Another story of acceptance.

[Kimberlyfaye]

Can we be too confident? Too out there? Can we look at a situation and go into it with overflowing confidence?

I have had another outing today, in drab, and I have come out again! A short time ago I posted here about my experience of coming out while getting new glasses. Well today I went around town and asked a few of the lovely girls at the makeup counters about a foundation to use. Every conversation started with "This is probably a strange request, but I'm slightyly bi-gendered and I sometimes dress up as a girl...." Anyway I showed them all the picture of me dressed. The responses were varied. One said, "Oh ok. You look very passable." And then she proceeded to help me with my problem. Another said "Ok well I have some trans friends and I've seen drag queens and they tend to do this...." But my personal favourite, and a young lady I will speak to again if I see her to thank, said "That sounds fun. Is that really you! You look so good. Wow."
Anyway they all helped me without hesitation and they were all very nice. Some gave me samples to try and tips for using the makeup. The last one, she even sat me in the chair and put some on me to see if it solved my problem. Then gave me a sample to try at home.

But as I mentioned above, do any of you think I am becoming too confident? Now I'm just asking SA's outright and not caring. I'm feminine and masculine and I like myself that way!

Hope this inspires some of you like it did last time. The acceptance is out there, you just have to be brave and grab it!
Xx

[Lorileah]

I don't think you are too confident, you are getting comfortable with yourself.

[Annaliese]

Not at all you are just being your self

[tiffanyjo89]

What you are doing might be interpreted as being "bold," not overconfident.

I mean, sure, what we do is not "normal" but, then again, normal is relative. I'm sure that many SA's have seen guys shopping for girly items for themselves, and even more have probably seen guys shopping for girly items "for someone else" (whether they are really getting that item for a SO/female relative/friend, or themselves is their business once they leave the store).

From what I gather, you didn't do anything that a woman wouldn't do. You went in, explained that you were looking for and (from what I can tell) treated the SA's with respect. It just so happens that you were presenting as a guy at the time. I think you presenting as a guy actually was better, so they could see a full "before" shot with you providing an after shot so they know what type of look you go for. The biggest thing, they could see what you start out with so they know what you really need, not what "girl you" looks like she needs.

[Chickhe]

Not at all. The only thing I object to is starting out by saying...'this is a strange request...'. I think you are doing fine getting over your self confidence issues by being open about it, but what and how you say things also matters. The people you are taking to have seen it before, so maybe it is an 'unusual request' or 'not the most common request'. But, it would be better to start positive or neutral. ...'I'm here to brighten up your day!...have you had any other TG ask you for help today?!' or just 'Hi, I'm looking for foundation to cover my beard'. The way I approach situations like this is to feel confident, as if it is a common request...people say act like you own the place. You want to approach it like you were buying a power tool at home depot...you belong and they are there to sell to you. Getting out and asking for help is one of the best ways to do it in my opinion (there are many benefits beyond just looking good).

[kimdl93]

There's no reason not to be confident in speaking with SAs. Its their business to help, that's how they get paid. And there's no cost to them in being courteous and helpful.

I think its wonderful that you're able to speak with SAs without embarrassment and get the services you're seeking. However, acceptance by sale peopl is a rather meager indicator of "acceptance". Its rather meaningless in comparison to the relationships that count - SO, family, friends, co-workers. The reaction and the consequences of coming out to people with some stake in your life are infinitely more significant.

[Jodi]

Bold or overconfident? No. I consider it to be direct and honest. This is the way we should function daily in all of our dealings.

Jodi

[xdressed]

Unless you're going into dark alley's at night on your own or something like that then it's pretty hard to be 'overconfident'., You probably don't even need to mention being a bit bi-gender or show pictures every time ^_^

I agree with Chickhe though that it's better to start off in a more positive or neutral way

[Kelly DeWinter]

Kimberly ,


blah blah lah BLAH .... you forgot the important part, what is THE color for Lipstick for next year ! :daydreaming:

[Beverley Sims]

You are doing well and if you maintain the same approach each time you will gain real confidence and become less self conscious.

[stephyX]

making more progress than me,il be dragging my gf along with me to help work out makeup but good to see your confidence is growing :)