Is CDing like a drug addiction?

[Katie Russell]

I have read number of posts on this forum and there does seem to be a common thread. It seems that most of us start at a young age with a fascination for female clothes.

Then through our teenage years we then 'borrow' clothes from a female relatives. This normally give us some sexual gratification.

We then progress to buying our own clothes, make up, wigs, forms and finally going out in public.

Each stage is a progression from the last and each stage becomes more thrilling than the last.

I know how my heart raced when I bought my first item of women's clothing. And I know that each time I go shopping I get the same buzz.

I've read thread about girls who've gone out in pubic for the first time and how it makes them feel. I know that I fantasise about it.

Is this buzz the reason why we CD? Is there something released in our brains that stimulates us to go further each time? Like drug addicts once we've reached a certain level we need to go further for that extra high.

Do we need to CD to release this chemical? Is that what makes us feel so good? Lots of you say how relaxed you feel after CDing.

I've read posts for girls who've purged (gone cold turkey) and like an addiction have gone back to it.

If we dressed as a woman full time do we lose that buzz once it becomes mundane. I don't know but I think the reason we keep pushing the boundaries is to keep getting that adrenaline hit.

I've never been able to find any research on the web that explains why we CD. It only really vaguely mentions about how our brains are wired but never that we are adrenalin junkies.

If anyone has any thoughts on the subject I'd be interested to know.

Katie.

[Karren H]

No.... You can be a recovering drug addict.... you can never recover from this.....

[Dianne S]

No.... You can be a recovering drug addict.... you can never recover from this.....

Hah! :) Too true.

CDing is addictive, but the activity itself is far less harmful to your health than most drugs... so it's a relatively harmless addiction.

I do think the desire increases as one gets older as part of a feedback loop. Our brains are plastic and adjust to reinforce the desire to do things we already like to do.

[Katie Russell]

Hi Karren

It can still be an addiction that we keep having to feed by going further and further. Are there any recovering CDers? I don't have any experience of drug addicts but I know plenty of ex-smokers who are one cigarette away from starting again. Is CDing psychological or physiological or a combination of the two?

Katie

[Robbin_Sinclair]

.........Each stage is a progression from the last and each stage becomes more thrilling than the last....Is there something released in our brains that stimulates us to go further each time? Like drug addicts once we've reached a certain level we need to go further for that extra high.....Do we need to CD to release this chemical? .... I've never been able to find any research on the web that explains why we CD....Katie.

From my empirical studies (drug addicted and now 12 stepper), nothing is thrilling about that last hit with dope. You know you shouldn't have it but you know you have to have it. It sucks.

Does it release a chemical? Probably but who really knows? It does reinforce a positive feeling for me. I can let it become a sexual thing but I try to avoid that.

For me, the thrill of just putting on a favorite comfortable skirt and top, preferably made from scratch in my studio is enough. If I had companionship to got out to a place in a tolerant location, I can hold my own with the make up, pantyhose and high heels.

Otherwise it's ballet slippers and a positive fem attitude, reinforced by meditation. Ever notice how feminine some Buddhist icons can look? That's where I want to be.

namaste :hugs: rbbn

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Katie, Karen nailed it on this one.

[Cynthia Anne]

I never thought I was addicted to anything! Now you tell me that I am! And wouldn't you know it! It's something that there's no cure for! Just my luck!:brolleyes:

[Lexi Moralas]

This I tough question

[sometimes_miss]

No.... You can be a recovering drug addict.... you can never recover from this.....
Many drug and alcohol addicts never really recover either; they're simply addicts that don't indulge their addiction TODAY. We take it one day at a time. So, recover from crossdressing, well, some of us, we sort of can. But it's not easy. It's as simple as admitting that I want to, but won't do it.....today. Fortunately, I've found that I can usually get by as long as I have some sort of source of physical affection; whether free, or paid for, doesn't matter. I'm going on five months with no CDing. Watch this space for updates. I have days where I really really really really want to, and not doing so takes all my strength; keeping my 'stash' in a storage unit helps, as it will take a lot to go there, park, go up a flight of stairs, open up the sliding door and then dig through everything to get exactly what I want. By not 'purging', I don't buy anything new, as I already own virtually everything I want. It's like wanting anything else; just do something to keep your mind busy on something else, keep busy, tell yourself if you really really need to, you'll do it tomorrow. Then see how you feel in the morning. Remind yourself that no one ever died from not crossdressing for a day, and you'll realize how irrational the need for immediate gratification of this desire really is. For all of you hoping to quit, try this. It's not easy. But I think it can be done.

[Lori Kurtz]

For me, CDing was definitely like a drug addiction. It was a high, a rush, and I have no doubt that there were measurable physiological and chemical changes in my body when I would do it. The pounding of my heart, the butterflies in my stomach ... it was a powerful and wonderful feeling. It always culminated in sexual satisfaction, which in itself, as we all know, involves releases of pleasure-related chemicals. CDing was such a powerful urge, in an addiction-similar way, that it made me take foolish risks sometimes, and it cost me a marriage. There was shame and guilt involved with it, and yet I did it anyway. The excitement about the whole thing is part of why I'm here now, even though I don't dress up anymore. And if I could be the shapely, sexy, young babe I used to enjoy becoming, I'd probably do it today. Another reason why I'm here now, though, is to help deal with those feelings of shame and guilt. It helps to hear from others who have gone through similar things to what I have gone through, or who experience other variations of the CD/TS spectrum, and to be in an environment that is compassionate and accepting of things that many people have a hard time with.

[linda allen]

Crossdressing is not an addiction. There's no chemical dependence like there is with drugs, cigatettes or alcohol. It's something you like to do, similar to playing golf, fishing, etc. Some folks take it to extremes just as some folks do with other activities.

[Katie Russell]

Hi Linda

I'm not sure CDing can be equated to other pastimes such as golf or fishing. I used to play football but I never had the same compulsion to go out and play football as I do with CDing. I think the dependency comes from the feeling it give us and the need to keep having that feeling. There are adrenaline junkies who keep pushing the limits as many CDers do.

I think that there is some mileage in the way are brains are wired that we have the desire to express the feminine side of our personalities but the pushing of the boundaries is to do with the way it makes us feel. We need to keep pushing the boundaries as we get immune to the way we feel (dressing is not enough I now need to get out). May be we can reach a point where we have a happy balance but reading how many girls rush ahead once they got the green light from their SO is amazing. The 'pink fog' is not rational so there must be other reasons behind it.

Katie

[Sarah Beth]

The thought that I might be addicted to cross dressing brought out the researcher in me, naturally I had to act upon the idea. So I went to look up what addiction was. According to Psychology Today “Addiction is a condition that results when a person ingests a substance (alcohol, cocaine, nicotine) or engages in an activity (gambling) that can be pleasurable but the continued use of which becomes compulsive and interferes with ordinary life responsibilities, such as work or relationships, or health. Users may not be aware that their behavior is out of control and causing problems for themselves and others Well I certainly am not ingesting anything but I am engaging in an activity that I do find pleasurable. I can’t say that at times my cross dressing doesn’t interfere somewhat in my life responsibilities. Sometimes I have had to make a decision between putting in that next nail or adjusting my bra strap. It has in the past most certainly affected my relationship with my wife and could do the same currently with others around me, but as far as I know currently isn't. My cross dressing isnt' out of control, at least I don't think so. Myabe it is and I'm just not aware of it. So then I have to ask, as the defintion says, have gone in to that compulsive stage?

So what then is a compulsion? Watch out here comes the definition “a strong, usually irresistible impulse to perform an act, especially one that is irrational or contrary to one’s will.” Is that true of me? At times maybe it is, because sometimes I just can't help slipping into something feminine, like right now in my bra, panties, stockings, skirt and top. I got up this morning and just had to slip out of my nighty and into something comfortable to do my book work in. (yes you found me out I am certainly not doing my book work). Honestly, however, other than the fact that some folks out there might find my doing so irrational I don’t, well at least not completely, and certainly how I'm dressed right now isn’t against my will. I have enough will power not to do it, just like I found the will power to not smoke anymore. See I do know what it’s like to have an addiction. Its not irresistable, I mean I could have resisted getting dressed as I am right now but I just didn't want to. I mean I didn't want to ressit, really its not that I couldn't resist I just didn't want ot.

There was another thought in my mind about this point and that was is my dressing an obsession. After all don't obsessive and compulsive go hand in had? If you haven’t figured it out by now, I have to look up definitions so I am sure of my footing. It’s like trying out some new heels how are they are going to feel when you get your feet on the ground, are they going to be stable enough to walk in? Well then obsession is “domination of one’s thoughts or feelings by a persistent idea, image, desire,etc..” After asking myself was this true of me I answered well not it isn’t. The mere fact that yesterday while hanging perilously off the peak of a very steep roof I was not thinking at all, about cross dressing, nor did I have any image in my head of anything remotely related to being in a dress or a bra or panties. Well that is until I saw that woman across the street in that really cute skirt and got to wondering where she got it and what I would look like in it. To say nothing of her shoes and that sweet looking jacket she had on. No there is no persistance at all the images I have in my head of things feminine.

After much thought, and process I then have come to the conclusion that, even though I am in denial and if anyone on the street askes me if I am a cross dresser I'm going to deny it, I am an obsessive, compulsive personality, addicted to cross dressing. However, all in the mild form, I mean I am not ready for a long stint in rehab just yet. Or is it just that I am in denial?

[Chickhe]

I don't think it is CDing that is addicting. I think it is the defense mechanism that many build up to protect their ego that turns in to a cycle of repression and release. The stress builds up adrenaline and that gives you a bit of a high and then there is a some reduced happiness as things go back to normal. If you can get past all inner turmoil and accept yourself, it turns out that there is less swing in your emotions and CDing is just like any other hobby. I've experienced this myself.

[Trishpdxcd2]

I am not sure about addicting, but there is probably a chemical base for it. I know I feel that rush of euphoria when I dress and I am guessing that is a release of dopamine...

[Wildaboutheels]

MALE Orgasms and the ease with which most men can have them are what keep Humans on the planet. Of course they are addictive. Females simply provide the eggs and Os for them are pretty much irrelevant to the equation.

Female clothing is normally an AID to Os for probably 99% of all male CDers. [at least at some point in their journey] The math is simple here and undeniable.

We are NOT talking granny dresses and flats which is why you won't find hookers wearing them or pics of such in the photo gallery.

A good # at this Forum felt guilt or shame at some point obviously, which likely prompted many to move on to/into "full" dressing and away from Os especially as they aged.

[dominique]

I agree with Katie that there's got to be something chemical in our make up (no pun intended) that wants us to go that bit further and never loose that feeling. When I've stopped dressing for a while I can feel my self getting on edge and thinking constantly of being dressed. But I stopped for a while this time last year until about March/ April time. I had something to concentrate on, I could've done the tasks dressed but didn't want to. Then another period of no dressing but this was different as I didn't feel up tight and nervy about it. One more of the many complex reasons behind crossdressing to be solved.

[Beverley Sims]

No.... You can be a recovering drug addict.... you can never recover from this.....
In addition this has no lasting health effects.

[Debra Russell]

If cd is addictive - I've been an addicted from age 3 ..............:):D.................Debra

[Stephanie47]

I don't believe CDing is like a drug addiction. I think the progression is due to inching forward slowly because we have been conditioned to think we are doing something abnormal, immoral, against societal mores and expectations, against Biblical teachings.

I have read many many posts on this forum that mirror my journey. Yep, deny the guy the opportunity for self expression and his actions become like a person denied some drug. He waits for a crumb of time to become available so he may dress for ten minutes. Or he risks discovery by underdressing for an hour. Yep, looks like an addition. However, given the opportunity to dress whenever the need arises, he mellows out. At least I do. I know I can dress whenever the needs arises. I no longer "sneak" a crumb of time.

[Jenniferathome]

It is not an addiction any more than breathing is. Drug addicts are not "born" they are made. Cross dressers are born. Moreover, cross dressing causes no harmful physiological affects. While there may be truth to the "buzz" or more likely and endorphin rush, one can get that from strenuous exercise. A drug buzz is purely pharmacological.

[Dianne S]

Moreover, cross dressing causes no harmful physiological affects.

Yes. If crossdressing does become a problem by consuming too much of your time/energy/finances, then I'd call it more of an obsession or compulsion than an addiction.

[Bootsiegalore]

No.... You can be a recovering drug addict.... you can never recover from this.....

I completely agree! This is terminal!!!!

[Christina Kay]

I think Iam genetically predisposed, to this compulsiveness . Hugs

[windycissy]

No question about it – the rush from dressing can be addictive. Even the thought of dressing releases endorphins and dopamine resulting in a feeling of euphoria, which is why I can’t kick it. One thing I learned from this thread is when a behavior like gambling interferes with everyday life, it can become a compulsive addiction, as opposed to a harmless addiction or even a positive one - for example the rush I get from running, which also causes a natural high. So the key seems to be self-control: if you dress because you like the way it makes you feel, and it doesn’t screw up your life, it’s wonderful, but if you lose that self-control it can hurt you and the ones you love. Fascinating topic!

[katssun]

I would say that the thrill of doing it is addicting for a while.

The rush of endorphins:
- When I first made breasts out of socks and stuffed them up my shirt.
- When I first "borrowed" clothes.
- When I first "borrowed" knee-high boots.
- When I first "borrowed" a one-piece swimsuit and put socks in it.
- When I made my first forms from 12" balloons filled just enough with water.
- When I ordered my first bra online, then again when I filled it with balloons.
- When I tucked for the first time.
- When I finally got a proper pair of breastforms and used them the first few times.
- The first time I shaved my legs and chest completely.
- The first time I used self-adhesive breastforms.
- The first time I wore a wig...

And so on. But the strange thing was, the more often I did it, the further the thrill went away. As it began to become a regular thing, there was no sexual thrill anymore. I was just being my other half for the first time.

It's only addicting if you make it addictive. Otherwise you're just becoming who you really are.

[reb.femme]

I don't know if this is a compulsion, but sometimes it can feel like it. I often get a knot in my stomach, to the effect that if I don't dress, I'll explode. Equally though, the urge disappears out of my life for a time and I wonder where it went. So it’s different from an addiction in that respect.

The drug is the feel of the clothes and the slightly milder me that it produces. I love the release it affords, but I just enjoy being femme to be honest and can only offer that by way of explanation.

My femme side does like to push the boundaries a little, but I don't suffer with the pink fog, although like you, I get a buzz from buying my girl clothes. Maybe we do become slightly immune to our current situation, but I think I'm as near to the edge of my development as I can be in this life. I have to respect my wife's wishes on not outing myself in our local area and to her work colleagues.

Rebecca

[Tina_gm]

I can't say that it feels like an addiction to me. I can go days without dressing and the desires are not overwhelming. I think that it gets to a certain point and just stays there until I do dress. I am perhaps a little different then many here??... but it is a very comfortable relaxing feeling for me to dress. Not really a true rush that I feel. I do get the desire stronger at times than others, that doesn't always correlate to time not dressed.

[xdressed]

It is not an addiction any more than breathing is. Dug addicts are not "born" they are made. Cross dressers are born. Moreover, cross dressing causes no harmful physiological affects. While there may be truth to the "buzz" or more likely and endorphin rush, one can get that from strenuous exercise. A drug buzz is purely pharmacological.

This ^

You can't be addicted to fundamental parts of yourself.


Yes. If crossdressing does become a problem by consuming too much of your time/energy/finances, then I'd call it more of an obsession or compulsion than an addiction.

I think this is mostly a reaction to the social stigma around crossdressing, perceived or otherwise. If you're guilt free and in an environment where everyone is totally accepting then crossdressing causes no direct harmful effects

[ArleneRaquel]

Karren is 100% correct. Crissy is right in regard to losing control.

[Michelle (Oz)]

No question about it – the rush from dressing can be addictive. Even the thought of dressing releases endorphins and dopamine resulting in a feeling of euphoria, which is why I can’t kick it. One thing I learned from this thread is when a behavior like gambling interferes with everyday life, it can become a compulsive addiction, as opposed to a harmless addiction or even a positive one [...] which causes a natural high.
Slightly modified I'll go with this. Addictive perhaps but no physical or psychological harm ... thankfully!! Now just a high from life.

[Dani0948]

Perhaps not an addiction, but more like reading your favorite type of literature or watching you favorite tv program. I've never really fealt compelled to dress, but like a good book I really enjoy reading SF. Of course it's even better if I'm dressed while reading.

[Bridgetlagurl]

Cool thought. Never had any drug addictions other than booze pot sex and cigarettes, so don't really have anything to compare it too?:heehee:

[Audrey34]

Addiction? No, if anything else it can become an obsession. I was always worried about spending too much time as Audrey. But the reality is I don't. In fact, my therapist believes I should dress more often when I'm home. Maybe I'm not completely free of the guilt that comes with this. I always have fun but usually feel pretty crappy the next day when I'm not dressed.
-Audrey

[Charmane]

People toss around the word addiction like its a cute label to any quirk. On the other hand, I do feel addicted to crossdressing because its part of who I am. I can't make it go away....yet everyone else says its evil...I mean evil forbidden. So the feelings of using a drug or a taboo and enjoying it...followed by a crash of guilt or fear. Ya it feels like I'm an addict.

[NathalieX66]

Ask yourself what particular hole you are trying to fill within our own soul.

As for me, I wanted to dress female since age 6....don't know why, just is.

[ArleneRaquel]

To me CD'ing is a must, but in no way an addiction. During my marriage I went weeks & weeks without dressing enfemme, not even underdressing. Since that age of 8, or so, I knew that sometime in my adult life I would live as a female 24/7.

[jodie k]

if crossdressing is an addiction, are forums like this, pushers????:brolleyes

jodie

[CarlaWestin]

If CD were an addiction, I'd be out at night striping abandoned building of their copper pipes to buy make-up.

[Robbin_Sinclair]

I hate seeing terms like "guilt" and "shame" used. Sure people may have but if they do, they should not.

Perhaps, that's what this site is all about. Our feelings are there. They might be ridiculed by the people who don't feel this way but we should not have guilt or shame. If it doesn't interfere with others, all of the harm in crossdressing is how we feel.

If it good, good. If it is bad, do something about it.

I do feel frustrated sometimes but I deal with it using the same approach as my other addictions. I eliminate some (the dope and alcohol) but keep others (coffee and dressing). It works for me, especially when combining it with the basic tenets of Buddhism (impermanence and nonself).

:hugs: robbin

[daviolin]

Oh what a beautiful addiction. Not harmful to your health, a stress reliever and just down right fun. What more could you want. Example of my addiction: I advanced all the way to full dress and make-up and going out for girly fun. I guess I must have regressed in my habit. I prefer to stay home and dress and rarely use make-up anymore. I'm happy as a hog in mud with my leveling out. Daviolin

[linda allen]

Crossdressers are not born. In the womb, we know nothing about clothing, male or female. Once we are born, adults put clothing on us. That's our first experience or knowlege of clothing. Our DNA contains no information regarding clothing.

Our desire to crossdress comes from life experiences. Experiences like our mothers wishing we had been born female and expressing those wishes, dressing us in female clothing when we were young, showing favoritism to female siblings or nieces, etc. Or possibly people commenting on how cute we were, we should have been born a girl.

Other factors might be feeling inadequate as a boy in sports or other physical activities and noticing that girls don't have to be good at those things so it's easier to be a girl.

I don't think most of us know why we crossdress and I don't think there's anyone on this forum qualified to tell us why. We just do it. We may make up reasons or excuses, but we don't really know.

Saying crossdressing is an addiction or saying that it's impossible to stop are just excuses to continue dressing. One can stop if one wants to, just simply don't put on the panties, bra, etc.

I'm not trying to convince anyone to stop crossdressing, I crossdress and plan on continuing to do so when appropriate. I'm just tired of hearing all the excuses. It's your body and you should have the willpower to be in control of it.

[Kate Simmons]

As with many things, it honestly depends on the individual person if it is addictive or not.:)

[Penny2325]

I think it is addictive but its not bad. Now, if you are literally going broke because you cannot stop buying clothes, wigs, makeup, etc, then it may be problematic but that would be more of a buying addiction than a CD addiction.

[Robin777]

I cannot say if it is addictive or not, but it is like a drug. I believe it provides a high like drugs and alcohol do. It depends on the person if they get addicted or for a better description become dependent on it like an alcoholic. At least this doesn't screw your body up like drugs and alcohol do. You end up spending money,instead of buying drugs or alcohol you spend it on clothes.At least with this you have something to show for it in the end. :)

[Jenniferpl]

The more I crossdress the more I want to crossdress. Most of us are probably addicted to shopping.

After giving this more serious thought, there are some striking similarities'. Both have the power to destroy people lives. Also numerous marriages and relationships have been torn apart. One particular trait both have in common is lying and denial. Sneaking around also comes to mind.

The major difference is behavior. The behavior of a person on drugs is unpredictable at best. Many innocent individuals have been injured by someone on drugs. Many of us on this site frequently mention crossdressing having a relaxing calming effect on them.

[Katie Russell]

Thanks for all the replies.

On reflection I think that may be the comparison to drug addiction was the wrong way of expressing my thoughts. As some of you mentioned it may well be more akin to a gambling addiction where there is no artificial substances involved. I'm guessing that the natural high produced from a win is what makes it addictive.

I was trying to decide is the high from dressing made it addictive and that to continue getting the same high we needed to keep getting more adventurous. Alternatively the reason we continue the journey from borrowing female relatives attire to buying our own clothes etc is purely economic. As we get older we are able to afford our own clothes and decide to explore this side of our personalities with extra money we have at our disposal.

From the responses there does seem to be some psychological advantage in dressing as it does prompt a feeling of well being and there is an excitement in buying new clothes, going out in public which may account for some of the behaviour. May be it is a combination of many factors. From the response there seem to many and varied answers.

Katie

[Robbin_Sinclair]

.... One particular trait both have in common is lying and denial. Sneaking around also comes to mind.......

One more little point, bringing me up to date. In AA there's a thing like Catholic confession called "5th Step." In that you relay to yourself, your god and one other human being all the things that you think could qualify as a "wrong". (AA uses old fashion terminology)

My human being and I define a wrong as anything that is uncomfortable for me, i.e., that bother me. Lies bother me. So shared the CD experience with a rather manly male AAer who verges on being a sexist. He seldom asked questions. As I should have expected, it was no big deal.

His face contorted far more when I told him how I treated my ex-wife in the '80s. Point being, lies are bad and we CDers handle it by downplaying what we do. Most of us don't go outside and if we do, it is with the "girls' -- strength in numbers. Generally we stay at home and hurt no one. Our most difficult lies are to the people we love in our home.

Thanks for the summary Katie Russell. Well said.

:hugs: Happy Day All, xxrbbn

[hosierylover]

Crossdressing is not an addiction. There's no chemical dependence like there is with drugs, cigatettes or alcohol. It's something you like to do, similar to playing golf, fishing, etc. Some folks take it to extremes just as some folks do with other activities.



Hi Linda, I can't fully agree with you there, CDing to me as well as a lot of others is totally additive, if I don't do it I get moody and frustrated, I also am a relapsing heavy drug user that went clean for seven years of marriage and when that fell apart in February, I went straight back to drugs, I also purged, since I was now living with a mate and his wife( I had the whole top story), but two days latter I was trying to find all my stuff again(but no good), so I just made do buying new pair blk tights, but the urge got stronger and I came out to my mates wife, who loved it and cos we were the same size she said I had full access to all her shoes and clothing,
Months later house of my own again, I am buying stuff to dress up each week, I just can't stop and it's getting stronger, I have found out that after coming out to one person it gets easier to tell people and it's such a buzz talking about it,
I wear hosiery everyday and I just can't stop and I LOVE IT

[ReineD]

It's different for everyone, isn't it.

It's clear that it does start off sexually for the vast majority of CDers and a lot of people here say that the CDing brings with it feelings of euphoria, or thrill, or a high, or elevated feelings of some sort ... or any other way you want to put it. So yes, these elevated feelings do release chemicals in the brain that relate to pleasure, and these are the same chemicals that are released in people who have addictions to drugs or alcohol, or are compulsive with behaviors like watching porn or sexual addictions, or gambling, shopping, etc. Also, our sexual awareness of what feels good to our bodies is present at very early ages, so it can be sexual even if a CDer was aware at age 8 that he enjoyed wearing feminine things, although the full impact of ejaculation will obviously not occur until pubescent age.

It's also true that it becomes a problem when it has a negative impact in other life areas.

BUT ... It is also true that the compulsion morphs over time and it does become a need. This is why there are so many different answers in this thread. Everyone is at a different stage. I take it though, that the CDers for whom it is still a sexual thrill tend to be on average younger than the CDers for whom it has morphed into feelings of comfort, although admittedly everyone has a different libido. There seems to be an increased need to dress that is not sexual, for crossdressers approaching middle age or older.

To those of you who say it is epigenetic in utero, I believe this can also be true but I expect it is in the minority.

==================================

To anyone who is interested in the physical reactions to the CDing, i.e. the brain chemicals released, here is a series of six videos on what happens to the brain during addiction of either substances or behaviors.

This particular video series is based on porn addiction, but you can substitute the thrills related to the CDing for the purpose of observing the physiological results:

http://yourbrainonporn.com/your-brain-on-porn-series

NOTE: I am not comparing the need to crossdress to porn addiction. I am providing a link to the best series of videos that I have seen on the physical reactions to thrill inducing behaviors.

[Taylor Ray]

Lots of insightful replies here; love all the honesty. For me this topic reminds me of experiences some of my gay friends have had. When closeted, they felt like they were doing something "wrong", and they would perhaps fall into the trap of using the word "addiction'. Once coming out, all of that stuff fell away.

So, from a semantic perspective, perhaps the word "addiction" (and many of the models based upon the word) is too tied with something that is inherently negative or wrong. For me, once I fully embraced that I enjoy wearing women's clothing, all of those words and feelings of shame fell away.

At this point, I view clothes as being clothes. We wouldn't say that a man was "addicted" to wearing "guy clothes". The gender duality in regard to clothing is a social norm. I have owned women's jockey panties that were exactly the same as male jockey underwear in actuality, but of course they came in a different package that had a picture of a woman on the front.

[Gillian Gigs]

I will say yes. For many of us get an endorphin release through our dressing. It beats running for miles just to get the rush. Well maybe doing both at once would do more for you. LOL

[andrea lace]

I was walking in my wife's bedroom and slipped and fell into one of her high heels. That for me was my gateway drug she has been looking for pairs of her shoes for some time but now they are mine for keeps. saw a pair of her stockings and now cant help myself. I am holding out but now after the shoes and the stockings I am desperately finding it hard to stay away from the hard stuff MAKE-UP. But those shades of red and berry glossy lipstick are now impossible to resist dare I GO THAT ONE STEP FURTHER. As I sit here daring myself to go for the hard stuff I know it wont be long before I am a proper junkie noooooooooo

[verytheresa]

For me crossdressing has an obsessive compulsive component like drug addiction. I obsess about it and am compelled to do it. I don't get stomach cramps and start throwing up if I don't do it like you do with opiates.

[Robbin_Sinclair]

The more I crossdress the more I want to crossdress. Most of us are probably addicted to shopping.

After giving this more serious thought, there are some striking similarities'. Both have the power to destroy people lives. Also numerous marriages and relationships have been torn apart. One particular trait both have in common is lying and denial. Sneaking around also comes to mind.

The major difference is behavior. The behavior of a person on drugs is unpredictable at best. Many innocent individuals have been injured by someone on drugs. Many of us on this site frequently mention crossdressing having a relaxing calming effect on them.

If I had to narrow the topic down to three thoughts, for me, those are what they would be.

A great topic to raise. Thanks again. :hugs: rrbbn

[Secret Drawer]

I often ask people if they think being gay is genetic or learned behavior. I don't judge their opinions as right or wrong, but do ask if they thought any sane person would choose a road like that filled with hate and ridicule? Wouldn't it be easier to just "be" straight? For me its a no brainer, the harder road comes from the genetic wiring that makes it necessary as opposed to a controllable trait. Crossdressing is (to me) a manifestation of something from our genetic makeup. Exactly as homosexuality or a tendancy to enjoy math over reading. All of it is "socialized." Everything we have ever known or will ever learn about is socialized. It is in how our genetic makeup materializes out this socialized reality. Some men can try on a skirt and feel nothing, others get that electricity and never look back...
Also, I have skipped out on work to go fishing on occasion, so I am not sure if we can assume something is an addiction if it "affects" other parts of our life?

[cyndi13]

I am addicted to the endorphin rush when I dress, it calms and centers me. I find that as one of my biggest internal struggles, though the recent push for social acceptance has helped me cope.

[Tiki]

Yes it is....in a way even better

[dawnmarrie1961]

It is a type of "Behavior". As with any type of behavior it can become repetitive and eventually get out of control. Most CD'ers get a euphoric high (We call it the "Pink Fog") from cross dressing. And as with anything that stimulates the chemicals in the brain the user wants to do it again and again to maintain the feeling. Problem arise because, left unchecked, things tend to get out of control in the person's life as they continue to seek a bigger high.The need to "dress" becomes almost second nature and the degree of "dressing" more involved. A person can starts to lose their sense of "SELF" (Who they are.) and instead tries to invent, or create, themselves into to a person that is more inline with what their behavior is dictating to them. Perhaps they were never satisfied and accepting of themselves with who they were before? In any event this inner conflict can be quite difficult to overcome.(Hence a lot of what we call "purging". Our feeble attempt to bring back the status-quo.Sometimes it works.Mostly not.)
As with anyone with a behavioral problem if asked about it they are going to deny it exists or come up with a bunch of fictitious explanations for why they are doing what the do.
Why do these things happen? There are many possibilities. And no one answer that covers everything.The medical community has pretty much thrown up their hands over the years and came up with a few recommendations. But they are as lost as the rest of us. Life is weird.And the science of the human mind and how it works is not as advanced as we'd like to think it is.
So we all just try and muddle through as best we can with the information that we have. And learn to live with it.
I should really learn to keep my mouth shut. Because nobody hear realy wants to hear this.

[Ressie]

I can quit anytime I want to. But I don't want to. ;)

[Dianne S]

I can quit anytime I want to. But I don't want to. ;)

I can resist anything except temptation. -- Oscar Wilde.