135 Hrs; part deux

[Helen_Highwater]

There seems to have been a flurry of posts about going out for the first time, requests for advice as to what to do or where to go with replies describing just how your confidence will grow.
I recently posted about spending an extended period as Helen, something that happens very rarely. Normally getting a few hours is difficult to do so having this time to be out and about both during the day and at night had a great effect upon my confidence. I’d bought petrol from a supermarket self-serve a couple of times late evening (23:00’ish) while it was quiet but such was my growth in confidence that the next time I went it was the peak evening period. There must have been 12-15 cars on the forecourt but I just pulled up at a pump and went about my business. I think one person read me but the others were too busy to notice.
I’d read here about using drive through fast food restaurants so I thought “What the heck” and went for it. I’m not convinced that the servers even looked at me long enough to read me, certainly the first time. I used other fast food places for the next two nights and I’d say only at one did one of the staff really look at me with any scrutiny.
Being out even at night brought me into close contact with others but as many have posted, and it’s true, most folks are so caught up in doing their own thing that they barely give others a second glance. I passed within feet of couples and groups of people thinking at any moment I would get that quizzical gaze, the WTH look. Yes those did happen, mainly during the day, but overall they were far less frequent than I’d expected and I was amazed just how un-noticed I went. And as many here have said, I didn't hear any rude or offensive comments. Folks just get on with their lives.

I must admit to chickening out when it can to actually going shopping. For a few brief moments I was poised to cross a stores threshold but I held back. Something for the next time.
So what am I trying to say after all this? Well if you’ve never been out but feel it’s something that’s part of your journey, then take heart, read and follow the sound advice to be garnered here, pick your time and place with care and then take that first step. It is liberating and if you’re ever as lucky as I was to have extended time enfem then you’ll hopefully discover more about the you that you really are.

[Tracii G]

Helen it amazes me that so many of us that do go out and relay our experiences here and say just what you just said but there are big strong men here that are afraid of there own shadow.
Ladies its not really that hard to go out and enjoy yourselves in public emfemme.
Just have a plan and pick a spot for your first time and just go do it.
The fear of being clocked or not passing is a moot point, most of us don't pass anyway.You will get clocked by some sure just act like the lady you feel you are.
You will have good outings and bad ones,good make up days and bad ones it all part of your learning process.

[Beverley Sims]

Like Tracii says go out test the waters and take care.

[kimdl93]

All I can do is echo what's already been said. Don't worry about passing, just blend in as best you can and enjoy being part of real life.

[LelaK]

I'm in a position now where I can go out dressed in public, because I moved a good distance from my home town where no one is likely to know me from Eve. But I'll wait till I get a nice wig and maybe a few other things.

Helen, would you talk to us in your British accent? One of my ancestors came from London, but his ancestors came from Mildenhall in Suffolk. Ain't that near the Midlands?

[Helen_Highwater]

Helen, would you talk to us in your British accent? One of my ancestors came from London, but his ancestors came from Mildenhall in Suffolk. Ain't that near the Midlands?

By US standards it's just down the road but worlds apart over here. The main difference old Gal (you did ask for an English accent) is the dialects. These vary enormously, Suffolk being a mix of stock broker through to farm hand. London, no they don't talk Like Dick Van Dyke in Mary Poppins, Ray Winston is more the real deal. Birmingham and the Black Country, the name comes from the grime from the heavy industry caused, have their own distinctive tongues and very difficult to emulate well. If you can find clips of a BBC program called "Peaky Blinders", look on YouTube, that will give you some idea but even those aren't the best I've heard.

[Helen_Highwater]

I used Google maps and Google Earth to check places out before I go there enfem. It gives me a feel for just how safe it is, where things like car parking is and just how many people are likely to be there.

I find it takes some of the uncertainty and hence the stress out of the equation.

[Nyaahaa]

I will mostly go with a friend out and about, never gone alone (not yet) as the enfem me! It's mostly confidence in numbers for me. Although I do have to practice my female voice for about half an hour before going out to get the right tone (along with checking makeup and hair, outfit etc etc) When I go out I don't want people to see me as a Cross-Dresser but rather a woman. But as I go out i get a bit more confident and I noticed the feminine side of me really takes over like a switch now, which is nice!

I'm a nervous wreck when going clothes shopping (at least going to the dressing rooms) but my friend usually whips me in shape with her drill sergeant routine! :)

But all in all, I found just going into the deep end helped a lot and made me realize that it isn't as hard as you think to blend in and live how you want to without fear!

[Helen_Highwater]

Nyaahaa,

Firstly, where did you get your name from? One of your own making?

Secondly you're ahead of me in going shopping. I've not yet found the nerve to enter a shop alone yet try something on. Also given that I don't pass too well I would be afraid of a bad interaction in a single sex changing room.

I do know what you mean about the fem side taking over automatically. I find that the moment I pick up my handbag it kicks in. Having that either over the shoulder or slung in hand is an affirmation of change probably only matched by putting on heels. Everything else done before that is almost a process, makeup, tucking, wig, jewelry, are part of a means to an end, but shoes/boots and bag in hand say job done, Helen's ready to go.

[Nyaahaa]

Helen,

It's just a username I like, I'm really Lucy when I'm enfem!

I found just doing it casually will get you in without any eyebrows raised! After-all they only care about sales, So just be yourself! :)

I found what seals it for me is having lipstick on, It's almost my shield to everything, with that I feel complete!