Does your partner understand you?

[Madforboots]

(sory the english)
Hello everyone. I'm new to crossdressers.com, but until now i'm loving the site and the forum. :D
I started dressing at the age of 14. I love wear boots, lingerie and casual clothes.

I've started with my girlfriend at 3years and we have a great relationship, as a boy and a girl. In the end of the first year i told her that i love to dress as a girl. At that time she didn't said notihng to demote me of my fantasy. But now she doesn't wan't to ear me talk about it. She think that i'm to young for this. The problem is that she is the only one that know's that I have this fantasy/life style. Sometimes I fell a little lonely, don't have anyone to talk.

How do you "concil"(coordenate) your "feminine" life and you girlfriend/partner?

[Julie]

Hi Mad, and welcome.

She thinks you're too young for this? At what age does she think it's appropriate for a man to want to dress as a woman? :confused:

What you will probably find is she is very insecure about this. Many women think this will eventually replace them when nothing could be further from the truth. I have never been female, was not raised as a girl and have no idea what it's like to be a woman so I won't pretend to have all the answers.

What I have seen in my life is women are competitive with one another and when it comes to their man they will fight to the death. If your feminine personna is perceived as being another woman you can expect that fight to happen. She needs to realize she's not losing you to another woman, a man or anyone. What she needs to realize is you are opening a very special part of yourself to her and her alone. You want to share all of yourself with her and not just a portion like you do with everyone else.

It takes a very special lady to understand this. She has to be very secure with herself or you have to make sure she is. Take baby steps, don't rush anything. She might come aroung, she might not. Whatever the outcome you'll be better off for being honest and upfront with her.

Stay with us and keep asking questions. You'll be surprised just how much you will learn, how much confidence you'll gain and how much better you will feel about yourself.

[Nikki A.]

You did the right thing telling her sooner rather than later, If she really loves you there will be an understanding. If not, keep on looking and you will never know.

[samanthajay]

its alway goo to be honest to your gg. mine likes it when i dress. she said what ever i felt that she would still love me for who i am. if she loves you enough with all her heart then she should except it as a part of you that will never go away nomatter what happens. if a woman dosn't love you for who you are then .........well...........you maybe it isn't to be. but hopefully she will come aroun and see the good side of it. it may take her awile but bear with her.i hope it goes well. :D

[Lily_gg]

I have to agree with Julie - I'm a gg (genetic girl) who's boyfriend has recently admitted to himself (been denying it since the age of five, poor lamb), and then me, that he dresses...

At times, I worry (but only a little!) that he's going to want to dress all the time, or need to dress every time we're being intimate together - it's an insecurity, not necessarily that the dressing will replace me, but that I won't be enough without it - he'll still want a woman, but it wouldn't matter who provided he could dress - if you can show your girlfriend that this isn't the case, that she is still the one thing that all your affections focus on (and the dressing is just another bit of you, rather than due to her lacking in any way), maybe she'd feel more secure about it all.

Oh, and how about indulging some of her secret fantasies/dreams? If she feels that the relationship is balanced in terms of who gets to do what, maybe she'd accept it more?

Also, sit her down and explain that she is the only person in the entire world that you have ever been close enough to, and trusted enough, to tell all this too, and that's because she's so wonderful and special to you, and you can't imagine your life without her - you'd be surprised how strongly she'll react to a heartfelt declaration of your love for her (you *have* to really mean it though)

And if when it comes down to it, she really really can't deal with it, just be honest with yourselves that that's the case.

Good luck!!!