Nature v Nurture

[Katie Russell]

I started a thread about CDing being like a drug addiction and there were a number of comments about us being born that way so it was not an addiction.

I think that this is a whole different topic so I though I'd ask if you thought you were born as a CDer or if there something in your childhood that made you want to CD.

Katie

[Noeda]

I think the underlying problem, that most people don't seem to grasp is that crossdressing is not a condition. Crossdresing is a manifestation of GID! We are not born crossdressers, but we are (probably) born with a chemical unbalance which makes our brain behaving differently from standard males. Depending on the intensity of the GID, people will cope diferently. For TS it's not about the clothes, if you ask them! For those who don't want to go that far, the best next thing are the clothes as they are the best aproximation of the feminine look! This is a very very simplistic explanation, i know! Throw in the big O, sexuality and things get very tricky! But this is at the base, we are not born crossdressers but we are born with GID. A caveman could have been a crossdresser? I think not!

[kimdl93]

The problem with this line of thought is that none of us has any way on really knowing the origins. Beyond that, there are so many different variants that fall into the category of CDing. There is some research, but since so far there is no skin test, brain scan or questionnaire that can provide any diminutive answer, and since the vast majority of us are participants but laymen in terms of behavioral science or health, all your getting is speculation.

There is good evidence that some, and I emphasize some, gender variants are determined in fetal development. But that doesn't apply to all cases. There is anecdotal evidence suggesting that some, again some, CDrs were influenced by family dynamics.

Each of us is free to choose whatever explanation we find most satisfactory, for what it's worth.

I'm reminded of a character in, I think it was 'The CiderHouse Rules'. For years the fellow was considered a drunken fool by his neighbors until it was learned that he had a degenerative brain disorder. From that day forward he proudly proclaimed, 'I have a disease.' , because he was finally freed from the social stigma he had lived with, unfairly, for so long.

Perhaps that's the value we place on finding an answer to the why question.

[Vicky_Scot]

Why Do I Dress?

Simple,it is part of who I am.

I had no choice in the matter.

I did not make a conscious decision to be a crossdresser.

I was born this way.

Definitely nature for me

[OzSam]

I really don't believe I was born a CD. For me it is just about the clothes, and I do believe that at an early age I made some decissions about the difference between boys/mens clothes being functional, and girls/womens clothes having more power/influence, and years of CDing has only reinforced this opinion. Was I born with an insecure nature that would make me more likely to come to these conclusions, I think the answer is yes. But I really don't think I would call it GID. And I wonder if I had been raised in an Amish community, with no exposure to modern female stereo-types, just how I would have channelled those insecurities.

Sam

[Laura912]

Would like to jump on Kim's bandwagon here. Her reply is one of the more accurate and less speculative I have seen.

[robindee36]

I think it was childhood experiences and my non-masculine body. Started sneaking lingerie from the laundry in those days as there was no way to buy my own stuff. My how times have changed. Now I have way too many feminine things here in the closet but I am not sure the joy is any greater than in my youth.

Hugs, Robin

[Christina Kay]

I just don't know if genetic disposition , to a propensity to Cd. Since coming out to my wife we have had a lot of talks about why I cd. I believe my first statement, my wife thinks it was a socialization type event , not genetic . That causes me to feel the need to cd. Hugs

[Cheryl T]

This is not an addiction, it's genetic. I was dressing long before I could spell addiction.

[Allison Quinn]

I don't know c:
I identify moreso on the TG spectrum but I really have to wonder if it is nurture. I grew up with only a mom, all of my role models were my sisters and people like my grandma. I was surrounded by women xD I have to wonder if I am the way I am partly because of them. I really have to wonder though because I did feel like this even when I was little C: so hmm. I am leaning towards more nature but having a bit of nurture just facilitated what was in my nature :P

[KatieV]

Generalizations are just that. I recall wearing my mom's nylons at a very young age, and finding the experience pleasurable. That was long before I had any concept of gender identification. I don't have any explanation other than 'that's the way I was brought into this world'... predisposed to crossdressing. Were there other factors that reinforced that tendency? Yes and yes. Such behaviors can over time become compulsive, that's me, and that's the way I'd prefer to think of it, a complusion rather than as an addiction.

[Beverley Sims]

I definitely think there was a trigger in my child hood that started it.

[Stephanie47]

I have absolutely NO idea how I became attracted to women's clothing. I have a distinct memory of being in kindergarten and my teacher complimented me on a cowboy shirt I was wearing. It was clearly a cowboy shirt. She called it a blouse. I remember being deeply offended someone would call my cowboy shirt a blouse. How did I start liking women's clothing?????

[Dianne S]

I don't know what triggered my CDing. I do know that I fantasized at a very young age (maybe 6 years) about wearing girl's bathing suits and clothing.

There was no trigger that I'm aware of such as my being dressed as a girl by family members. The motivation appears to have been completely internal.

[JayeB]

It is simply me.

[Tina_gm]

The way I was raised would have had nothing that would bring this on. In fact I did not bond well with my mother, and had a much better relationship with my father. I lived in a small suburban community that was not accepting of anything different. So I never saw anything much that was different. My father was a typical man of his time, although not a hateful man to anyone. But that given the time in which he was raised (1940's) Though not hateful or homophobic, any guy who dressed was only considered a queer and a sissy, though he did not carry on about it, rather just dismissive about anyone like that. No sisters, or young aunts so no real significant female presence in my life growing up. It's just who I am.

[Dani0948]

I think that all cd's have a built in predisposition. One or more events in our lives launch us on the road we hqve taken. I really believe cd is all about wanting to dress rather than being forced/compelled. I vote for nature with a push from nurture.

[ambigendrous]

Good question. I think one could also ask if wearing ANY kind of body covering is genetically coded into our DNA, or is it a learned behavior? Are we born knowing that we are supposed to cover ourselves with material, or do we learn that as we become aware? If it is a learned behavior then does that mean that wearing "cross-gender" clothes is also learned, or is it a manifestation of a genetically ingrained part of each of us?

[ArleneRaquel]

I started dressing enfemme at the age of eight, or say, dreamt for years about being a female as an adult. I quess that it is was nature. Whatever I love living as a mature female, or at least dressed that way. It is truely a dream come true.

[GaleWarning]

I think nylons were the trigger for me.
I was probably born with something which makes me incredibly tactile.
But it was the look and feel of nylon-clad legs which made me want to wear those lovely items.
(So a potent combination and both nature AND nurture is what I believe in.)

[Amanda M]

Check out my article in the current "Frock" magazine.

Amanda

[Ayame]

The reality is that there is no definite answer as a whole. Different people identify as different ways for different reasons. Many people have had unique experiences that may or may not have shaped their lives. Some people feel empowered by claiming that they were born that way, some feel empowered from feeling it was their life experiences, and some feel it is a combination of the two. None of those are completely correct for everyone, and all of them should be respected. So do not claim everyone in the community as just falling under one of those circumstances, it can be disempowering to some, and I feel we should all be respected for what we believe. According to the APA their stance on the issue is that there is no proof that it is one or the other, but most doctors and scholars think that it is a combination of the two, that doesnt mean that is right either, but that is what the academic community thinks (with a few exceptions on both sides such as Swabb who takes a strictly biological approach, or Butler who thinks all gender is a construction).

[Marcelle]

Ah, the nature/nurture question again. I really do not think any field, psychology, sociology, anthropology, medical, etc. will ever be able to pin this one down. It is like the "chicken and egg" dilemma only what came first "the boy or the girl" (well technically the girl as we all start female at conception - but you know what I mean :))

For me, I don't like to over think this subject as it makes my head hurt. I am who I am whether that was the result of chemicals, my mom smoking when I was developing or just upbringing in predominately female home. I have always liked female clothing more than male clothing but liked to do (and still do) stereotypical boy things.

I find the problem with trying to figure out why is that it almost makes it sound like something is wrong. After all we don't try to figure out why GGs like to wear women's clothing and guys like to wear guys clothing, we just accept it. The minute we can pin down a reason why we are the way we are (hopefully never IMHO) some intolerant narrow minded moron is going to say "Eureka we have a cause. . . now we can cure this weirdness". I say just accept that we are different and move on without worrying why. :battingeyelashes:

My two cents

Hugs

Isha

[Joanne f]

I think the two go together as if it is in your nature then you are going to nurture it and if it was nurtured to start with it must still be in your nature to carry on nurturing it , I do not really see how you can separate the two .

[Bethany38]

I do not know any simple answer for this. I Do know that as far back as I can remember I have loved female clothes. I can remember wanting to wear them as a young child. I remember my Mother asking me once if I wanted to be a girl, I answered with a lie and said no. If I can remember correctly this was my first lie. I know I have been this way my whole life, and until recently was never able to admit it to anyone. There is a whole bunch of issues with this that I will not go into here, but I think I am finally seeing the real me.

[MissTee]

I grew up in a household led by an alcoholic father who was extremely abusive to us both mentally and physically. We lived a very poor and uncertain life, and I learned at a young age to cherish every meal because there was no telling when the next one would come. Also, I still recall many, many times witnessing up close my mother getting beaten unconscious, and fearing the inevitable when that happened as the rage would then be turned against me and my siblings while she was "out." To all that, we were rather nomadic most of my formative years - skipping from relative to relative in search for food , shelter, and safety. Through it all I remember my Mom making sure we were taken care of as best she could, including working two and three jobs when they were available to her. My older brother and I provided for and looked after our four younger siblings while she worked.

In that environment, then, I was left no choice but to grow up quickly. At the time it was all I knew and so many others around us were going through similar or worse. I can say it was tough, but I have never been the "woe is me" kind. While I'm sure I forged some behaviors that would excite a building full of shrinks, I also learned how to fight and survive as well as get ahead.

So, did all that make me a CD? I have a brother and a sister who went through this same childhood with me and they are gay. Did it "make" them gay? Heck, I don't know. I'm focused on the miracle that none of us ended up being abusives, alcoholics, manics, and the like. We are also all very successful in our individual pursuits, and that's a good thing. What I do find interesting is that if I were an abusive, an alcoholic, or mentally unstable it feels like society would be more understanding because the conditions I grew up in "made' me that way. Let me take to the street in a dress, though, and I risk being treated like an outcast and a sexual deviant. Go figure?

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Katie, I think that it all started when I was two days old when
my mom dressed me in that little white satin receiving dress
and mom and dad brought me home from the hospital .

I remember dressing at four or five years old and have never looked back
I will be 71 in four weeks and still loving dressing up
it's just who I'am--- and--- it's just what I do.

[PretzelGirl]

I think sometimes we get too defensive about words because of more common uses rather than the true meaning. Addiction is not necessarily bad, but it is associated so much with drug use that it brings a negative thought to the forefront immediately. I am here to say that I believe being transgender is nature for me *and* I am addicted to being myself. It is a positive thing, an important part of my life, and I am myself as much as I can without letting it override my family and my responsibilities. You can do that with an addiction.

From Mirriam Webster, 2nd definition - an unusually great interest in something or a need to do or have something

[Katie Russell]

I was a PM with this explanation which I though worth posting as it capture a lot of the points made already.

'It is clear from the frequently early manifestation of femininity in (some) males that there is likely a congenital predisposition to femininity. Whether this is genetic or hormonal is not clear to me; possibly a bit of each if one takes the position that hormonal discrepancies in foetal development are genetically triggered.

That predisposition to femininity might manifest as cross-dressing but I suspect there are alternatives. The whole concept of cross-dressing is based on the popular concept that one's sex should determine one's gender. Simply the fact that there are only two sexes (male and female) and three genders (masculine, neutral (or, in people, androgynous) and feminine) should be a clue that sex and gender are totally different things. I put it as:

Sex is what you are!
Gender is what you do!

The fact that clothing is categorized as feminine or masculine (or neutral) and that the gender of clothing is closely related by social conventions to sex is what makes cross-dressing identifiable. If it were recognized that a male can be feminine without contradiction and therefore permitted to wear feminine clothing in order to be feminine then the whole idea of cross-dressing would not arise. More significantly, if it were accepted that males being feminine was, in fact, normal (i.e., acceptable) and accordingly that males wearing skirts, dresses, cosmetics, accessories, etc., was a fairly routine and regular part of human culture, as much as females doing so, then there would not really be much to discuss about the matter.

It is the normalization of cross-dressing that is the goal. This normalization requires first the general acceptance of the fact "nature" creates a tendency towards femininity (or masculinity) in both sexes. The presence of testosterone generally creates a predisposition to masculinity but it does not predestine gender nor is specific gender gestalt a requirement. Once this is recognized then feminine behaviour (defined by convention or "nurture"), including dress (cross-dressing), can become socially acceptable as a means of self-expression by both sexes.

In general I regard the predisposition to femininity in either sex, manifested by dress or not, to be prenatally developmental or 'nature'. The manifestation of femininity, as defined by social conventions taught to members of society are essentially 'nurture'. It is not so much a case of nature versus nurture as a case of nature co-operating with nurture.'

Katie

[Judith96a]

I really don't know whether it was nature or nurture in my case. I was brought up in a predominantly male household (ie dad, me, mum & my brother) and an extended family where "men were men and women were women". I was much closer to my father than I've ever been to my mother (actually, that's putting it VERY mildly. It's probably accurate to say that mum and I barely tolerate each other). I've never been the most outgoing person and in my teenage years (when I started cross dressing) I was very shy, especially of girls (not through any lack of attraction on my part)! As a result I had very little female company. I've often wondered if that was the trigger! And yet, I can recall being fascinated by makeup and jewellery long before puberty hit!
Nature or nurture? A bit of both probably but I think this is one of life's imponderables!

[Sarasometimes]

I believe that nature/genetics sets the stage and how your society define the feminine and the masculine determine your behavior. Gender Identity, Gender Expression and Sexual Orientation all are are on spectrum. Do remember that in utero we all start out female and a blend of hormones then determines that some will become male. If that blend is not all the one way or the other you end up with a mix. Example: A female who is referred to as a tomboy. She only is attracted to men but likes to be rough and tumble and dresses similar to a typical male most of the times. She also likes to get pampered and girly. I believe that if my society had an endearing term, tomgirl for what we do, we wouldn't be here on this board. Cross-dressing viewed as a problem, is societal.
Granted how we express or feminine feelings is a product of society.

[GeorgeA]

I think nylons were the trigger for me.
I was probably born with something which makes me incredibly tactile.
But it was the look and feel of nylon-clad legs which made me want to wear those lovely items.
(So a potent combination and both nature AND nurture is what I believe in.)

Exactly the same thing caused me to become a crossdresser.

[Michelle789]

Crossdresing is a manifestation of GID! We are not born crossdressers, but we are (probably) born with a chemical unbalance which makes our brain behaving differently from standard males. Depending on the intensity of the GID, people will cope diferently.

Noeda hit it on the nose. GID or GD occurs in varying degrees causing us to need to express our femininity in some way to some degree. It may be about the clothes, it may be about playing a female role in a marriage, or may result in us needing to live full time as women and needing female hormones. It may even manifest itself in taking on a stereotypically feminine career.

I think back in the caveman days, or in the animal world, where there are no clothes, cross-gender expression manifests itself in different ways. But we will try to find some way of expressing our cross-gender nature, whatever it may be.