Which was the most difficult place for you to go in femme.

[tamara]

I have ventured to go in femme to many different places. I went to the movie theaters, restaurants, hotels, ladies restrooms ( In a rest area on the road with very few pepe on the rest area), some shopping, etc. and although I travel very often, I never got the courage yet to fly in femme or to go to the mall. Those places are my dreamed experience, but for some reason they are the most difficult places for me to go as Tamara.

Which is yours?

[JenniferYager]

So I went to a second-chance prom. First, I got out of work late that day, which meant everything started off rushed...and already nervous, as I had told no one. I went to a makeup artists apartment, had her doll me up, then put on my prom dress and heels and headed out. It was frightening...here I am driving in Virginia figuring I will either run into someone I know, get pulled over by the cops, or whatever. I made it to the prom (really a glorified house party for folks not in college) and had a BLAST! I made a few friends, had a good time, then drove home. I made sure to follow the speed limit, as I really didn't want to find out what the cops thought of me.

Scary, but totally worth it in the end.

[Violet-13]

car show

[Eryn]

It is always funny how our individual demons vary. Tamara is frightened of shopping malls and I love them. Ladies' rooms hold no mystery or thrill for me any longer, I just use them when I need relief. Waiting in line can be a bit uncomfortable, but I've not had a bad experience.

One thing I have been putting off was getting a makeup consultation. I wanted to wait until my electrolysis was far enough along that I could go out bare-faced without beard shadow. This kind of got sidestepped because my electrologist sells a line of makeup and I ended up getting a thorough consultation and lesson there. I'd still like to do the MAC thing someday.

The only places where I feel uncomfortable about going dressed are those places where a GG might feel a bit out of place. Auto parts stores leap to mind.

[Sarahwithanh11]

I'm with you on the auto parts store! About a year ago I had a headlight out and didn't want to get pulled over of course. I actually pulled into the lot of an O'Reilly's to get a new one but was too scared to get out of the car. Then, by Divine Intervention, I noticed the Jiffy Lube across the street! Wonder if they fix headlights? So I went over there and yes, they do! And they were really nice too.

I think the Ladies' Room the first time was the scariest. My hands were shaking, but I really really had to go. Now it's routine - I mean where the heck else would I go dressed like this? Dinner was a little scary but only the first couple times. The only scary thing about malls is the crowds and how much I spend!

The movies really weren't scary at all for some reason. It was after I'd been going out dressed a while so maybe I'm just more comfortable going wherever now. The more you go out the more places you'll go and the less scared you'll be.

[Beverley Sims]

The most difficult was an office party where we were all supposed to impersonate the secretarial staff.
They were to come as guys.
It went well, I was applauded for turning out well and nobody batted an eyelid.

[Jillian Faith]

The two most difficult/scary thing I've done en femme so far was a busy mall ladies room adjacent to the food court (packed with women and small children) and using an attended dressing room (the one where the SA counts your items). Next up I would like to dine out at a sit down restaurant with a wait staff (not a fast food joint).

[jenn]

For me it is walking in the mall. I am fine in the stores but I get really nervous when there are teenagers around.

Jen

[Stephy]

The hardware store. It was really awkward asking for advice on stuff that a man would typically be buying (and with an obviously male voice). I shouldn't have tried to combine a trip to have my eyebrows waxed with buying new grouting and sealant for the shower!

[Sara Jessica]

One thing I have been putting off was getting a makeup consultation. I wanted to wait until my electrolysis was far enough along that I could go out bare-faced without beard shadow. This kind of got sidestepped because my electrologist sells a line of makeup and I ended up getting a thorough consultation and lesson there. I'd still like to do the MAC thing someday.

I used to think the same thing, that I had to go in bare-faced for a full makeover. Not so at all. (Tongue firmly in cheek right now....) These counters have this really neat stuff called makeup remover which can be applied once you hit the chair.

Seriously, do a makeover, you'll have a blast. Once the makeup is removed, it is usually followed by a complete skincare regimen during which they apply 3-5 different products that would set you back about $150 if you bought one of each.


The only places where I feel uncomfortable about going dressed are those places where a GG might feel a bit out of place. Auto parts stores leap to mind.

I'm with you on that. Home Depot comes to mind as well although if I had a need and happened to be out & about, I wouldn't hesitate to go.

[linda allen]

I find walking the mall (but not inside the stores) to be one of the easiest places for me to go. No interactions with people and nobody gets a good look at you if you keep moving.

I will say the outdoor mall (they are the new style in my part of the world) is easier because in the daytime you can wear sunglasses if you wish.

There are lots of places I would find difficult to go so I haven't gone there.

[BLUE ORCHID]

car show

Hi Violet , You have to be careful when you venture into Testosteroneville.

[Kate Simmons]

I'm not concerned about going to too many places en femme. What would no doubt be somewhat challenging would be some things I've never done. Such as going to the beach en femme wearing a bikini or going in a sauna en femme. Those would make for some interesting experiences I'm betting.:battingeyelashes::)

[I Am Paula]

Walking into my Dad's house. It turned out to be easy, but took me weeks to prepare myself.

[Lynn Marie]

Funny thing is, that I positively hate malls. Both in drab and drag!

[kimdl93]

I go where and when I want - but avoid the obvious places - like biker bars and such.

[CarlaWestin]

Right now the most difficult place is the next place. I have trepidations about everywhere I go dressed. I think the worst place would have to be jail.

[anonymousinmaryland]

I am an underwear dresser only. I can not "dress" (wear a bra) to the blood bank, dentist, various doctors, or to church, as I am not "out." Otherwise I "dress" 17/7. Best wishes to all.

[Jaylyn]

I guess since I've never been out except around the house outside in the country. I would hate to have to go to the barn and put out feed for my cows. They are used to me in male mode. They might stampede if I was enfemme and I woulld hate stepping a a pile of cow manure in my open toed heels..... Lol

[Cheryl T]

The most frightening for me was the first time in the Mall rest room. As Jillian said, packed with women and children just puts the fright level to 11. Once I got past that there's not much that bothers me anymore.
One encounter like about was at the mall and as I was in the stall all I heard was the air dryer (one of those Xelerator ones that has a hurricane coming out the bottom) going and going. When I left the stall there was a woman with 3 little girls who were taking turns standing under it and having their hair blow everywhere. When I approached the women just said, "that's enough girls, let the lady use the dryer". I smiled and dried my hands and the instant I stepped away the girls were back in the wind giggling and smiling. That kind of sealed it for me. No issue there anymore.

[Eryn]

car show


Hi Violet , You have to be careful when you venture into Testosteroneville.

You may admire the paint and interiors, but keep your pretty head out from under the hoods!

[Debra Russell]

When I go out I try not to obvious or be confrontational so I have never had a problem even up close and have always felt comfortable and I have interacted - long ladies room line, restaurants, mall shopping ect. I don't feel as though I pass all that well but feeling at ease I think is the answer........................Debra

[Lorileah]

I have an issue with the shower, hard to keep the illusion there. I dunno, maybe I would not go to a Hell's Angels bar...but then again I don't do that now

[BillieJoEllen]

Years ago I went to shopping mall in another city close by. Had to use the restroom. I had noticed many times before that hardly anyone ever used the entrance near the ladies room. Since I just got there I decided to get that bit of business done with first. Made sure no one was around and made my way in. When I was just about done the door opened and in came three teen-age girls. Decided to wait while they did their thing. After they were done they stayed in the rest room. Wouldn't you know it? In came some more girls. They all knew each other. They talked for what seemed like a long time.

I guess the point I'm trying to make is that I was afraid to leave and be outed by all those girls. After I left I again noticed that there weren't any people using that hall corridor. It was an evening to remember. Instead of shopping I decided to come back home.

[Ressie]

Good story BillieJoEllen. I think that could turn into trouble and it's a probably a good thing you stayed in the stall.

For me the most difficult place to go en femme is anywhere past my front door! I would guess a sporting goods store wouldn't be a good choice either. 95% men.

[wilt575]

For me it is walking in the mall. I am fine in the stores but I get really nervous when there are teenagers around.

JenAlways wonder about those teenaged girls, how and why do they read us, what clue do they pick up on grown ups don't?

[Nikki A.]

I would say my most difficult place for me was a lesbian wedding. I hadn't gone out much before that, it was near where I lived and I only really knew my friend & her husband, her mother in law & her husband (Brides sister).
Turned out to have a really great time, danced my butt off. Met alot of really great people.

[Ceri Anne]

The girls that know me in person, know I am very bold. That said, there are times I'm a bit shy and places I'm a bit nervous. My biggest hurdle that I have yet to cross is the hotel I stay at most when I travel. I dress there often once I'm in my room, and go out, but its easy to not use the main entrance. I've checked into other hotels, but they know me well here and I also have occasional coworkers stay there. I know when they are there, so that helps, but wouldn't want someone to put the word out.

I never had problems with malls, or really anyplace large. Smaller places where you are more likely to interact personally with someone are more difficult. Large places are anonomous. I also went to a red neck karaoke bar and performed. I was with friends, and would have had problems going there alone the first time.

[Julie Gaum]

Where I'm going tomorrow scares the you know what out of me --- the beauty salon. Yes, I went my first time out to start waxing eyebrows and flatten my hair
but it was raining so most of me from waist up was covered with raincoat. Tomorrow at noon will be wearing caramel/rose pants and a shortsleeve black cardigan with draw strings at the waist. Interacting with the staff in a soft voice will be the problem. Yeah I know, fearing fear ....
Julie

[julia marie]

I didn't know it at the time, but using the women's bathroom at a beach area. I had my "bug eye" sunglasses on, and when washing my hands i noticed a woman who looked familiar who looked familiar. Got home and went on Facebook and realized from a former coworker's post that she was there and then. Grateful for big, face-distorting shades in this case.

[PretzelGirl]

Hands down a movie theatre restroom. Always busy and loaded with the younger generation. Every place is a little bit of a barrier on its own. If you avoid a place, it becomes tougher over time. So the easiest thing is to do it all now! :D

[jjjjohanne]

I have thought, "I don't know if I could ever do that..." about several things that I later was able to do. Normally, the new things are not too tough. So, I am not sure what would be the hardest place to go anymore. The two hardest places to go enfemme that come to mind are: in front of my wife and kids and my church. I guess that means that I don't care nearly as much what anyone else thinks of me than I do of those people. :)

[Dannigirl]

I don't mind going into too many places as long as there is nobody there :) Actually, I try to avoid places where there are too many 18-30 year old men. I don't mind teen girls and ladies and being laughed at if they feel the need as that doesn't hurt as much as some red neck d bag deciding to beat up on the "queer in a dress" for being different.

[Eryn]

Always wonder about those teenaged girls, how and why do they read us, what clue do they pick up on grown ups don't?

They don't read us any more than adults, but if they suspect something they have less self-control. An adult would hold their tongue unless they are completely sure of what they saw while most teens lack that capability.

That being said, I've been in a few situations where I've been read by teenagers and it has really been a non-event. They stare and giggle a bit and a few seconds later something else comes along and distracts them. A feminine smile their way on my part seems to settle them down.

[Sheelah]

I LOVE the salon!
My beautician is sooooo cool!

[Krystalina]

Right now, everywhere.

I dream of going out of town, where I will indulge in being as femme as I want.

[Persephone]

Where I'm going tomorrow scares the you know what out of me --- the beauty salon. Yes, I went my first time out to start waxing eyebrows and flatten my hair
but it was raining so most of me from waist up was covered with raincoat. Tomorrow at noon will be wearing caramel/rose pants and a shortsleeve black cardigan with draw strings at the waist. Interacting with the staff in a soft voice will be the problem. Yeah I know, fearing fear ....
Julie

Gopher it, Julie, and have a wonderful time! Then come back and tell us all about it!


You may admire the paint and interiors, but keep your pretty head out from under the hoods!

Uh, there's a lesson there for everyone, Eryn!

Hugs,
Persephone.

[jjjjohanne]

I always present male. On a trip, my first flying pretty in a skirt, I needed to go to the restroom while I was at the airport. I went into the men's room and went to a stall because a skirt makes it complicated. I don't know why I was nervous. Those same guys from outside aren't going to be different in a bathroom... After I finished, I went to wash my hands. I found the sinks all unattended. I started washing my hands. Three men walked in. They used the urinals on the wall behind me. One was looking over his shoulder at me with some amount of shock on his face. He didn't consider that I was facing a mirror and had full sight of him. It was stressful, but like most new outing achievements, I realized that I was safe and was free to dress up as I saw fit. I dried my hands and walked out. And here I am today, happy and alive.

[LisaDee]

The mall and stores I am fine with. The scariest was going into a sit down restaurant alone the first time. I went into a Chili's and got seated and served no problem but, it still makes me a little nervous. Flying pretty? Haven't done it yet but, I want to when I get the opportunity.

[Brooklyn]

Anywhere in the daylight? Oddly, the most anxiety I probably ever had was going to my first Tri-Ess meeting en femme. I had been out on my own many times for years, but that night I felt worried about doing or saying something wrong in front of other more experienced CDers and being rejected. My fears were completely irrational, of course. :rose:

[Marcia Blue]

I have a bunch of CD friends, who are a little on the crazy side. We meet quite of in the Des Moines, Iowa area for GNO's and shopping.

One such GNO, we were talking to a GF of a Des Moines CD/TS. She works at a Sportsman Warehouse in Ankeny, Ia. We were talking about guy things and such. When were she worked and what she sold came out. Well the next thing I know, we have a shopping trip planned for the next day. You guessed it to the Sportsman's Warehouse.

I was really apprehensive about going there en-femme. On the way there we went pasted a "Gentleman's Club" called the "Lumber Yard". On of the girls mentioned stopping there on the way back. My only comment was, "Visiting a strip club while dressed was not on my bucket list."

We made it to the store and I gathered all my courage. We headed in and found our friend pedaling her wares. She showed us some very nice items and explained the unique points of different models. I do not think anyone bought anything but we had a good time. My fears were miss founded, we got a few stares, but that was, it.

I still am not ready for any "Gentleman's Club" outings.

[Rachel Morley]

My places are pretty much in line with what others have mentioned. My first time in a movie theater restroom was scary. Hella long line of young women all talking to each other. My first time in a nail salon was on a very busy Saturday afternoon. All the stations were full and as I waited and picked out a color, I felt as if everyone in there was looking at me and "could tell". I've never been in an auto parts store yet but that also seems like it would be "difficult".

[Launa]

Most difficult place was 2 weeks ago at this old sports bar. It had a lot of men there and not too many women.

I will be going there again next weekend en femme. Nothing like getting comfortable with being uncomfortable.

[Lil Ashling]

At the Salon for a mani-pedi. It was crowded and I was wearing a short sundress

[Staci G]

Like some others I have a thing about malls. Mostly because of the teenagers hanging around. I am usually spotted but I usually don't care. I love stores that are free standing I tend to like walking across parking lots and on sidewalks of strip malls most

[MsRenee]

The scariest place I ever went dressed. Was to church.
It was my first time there since moving to rhat side of town and was wanting to start going to church again.
After walking in with butterflies. I settled into a corner near the back at tried to keep to myself during the meet n greet.
Wasnt long before people srarting coming up and welcoming me
I was nervous for some time bur after a while began to breathe and enjoy the services.
Since then Ive been welcomed back with open arms no matter how Ive been dressed.
Thats the sxariest place I ever went to and now Im glad Ive crossed that threshold.
Renee

[Barbra P]

The first time out in public, other than on Halloween, was to a TG support group meeting. The meeting were held in a private room in a restaurant and I had to walk through the crowded restaurant to get to the meeting room and of course I was the first to arrive. Later when I had to use the restroom and walking into a Ladies room was scary, but it was empty although a woman entered while I was washing my hands. I half expected her to run out screaming that a man was in the Women’s Room but she smiled and entered one of the stalls.

But the scariest was the first time I went to see my Therapist. Her office is on the third floor of a large medical center. Walking into and through the crowded lobby had my nerves on edge, but then a man and his young son, maybe nine or ten, got on the elevator. The son made me instantly and stared at me all the way to the third floor. Once checked in I proceeded to the waiting area and low and behold the father and son came into the same area and once again I was the object of the son’s attention. Of course I was early so I had to endure being stared at for close to fifteen minutes. I could have kissed my Therapist when she announced “Barbra you can come in now” and I could finally avoid the boy’s scrutiny.

I’m still get a bit nervous walking though the parking lot toward the entrance but this month I actually enjoyed all the interaction with other people. The woman who checked me in wanted to chat and we had a nice conversation about knee replacement recovery. She needs a knee replacement and I’ve had one. When Kelly came to the waiting area and addressed me as Barbra the woman sitting across from me looked up and smiled and then Kelly commented on how nice I looked – talk about a rush of feel good.

[julia marie]

Nothing like getting comfortable with being uncomfortable.
Launa. This is the line of the week. It's so accurate. I've been finding that once you "survive" the crowded mall or sit down in a restaurant, it becomes easier going many more places.

[Sarasometimes]

Restrooms that seat more than one are pretty scary and also Claire/Icing if it is loaded with teen girls. They can be very direct with their observations.

[Chickhe]

It is not difficult to go anywhere...but, the hardware store is the one place I noticed where older redneck type guys jaws drop when they see me... (obviously read and unsuspecting people who don't know how to react)...except, also it is one of the places the female cashier was very friendly too.

[kendra_gurl]

I've been to a few clubs, malls, theaters, restaurants, lots of casinos, and used the ladies room in all of them with minor thoughts about me being there.
By far the scariest time was Halloween a year ago while dressed in a fashion similar to Elvira in fishnets. I need to use the restroom but knowing it was Halloween and as much attention my costume was receiving I was pretty sure everyone knew I was really a male. So I just Man'd up and went to the men's room and stood at the urinals beside all the other guys.
It really turned out funny as the first guy who saw me said I think your in the wrong room. In my male voice I told him I thought the women in the ladies room would have told me the same thing.