Finding a man

[julie marie1]

if one wants to go out on a date while dressed, how does one find a man who is interested in being the date?

[Kate Simmons]

There are countless dating sites with men looking to date CDers. Just do a search but be careful.:)

[linda allen]

That would be a very slippery slope. Are you willing to "act like a woman" at the end of the date (I don't have to spell it out, do I)? Most men are going to want something in return for being your date and spending money on you. If you are gay, this may not be a problem. If not, what do you plan on doing, shake hands and say goodbye?

This is something I think is best left as a fantasy unless you have a friend who is willing to be your date. Dating a stranger as a woman is very risky.

[Lexi Moralas]

I agree there are many dating sites for CDs. But you have to understand that they guy is expecting sex to at least be a possibility. Providing the 2 of you hit it off. Just as he would with a GG. So if you want to be the girl you should be prepared to be the girl. This doesn't mean you have to put out simply because the guy buys you dinner. But if its not a possibility at some point , it not really fair for you to go out with the guy in the first place. But if you are gay , by or a least curious to for it , just be honest with the guy about your intentions

[NicoleScott]

I agree with Linda Allen. All of my CDing, both staying in and going out, has been alone. But I've long thought that it would be nice to have a CDing friend to go out with - I would feel more secure. Anyway, we could go out together en femme, OR, take turns being the man on the date. The dates would end with a goodbye and a handshake.

[Lynn Marie]

I clean up pretty good in boy mode. Took my best CD girlfriend out on a date for her birthday. She was gorgeous in an evening gown and I had on a jacket and tie. We had a great time and turned a lot of heads. She claimed it was her most memorable CD experience. I enjoyed it also.

[Jean 103]

I suggest finding a cd friend. I do not belong to any groups, but I would start there. That is if you are just looking for a friend to be an escort.

[I Am Paula]

If you are looking for anything more than a coffee buddy, he's how my GG friends look at it.
The world population being 100%
Subtract 50% to find males.
Subtract 50% too young to date.
Subtract 50% married.
Subtract 50% not sane enough to get thru a date without meds.
Subtract another 50% not sober enough to get thru a date.
There are now at 17 eligible males.
Subtract those who only want to get into your pants= There is ONE perfect date out there. Now go find him!

[robindee36]

In my area there are a number of CD groups and social venues that cater to Tgirls and men that appreciate them. The online approach can be problematic and dangerous. I would caution against it.

However, if your locale is devoid of these venues, be very cautions about hooking up online. The internet is a blessing but can also be a curse for us.

Any LGBT bars in your area?

Hugs, Robin

[Beverley Sims]

As Linda said it is fraught with danger using dating sites.
So be careful.
Get a girlfriend to go with you and try that way.
Two is better than one.

[Lorileah]

you have to understand that they guy is expecting sex to at least be a possibility.

Oh, in my experience it isn't they think it is a possibility...they think it is a given.

[NV Susan]

Oh, in my experience it isn't they think it is a possibility...they think it is a given.

So very true!!

[Sissy_Michelle]

That would be a very slippery slope. Are you willing to "act like a woman" at the end. . . If you are gay, this may not be a problem. If not, what do you plan on doing, shake hands and say goodbye?

This is something I think is best left as a fantasy unless you have a friend who is willing to be your date. Dating a stranger as a woman is very risky.

The key word here is "friend" someone you trust. Linda is absolutely right. You can have all the fantasies you like, though once the "date" is over the he may expect something, even your friend may as well or is courious. Please protect yourself go on a double date. Invite a GG to accompany you on your outing. I am sure whomever you invite won't mind the company of two beautiful women. Which could be fun as well if you ask a GG to set you up with someone that she trusts so the element of going on a blind date is still exciting. Most importantly have fun. :-)

[Stephanie47]

I read some of your prior postings. You're old enough to know the pitfalls of impulsive decisions. I also noticed in one of your early posts that you are married. If you are truly interested in meeting a man, you better be ready to accept the consequences of an disapproving wife if she is not on board with your desires. It seems it is a given that men who are attracted to men who dress as women are expecting sex. I may be wrong, but, I think I am right.

I would suggest mixed group interaction with a support group comprised of cross dressing men and their wives.

[cdmcconnell84]

Hi Julie,
I think that it's hard to give a really simple answer to your question because as several posters have pointed out it's not clear what do you want out of the date. Are you interested in the possibility of sexual activity or not? Are you looking for simple friendship? And as much as it sucks that this is the case, I think the degree to which your options exist may depend in large part by how passable you are...
I will also say, however, that I think most posters so far have been a bit toopessimistic.
I myself, am just a somewhat passable trans girl and through OKCupid I met a guy who I then hung out with irl. We even went out on a sort of "date" to a concert one time. Contrary to most of the posters assumptions, this guy, "Chris" was not at all just looking for sex. My situation was complicated by the fact that I already have a SO, but where I told him flat out that I would still be comfortable kissing him, and he admitted some interest, he was the one to resist the temptation!
So nice guys who are comfortable with transgurls, and aren't just looking for sex, can be found on the internet!
That said, no, it isn't all that common :(
Anyway, speaking general tactics - if you're quite passable, I think your best bet is to make friends with a few GGs and go out with them as just "one of the girls". GGs who are LGBT friendly are often a great intermediary, and they probably already know lots of other guys and might know which ones would be as LGBT friendly as they are... If that's not the case though, I agree with many posters suggestions to become a semi-regular at the local gay/trans bar if possible.
The final big problem as I see it though, is that guys who are interested in CDs or trans girls are as much if not more interested in what makes us trans as they are in what makes you a trans girl. The only way around that is to meet a guy who doesn't know you're trans, but likes you and then tell him about it and find out that he's still okay with it... A tall order, yes...
Best of luck to you though!
We're all wishing you the best...
~Caleigh

[Lexi Moralas]

Oh, in my experience it isn't they think it is a possibility...they think it is a given.

Lol you are probably right