Allesandra Rhodes
09-28-2013, 04:52 PM
Good evening ladies,
I realized that I did not do much of an introduction so you know very little about me. I'm in my late 30s and I'm living with fiancé. We have been through a lot together but worked hard to get a place to ourselves on a little land. I love her more than she knows.
Since a very young age until about 9 years ago, I had been closeted. Up until then I lived the manly life doing manly things but never really living as a whole person. Then when I came out for the first time, everything started changing and I swore I wouldn't/couldn't go back. I spent a lot of time figuring out who I was inside and letting her out slowly but surely. She has prospered into a lovely flower now.
As time goes by, your perceptions change and so does your attitude. The world changed around me. But I managed to hang on just long enough to see the light. I'm just glad I did before giving up. I had plenty of turmoil and stress over my internal battle as well as regular life. I've tried the purging, the pink fog thingy, and then settled on finding out what I really want to be and loving it for all that it is. Many of my friends have moved on without me, living their lives as they were. Friends I made on the internet have also disappeared. Some passed on.. bless their souls. The names matter not now, however their spirits touched me. I won't forget them or the honor of knowing any of their secrets.
I've gone out dressed a handful of times and enjoyed them. Got that out of my system so to speak and would do it again if/when the time comes. For those who have not had a ladies night out, I recommend removing the stick from your butt and get out there, it's an amazing feeling. I love shock value but I also like to blend in. We really never heard any bad mouthing when I was 'out'. Although I wasn't so good on my voice back then, I just made sure I didn't talk a lot.:heehee:
That time passed on to other things. Relocating, starting over. Defining my goals and so on. I know what I want and what to avoid. I'm really harmless and don't mean to offend anyone. Sometimes I just get carried away trying to have fun, or because I'm upset at something else..
Dressing is just a form of expressing what's inside to me, I'm always me inside. I don't get dressed to feel better but I certainly feel better when I dress. For a long time I never thought I'd find a real partner that I could share myself with. And I'm so glad I was wrong there. Things have a way of working out. Eventually if you want something bad enough and work for it you will find it.
I worked all my life to get to where I am today. Now I run a small franchise and I've found the woman I will spend the rest of my life with. My girl side has plenty of space to stretch out. And even with very little cash left at the end of the month I've found happiness.
After reading some of the posts/threads, I like the people here a lot already. It's been a couple years since I have been a member on any forum. This place has changed and so have I. Now there's new faces, new viewpoints, new ideas.
Anywayz that's me for now,
Thanks for reading
I realized that I did not do much of an introduction so you know very little about me. I'm in my late 30s and I'm living with fiancé. We have been through a lot together but worked hard to get a place to ourselves on a little land. I love her more than she knows.
Since a very young age until about 9 years ago, I had been closeted. Up until then I lived the manly life doing manly things but never really living as a whole person. Then when I came out for the first time, everything started changing and I swore I wouldn't/couldn't go back. I spent a lot of time figuring out who I was inside and letting her out slowly but surely. She has prospered into a lovely flower now.
As time goes by, your perceptions change and so does your attitude. The world changed around me. But I managed to hang on just long enough to see the light. I'm just glad I did before giving up. I had plenty of turmoil and stress over my internal battle as well as regular life. I've tried the purging, the pink fog thingy, and then settled on finding out what I really want to be and loving it for all that it is. Many of my friends have moved on without me, living their lives as they were. Friends I made on the internet have also disappeared. Some passed on.. bless their souls. The names matter not now, however their spirits touched me. I won't forget them or the honor of knowing any of their secrets.
I've gone out dressed a handful of times and enjoyed them. Got that out of my system so to speak and would do it again if/when the time comes. For those who have not had a ladies night out, I recommend removing the stick from your butt and get out there, it's an amazing feeling. I love shock value but I also like to blend in. We really never heard any bad mouthing when I was 'out'. Although I wasn't so good on my voice back then, I just made sure I didn't talk a lot.:heehee:
That time passed on to other things. Relocating, starting over. Defining my goals and so on. I know what I want and what to avoid. I'm really harmless and don't mean to offend anyone. Sometimes I just get carried away trying to have fun, or because I'm upset at something else..
Dressing is just a form of expressing what's inside to me, I'm always me inside. I don't get dressed to feel better but I certainly feel better when I dress. For a long time I never thought I'd find a real partner that I could share myself with. And I'm so glad I was wrong there. Things have a way of working out. Eventually if you want something bad enough and work for it you will find it.
I worked all my life to get to where I am today. Now I run a small franchise and I've found the woman I will spend the rest of my life with. My girl side has plenty of space to stretch out. And even with very little cash left at the end of the month I've found happiness.
After reading some of the posts/threads, I like the people here a lot already. It's been a couple years since I have been a member on any forum. This place has changed and so have I. Now there's new faces, new viewpoints, new ideas.
Anywayz that's me for now,
Thanks for reading