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I Am Paula
10-15-2013, 09:04 AM
It was only six months ago that I compiled my list of people to come out to, in which order, and how. I ended up with a list of over three hundred, and broke them down into- family, social, business, and other. Then I sub-grouped them into- email, in person, just show up.
I felt that the coming out process was one of the most important of transition. Real women don't live in fear of being seen by aquaintances, or refuse invitations because of their gender status.
I also got VERY tired of presenting male just to keep a few happy. This is my life, not theirs!

Yesterday morning my friend Dan came over for coffee. Paula answered the door, and greeted him. We had a wonderful time catching up on the past year. As usual, there was some conversation about my change in presentation, and, as usual it ended in 'Congratulations' and 'That must take courage'.
When he left, I crossed his name off my list. The last one!

The score- Overwhelming acceptance, and joy that I was following my destiny- 100%
Non acceptance, loss of friends, scorn or bigotry- 0 %

Conclusion- I certainly cannot speak for everybody. My family is very close, and accepting of everybody. I knew I had no problems there, but it took some serious courage to come out to them. It ended up almost a non event, as they have all welcomed Paula to the family.
My friends, and business contacts are, almost universally, involved in the arts, and used to being with the lunatic fringe. We are an accepting bunch of misfits, gays, one-offs, and genius/madmen. I can't say what it would be like if my friends were 'normal'. My business contacts are people who cater to the above- musical instrument dealers, and repairmen, sound companies and contractors, venue owners, and booking agents. They have very thick skin from dealing with said lunatics.

The next chapter- although I have not been ignoring it, I enter the vanity stage. I am compiling my list of things to do, to, and for, ME. Some minor surgeries, and dental work, finish with beard etc. I love lists!

Coming out is such a major concern to most girls. I hope my positive experience helps a few gain the courage needed to do it.

kimdl93
10-15-2013, 09:28 AM
I do admire the methodical manner you used to identify, categorize and come out to over three hundred people! Wow, that is an undertaking. But what impresses me more is the response of friends, family and business associates alike. What a great way to conclude the process, having coffee with and old friend and ending with a congratulation and admiration for your courage. Everyone's circle of associations is different, but yours sounds really great. I'm glad you had the courage to come to them.

Now you can get on with the fun stuff

Marleena
10-15-2013, 09:38 AM
Congrats Paula! Yours is a situation that all of us hope for. Three hundred friends and contacts? Just wow!

thechic
10-15-2013, 12:44 PM
My god your so organised , when I came out I just came out . i think I told 20 people before coming out though.

survivor
10-15-2013, 12:56 PM
Way to go tgirlceleste,
I wish the process was as easy and positive for everyone that has to go through this. The world would be a happier place! Good luck and enjoy.
BTW, I just started reading a book called, "Celeste". Love the name.

I Am Paula
10-15-2013, 04:25 PM
"BTW, I just started reading a book called, "Celeste". Love the name."
I'm still working with the mods to find a working name. My real name is Paula, and Celeste is an old internet name from the text only days of the web. But thank you, it has served me well.

Angela Campbell
10-15-2013, 05:04 PM
300 people!! Wow I do not think I could make a list of 300 people of whom I know their name, much less call a friend or acquaintance....even if I kept it to 20 or so there would be a lot like....that lady at the grocery store, my moms neighbor, one of my sons friends.....That bald guy across the street, the UPS guy, I do not know many people. Never had friends, and kind of keep to myself. (then again I do have a lot of TG and TS friends but I didn't need to come out to them)


I guess I have told everyone in my life, except for a few at work (and there is a plan in the works for that). so that is..... so far ....8

no really bad cases of non acceptance except one and she has since apologized (ex wife). One is worried for my soul (an aunt), and the rest are pretty ok with it. All say they still love me.

I would feel pretty special if there were 300 people who even knew who I am at all.

Leah Lynn
10-15-2013, 07:55 PM
That is so cool, Paula. Of all the people I have known in my lifetime, I doubt I could remember 300 names.

Leah