stuff, the physical punishment thing wasn't a big deal; I just made sure I wasn't doing anything wrong, after all, his guidelines were crystal clear and straightforward. Dad worked like a dog to support the family, and, not just us. He helped everyone. I honor his memory by trying to be very much like him, other than beating the crap out of anyone who disobeys me. He was the kind of guy you wanted to have your back in any situation.
So here on the infinite internet, thanks for the good stuff, dad.
Mom, on the other hand, was, well, a handful. She seems like one of those who grew up as little girls being told she was a princess, and believed it. Then when she didn't get what she expected from the world, decided she'd get what she wanted no matter what she had to do. The lying and manipulations were rampant; looking back, there was an even better than 50-50 chance that at any given moment, she was lying through her teeth. And she was very, very good at it. Only as she got older did she start to slip up and forget previous lies. I can't say for sure how much she influenced my life by dressing me up as a girl when I was a toddler; I'm absolutely sure it was going on based on my dad's reaction when he found out, that will stick in my memory forever. Yet, the next few years of my childhood were completely normal boy stuff. But the fact that she made me think I was nuts for most of my life by making stuff up, and then denying it at a later date, seriously made a negative impact on me.

[Bianca Star]

My Grandmother raised me and taught me how to be a good man and a good person.

[Alice Torn]

Sadly, i was the unwanted baby of a toxic family. My parents had nothing in common, fought constantly. I never wanted to be the sicko meant alcoholic moron my dad was, and still is. My mom died last year. The tyrant lives on, and at 92, seem like he will never die. He has made my life a living hell. It's all about him, and his interesst. My interests meant nothing. H never went o one of my high school baseball games, even though i sat on the bench most all the games. He tried to get an uncle to adapt me away. Yet, i quit my business, moved 2000 miles, to help him, as i thought he would die soon, back in 2010. He is still at home, refuses to go to the nursing home, wants t his "pound of flesh". He told me as a kis, that he expected me to take care of him, when he is old. My parents did not want any of there kids to grow up, and get married. They wanted us to stay kids, and be with them!!! No one in my famuly grew up. My mom influenced me more, in learning, was smarter than my dad. My dad seemed to tell me to be a loner, like him, not like people, . But his influence was 90% negative, anti-social, morose, not learn anything new. Very toxic. No wonder my older brothers are Nazism and older 65 yr old sister, nerd dated nor wanted kids. A very extreme odd family, recipe for my suicide, which it nearly did, many times. So, THE NEGATIVE MAKE INFLUENCE FROM MY FATHER, and brothers, STRONGLY HELPED ME CHOOSE TO DRESS UP AS WOMEN. My MOM, NICE LEGS, AND OUTFITS, helped cause crosdressing.

[Amanda M]

For me, the major influence had to be my mother. I don't really remember much about my Dad - he died when I had just turned 9 - but what I do remember was a kindly gentleman in the best sense of the word. My mother was left poor, with a very insecure handful of a son. I was constantly afraid of being abandoned by her too, as I saw it.

She was not faultless. Terrible at retaining friendships and good at cutting herself off from people who cared about. That, however, was just her nature, and, I think her upbringing.

I, therefore, had little or no male influence a I grew up, and it was many, many years before I realized that I did not need to be needy and clingy, some thing that mife wife found very corrosive. I'm still working at it!

For Mum though, whatever her faults, she taught me respect (where it was earned) and the worth of basically being a decent human. For that, I am still grateful.

[CynthiaD]

I've tried to distance myself from both my parents. My father was a traveling salesman and was never home. My mother was under a lot of stress and handled it poorly. She had a terrible temper and was mad about something almost all the time. From time to time I catch myself imitating their bad habits, though. I guess the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.

[Laura28]

Since i never new my Dad it would have to be my mother most of all, also my sister was an influance in my life.

[nethiker55]

For me probably mom as I spent much more time with mom than dad, hardly saw him until I was 13. But my sisters were the most influential

[rhonda]

Mom she didn't belive in it but she did everything to help

[donnatracey]

Definitely my mom! Access to her closet and makeup, esp her red lipstick, was my first step/attempt at dressing. Had a few close calls but don't think she ever knew....

[ArleneRaquel]

My mother, especially after I became fascinated by her lingerie wardrobe and also when we were fitted your fulltime eyewear at the sametime(1959) and she choose cat's eye style frames. Ever since then I had adored that style in a female frame, at about the sametime an aunt and and older female cousin were also fitted for glasses, fulltime, and they both picked cat's eye styleI have been wearing that stlye for years

[Angel_Star]

I grew up with my dad, so he had most influence I guess.

[Jodie_Lynn]

In my case, it would depend on if you are looking for a positive or negative influence.

My mother, rest her damaged soul, was a binge alcoholic and spent about three months of every year either drunk or drying out. She was a very bitter and angry person.

My father, rest his soul, tried to pick up the slack and be both mother and father, with varying degrees of success.

My sister, 16 years older than myself, was my salvation because I spent almost all my summers and school breaks with her, her husband and her three daughters.