Does getting read bother you?

[Marcelle]

Hi all,

Yesterday was another outing for me as I am cooking Thanksgiving dinner and needed a few items (okay a lot of items) as well as wine. My past outings I have kind of taken the caution of going early (less people and all). However, this time I had to go later to ensure the liquor store was open. Kind of put the Thanksgiving weekend thing in the back of my mind so when I showed up at the grocery store, it was really, really packed :eek:. That meant for the first time I was going to be under close scrutiny.

Now while from a distance I think I blend reasonably well, closer inspection will always be "yup dude in drag". So I took a breath, got out of the car (this was my first time wearing a dress in public so I was even more self-conscious (if you are interested in what I was wearing here is the link http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?202504-Went-out-again-today).

Got to the store, got a cart and started. First two people I ran into read me immediately, I could tell by their expression (not a pleasant by the way). Had a few other stares (mainly by men who looked quite confused and slightly irritated). I had one women actually go out of her way to avoid me. But for the most part people didn't notice (more likely didn't care). I did have a lovely conversation with the young girl who checked out my groceries.

I have to admit, it was a bit of a bummer being read so easily but then again, I believe I will the topic of many a Thanksgiving Dinner this weekend . . . "Hey I was out getting groceries and guess what I saw ... " :)

So my question for you who go out (unless you pass 100 percent that is), does it bother you when you get read and if it does it ever dissipate the more you go out. Specifically, do you just get used to it and ignore the rude stares/giggles or learn to accept it as part of being.

Hugs

Isha

[linda allen]

You have to ignore the stares and comments, there's no point in confronting anyone. I have only been out a few times and I try to avoid close encounters so I don't know if I've been read or not. Most folks are polite enough or too busy with their own chores to actually say anything rude or stare obviously. Some folks will be nice or even go out of their way to be nice, like the checkout girl you spoke of. It could be their personality or it could be store policy.

I recall a stare and look of dissaproval (from a woman) on a past outing and it did bother me and take the pleasure out of the trip for a while. On the other hand, I have had people I pass on the street say "good morning" to me and men step off the sidewalk to let me pass. There's the good and the bad.

[Diane78]

The more I go out, the less stares I notice, probably because I don't really care anymore if I get read. Lately I even want to get read. I get into more conversations when I am dressed and people smile at me a lot, especially women. Men also seem to want to talk, on occasion. I know that I am being my authentic self, it doesn't hurt anyone, not illegal and feels good besides. I love to show plenty of cleavage too. My girlfriend says I have good legs and advises me on wardrobe and makeup. She is a great support.

[Tracii G]

I get read a lot and yeah when you try too look as good as you can seems to be when that happens.
Some look some don't and its a mixed reaction from the ones that read you.
I am pretty much over worrying about it and just go out and do what I need to do.
Its funny when you don't try so hard to pass is when you pass the best.
I can go months and never get so much as a look and sometimes I can get read more in one day to make up for it.

[Nikki A.]

I really don't care if I'm read or not and it gets easier the more you go out. The one time I let it get to me was when I thought I was looking really good one day after church, when I was entering the diner afterwards an older gent opened the door for me and then said "After you Sir", well it blew my bubble for a bit but at least I had a gent hold a door for me.

[Stephanie47]

I've limited my outings to walks in the early evening with the intention of avoiding contacts. I will never pass as a woman. I dress for stress relief and the peace and tranquility it brings. I think I would be very self conscious of society's negative spin on cross dressing if I were read. I did go out as a woman several times at Halloween and got mixed reactions' laughed at by a guy who had maybe too much booze, and, complimented by a young cashier. To actually mix socially with men and woman while en femme would be very unnerving to me.

[ArleneRaquel]

I get read about 99% of the time and I don't care. I just desire to live the life that I chosen, which is living, or more accurately dressing as a woman 24/7.

[Beverley Sims]

As long as there is no aggressive confrontation.

[heellover]

I have been out a couple Halloweens,but I don't really think that counts. So I have only been out once,and mind you the place where I went was a LGBT bar. I know I was read,but no one really batted an eye at me. In fact there was an older couple,likely in their late 50s early 60s,that sat next to my wife and I and at one point during the evening he bumped into me,and he said "I'm very sorry miss!". So I'm not sure if he was being polite or I was convincing enough to fool him.
(I personally don't think so)
It was the monthly drag show at this bar,and a few of the performers told me I looked very good and convincing and didn't believe that that was only my first outing.

[biggirlsarah]

Personally I don't mind getting read especially as I don't pass and I am not under any misconception that I do, but what I do mind is getting abuse, which normally if it is going to come is from the younger people especially if they are in a group and the especially boys who think it is big to make fun of the tranny, also I personally take offence at being referred to as sir which is what happened to me the other day in a cafe, I was with my wife and got us both a cup of coffee the gentleman refered to me as sir , I replied saying I will pretend I didn't hear that , adding I know I am not fooling anyone but it is nice to be humoured occasionally, later we went into a pen shop and the lady there was very accommodating and never referred to my gender in any way what so ever.

[Sophie Yang]

Isha,

I was going to respond to your "Afraid of losing your male identity" post, but never got around to it. But my response to either one applies to both. Google the book Male-Femaling, by Richard Ekins. I am not sure why it is classified as a medical book. I think you will find it a quick and interesting read. He describes the many different Male-Femaling paths one can take and where they end up.

The book addresses your "Afraid of losing your male identity" post. He describes

Beginning Male-Femaling
Fantasy Male-Femaling
Doing Male-Femaling, developing different styles
Constituting
Consolidating (aparting, substituting, and integrating


Within this framework there are some insightful chapters on different ways people reading and being read interact with each other.

I have never had a bad interaction after being read. If say walking down the sidewalk and I suspect that someone read me as we pass, I turn around and see if they also turn around. Hasn't happen in a long time. Same thing in a crowded room. I take a quick look to see if I am getting an awkward glance or snicker. For me now, I think it is more my mind conjuring up things that aren't happening.

I was read a month or so ago when I caught a shuttle bus to the airport which is 90 minutes away. The driver sir'ed me once. I still tipped him when we arrived at the airport. Never had a problem after that. Still use the service, usually the same driver up to the airport and different drivers down.

Cute outfit.

[Zylia]

If you look/move/sound like a 'dude in drag' like the vast majority of us you will get read, that's the name of the game. If I wasn't bothered about it at all I probably wouldn't spend 'so much' time on my appearance, but I know it's a game you can't really win, except if you don't play.

Worse than being read however is being treated disrespectful.

[kimdl93]

Just a bit. I expect to be read so I'm pleased when I'm not.

[Allison Quinn]

it does kind of bother me at times o3o
What bothers me is when some people can read me while others really just can't and I don't understand it xD

[Kiva]

I hate being read when I'm in drab, and someone says...."yeah look at him. He's a wannabe for sure."

[Sheren Kelly]

If you look/move/sound like a 'dude in drag' like the vast majority of us you will get read,..Worse than being read however is being treated disrespectful.

When I go out I try to act with dignity and I tend to be accepted. I have no illusions that I "pass", particularly at close range. I always assume I am read, but am treated with the same respect I show others. On those times the situation is uncomfortable or I am treated less respectfully, I remember that how others treat me says more about their insecurities and prejudices than it says anything about who I am.

[BeckyAnderson]

Well...I could care less if I'm read or not and most times I'm am. I really don't need someone's approval. I feel perfectly comfortable in my own skin. People are going to look, people are going to be inquisitive and some will want to talk with you. I take it all in stride. Usually, if I get a negative reaction in the form of a stare or snicker, I generally look at the person and give them a smile. Smiling seems to convey confidence and self acceptance and they seem to be much more at ease with seeing a crossdresser. I couldn't even begin to count the number of times I've been out but each and every time I venture out I am appropriately dressed.....helps a bunch.

Anyway, enjoy the freedom of venturing out and relish the feelings that go along with it. Hugs, Becky

[Angela Campbell]

I really do not know if I have ever been read, no one has ever said anything or done anything.

[Alice Torn]

Somewhat. At six foot six barefoot, i stick out like a scarecrow. I need a thicker skin, to do this in public, as i will be watched. Different angles, we may look more like ladies, but other angles, blow our cover. In close contact, i know i will be read almost always. I did ok, with jeers a few times out, and hope i can handle more, by letting it fall off me like water off a duckies back.

[Kate Simmons]

Nope, but, then again, I'm never trying to "pass" as someone or something I'm not Hon. ;):battingeyelashes::)

[reb.femme]

I don' mind getting read but it's what comes with it that matters. I have no delusions that I pass but I try to fly under the radar. That is my simple intention.

Had our local Trans Meet last night and a group of 4 (2 girls and 2 guys) sat on a table next to us.

I was talking to a guy from the pub about buying a website and caught sight of one of the guys from the group looking at me, in what I can only describe as a sneer. I'm sure he was simply jealous of the fact that I was prettier than his girl.......not! :heehee:

I just looked away but wished I had smiled back. Maybe he was uncomfortable with us/me being in close proximity but that's his problem, not mine. Anyway, any trouble and I could have hit him with my handbag :heehee:.

Rebecca

[Suzanne F]

Isha
No I don't mind being read anymore. It does go away the more you go out. I am just so happy to be out that it doesn't matter to me. I feel pretty and happy and I think most people that notice me see that. Sure there are a few who stare but I don't spend much time concentrating on that. I think being with Allie and Rachael has also helped. We seem to be able to go anywhere we want and people are so sweet to us. Maybe you need to find some other girls to get your confidence up. I love starting the evening out by myself and then meeting up with them later. Anyway keep going for it! You are going to be great!
Suzanne

[PretzelGirl]

I don't think this is a yes or no question. I do quite well when I go out. But on a bad day, I might dwell on a stare a little too long. If getting read becomes comments, there are many of us that could easily let it bother us. So it really depends on our mood and the situation.

[Karren H]

No... doesn't bother me one bit...

[Jilmac]

I've been read before and will most likely be read again and as long as I'm not harrassed, I couldn't care less what others say, think, or do to avoid me. I figure if others have a problem with me the way I am, they can all take a long walk off a short pier, and keep walking until their hat floats.

[TheMissus]

Nope, but, then again, I'm never trying to "pass" as someone or something I'm not Hon. ;):battingeyelashes::)

This seems very smart :)

Given many here are over six feet, lets face it, you WILL be read, as girls can be tall but we're usually not THAT tall. We also don't have Adam's Apples or large hands or feet. (Well, some might but I think these girls are rather rare going by the shoe sizes always left in stores, lol) Anyway, these are also natural giveaways that you can't exactly change by wearing makeup.

My gut feeling (and reading the answers in a thread I started a few pages ago) accepting you're a man crossdressing in public is surely healthier for your mental state than heading out with the hope you'll be seen as a woman. Unless you're transexual, I don't see the point in setting yourself up for such disappointment?

And for those called 'Sir' when dressed, the general public has no clue what a CD is doing or thinking so I doubt they are being disrespectful - they're just calling it as they see it. You can't blame them for their confusion. From what I read on this forum, most here are equally confused, if not more so!

[Leah Lynn]

Isha, it doesn't bother me anymore, in fact I get amused at the odd reactions. Friday night I was walking to a bar for a GNO, when I met some people coming towards me on the sidewalk. First was a young man, 20- something, and we just made eye contact and I smiled. He smiled and just walked on. Then there was an older couple, 60- something, and the lady gawked at me, as if she'd seen a creature never seen on earth before. The bar I was going to is next to a club that occasionally has drag shows. I smiled at her and said, "Would you like my autograph? I'm performing later tonight." Her husband gripped her arm and pulled her on their way. I was still laughing when I reached the bar. I hit a couple malls on Saturday and was read a few times, but other than a couple discreet looks, I got a couple smiles. I had lunch in a neat little Italian place and was treated as if I was a GG. I commented on another patron's shoes, and we talked for at least 20 minutes. I believe that our persona, ability to act like a woman, our confidence in being what we project, makes most people accept us. Some people though, just don't have the brain cells to act civil when meeting us.

Hugs,

Leah

[Marcelle]

Isha, it doesn't bother me anymore, in fact I get amused at the odd reactions . . . There was an older couple, 60- something, and the lady gawked at me, as if she'd seen a creature never seen on earth before.

Hi Leah,

I had a similar experience in the grocery store. A lot of people stared and I knew there was some snickering. Others walked on by oblivious to the world around them, guess they saw the long hair and dress and figured girl . . . move on. The oddest reaction was an elderly couple (60s) who just happened to be getting the same apples I needed for my pie. So I went up and began getting the apples, the look was interesting to say the least. I don't think they were being rude but more a product of their time . . . let's face a dude in dress with calf high boots must have seemed weird.

So I just smiled at both of them, not a sarcastic rude smile but a friendly smile. The wife looked away in absolute horror but the husband smiled slightly nodded and went back to his apples.

I have to admit, this was an interesting experience in up close and personal interaction with the world around me. Not daunted by the experience and in a way it was good to go through it.

Will I ever pass as a woman . . . not in a million years. I am just going to accept I am in a dude who likes to wear dresses and live with it (well at least this is my plan . . . still have a way to go to be truly comfortable with it).

Hugs

Isha

[Rogina B]

Unless you're transexual, I don't see the point in setting yourself up for such disappointment?


Everyone of us out and about in the mainstream world is EQUAL ! There is no outward way for an observer to know what "degree of T" a person is by observation! And that is the thing..being comfortable in your own skin" is the key to being comfortable out anywhere. So,they "clock you" who cares? Enjoy your celebrity status as it is something that not everybody has!

[Stark]

This thread got me curious about a phenomenon I've noticed as a trans male and I thought I would throw the question out to you ladies: do you find that women read you more easily than men do? It is incredibly frustrating to be passing in a group of men and then have a woman refer to me as "she." Invariably, it's the female store clerks, baristas, etc. who gender me female on the same days (and often in the same places) that the male ones gender me male. What is it that women pick up on that men don't? :/

[Princess Chantal]

Nope doesn't bother me at all, actually I hope that everybody reads me as a guy having so much fun with his crossdressing

[PattiAllison]

I used to be terrified about how people would react to seeing me dressed but I have finally gotten to where I just don't care what people think anymore. I feel that it is my right to be dressed as a woman and nobody can take that right away from me.

[NinaP]

Being read is just part of the fun. A "delayed read" reaction is often priceless. Some folks have been a bit brusque, perhaps, but I've never experienced severe rudeness or hateful attitudes.

But there are no guarantees, of course.

[ReineD]

Worse than being read however is being treated disrespectful.

Exactly.

I'll answer for my SO since she hasn't been here in years, but she is deeply hurt by being treated disrespectfully. This has only happened a few times though. Once or twice I caught people whispering and chortling behind her back but this does not happen often either, as far as I know. People who do this make me angry.

Still, my SO is human and she does not like to be read after she has put in so much effort in her physical transformation. It's disheartening. And I think it's disheartening because we all know there is a possibility that some people are presenting a neutral front when their thoughts are anything but.

BTW, everything that my SO feels, I feel. The way that people see us affects me too. So I guess I'm qualified to answer this thread in my own right.

This is what I and my SO do not mind: people who know that she is not a genetic female, but who still have conversations with her and kid around. My SO goes out enough to have gotten to know several people who work at the places that we frequent regularly. These people give the impression that not only do they NOT have a negative bias against genetic men who present as woman, they actually respect them and their choices.

[Rachel Morley]

So my question for you who go out (unless you pass 100 percent that is), does it bother you when you get read and if it does it ever dissipate the more you go out. Specifically, do you just get used to it and ignore the rude stares/giggles or learn to accept it as part of being.
Well, yes it is a disappointment when I get read but it doesn't bother me toomuch (not these says at least) unless the person's reaction is negative. If it's clear that they are offended or they are rude to me then I just want to get outa there soon. It's kind of weird, if I don't like being the center of attention (and I don't) then why would I go outside in the mainstream public dressed en femme? I don't know, I just have to to validate my self worth I guess.

[Eryn]

I've only had one instance where I was called "Sir" while dressed. It was a busboy in a coffee shop. I'm not going to get all bent out of shape over it.

I'm quite sure that others have also suspected that I was not a GG, but this doesn't mean that they were absolutely sure of my birth gender. There is always the chance that I might indeed be a tall GG handicapped by angular features, and most of the people I encounter act accordingly.

One thing I have learned is that one must show confidence. Tall, less than attractive, GGs don't worry about "passing." They are confident in what they are and I emulate this. For example, if I am shopping and another shopper gives me that "odd" look the instinctive CD response is to move away. I don't do this. I move closer and let them get as good of a look as they want. A GG wouldn't have anything to be ashamed of and neither do I.

[Destinë]

I've not yet been out while dressed, though I am dressing up to see the Rocky Horror Show, if that counts.
Reading this does make you think more about the stares disabled people get though. While we can opt to go out dressed or not, these people are disabled permanently.

[Nicole Erin]

Getting read means nothing. Happens to me often I imagine.
What bothers me is the rare negative reaction.
Just cause someone reads you does not mean they will react badly.

[sinderella]

1'st, I don't consider myself as "in drag" 2'nd I dress down or conservatively. When I'm out I own however I'm dressed and if people can't handle it, then I consider it to be their problem and not mine. I'm never "in their face", but if they choose to get in mine...then I stand my ground. (I can wield a mean heel if I have to lol). No, I don't mind getting "read".

[Michelle (Oz)]

So my question for you who go out (unless you pass 100 percent that is), does it bother you when you get read and if it does it ever dissipate the more you go out. Specifically, do you just get used to it and ignore the rude stares/giggles or learn to accept it as part of being.
Yes, it gets much easier the more you go out ... but in more than one way.

You realise that it is not all about 'me' - people are more likely to be laughing at something unrelated to 'me' but we just think it is about 'me' because we are self conscious.

Technique improves with practice to make 'maleness' less obvious to a casual observer. Walking, makeup, mannerisms - the whole package.

But mostly it is having the confidence to know that you will be read and not be concerned. Smile a lot - look happy. People react to whether you are confident or a deer in headlights. If I get 'the look' I just smile at them as if to say 'yep, you read me but I'm having a ball'.

And there is a good deal of upside to being read. Staff at so many stores, hotels, airlines, cafes, etc know me and recognise me. Delightful service and friendships formed.

Relax, practice and enjoy!!

[Terri Andrews]

I have enjoyed the comments on this post,since this is a subject that I worry about way to much.
I am out 3 or 4 days a week and there are few things that I have not experenced as a Woman who is out and about.
I think that most are to busy with there lives to pay attention to me as long as I am dressed to blend in
,but having said that I am sure that I have been read at times but I continue to enjoy my life and not let the small minded comments of others ruin it for me..

[julie w]

I have had women talk to me in stores and I know they have no idea I am cross gendered , then someone else gives me a second look ,I have put it down to, if they know anything about transgender or like checking people out like my SO does there's a good chance they will read you ,you can,t let it bother you if you want to go out mainstream

[Anne2345]

Getting read? No. It does not bother me in the least. It used to think it matters, and I was deathly afraid of it. But unless you have unwittingly placed yourself in an ill-advised position, it doesn't matter. The fact of the matter is that most people are too involved in their own shit to even notice or care. And in the end, who are they to control what you do? You are not hurting them in any tangible manner whatsoever. In my own experience I have run the gamut from incredibly nice, compassionate people to complete douchebag jackasses. In the end, if it's important enough to you, you gotta be you, and you will find a way to make it work.

[*Maya*]

It doesnt bother me getting read, I welcome it and expect it, but I cant tell for sure when it happens... it can be bit more uncomfortable in instances where people didnt read you at first but after a little more interaction suddenly it hits them... most of the time its fine, but sometimes its not :)

[vikki2020]

Getting read means nothing. Happens to me often I imagine.
What bothers me is the rare negative reaction.
Just cause someone reads you does not mean they will react badly.

yeah. You stay positive, and the reaction almost always will be the same. Own it, and good things happen!

[ShriekCassandra]

I don't even like being looked at when I'm out and about as an everyday male so I would be very self conscious in regards to not being convincing enough and drawing unwanted glares and attention to myself.

[BWOemerger]

One of my most memorable outings (good) was getting read. I was in a Freddy's and a lady employee came up to me and ask if she could help me shortly after I responded "No Thanks" I could see it hit her. It made me feel pretty good that I got away with it for that long and through that kind of interaction. Really helped with my confidence.

[Brooklyn]

You are a performer, and people usually take their cues on how to react from you. Like Eryn said, if you project confidence, look like you're having a fab day, and talk to people, they usually will have a positive reaction - even though you get clocked. If you act all shy and withdrawn, avoid eye-contact, and so on, you'll get much worse results. Many of us don't have tons of natural confidence after living in shame and confusion for years, so fake it 'til you make it. Happy Thanksgiving!

[Phydelia]

i can't speak to whether it gets better or not, but personally it bothers me a *lot*... the one time i went out dressed in a public vanilla setting, the stares (not even negative/hostile reactions) nearly sent me running back to my hotel in tears.

[MissTee]

I don't go out because it would bother me greatly to be read.

[Launa]

I can't pass either so I just look my best and that's just going to have to do. When people stare too long, I usually stare back for a bit. Whatever

[Khaleesi81]

Nah, doesn't bother me unless its someone I know! (Not happened yet!)

I've been read enough times, was approached by a makeup girl selling stuff last time asking if I liked makeup! She was friendly though, and had a nice chat. I genuinely think young people round here aren't bothered. Shop assistants have been helpful and professional, I've assumed they're read me, but when they say 'lovely to have met you' I like to think that I've done a little bit for our community in how we're perceived.

[Lexi Moralas]

I make a point of planing my outing to places where I will never bump it to some one I know.
I pass fairly well most of the time as far as I can tell anyway unless I have to interact with some one for more the a couple of seconds. But I care less and less if I get read because I will never see these people again and they don't impact my real life so I am not going to let anyone rain on my parade. In the words of Dale carnage. Figure out the worst thing that could happen, accept it , then try to improve on that. So I only dress in situation that anyone who dose read me will never affect my real life. That reduces my stress and fear over being read so I can enjoy my girl time. My experience so far is most people don't notice , or don't care. And I'm don't let a few comments, snickers, or disapproving look ruin thing for me.

[Judith96a]

So I just smiled at both of them, not a sarcastic rude smile but a friendly smile. The wife looked away in absolute horror but the husband smiled slightly nodded and went back to his apples.



Isha,
I had something similar happen years ago - totally read by an elderly 'old soldier' type, I smiled as sweetly as I could and he behaved like the absolute gentleman that he was - opened the train carriage door for me etc. as if I had been a GG. He wasn't fooled for a second. I doubt if he approved but...!

As for caring about getting read, the longer I CD the less it bothers me, so long as everyone behaves!

[Ciara Brianne]

Not entirely. I would prefer not to get read, however, if I go out en femme I have to accept that possibility. Some people can really bring you down with their rude comments, their stares and such...if you let them. It is unfortunate that our society isn't more open minded. As I learned long ago, not everyone will accept and like who you are. One has to be ok with that and be accepting and happy with who they are.

Ciara

[jessiejess112]

Very interesting thread, I've never been out dressed, but have thought about it a lot. It is very informative for me to read this, thanks for sharing your positive as well as negative, experiences.

[miss_jessie]

Getting read would really bother me. It's the primary reason for me not going out ever yet - it really would play on my paranoia. I don't want to be seen as a man in a dress, but a woman. This is where I struggle internally as I don't want to be a woman so why should I care about being read? I don't know the answer to that, I just know that I do fear it.

[joanna4]

You went out and had a safe experience. I'm glad you enjoyed it. I've been read upclose so many times when I was out. I remember good and bad experiences but I've always made it home. Enjoy the experience and yes, you probably will be the talk of the dinner lol.

[susangirl]

Yes it bothers me but that's ok. I dress for myself. I look at it this way. As long as I get read then I have work to do. I don't want to be a woman in real live but when I'm dressed as Susan I want to look and act the part. It a challenge and a Damm hard one. I have made great improvements. My walk is said by many to be better than a lot of women's. The arms and up boddy are tough to get right. The best thing I could do is loose 30 40 lbs. Dressing up is just so Damm fun. I do only dress out of town.

[JamieQ]

Not really bothered anymore by being read. I suppose we get used to it after a while. I have never had any verbal comment, disapproving facial expression, or even a stare that I am aware of...but I am sure I was read many many times...most people in public do not care... yes, it does dissipate as you go out more. Any one of the three listed above could happen my next time out....who knows...

[Pinky188]

I have learned to have thick skin! You have to in our world! I mean, come on! We are all a bunch of trannys! You can't let things like being clocled bother you! Just keep it moving girl!

[Lynn Marie]

If you're going, and getting read, and that bothers you, then why are you going out?

[Marcelle]

Wow . . . when I started this thread, I had no idea it would garner so many responses . . . Thanks all for your shared experiences and thoughts to date.

Yes, as I go out more I am slowly getting used to the stares. But I have noticed (now that I look up and out vice down at my feet :)) that most people don't even look if you just act naturally. Don't get me wrong, when people look or I interact, they know immediately but for the most part my interactions have been positive.

The other thing I noticed is that the stares are more "curiosity" than "rude" (albeit there have been a few rude ones). I think curiosity is to be expected as it is not everyday that most people see a CDer up close.

As far as not getting read, I gave up and just try to blend. If I get read (rude stare or curious) I smile now and go on with my business. The one good thing is to date nobody has yelled out "HEY TRANNY IN THE BUIDLING GET THE TORCHES!" :battingeyelashes:

Hugs

Isha