understanding

[lacyheart]

I have been very depressed Lately, the feeling to purge overwhelms me to tears, but I end up buying more lingerie, I need understanding on why I do that?

[Lucy_Bella]

Cding can be like comfort food when larger people eat .. It helps the depression or it could add to the depression ,,..May be the very thing that causes the depression in some.. Really ,only you can answer why that is ..

[Tracii G]

Sounds like you feel guilty about being a CD.
The purging part sounds like guilt and the buying more sounds like you may be a shoppaholic.
Seek professional help please.

[Beverley Sims]

Have you discovered a new girlfriend.
Do not purge either, that is wasteful.

[Lynn Marie]

I have to assume that you are aware that depression is either a medical condition or a situational condition. Both conditions are treatable. Also, continual shopping is a "feel good" addiction and a direct result of not feeling good like being depressed. This is pretty simple cause and effect to me. Maybe I'm missing something.

[Shari]

You're conflicted from the simultaneous guilt and pleasure dressing gives you and aren't real sure how this all came to be.

It's all about accepting yourself and facing up to the fact that this is the way you are wired.

Quit fixating on the negative and just sit back and enjoy the ride.

[Marcelle]

Hi there,

Depression as others have said can be quite the monster to wrestle with and depending on the root cause, should not be taken lightly. My question is how long have you been CDing? Is this a new revelation or something you have carried with you for a long time? Have you ever thought about speaking with a "gender identity therapist"? While therapy seems to be an extreme measure, it can bring clarity to some of your worries and may help to bring clarity to you. To be honest, as a psychologist, I get concerned when people say they are depressed. It may only be transitory but then again it may not. Although we on this site can provide advice, support and personal experience, we should not be seen as the purveyors of mental health advice. Please think about seeing a mental health professional.

Hugs

Isha

[lacyheart]

A friend of mine told me if I decide to purge she would take the clothes and hold them until I want them back.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Lacy, Don't do anything that you will be sorry for.

Rule #1. Never purge !

Rule #2. If you feel that you must purge, See rule #1. AGAIN !

[mykell]

lacy heart
i see you are new here, after i had 10 posts other forums were opened to me. have you gone back and read some of the older posts, some may have the answers you seek, by reading lots of previous threads i have felt comfort from similar thoughts and reply's answered some of my concerns.
I have purged many times in the past myself and regretted it . if you have a specific question to ask-ask it, the only stupid question is the one you never ask. sometimes in denial you may purge, depressed folks feel good when they shop. seeking help takes courage, be courage's and if we cant supply all the help you need here you may need more from a professional. but know that we support you here.

[Billiejosehine]

Lacy,
I can really relate to how you feel with the depression and guilt. Depression can stem from several issues such as environmental chemical. I myself take meds and the guilt does not help my situation either. We often feel guilty because we believe that we are doing something wrong or worry what others think. We end up purging only to have the feeling of wanting to CD because of how it makes us feel and doing what makes us happy. While it is easier said then done, as I struggle myself, don't feel guilty about doing what makes you happy. After all clothes are only an extension of who we are and gives us a way to express that.

[Karren H]

You really don't need to understand it... because even if you did.. it wouldn't change a thing... You need to just accept it and move forward... I did and it changed my life... don't care why.... don't wast time trying to find out something that can't be answered....

[jenni_xx]

I disagree and agree with Karen. There's nothing wrong with trying to find out why you crossdress, but then if you don't find an answer then it doesn't matter.

Karen is clearly in a good place in regards to his crossdressing. And I applaud him for that. Sometimes we simply don't need an answer, so in that respect searching for a reason is a futile exercise.