What she said shocked me

[Sarah Beth]

I have been trying to decide about this since it happened yesterday and I am still not sure what to think. I have started to post this several times then deleted it because I'm not sure how comfortable I am with it.

I ran into someone I hadn’t seen since our sophomore year in high school. I didn’t recognize her at first but she knew me. We stood there in the parking lot chatting about where we had been and family and that sort thing for a few minutes. She told me she had thought about me on occasion over the years because she always remembered how nice I had been to her and her friends in school. We were all about the same age and grew up in the same neighborhood.

She told me how she and her three close friends had really liked how easy I was to talk to, how I could keep a confidence and not blab their secrets. They liked how sensitive and in tune I was with their feelings and needs. She then said that they had considered me to be “one of the girls”. (A little back ground here. Up until my junior year in high school I was pretty shy and nerdy and got picked on a lot. I cross dressed secretly from 13 until I was 16. I was a year ahead in school so was younger than everyone in my class. I wasn’t supposed to get into fights or I would be in big trouble at home. During my junior year I rebelled and sort of blew up and did a lot of things that were wild and dangerous.) She was surprised that I was married, that I had kids because I never dated during the time she knew me and she didn’t think I liked girls in that way because I never dated. (I didn't really date until I was a senior). She went to say something to the effect that I had turned out to be different than she had expected, that when she heard someone from home who graduated about the same time I did had a sex change but that she hadn’t heard the name she had wondered if it was me.

I was shocked that she would be so bold as to say this to me. We hadn't seen each other in over 40 years. What could have known then, or what did she know now. I was wearing panties and bar under my drab but there wasn't anything showing.

I am at a loss here I have know idea what to think about what she told me. I remeber at the time a couple of years ago when it was going around about the person who had the sex change that someone made some comment to me about her (although they called her him) being close to me or words to that affect. Although she wasn't anyone I ever hung out with at all.

Was I giving off some sort of vibe because I was spending a lot of time cross dressed? Do we as cross dressers, have so aura about us that certain others can pick up on? Now I am thinking that maybe there is a reason some people have treated me the way they have over the years that they are picking up on something.

[kimdl93]

well, I can relate to parts of your experience. I do think that people like us react and respond differently than traditional males at any age. And a lot of us will go to rather great extremes to hide who we are.

[DonnaT]

She told me how she and her three close friends had really liked how easy I was to talk to, how I could keep a confidence and not blab their secrets. They liked how sensitive and in tune I was with their feelings and needs. She then said that they had considered me to be “one of the girls”.
Kids get vibes from other kids all the time, and come to conclusions without really getting to know someone, and even when they think they know someone, questions don't get asked, thus conclusions can still be wrong.

From the above quote, even though you may not have acted girly, or gay, the fact that you didn't date and (apparently) didn't hang with the guys, led them to believe you were different from other guys, and you became like a girl friend.

I doubt they had any idea of your secret.

[Tracii G]

She just knew you were a sweet ,kind and gentle person.
Does she know you CD probably not.

[Stephanie47]

I think she able to make the remark because she obviously knew you did not have a sex change operation. Then, I think you need to think back to high school and remember what kind of guys there were. Too many guys were only interested in getting into a girl's panties, treat her like a possession, told blatant wishful thinking lies, etc. You? You displayed attributes that apparently were contrary to the run of the mill guy. Frankly, you sound as if you were years ahead of your time/age. I know lots of guys who are not CDers who are like you. I don't think you were trying to hide your CDing.

[Jodie_Lynn]

Instead of shocked, perhaps you should be grateful.


she and her three close friends had really liked how easy I was to talk to, how I could keep a confidence and not blab their secrets. They liked how sensitive and in tune I was with their feelings and needs. She then said that they had considered me to be “one of the girls”.

The parts I underlined are all positive traits that many men seem to lack, especially hormone driven high-schoolers. Perhaps she and her friends added 1 + 1 and came to an erroneous conclusion regarding your sexuality. (oh he must be gay! )

Another reason to be grateful: she said she often thought of you over the years. Who wouldn't like being remembered after so much time?

I think that we (as cross-dressers in particular, but also applies to all brothers and sisters of the LBGT rainbow), tend to over analyze what others think and do. It is a mild form of paranoia that we feel everyone is talking/staring/knows about us. 90% of the time, it isn't true.

[Beverley Sims]

You were the nerdy friendly guy that could relate to girls.
You were always their friend.
Not some guy that was likely to bonk them.
You were fondly remembered and that is something that you should treasure.
How many potential bonkers do girls remember from their school days.
Deep personal details were passed between both of you.
You have been paid a tribute.
Keep smiling. :)