dressing our age

[tylia]

I am seing a lot of cd's out there that have a tendency to dress a lot younger than they actually are. I believe the best way to dress to pass is to dress your age. There is no bigger giveaway when trying to pass as an older gurl in a short niniskirt and 6 inch heels

[I Am Paula]

While I firmly believe in 'To each her own', I have to agree. Have fun, present any way that makes you feel good, but don't come home and post on the 'net about not being accepted.

[Princess Chantal]

I wouldn't "pass" so I tend to dress the best way to have fun and satisfy my own crossdressing wants.... Don't give a care what other people think! So the best way for me to crossdress is to not stress out about dressing my age or how other people dress.

[binx]

I agree that the best way to pass is to dress appropriately for your age AND for whatever location/event you are visiting. But at the same time, I don't think everyone is always trying to pass. They might just be wearing something they find fun or cute. If they're just dressing at home, passing isn't really a big deal.

[Kate Simmons]

I tend to dress in a way that makes me comfortable which is pretty much conservative which is my own choice. In any case, we should all be prepared for second looks and double takes by others if something seems out of place.:battingeyelashes::)

[MssHyde]

I think you should dress for the occasion an dress for the age you appear, sometime being in girl mode can take about 20 years off in appearance

[Khaleesi81]

I know what you mean. I like 50s/60s inspired stuff so maybe dress a little older!

[tylia]

you are absolutely correct Mss Hyde.....I not only look younger when i dress but feel younger also .

[tylia]

I always dress a bit older just in case i miss the mark. For me it's about not being noticed in public and it is becoming quite an adventure

[Zylia]

I agree, but in the end it's all just make-believe (on the cross-dressing side of things anyway) and Catholic schoolgirl fantasies or French housemaid fantasies are about as valid as 'vanilla woman' fantasies. If 'passing' is a concern, then so is your appearance obviously.

[Jaylyn]

Since I'm not out except on the farm yes my animals have seen me but if you feed them they could care less. Here's my thought on that I will dress to please me. My wife loves me and says have fun with it but just don't embarrass the family. So I tend to think I am still a youngster so I dress like one. Mini skirts and tight tops. Takes me forever to walk in my 6 " heels to the barn so I just. Play at the house in them. At my age all I'm pleasing is my wife and myself. I do have to agree though that with the proper makeup I can look younger.

[Melissa_Rose]

My problems is my mind is about 25 years younger than by body. I seem to be stuck with a mindset of a mid 20's woman.. but the mirror keeps lying to me. ..

[rachaelsloane]

I think you should dress for the occasion an dress for the age you appear, sometime being in girl mode can take about 20 years off in appearance

I've got to agree with Cheyenne about girl mode making one look up to 20 yrs. younger. I go out quite regularly in SF and the majority of the time the person(s) I'm talking to assume I am in my late 40's, early 50's. What really blows them away is when I tell them I have a 43 yr. old daughter and two grandkids.
Regarding dress, I do dress to the occasion and wear a minimal amount of makeup.

[Jenniferathome]

and now let the chorus of "who are you to tell me what to wear?!" and "I shouldn't have to dress like a grandma," begin.

Funny how such rational advice, given many, many times before, will be vilified. As if age appropriate and frumpy are the same thing.

[Donna June]

I probably dress younger than I should, really short skirts, but I know what you mean. I once saw a woman in a frilly purple chiffon cocktail dress, big silver heels too. Beautiful outfit, thing is it was in the middle of the day in a supermarket. When I got closer I realized it was a CD and wow, did she stand out.

[KayleeTaylor]

For me, I like to dress younger to fantasize about the life I never had. When I do dress younger, I never leave the house. When I want to go out in public, I try to blend in.

[Zylia]

and now let the chorus of "who are you to tell me what to wear?!" and "I shouldn't have to dress like a grandma," begin.
In all fairness, there are plenty of women who say the same things :D

[StephanieDragg]

I am 51 yrs old, my curse when I was younger was that I always looked much younger than my age when I was 18 yrs old I looked like I was 14, by 21 I looked like a 16-17 yr old, I was routinely carded even into my early thirties, well its a blessing now, most people who meet me when I am dressed figure me for 35 or so, I always emulated and admired well dressed women in nice dresses, skirt sets, and especially sharp business suits with a great pair of pumps and coordinating accessories. I do feel much younger and alive when I am dressed, even to the point that my slight limp from sports injuries is non existent when I am strolling around in my heels, I stay away from outfits designed for older women, as my wife or others would say it made me look "frumpy". I do agree with the others who stated that many cds looked 15-20 yrs younger when dressed. I also agree that there is a place for the club wear and short leather miniskirts and cfm pumps, but usually I am out about grocery shopping and stopping in other stores etc so I try to look appropriate.

[Gillian Gigs]

The question is, "do you want to stand out"? To dress in a fashion that says, I want to blend in, would be to consider being age appropriate IMHO. Lets face it everyone can spot the "cougar" at the bar by the way she is dressed. Look at how many 14 to 19 year old girls dress to get the attention of the boys. Not wanting to get into the whys, of why we dress, but what is the motivation when a CD goes out? Is it to get noticed, or to blend in? Hunters wear camo while they in the bush because they don't want to be noticed, so is dressing in an age appropriate fashion a type of camo when a CD goes out in public???

[Lynn Marie]

I dress to pass. Now if all these idiot drivers would just get out of my way!

[Bria]

I think Gillian may be right about camo, age approprate dress to blend is a form of camo, but is that not what most of us do in drab?? I agree that a good make up job will take 15-20 years off so then for me age approprate is mid 50's instead of 72, at least I hope so. Your en femme appearance is much affected by your choice of wig color , length, and hair style, soooo how old do you feel/want to appear?? your choice, as it has been said, do what is satisfying and have fun, Bria

[karenfry]

Yes I agree,when in public I dress my age. I save the mini shirt and 5 inch heels for home.

[Karren H]

Screw dressing my age... acting my age... or even admitting my age....

wear what you want.... wear what makes you happy.... except womens jeans... lol. for a group that breaks all the rules why follow this one?

[linda allen]

I agree. Some crossdressers seem to have an obsession with six inch heels and skirts that barely cover their crotch. If you dress like that, take some photos and see how silly you look.

I try to dress like a genetic woman in my age group, especially if I go out in public. There's nothing that screams "crossdresser" louder than inappropriate clothing and shoes.

[docrobbysherry]

When I'm out dressed at a vanilla venue I dress to "blend". But, I don't like it because I hate wearing granny clothes!:doh:

I'm a closet dresser. So, I'm used to dressing to please NO ONE BUT MYSELF. With NO LIMITS.:D That's what crossdressing is all about for me!

214883

[Nadine Spirit]

I think it is best to dress appropriately for the situation.

If I am going for a morning exercise walk, I will wear sweats and tennis shoes. If I am going into SF for the day to walk Pier 39, jeans, tennis shoes, and a thick coat. If I am going wine tasting, some comfy dress. If I am staying home, then maybe some items I would never post on my blog ;)

I don't know so much about dressing your age. I think that is rather demeaning. Two things I try and think about when I dress, first - does it actually look good as in, does it actually flatter my body and looks and secondly - is it appropriate for what I am doing. My birthday party dress for example is not so appropriate for shopping at Costco.

[Debra Russell]

My problems is my mind is about 25 years younger than by body. I seem to be stuck with a mindset of a mid 20's woman.. but the mirror keeps lying to me. ..

Oh yeah! tell me about it - in my mind I am a 20/30 something young lady but the mirror keeps me in check - I try to dress age appropriately .............................Debra

[Chickhe]

This is one of those concepts that seems easy, but in reality it is pretty difficult to define what you are supposed to look like at a certain age. Take a sample of the general public and I can guarantee you will have the whole range of styles in there... What you need to do is dress in a way that works... pick someone near your own age who you admire, who has a similar style, body type and use them as a guide. ...one way to do it is to pick a category, soccer mom, business woman, etc.

[Beverley Sims]

Tylia, a lot of dressing is associated with fantasy.
Some things I wear around the house are not suitable for street wear.
If I want to indulge myself as Dorothy, a maid, or a blushing bride then so be it.
I would not share these fantasies with others unless at a specialist meet.
When going out I dress appropriately to blend.
I can get away with jeans and top in summer.
Winter is a cover up event so tights and other accoutrements suffice.

[rachael.davis]

"Anne, Queen of Shops" (great BBC series) gave the advise "fourty forever", after fourty dress like you're fourty, and proud of yourself

Works for me

[Lynn Marie]

I like to think I dress my age. You know, maybe 49.

[kimdl93]

I wholeheartedly agree.

[suchacutie]

Regardless of my gender presentation, I dress for the occassion. When I go out to work in the garden I wear old clothes that keep me covered from the elements, dirt, and bugs. When dressing for a girl's night in, I dress to make my wife smile. When I'm alone and staying in, I dress however the day feels. I haven't yet gone to a symphony concert, but I sure wouldn't wear jeans and a T-shirt to that evening affaire!

Dressing for the occassion is only restrictive if I can't find an occassion to match my mood!

[JuliaM]

I came out to my wife 3 months ago. Since then my wardrobe has gotten more conservative. I think this is primarily due to my desire to take dressing beyond the inside om my home. Rather than buying based on the mirror I now buying to pass. Still love my mini skirts but they won't be be my first choice for my maiden voyage out!

[Kate Simmons]

Screw dressing my age... acting my age... or even admitting my age....

wear what you want.... wear what makes you happy.... except womens jeans... lol. for a group that breaks all the rules why follow this one?Age before beauty, right? Wait, that didn't come out quite right did it?:heehee::)

[LilSissyStevie]

I have a foolproof way to blend in. Not only will you blend in but you will pass 100% up close and personal. No one will ever suspect that you are a crossdresser. Here it is - dress like a dude. That's it! Works every time. I walk around the mall sometimes dressed like a dude and everyone thinks I really am one. LOL! HA! HA! HA! What a bunch of rubes! Otherwise I just wear what I like since I'm not going to pass as a female anyway.
:tongueout

[Sarah Beth]

I think it's up to individual taste and how you want to look and the attention you want to draw. I have seen a lot of GG's out dressed in a way I thought they looked horrible. Years ago I would wear minis and in fact didn't own anything that came over half way down to my knees. I have gradually changed to the point where now I wear a lot of maxi length. That first came about when my wife found this dress at dress barn she thought I would look cute in. It was long but when I first put it on and saw myself in it I fell in love with it.

[Karren H]

Age before beauty, right? Wait, that didn't come out quite right did it?:heehee::)

Or you'll never be as old as you look? lol

[CynthiaD]

I'm in my second childhood, so I can dress however I want. Ha ha! :)

[Lorileah]

I believe the best way to dress to pass is to dress your age. There is no bigger giveaway when trying to pass as an older gurl in a short niniskirt and 6 inch heels

You need to meet my friends. I have a friend who is 85 years old, dresses (and looks) like she is 60. Several others who are in their 70's and dress like 50 year olds, many my age and like me they dress similar to a 30-40 year old woman. I also have many drag acquaintances who rock platforms and minis, but they in no way want to blend (blending is over rated, wear jeans and atop with tennies if you want that, in other words wear what you wear as a guy, just throw on some makeup and a wig)

[Lexi Moralas]

I tend to dress like a 40 something holding on to her 20s that's the look that makes me feel good if I can't wear my tight jeans and high heels I might as well not dress at all. ( in actuality I have not been able to go out dressed in a couple of years , and I really wish I could ) but that's my preference. I found the less I cared if I blended the more it seemed I did as far I I can tell anyway. For all I know they could be laughing around the corner , but so long as no one is rude to me I'm good with it

[mykell]

i dress in what makes me feel like a girl, but reality is the older ive grown the better ive gotten at some things (walking in heels) the nerve to buy clothes, jewelry for me , the younger i dress the older i feel, someday the bottom will match the top. not out and about with this so its just for my pleasure around the house. but if i do get the nerve to venture out would have to be flats and leggings, whatever it talks to blend a bit as im 6' without the shoes.

[NicoleScott]

So there is a right and wrong way to crossdress after all? How does one get appointed to be Fashion Police?
For many of us, CDing is fantasy. If we can pretend to be female, why not pretend to be a younger one?

[carhill2mn]

I totally agree! The mini skirt, very high heels, etc. can be enjoyed in private.

[alli2229]

You have that right Nicole. I want to have fun when I dress up and if wearing a sweet short petticoat and sissy lace and ruffles little girl styled dress with T-Strap shoes and pretty tights or stockings why not. After all I never got to experience this when little so why not now.

[Michelle (Oz)]

So the rules are: men shouldn't dress in women's clothes; if they do then they should pass; if they don't pass they should at least blend; to blend they must dress age appropriately; and definitely older men mustn't wear short skirts.

Bugger ... there goes my femme fun working through my younger femme years which I missed. There goes my chance to look and feel younger.

Funny though I've made lots of friends who respect the honesty and the friendly and happy me. Thankfully there is a greater acceptance of difference in the community than in this Forum which pushes conformity.

Great that there are others who agree though ... life is to short to regret missed opportunities and happiness.

[Zylia]

How did we go from

I believe the best way to dress to pass is to dress your age.
to

So there is a right and wrong way to crossdress after all?
and

men shouldn't dress in women's clothes; if they do then they should pass
?

You may or may not agree with the OP, but that's not what s/he said.

[daviolin]

I like to dress the age I feel at the moment. Daviolin

[JamieQ]

I probably do not dress my age (50ish) but I am told I look pretty much look like the women my age and then I am also told I present 40ish or younger and I fit right in when in public. My skirts are probably just a bit short...but I am thinking as I get older I should not wear them that short...so I am doing it while I still have the girl looking legs! I pretty much dress appropriately for the situation.

[Shanine]

I pretty much dress in a style similar to how I dress as a guy. I am a t-shirt and jeans kind of guy, so I tend to wear strappy tanks, sleeveless blouses and skinny jeans(i luv skinny jeans), and some type of flat or low heel (3" or so). I do like to wear dresses and skirts, and I don't mind showing a little leg, but I try to keep it tasteful. I like to show off the nice work I do on my keeping my legs smooth once in a while ;-).

[iGenny]

When I started (very late bloomer) I was obsessed with dressing my age - and I never go out! It took a while for me to try things a woman my age shouldn't go out in, just for the fun of it. I guess I need to make up for lost time?

[Erica Marie]

That was my idea of dressing till about two years ago, but at the time I also only dressed at home. In private I guess you do what you like. But if you want to head out and be presentable, depending on the venue of course, it is wise to dress your age or at least what you can blend in with. Alot of people, ggs and cds alike, appear younger or older than they are. I guess it is wise to dress, lets just say, appropriately.

[tylia]

Well spoken Zylia........it has gotten a little off track i believe. I do the extreme high heels and mini's around the house , but for me.....when i go out , it's always knee length skirts,nude/tan hose (yummy),and a 2 to 2.5 inch heel. I like co-ordination and that does not have to look frumpy at all.

You nailed it Linda, thats exactly what i was talking about.

[Karen kc]

I dress my age, the elderly lady in ths mirror looking back at me says so!!

[Iris_Luna]

I always try to dress as a girl of my age... (21). Sometimes is hard, because i have almost nothing to wear, but in my mind this is the right thing to do.

[MssHyde]

I'm 61 but I don't think I missed the mark. I don't look or carry myself like a person of my years. when I ride my harley I feel like a 27 year old. I know we need to use discretion and dress for the occasion, however we need to dress for our attributes or shortcomings as well.

[Patricia Johnson]

I agree. Some crossdressers seem to have an obsession with six inch heels and skirts that barely cover their crotch. If you dress like that, take some photos and see how silly you look.

I try to dress like a genetic woman in my age group, especially if I go out in public. There's nothing that screams "crossdresser" louder than inappropriate clothing and shoes.

the only thing is have to say to that is within the Genetic womans age group there is a wide spectrum of women from those that like to be seen to those who tend to want to not be seen. I think that to be honest to and fair, if we're emulating women and their wide range of choices and options, some of us prefer to be seen and noticed and sexy and some will chose to represent the other side and prefer to blend. I don't think there is such as thing as dress my age. I dress to feel complete and express the feminine energy that rages through my body. My expression may cause others to notice me a bit more, but PJ is not shrinking violet and loves being seen.

[sometimes_miss]

I am seing a lot of cd's out there that have a tendency to dress a lot younger than they actually are. I believe the best way to dress to pass is to dress your age. There is no bigger giveaway when trying to pass as an older gurl in a short niniskirt and 6 inch heels

Sorry, I never had any desire to be a fat homely old lady. so I never dressed that way. Despite the 'Mrs Doubtfire' movie, I can't imagine why anyone would use that as a goal when figuring out what to wear. I've had the desire to be a young, pretty girl since I was about 7, and I don't think it's ever going away. Really, is there anyone out there that wants to be a frumpy old lady?

[Lexi Moralas]

So there is a right and wrong way to crossdress after all? How does one get appointed to be Fashion Police?
For many of us, CDing is fantasy. If we can pretend to be female, why not pretend to be a younger one?

Ill drink to that !

[Iris_Luna]

Only rule: Dress as you want and the way that makes you feel good with yourself :)

[Lacyfem]

I think you should dress anyway you want to and if there are repercussions you'll deal with them. Besides what is dressing your age mean and at what ages should you change out your wardrobe and move onto the next required age attire. Dress to enjoy and have fun.

[Stephanie47]

I'll drink to anything. However, I see many GG's who think or at least portray themselves as being four decades younger than their true ages. I don't know if they are dressing like that to pickup young guys because the old farts are after the young chicks. Yes, there are societal norms and expectations. Most try to adhere to those expectations.

I dress as I normally see GG's my age dress now. Not like my grandmother dressed in the early 1950's. If you are an at home fetish dresser; French maid, Catholic school girl, nun.... so be it! Have fun. If all you want to do is go to the store and buy a gallon of milk six inch heels and a micro mini dress is going to attract attention when worn by any woman. And, if you turn around and show a lot of beard shadow and a wrinkly face.... well, you are doing a disservice to the cross dressing community at large.

[Jaymees22]

If I'm not dressing to my gender then dressing to my age is irrelevant! I'm dressing for my own amusement and trying to look the best that I can. Naturally if I'm going out I'll dress around my age but still try to have some style, otherwise what's the point? In some cases dressing my age would be a pine box. Jaymee

[mikiSJ]

...I tell them I have a 43 yr. old daughter and two grandkids.

I have stood next to you and you DO NOT have a 43 year old daughter - at least I don't think you do!!!!!

[kfsteve391]

I feel that it depends on your body as to how you dress. I work very hard at maintaining my weight and have a rather slender body. I enjoy wearing tight tops, mini skirts and strappy high heel sandals.

[Jilmac]

Sometimes I have to question the actual meaning of "age appropriate". I' ve seen some pretty hot sixty-something GG's wearing clothes made for juniors. I figure if thay can do it and feel good about themselves, I can do it and pass.

[Jean 103]

While reading thru all the posts I remembered when I was in. High school they thru out the dress code. I wear what I feel comfortable in, as I live in .CA well .

[Bethany_Anne_Fae]

Sorry, I never had any desire to be a fat homely old lady. so I never dressed that way. Despite the 'Mrs Doubtfire' movie, I can't imagine why anyone would use that as a goal when figuring out what to wear. I've had the desire to be a young, pretty girl since I was about 7, and I don't think it's ever going away. Really, is there anyone out there that wants to be a frumpy old lady?

One doesn't "need" to be frumpy, why not a regal silver haired matron of the house? I'm 50, and the only exceptions to dressing my age so to speak is when I portray the Faery Queen at the renaissance festivals, and then my younger look for the goth club I go to a lot. When I'm done up, I can take 20 years off just with the makeup alone...the rest is all up to attitude and having fun with life. Now, those two looks I would never take out to the mall, or shopping etc... for that I have my "normal" clothes, dress suits, jeans etc. Dress for whats appropriate :)

[KateSpade83]

I'm 44 years old and what makes me look old are two forehead wrinkles and lots of gray / white hair. But when I put on my Bob hair wig that all gets covered up and my slim figure will make me pass as a teenage schoolgirl if I dress up as one. When I went to Culver's for my birthday ice cream I asked the manager to guess my age; he said 28 but I was 44.

I had a dress that I bought that I thought only an old woman would wear, so if I want to feel like an old woman I'd wear it. And then one day I saw an old woman wearing the same dress I had! Unfortunately I don't know wear that dress went because my mom got rid of 4 double racks of my clothes and gave them to poor people, against my wishes! Totally pissed me off as I lost some irreplaceable stuff.

[tamara]

I think that everything depends on what the person is looking for. If you are looking to blend in or "pass", it is most helpfull to dress your age. In my case, when I crossdress is to have fun, and feel sexy. And I do not fell that way dressing as grandma. Still, i do not kid myself trying to dress as a 20 year old girl, but I try to be more of a "cougar"

[MaryAnn40c]

that is the way I feel....dress the way "YOU" want!

[Michelle (Oz)]

Or you'll never be as old as you look? lol

or maybe as young as you look dressed lol