Want help passing

[Lyla]

Hi girls, I want to be able to pass. Is there any tips or tricks that would help me be passable? I'm not looking to be a model just your average mid thirties woman look. Is there any girls on here that pass? I would like to maybe be mentored by them if there okay with it.

Thanks
Lyla

[Fortuneta]

Hello Lyla...
CONFIDENCE! I have found if you dress your age and correctly for the place you are at...no-one pays attention to you. Good example is heels and skirts. I love both and take the time to look at anyone dressed as such. In a mall/ballgame/park etc is wrong and will attract onlookers. Don't dress to be stared at.
Take care, Fortuneta

[BethCD]

Hi Lyla, welcome to the forum. I'm not sure how far along you are, but you might find these sites helpful:
http://trepanrr.tripod.com/color_analysis_training_online.htm
http://www.videojug.com/tag/make-up

You'll find this to be a great forum. We all help each other
Beth

[Lyla]

Thanks for the sites Beth, will try and use those to my full advantage.

Thanks for the advice Fortuneta, I love heels and skirts too.

[Kate Simmons]

Sounds like good advice so far. As Fortuneta said though, "passing" is mostly a state of mind. We have to convince ourselves before trying to convince others if that's indeed what you want to do. I prefer simply having fun with it myself. :battingeyelashes::)

[Kelly DeWinter]

Most passable ?that would have to be enoyreve .

[Lori B]

@Kelly :doh::heehee:

[Angela Campbell]

"passing" is relative. No one can know for sure what others are thinking and seeing and how they interpret it. How well you can be perceived as a female is going to depend on what you look like to start with, and how much time, effort, and money you are willing to spend on it. You didn't post a pic so no one can tell what you have to work with.

[Jorja]

Well, you go get into your car and get out on the road. You look to make sure no cars are coming and move out into the oncoming lane. Press the accelerator peddle until you have picked up enough speed to pass. Look over your shoulder to make sure it is safe to pull back into the lane. And there you have it. You have passed.

Honestly, don't worry so much about passing. Just be your wonderful self, wear your choice of clothing, and enjoy it.

[JamieQ]

The best advice about "passing" that I can give is quite simple: Stop worrying about it so much.

Dress age appropriate/situation appropriate, go about your business as usual, do NOT avoid people, look at them or look them in the eye and smile, if greeted simply say "hi" or something back, do not rush what you are doing. I do not think I "pass" very well but vast majority acts as if they have no idea. I think I "blend" really good though. Anything to add Tracii?

[Beverley Sims]

Lyla,
Welcome to the forum, you need to practice your makeup and presentation skills, as you become more proficient in deportment and voice training you will then be able to concentrate on any weaker points in your presentation.
This does not happen over night.
It does take months.
Practice a little and then ask a specific question on your weaknesses, when you get answers to that proceed on to your next goal.

[AmyGaleRT]

Who is the most passable girl here? If you don't want to single any one out message me. I want to learn from the best.

Lyla, to a certain extent, you'll have to judge for yourself. The pictures people post in the Picture and Video Gallery topic run the gamut. At the high end, there are ladies on here that not only look like GGs, but look like absolute bombshells.

I find I don't worry so much about "passing" anymore. As others have said, it's all about confidence. Be confident in yourself and confident in your presentation, and it will go a long way towards convincing others, or at least not drawing their attention. You may disagree with the views of the Ferengi, but their 267th Rule of Acquisition is very much the case: "If you believe it, they believe it." :)

- Amy

[Marcelle]

Hi Lyla,

I really don't have much to offer here as I am just starting to dabble in going out public en femme. Had a bit of a setback on one occasion but I do believe it was a confidence/nervousness issue. I have no doubt I don't pass and blending (meh, work in progress) but I believe that confidence will help, if you look like you belong then people will just leave you alone. Will you get stares, rude comments . . . probably. But people are who they are and if you just ignore the comments, they will probably move on in their pathetic miserable existence to some other distraction. Now, if I could only follow my own advice :)


You may disagree with the views of the Ferengi, but their 267th Rule of Acquisition is very much the case: "If you believe it, they believe it." :)


Amy, I never realized you were a Treki.

Hugs

Isha

[thechic]

Hi there I agree with Fortuneta CONFIDENCE! Is the key and dress appropriately for age and situation, and make certain you move and talk like a woman. Movement is so important.
Good Luck.

[linda allen]

You want to pass? Take photos and videos of yourself and then examine them with a critical eye. youtube.com has a lot of tips on makeup, hair styles, and even crossdressing.

Some of us can pass at twenty feet, some at ten if we keep moving, and some will be identified as crossdressers at one hundred feet. If you're 6'6" tall and 280 lb, you will be in the last group.

[audreyinalbany]

and yo don't have to be a 'bombshell' to pass: just be an everyday gorgeous gal

[Candice Mae]

Going from head to toe;

Wig - get a wig that looks realistic on you and as hair in general. Take time to make sure it is properly maintained and styled, so it doesn't look like you have a a disaster on your head.

Make up - simple every day look; go light on the eyes, blush, and lipstick or lipgloss.

Voice - practice a feminine voice and vocabulary, mostly don't swear or use slang.

Shoulders - if you have a muscular build wear 3/4 or longer sleeved shirts that are a little baggy on the arms. Maybe wear a light jacket, Avoid tank tops.

Breasts - wear a modest set of forms, you don't need double d's to pass. Pick a size that is proportional to your frame. Try a b or a c cup. If you can create cleavage, wear a lower cut top. Just low enough to show a little cleavage, no need to be flashing everyone. Wear your most comfortable bra, the last thing you need to be is fighting with an uncomfortable bra.

Waist - use shape wear as needed to enhance your figure,

Hips - use shape wear as needed to enhance you figure.

Legs - if you are gonna wear a skirt, shave your legs a week in advance and moisturize often. Wear a skirt that is atleast a couple inches above your knee or longer.

Shoes - wear a low heel or flats don't go over board.

Walking - walk femininely and use softer gentler movements.

As other said confidence and attitude as key. Believe in who you are and not what others think. If you look insecure of worried you will only bring soon on wanted attention.

Also dress for the occasion, and your age. Don't dress sexy dress to blend.

[Tracii G]

Welcome Lyla nice to have you here.
Candice Mae's post pretty much sums it up for the first timers.
Passing is being able to fit right in wherever you are.Confidence is the main thing.
We have no pics of you to make the assumption if you pass or not.Tell us more about your self and how far along on your gender quest you are.
Best looking? There are soo many here that are truly gorgeous Monika get my vote.


The best advice about "passing" that I can give is quite simple: Stop worrying about it so much.

Dress age appropriate/situation appropriate, go about your business as usual, do NOT avoid people, look at them or look them in the eye and smile, if greeted simply say "hi" or something back, do not rush what you are doing. I do not think I "pass" very well but vast majority acts as if they have no idea. I think I "blend" really good though. Anything to add Tracii?


Amanda you are correct. I noticed on our day out you did better at blending than I did. You never got called Sir one time and I did lol.
I think people in general see a person in female clothing they figure its a female.Most don't care either way.

[Lorileah]

what is this pass for which you speak? Don't put too much work into it, you will be tagged. Just be you, don't overdo. Since the dawn of time on this forum people have asked this question. It has never been answered. All you can do is be the best you can be. Most of Candice's answers are helpful. THe voice? You will need a lot of time and work on that and then it won't pass usually. The walk? Women all walk differently. Just yesterday I followed a woman into Qdoba who walked like she was a linebacker. What outs you the quickest? Looking like a deer in the headlights. Head up, chest out, walk with a purpose and act like you own it

[Chari]

First - Welcome here to this very friendly forum! Also great advice from previous posts! You should ALWAYS be confident and comfortable in what you are wearing, no matter where you are on the gender scale. "Passing" does take a lot of time and practice in all areas - makeup, clothing, hair style, actions, and you may "pass" for most, but there is no guarantee everyone will be convinced you are a GG. If you need help building a wardrobe, doing makeup, etc, perhaps you have an accepting GG friend who would be willing to "teach" you. Consider doing a "dress rehearsal", look in the mirror, and if you enjoy what you see - go for it! It is always the first step that begins your journey.

[jaimiesky]

This is a great post Candice. I am new to this site, but not new to being feminine. I have to admit though, there is a certain amount of anxiety when I step out the door into the world. I wonder if people notice my anxiety and this draws unwanted attention.
Thanks Jai

[jaimiesky]

Thank you Jorja. I will enjoy.

[Suzanne F]

I was so worried about this in the beginning. Like others have said you just have to own it. The people that do notice me look to see if I am ashamed I think. I am not! I am being the most authentic me I have ever been and I think people respect that. I want them to see a confident happy person. Granted that feeling can slip away but I recover more quickly now. For instance last weekend in Vegas I was in Victorias Secret store with my wife while dessed. My wife went to the dressing room and I was wondering around a crowded store. Some people were noticing me and I felt a little self conscious. However when my wife came out I took the bra and panty set from her and got right in line. I paid and made small talk with the young beautiful girl at the counter. She treated me line any other woman. I had recovered nicely and went about my day! We can do it!
Hugs
Suzanne