Experiences on other forums...

[Mink]

Hey!

was wondering what experiences people have with other forums

mainly other CD forums but non CD ones too!

i know many will just say "i only like here! here is the best!" and that's fine too but i'm def. curious about others too

long time ago and for a long time i was on one called pantiesetc which was more about guys just wearing the underwear... and now there's one called hewearspanties which seems a bit better... they're fine with people wearing / doing more but they're fine with wherever you are at! ... and keeping things from turning x-rated and whatnot... that is key to me!

this place always feels REALLY focused on going the full presentation and then TStuff too... and far beyond!

also i was wondering if people had any experience on Non-CD forums talking about themselves? i'm on a music one where like a decade ago i was "outed" and it kinda sucked but then over the years i talked to girls about fashion and such and it was fun! ... but then also there were jerks who were kinda crappy too... that's the gamble!

sometimes the light joking about things could be fun and i didn't mind...

no one ever seems all that interested really to really ask much more in depth though i have talked about issues on there like wondering if i was transgendered or what they thought about me getting a sex change had i ever gone down that route

it can be interesting to get that outside perspective but still be somewhat behind the cloak of the anon. of the intronet!

what say you!

[Allesandra Rhodes]

I've been on a couple technical forums but not very much, the responses seemed more robotic vs forums on this nature. Kind of like being back in the closet, I couldn't really be myself. Some places you just feel better with, some are specialized. Some may make you feel intimidated. They are there for a purpose and contribute to that purpose. It's nice for some people to start out being behind the curtain of an avatar, this allows some comfort whilst testing the waters. Later on you find you've made acquaintances and become part of something. Something that may indeed make all the difference. Or maybe it just passes the time and makes you feel better. I prefer the diversity, a bit of something for everyone. And hopefully I can reciprocate that.

[Deedee Skyblue]

Don't know if I can name other fourms here or not. Real Crossdressers dot com is too much about sex for me, and I haven't tried any others. Apparently sending me PMs with pictures of male sex organs is supposed to be interesting to me? I know what they look like - in fact, I have one of my own. So I cancelled my membership there and found this place, which is about people rather than sex.

Deedee

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Mink, A long time ago I joined two other forums but never posted on one and only very few times on the other one.
It just don't get any better than this forum.!!

[Dalva]

Totally non CD related? - I'm a member of a few different video game studio forums which I enjoy very much. I'm also in a forum for single fathers.

CD related? - I joined a couple of others a short time before joining here. I have hardly visited them since coming here. One of them was ok, I guess but not very busy. The other one was waaaay too uptight. I got chastised by a moderator for even implying (let alone describing ) sexual matters and once, one of the other members criticized my choice in pantyhose in a rather mean way.

Once I started to hang out here, I really haven't looked back at the others. I really like it here. You're all a bunch of swell gals.

:gh:

[Leona]

I hang out on the Armagetron Advanced forums, and have done so for 9 years now. I sorta have to, these days, I'm one of the project administrators. :) I'm "out" there, and there's at least one other occasional forum user who is also out there. The community is welcoming of anybody LGBT on the forums, but in-game on private servers you may get different reactions. But as a moderator on those forums, you can generally trust me to stamp out hate speech about anything on the LGBT continuum (and I'm not the only mod who feels that way).

[RADER]

When you are at the Best, why look for anything else.
I do on occasion check in at MWB (Men Wearing Bra's)
Not as active as here, but their total subject is men wearing bra's
Rader

[Ressie]

i'm on a music one where like a decade ago i was "outed" How did that happen?

There's a music related site I've been a member of for years. One of the members was showing his disgust of gays, and another member responded by saying he was gay. Back and forth he said "really, Im gay". And shortly after that he didn't come back. Some members of those forums also forget that there are women members too. I've also seen blacks get offended and say goodbye. Most CD sites I've seen don't have a forum or much of one. This is the most active forum I've seen in any category.

[Nicole Erin]

Been on a few. Most are pretty dead. One active one I go to at times that is kind of busy but they talk about mostly the same stuff we see all the time here.

[Mink]

How did that happen?

oh god! i had met up with a gal from the forum who said she was totally cool with me dressing... and she wasn't nearly as cool with it as she made it out to be... we then had a falling out and she just spread it all around

first lady i ever told too

(that sure showed me!)

[Dianne S]

I hang out on technical forums like slashdot.org. Also occasionally comment on Disqus forums on mainstream media sites. I did join crossdressingzone.com which is a decent forum, but not nearly as active as this one and the forum software isn't as good.

[Asche]

I've been looking at other sites lately, but I don't know if the CD.com rules allow me to say which ones.

I haven't been posting much here, mostly because I don't feel particularly at home. CD.com seems to cater to a rather socially conservative demographic, especially regarding attitudes towards women and gender roles, and the CDing itself is framed to fit into that mindset. If I read too many posts, I start to feel like I've fallen through a time warp back to the 1950's and early 1960's. I don't fit into this mindset, both social-politically and in how I approach my "dressing."


no one ever seems all that interested really to really ask much more in depth though i have talked about issues on there like wondering if i was transgendered or what they thought about me getting a sex change
I think the passage I quoted was describing other sites, but it describes my own experience here. I've tried talking about how I feel and how I dress, but since it doesn't fit into the Standard Model here, I get ignored (at best.)

[Tracii G]

I have been on a few others but they get too creepy for me.One was more sex/ fetish oriented and was super sleezy so I left after a few weeks.

[ArleneRaquel]

I belong to many CD oriented site, in fact at one I jave over 2,000 post. Also belong to a few political/conspiracy sites. I don't belong to any creepy sites.

[ME2.0]

The thing that attracts me to this forum is that the other ones I tried to belong to were all about sex. My message box was filled with questions about meeting men, and what I'd like to do to them. This forum is much more cerebral. Getting dressed for me isnt' a fetish--sex isn't even involved. I like that people talk about techniques, feelings, experiences, and most of all personality. This forum is a place for CD's to lean on each other as we all try to figure ourselves out. This forum isn't a place to feel victimized by a bunch of sexual predators. If this forum ever became that, I'd leave. But I've been here a little while, and hope to be here a long time to come.

We're all "sisters" here.

Hugs,
Staci

[AmyGaleRT]

Mink, I used to run a (non-CD) virtual community forum. It was a rewarding experience while it lasted, but I don't know if I'd want to do it again. It has given me a great deal of appreciation for the mods on this and other forums! :)

I'm only on a couple of other CD forums besides this one, and this one is the one that gets the lion's share of my participation. I'm on mainly technical forums as my male self these days.

- Amy

[Yolanda_Voils]

I was a moderator on one very large forum for years, I left in good standing.
That said,, you will have varying experiences depending upon the mindset of the moderators.

[Connie.Marie]

Mink,
I used to belong to URnotAlone.com and loved it. It is a Crossdressing / Transgender site that had a lot more pictures, but no place to read a lot about other peoples' thoughts & ideas. One thing that it does have that I miss is the ability to chat with other members when they are on line. I had to leave URNA when my Brother-In-Law signed on as an admirer - since I'm still in the closet to all but my wife, that was too close for comfort. Worried that he would "find" me.

Finding this site to be interesting..

Hugs, Connie Marie

[Melissa73]

i must chime in... ive joined a few other sites... but i concur, most do get into to much sex. I perfe this one, as its more of a support for me... to help me cpe with the man/woman i want to be....

melissa

[Allison Quinn]

The only other one I've been on was larua's playground. It didn't get into sex really, but the users except for the mods were highly inactive and it was sort of a downer c: I like that people actually post here

[il.dso]

I'm loyal and dedicated to this wonderful site!
Two other websites worth reading and following are:
www.hewearspanties.com and
hannahgotta.wordpress.com
Always amazed at how much information is out there...

[Beverley Sims]

This forum appears to have less flaming, divisiveness and senseless arguments than most other forums I have looked at.

[Allison Quinn]

This I like about this forum!
I've seen some forums where the whole basis of it is built on flaming or lets see how angry we can make OP :P

[Tamara Croft]

This forum appears to have less flaming...You think so?? ha! That's because you only see what we want you to see, if we left all the arguments, flame wars etc... it would be a different forum indeed :) Not to mention I'm mean :raspp:

[robindee36]

Having been here only a short while, my perspective is limited. There are a lot of 'meat markets' out there which are OK if that's what you're looking for. The forum here seems to be more about sharing information, having a bit of fun (the word game thread) and exchanging ideas with like minded folks.

Yes, there are some flame bait threads and some snarky remarks (you know who you are ;) but it had been a pretty nice experience so far.

Hugs, Robin

[linda allen]

I've been on web forums for many years, mostly focused on other subjects, not crossdressing. I have found that over the years, participants in these forums have become far less civil (a reflection of society in general). "Hiding" behind a keyboard using an anonymous screen name has enabled folks to pretend they are people they are not, pretend to have knowledge and experience that they don't have, and post things that would get them punched in the face if said in person.

I have also seen forums get "taken over" by a few members who always agree with each other and disagree with any new folks.

In any case, it's important for everyone to remember that this is the Internet and what you read here may or may not have happened and advice you see here may or may not be good advice. If you're asking what color hose to wear with a particular outfit, that's fine. If you're asking about how to save your marriage or if you should crossdress at work, think about the replies very carefully before you act.

I have not joined any other crossdressing forums so I can't speak to them or compare them to this one.

[Secret Drawer]

As a non sexual crossdresser, I find any sexually oriented forums to be bothersome. I think the two that I have posted on other than here are hewearspanties.com and I think its called skirtcafe? I think that the HWP site is excellent, but perhaps a bit over moderated as sometimes you are flamed without the ability to fight back... skirtcafe seems to have a problem with tone, as in either you are a crossdresser or a "mans man who just happens to wear a skirt, not at all a crossdresser, leave me alone!" but if you can find a balance...
I think this is the most balanced and fairly moderated site, and for those who get the feeling it is a bit too much (and not to be judgemental!) I would recommend HWP.

[MysticLady]

Been on a few. Most are pretty dead. One active one I go to at times that is kind of busy but they talk about mostly the same stuff we see all the time here.

Like, what color are your Panties?:heehee:


I've tried talking about how I feel and how I dress, but since it doesn't fit into the Standard Model here, I get ignored (at best.)

Welcome to the club, sweetie:hugs:



We're all "sisters" here.


And just like sisters, we cat fight sometimes....Meow:)



Yes, there are some flame bait threads and some snarky remarks (you know who you are ;) but it had been a pretty nice experience so far.


Who are they, Robin? Please enlighten me:heehee:



I have also seen forums get "taken over" by a few members who always agree with each other and disagree with any new folks.


Gosh Linda, it sounds like our Government:heehee:

[Helengraham]

I am on a UK crossdressing forum which is pretty good,, but I like what I see here so far.

[robindee36]

Sorry Victoria, I know better than to bite on that bait.

Hugs, Robin

[mariehart]

I'm was on tgboards which is quite serious and of course mostly for TG/TS. I also was on a general Irish forum, boards.ie which has a LGBT section. Of course I had two identities. It was good on one level because there were always a few of us around to educate people on other sections when they were either making fun of us or had some misapprehensions. Don't contribute there now though. I have really cut back on contributing to forums because for the most part most of what you say is lost in the general babel of the internet. Even this forum.

[Mink]

i can def. understand that feeling of being lost in the shuffle

or feeling like people post their own thoughts without even reading everyone elses or responding to interesting points!

i also feel like as the internet has expanded to so many more people over the last 5/10 years and into different venues (i don't really DO facebook / twitter / etc) ... that message board forums are slowing down a bit or maybe less appealing to younger people? i don't know it's hard to say!

i know i'm always searching for good places to relate and get advice or just talk about fun things

regardless of the topic!

though of course CD forums give an avenue that is hard to just randomly talk about...

in fact one thing i thought of is how frustrating it is one some forums where there is GIRL TALK and wanting to join in but feeling like that'd be stepping over the line or just awkward / ignored

there's one board where there's a "girl's only" thread which always kinda bothered me and any time they talk about certain subjects it's fun and interesting to read but super annoying feeling like i can't particpate in the discussion...

[MatildaJ.]

Others seem to be mentioning specific groups, so I'll say that I like the "Gender Blender" group on the FetLife site.

[Tamara Croft]

You can mention other sites as long as they are within our board rules - no porn etc.

I think this is the best CD'ing site on the internet, or maybe I'm just bias ;) It hasn't always been like this you know, when I first joined in 2004 it was full of porn, bad language, flame wars etc etc... and had 6 sections. Then I got my hands on it in 2005 ;)

That UK CD'ing forum is Roses and yes it's a nice forum :)

[darla_g]

I tend to do most of my own work on my cars so i belong to a number of car forums for all model cars i own. They range from snotty and pretentious (BMW) to downright helpful (Subaru). I also belong to other CD boards as well.

[Catherine Hopkins]

That UK CD'ing forum is Roses and yes it's a nice forum :)

You might very well say that, Tamara. I couldn't possibly comment ;)

But thanks.

[Tara D. Rose]

I've been on several other forums that are somewhat about cross dressers, and ts's, this is a good one, but all of them have their good people and bad people. I used to think that life long cross dressers were mostly alike. I used to think that for the most part we were all very nice people. I used to think that when attending cd/ts events, that at least we could all be friends and maybe, if not friends, that most of us were at minimum, polite people. Other sites, other than this one, they are mostly filled with popular members from that site, filled with very cocky, better than thou egos and attitudes, the snootiness, with mods dispensing the rules in unequal, unfair, bias and unjust ways. bla bla.
I once was lost for many years, then I thought I was found when I found this site and with all of the sharing with so many from this site and many others, and with all of the cd's I have met in person, I find myself lost again with no hope. It seems that I have gone backwards. It's a superficial world here as well as any other cd website. There is no right and wrong, no peace, full of self righteous today but not tomorrow contradictions, full of those that seem to thrive with constant adversity and turmoil. Where is the realness? It is sad that a member of our community, whom I met at SCC is dead now. That is so sad. Where could she have turned to for help and answers? ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,but it's too late for her now. So sad.

[Tamara Croft]

Tara that's so sad :( so who was it we've lost? (sorry if I've missed it somewhere) :hugs:

[Kate Simmons]

My limited experiences on other CD Forums have been less than desirable. This is the only one I call "home". :)

[AmyGaleRT]

It hasn't always been like this you know, when I first joined in 2004 it was full of porn, bad language, flame wars etc etc... and had 6 sections. Then I got my hands on it in 2005 ;)

I commend you for the job you've done! I know it's not an easy task...

- Amy

[Allesandra Rhodes]

It takes a lot of dedication to pull this place off. Tamara's done a great job.

*flix her halo*

[Jenny Gurl]

I belong to several discussion forums. I use to come here more often, but I felt a bit sad and maybe a little unwelcome when this forum made it a rule that I could not even talk about my primary hobby. It wasn't that we discussed it any more often than other hobbies like cars or music, but when that rule was passed that the very word was banned I really felt unwelcome. I hang out on other sites more that share my primary hobby now but I do come back on occasion to see how some of those I have come to know are doing.

[Badtranny]

This board isn't perfect. It does seem to attract an older clientele, and there is a weird sexless/Disney vibe here that mildly disturbs me sometimes, but I have an enormous respect for Tamara and even though some of the mods here are ...different, my affection for her helps to keep my lips zipped when I'd rather fight it out.

There are also some really bright people here and as a writer and pretend intellectual I can say that I've read some of the most interesting thoughts here that I've seen in all my years of keyboard banging. From BBS to Usenet, this forum has some of the most agile minds that I've ever seen.

Unfortunately, there's not enough great topics to sustain great discussion.

[ME2.0]

BadTranny, I love it that it has a "Weird Sexless vibe". It's the only place on the internet where it can be found. If you want a sex vibe, I'm sure you won't have to look too hard to find it on the net.

Just my opinion,
Staci

[AbigailAlexis]

I looked at several others before joining here. And, I must say that this was the only one I felt comfortable reading and actually wanted to respond to folks in. The group here is so diverse in ideology.

In the short time I've been here, the hardest thing was to accept honesty when you ask for it. People will make assumptions and try to fill in the blanks if you don't give them all the info (and sometimes you aren't ready to, or haven't gotten there yet); it's not their fault, we are all human and that humanity def shows here (it's now one of my favorite things about the forums). People are real. (And to those waiting... don't worry "the info" is coming ;) )

The only thing I don't like, since folks are posting... is the age limit on the 18-30 forum... at 31 when I joined I do get treated like the "young pup" in the main forums on occasion and have no resource to go "act my age" in an area that more closely resembles me in age (that's not to say everyone is older, but many are). I realize that there needs to be limits or chaos ensues, but this one has been hard for me. (And no I didn't request access, I read the rules like a good "young pup" :p )

[AmyGaleRT]

Abby, as they say, "age ain't nothin' but a number." And many of us are a bit "girlish" despite being chronologically older than you. I'm sure you'll fit in just fine. :)

- Amy

[Bethany_Anne_Fae]

Anyone remember one of the first boards before there were "boards" called "T-Boat (short for transgendered boat)? That was my first talking experience. I've been a member of the crossdressersclub forum but haven't been there in a long time. This one is well-moderated, keeps things decent and inspires solid discussion of the things that are important to most of us.

Thanks for this site :)

Bethany

[AllieSF]

I will add another vote for urnotalone.com. Sometimes on the surface it may appear to be just another so-so site for us on the "T" side of life. It does have a broad spectrum of members, some of whom would never last long here, and the chat feature is very nice, but again, one needs to be pragmatic about it and recognize that some bad comes with the good. However, it does have a wealth of resources, including local ones, for local support services when one searches for members near where they live. That is invaluable for someone starting out and not knowing where to "start". I have also met several members from there who are wonderful people.

[reb.femme]

You think so?? ha! That's because you only see what we want you to see, if we left all the arguments, flame wars etc... it would be a different forum indeed :) Not to mention I'm mean :raspp:

Yep! to all aspects above. If I need people in my face all the time, I'll join the Police, not become a Mod.

I use one UK CD website, similar in stance to here, but the vast majority of my time and effort is to this forum. I like the international flavour and attitude of the contributors here, ....in general :heehee:. If I was after sex of any description, I know perfectly well how to find it and it's not through sleazy web sites. That's not to knock sleazy sites if that's your thing, just I don't need it in my day to day life and I've got a gorgeous wife who more than keeps me happy.

Long may this forum continue in the same vein.....no puns intended!

Rebecca

[Tara D. Rose]

Hi Badtranny, would you consider me one of the bright ones or one of the dim ones?

[Babette]

Years ago (wow that makes me feel old) I looked into other CD/TG forums. Being a firm believer in "first impressions meaning the most", I was quickly disappointed. Like some have said, the other forums were too often about sex, hookups, and comments so blatantly offensive I wanted turn in my "T" card and live on the moon. Then I found Crossdressers.com and have been here ever since. Sure we get some riffraff once in a while but they are ferreted out and quickly shown the door. That's what I appreciate about a well-run forum!

I do participate in several technical forums. Like most discussion groups, the "alpha types" find a way into the group and start their cyber bullying. Perhaps you know the type. These are the people with one purpose in life - to take exception with every point of view but their own. Disagreement is not wrong provided tact, respect and diplomacy are exercised. If left unchecked, these people will preempt good discussion and eventually destroy the forum.

Babette

[crotchhiboots]

I hangout at highheel place a lot They discourage tv talk but are open to alternative fasion..

[Asche]

Since the mods seem to be saying that mentioning sites by name is okay, I'll mention the ones I've looked at.

I spent quite a while at skirtcafe.org . It's a friendly bunch, much smaller than here. The focus is on men in skirts, not on men dressing as women (e.g., no men using female screen names.) Most of the guys there are concerned with maintaining a masculine appearance, but there is a contingent of people interested in a more mixed presentation.

Lately, I've been participating in Susans.org. There's a lot less traffic, but a higher rate of postings I'm interested in. It's also divided up into more categories, so people with similar interests may actually find your posting. I've posted some stuff and actually gotten responses. It's a more diverse crowd, lots of TSs and lots of non-binary and androgynous and none-of-the-above people. I haven't looked at the CD forum much, but what I've seen is much less One True Way than here. It's interesting -- ReineD recently pronounced me "crossdresser" here, but over there, it's the "Androgyne" forum I feel most at home in.

For that matter, freethoughtblogs.com has some interesting bloggers, if you're not bothered by evangelical atheism. There was one TS blogger who recently moved on, and at least one (Zinnia Jones) still posts (when her life doesn't get in the way.) You get a feeling for the enormous variety of trans experience.

BTW: I notice that this forum has gotten a lot more civil lately (like the last 3-6 months or so.) Is it safe to assume that there's some heavy modding going on?

[Tamara Croft]

BTW: I notice that this forum has gotten a lot more civil lately (like the last 3-6 months or so.) Is it safe to assume that there's some heavy modding going on?Probably because I got my :dom: out and kicked the trouble makers out ;)

[Cassandra Lynn]

I've made my rounds, and hung out here quite alot early on after going cyber in late 2009.

The site i felt most at home was CDC, aka thecrossdressersclub, but the place lost most of it's magic for me when the folks i first go to know and love all moved on in RL.

And i think you knew (or still know) some of them quite well Tamara. :)

I had to leave for a while, and i went back this past spring but it was still lacking and has now gone silent again.....and a pity it is for many too.

I'm more the pop on and have a looksy around type, and i still visit a handful of sites, but i guess all in all, i have become jaded.

[Maryesther M.]

I hang out on Skirtcafe, which I enjoy. CrossdresserClub was very friendly too, but is off the web again at the moment. I briefly hooked up to Club Crossdressers and didn't like it at all, so I've quit there.

I also contribute to other for a which are about diverse other subjects.

M.

[Eryn]

I belong to several discussion forums. I use to come here more often, but I felt a bit sad and maybe a little unwelcome when this forum made it a rule that I could not even talk about my primary hobby.

Y'know, even though the topic isn't forbidden here I don't talk about my primary hobby on this forum and that hasn't hurt me in the least. I talk about that hobby on other forums that are devoted to it. That way I can talk to people about CDing here without forcing them to read about something that I love but they may not find as fascinating.

There is a very good reason why certain discussion topics are not allowed. Experience has shown that some topics invariably result in flamewars. Nobody is going to change their minds on such topics so the only result is bad feelings and broken friendships.

[ReineD]

I don't post regularly on other forums even though I belong to a few. But, my SO participates on a mostly political website .. it's not a forum like this one exactly but there are regulars who debate the news of the day.

The place is not moderated and I can't tell you how stupid and childish grown people get sometimes. I don't know how my SO puts up with the nonsense. The flamers are always the same people even though they keep changing their names and so at least the regulars know enough to ignore them. But these flamers constantly ruin any chance of an intelligent political debate. It's just unbelievable how ignorant and racist and generally intolerant these people can be and it makes reading the debates tiresome for the rest of us.

The worst that I see online are the comments left under controversial articles. The negativity is astounding, especially when it comes to sexual and gender diversity. There are so many haters around it boggles the mind.

[Amanda M]

Curious creature as I am, I have had a look at several other forums (fora?) and have had similar experiences to most who have commented here. WAY too much sleaze out their. Clearly, I enjoy being here, but I have found that Roses, and the Gender Society/Frock Magazine site are good too. Mind you that fact that I'm doing a column for Frock may have something to do with that.

Ans, Tamara, I do love it when you get the whip out...............

[mbmeen12]

I have been on several sites but mostly because out of curiosity. This site has been my light house and I have made lots of friends here. The knowledge which I have gained from here is amazing, it has help me see through the pink fog. Now with that being said, I am open to any new insight.

[edith]

I mainly hang out on the reddit crossdressing community, and come here secondarily. Reddit is mostly pictures and advice, which at this point is my primary interest. There are discussion threads, but nothing like we get here. I love that both places are mostly non-sexual in nature.

Like AbigailAlexis mentioned a few posts back, I feel frustrated at being locked out of the "young people" subforum (I'm 31). That's another reason why I find myself on reddit more than here.

I'm a member on several non-cding boards as well. Technical stuff, digital art, and various fandoms. I'm a moderator on a large keyboard enthusiast forum. Huge props to the mods around here btw -- this place feels very civil and troll-free compared to other forums I could name.

edit: 100th post! :D