Keep a CD Diary?

[LelaK]

Who keeps a CD diary?

Or who thinks it's a good idea?

[Okay, what about a CD blog?]

Would you care if anyone found your diary?

What's the most interesting thing in your diary? (to you)

Would you like anyone to read your diary posthumously?

I don't know if I'd want my family to, but I guess I wouldn't care, unless it would have a detrimental effect on humanity.

[Cynthia Anne]

I have thought about having a diary many of times! I have never started one though! I do think it's a neat idea!

[KayleeTaylor]

I don't know about actual diaries, but there are a lot of people who have blogs. If I started a diary, I wouldn't care if anyone found it. Anyway, I would rather start a blog :)

[JamieQ]

No written diary...but I wish I would have kept a photo or video diary, lets say at least weekly or monthly for the last few years. Its amazing how fast things get so improved each time I go out...physically and mentally...I am pretty much doing weekly videos now though.

[JessicaMN]

I keep one, i write in it every couple weeks or so. I started writing in it in aug. 2012. It has helped me get thoughts and stuff out of my head. I write it like a series of letters to my future self.

[Hannah Gotta]

I keep a daily crossdressing diary/blog at www.hannahgotta.wordpress.com

I talk about what I wore, the thoughts I am thinking and post a lot of pictures.
You might like it!

Love, Hannah

[Kate Simmons]

Once you write something down, it's there unless you destroy it. Who may read it when you are gone would really be the luck of the draw.I kept my Grandmother's diaries but mostly I like seeing where I was when she wrote down what she did. :battingeyelashes::)

[Stephanie47]

It would be difficult to explain my wardrobe, let alone try to explain a diary if discovered.

[Beverley Sims]

I leave enough on here to fill a diary, so no blogs no diaries and nothing to leave behind but what is here.
I do have photos but not much else.
Clothes?
Lots of them.

[Zylia]

Summary of all the entries:
Wore a skirt today. Sat on the couch for a while surfing CD.com. Smudged my tea glass with lipstick, better use a straw next time. Took a few pictures. Have to properly wash off all the make-up now because I have to go to work tomorrow.

[Ginger Maxim]

I like to keep a picture diary of my dressings.. I LOVE looking back at what I had on.


summary of all the entries:
Wore a skirt today. Sat on the couch for a while surfing cd.com. Smudged my tea glass with lipstick, better use a straw next time. Took a few pictures. Have to properly wash off all the make-up now because i have to go to work tomorrow.

like this...

[stephNE]

I have never started a diary nor a blog, but I have thought about it many times.
On one hand, I think I have had a number of funny things happen while crossdressing, and I would like to record them.
On the other hand, I am not out to anyone in the family except my wife, and after I die, I worry about who will find the diary. I know they will find my clothes, unless my wife gets rid of them first, but that would be easier for them to dismiss than a description of events.

[Cheryl T]

I have thought about it many times and wish I had begun so many years ago.
The feelings and fears, hopes and dreams were kept inside. I think that had I expressed them (even privately, but openly) I would have come out so much sooner and had that burden of secrecy lifted.
As for a blog, no I don't have one.
As for someone reading it after I'm dead...well, I'll be dead so I won't really care! If someone did and it changed their opinion of me after knowing me in life then they didn't really know me, weren't really a friend and I don't really care what they think.

[kimdl93]

I journal on my tablet using an ap called seven note. For mr writing with a stylus evokes a contemplative mood. I find myself delving into the emotional and philosophical aspects of my life as a transgendered person in a way I seldom otherwise do.

[Guy19]

:) That sounds like an good idea

[Missy Tanya]

I've kept one going for the last 6 years. Only for myself, it reminds me of where I've been and how much I came along in my CDing. Funny thing now that its Not that Big of a Deal to be out dressed, I've falling off on my writing. But I've gone through many cycles of my CDing and I'm sure this is just another. Somedays when I'm still looking for the right answers to Why, I look back and can somewhat find one or two.
As for someone finding it, well I've thought of that too. Been going to write a letter to "whom it concerns" and leave it in my dresser for that person can understand why all these womens clothing are in my dressers. But still haven't, maybe will give my password out for the computer too and give them tracks to these links. That way maybe they can be at ease with some of this.. Heck someone has too!!

[PretzelGirl]

Mine has basically been here and on Facebook. I guess that says how deep my thoughts have been going to this point. :heehee:

[karinels]

This is probably a bit out there, but i do keep a diary of "dates" I've been with. Just a quick reference for myself just in case, well, just in case.

[corrianna]

I advise against keepin a diary due to a continuing experience. If you want to keep a diary I suggest you keep it on your computer or blog with good security.

Here is my story of keeping a diary which in the end turned out to be a bad thing.

A few years ago I used to keep a "pink diary" where every single one of my fantasies and actual real meets were described. A lot of it was fantasy but at least half was real experience. From normal meets to club meets to bondage sessions and pre-arranged rape fantasies. I had a regular master at the time so most of what I put in this diary included my master and his sadistic ways. The diary kept getting bigger and bigger.

Any way. When I moved out of my parents house, a friend of my parents offered to help me as he owned a van and money was tight. To cut a long story short, he found my diary, and read it In its entirety. He knew every naughty deed I had performed and my deepest and darkest desires.

I was blackmailed into sex with him which he recorded against my will and used the footage as more leverage. He blackmailed me into daily sex and prostituition. Making me pleasure him and his friends. Whilst recording more footage and using it against me. It was an never ending nightmare. Having to dress up as ****ty as i could every night and being gang raped. This happened for around 9 months or so. I was on the verge of suicide. Then one day as I was going round to "master's" house, I found him I'm the living room, dead. I thought it was suicide at first. I removed make up and dressed normally before ringing the police.

In the end it turned out he had a heart attack. Which I am sorry to say I'm gratefully for as he would still be blackmailing me into gang raps to this day if he hadn't of died.
So be carful what you wish for girls as it can come true.......

[krissy]

I used to write all my feelings down but when i got divorced the first time she showed it to all my friends and family. it took me years to get over it.i don't write any more

[Jackie7]

I keep a photo album going back 15 years, I like to see my evolution and also remember good times with my sweetie. Also some essays written at different times. I think about starting a blog but doubt I would keep it up.

I no longer give a damn who sees it. I like to show it to friends, tho not to my descendants.

[Candice Mae]

I thought about a CDing blog before, but I don't think anyone wants to read my ramblings. And it would be yet another thing I do not have enough time for.

[Tracii G]

My BFF told me I should start one just to get things off my chest.Sort of a personal therapy kind of thing.
I really don't see the reason for it,it would be me talking to me and whats the point?

[JamieQ]

Oh...talking to yourself I think can help...same as putting things in words...get it off your chest as to speak of. My video diary for me serves 2 main purposes. The first to to see myself in action, pick out a few things at a time that need working on and try to improve upon them....stuff like mannersims, walking, body language... The second is basically affirmation that I can successfully do this!

[Annaliese2010]

You have as "detrimental effect" on my humanity LOL :battingeyelashes:

Gee Lee your so innocent. And that's just precious.

[MissTee]

I dairy almost every day, but no en femme specific entries. Just thoughts and observation on my life, my frame of mind and emotions. The way I figure it, Misty and I are as one and our thoughts are melded together into what I share in my dairy. No need for a separate gender based treatise.

[daviolin]

I don't have a written diary. My idea of a diary is photos and videos. And I have thousands of them. Daviolin

[Laura Collette]

I've kept a CD diary for a year. I just needed "someone to talk to" candidly about my feelings and about what I was doing. I was only at home, very isolated, using only eye makeup, lipstick, wig and clip-on earrings. I still don't have any girl clothes except a bra that's too big. The diary means a lot to me. I would be embarrassed if someone found it and read some of the things I've written about sexual feelings, especially those that tend toward the bisexual direction, and I may edit those out just in case. Otherwise I want to be candid and won't intentionally share it but let the chips fall where they may.

[Jaymees22]

I kept a diary/journal for the first year, but found it as boring as my life so I stopped. I mostly kept it on days I dressed, what I wore, how it made me feel "great", what I had for lunch, what tasks I had completed and stuff like that, see it's boring. Hugs Jaymee

[BillieJoEllen]

I used to keep a CDing history of myself way back before computers were in the home. It was found by my future wife four weeks before we were married. She also found all my clothes and told quite a few people. They all encouraged her to drop me like a hot rock and RUN! Of course a few weeks later she did marry me.

Now a days I write CD stories. They are mostly about the thoughts I have now.

[Lee Andrews]

I have one, just for Lee. Sometimes I write a lot but then I'll go months without doing so. It's just me marking important 'Lee" days or times and my feelings about it. Kinda interesting to go back and read my thoughts from the past.

[linda allen]

I don't keep a diary as a male and I don't keep a "CD" diary. I don't see the need and I can see many downsides.

[AllieSF]

I leave enough on here to fill a diary, so no blogs no diaries and nothing to leave behind but what is here.
I do have photos but not much else.
Clothes?
Lots of them.

This is more like me. To keep a diary takes desire and persistence. I do not have the desire nor the energy to write a diary for me or whoever I may think would need or like to read it. Beverly's comment made me realize I do have a desire to share and participate here and that helps or facilitates my regular posting. This can be considered my more or less diary. For some people diaries can be fun and helpful and a very good thing, a sort of self therapy, a safe zone to write down exactly how one feels and thinks and may not feel confident enough to share with others. For others it may become a crutch as they do not learn how to better express their feelings, needs and opinions to others when that would be just what the doctor would prescribe to help them move forward. A written record can be a good or bad thing when eventually, if ever, found by others.

My Mom late in life used to suggest to everyone that they should write a diary, take notes on a trip and just write down things that they did or experiences. None of us kids ever took up her advice to the best of my knowledge. However, I can now see what she meant. At her advanced age there was a lot of enjoyment for her to go way back in her life to remember things of interest to her. With a loss of short term memory typical in the elderly her long term memory became very important to her, and may eventually my long term memory may be important to me.

[LelaK]

Diary of Fiction

I'm a problem solver, so I thought of how to solve a couple of problems with a CD diary.

Boredom: Make up stories that are interesting to read.

Prevent Getting Outed: Instead of referring to yourself, pretend the CDing person in your diary is a friend of yours, a CD who calls you frequently to say what exciting CDing things she's done.

[Adriana Moretti]

i keep a note book to keep notes of say...a makeup idea, or a new product I want to try...I am also building up a blog right now..it is starting from day 1 after I decided to get back into dressing again..everything I have learned in the past, and lots of new things I learned are all being documented. I feel I absourb things more when I right them down. Maybe one day I will make the blog public...but right now its just private for me.

[Krystenw]

I have a 64 gig thumb drive that I have all of my photos on. Until I moved, I would take a set of photos every day to sort of chronicle my life.
I still take them several time a week. Although I guess since I'm pretty much living full time as a woman now, it isn't quite as exciting as it used to be.

[Dawn Gurl]

I have been keeping a written diary of what I've felt, what has or hasn't worked and things I see that I'd like to try. There are times during a tuff day, that it has helped to keep my sanity !!

[Stephanie Morgan]

I started keeping a diary about a two years ago. My wife noticed that I was still having some trouble embracing stephanie and so she bought me a really nice pink diary book. We talked about things for a bit and she suggested that it may help me to write things down. While I do not write in it every day, I do journal about twice a week and for me it has been a tremendous help!

[julietalyse]

I have recently started to archive photos. For me the photos say it all.

[Vanessa Rose]

Diary,

Love the idea, but not in todays age... well at least with out huge encryption and all.

why? ......You love your spouse and

have been together 20 years, they suddenly tell you they need to find themselves
you are not a good bloke and your lady feels she would like to date around and take a break
your wife's friends get a hold of it because your wife told the ladies about you... you are chum
you loose the drive
someone steals the drive
your computer malware mysteriously downloads your data to a site that uses it to ......
your wife has an affair

do what you will, but that lovely partner you have, all that data you stored, all the trust you have in the world.... is one sentence away from being used against you. IT happens every day in every city, town and country in this world.

I would have such a significant password and encryption on it if it were me...

Reality...I may do this myself, but i need to really consider some things...
1. rules to access and movement of files
2. who has access and do they have it alone? why if so?
3. if you looked at your materials and did not have a red face to a judge, child, friends, family and an entire courtroom looking at you... then fine

everything has pluses and negatives....

Vanny

[njcddresser]

I have kept a diary since I came out to my wife about 3 months ago. It is very therapeutic as it allows me to express my inner feelings. I don't hide it or anything, so if my wife wanted to read it she could. She has told me that she respects my privacy and I believe her.

Do I care if someone were to find it? Not really as Im proud and happy with who I am?

Most interesting thing? Probably my self analysis that tells me that I've had this feminine side to me my entire life that I've been suppressing. Now she's out and a big part of who I am and I love her!!

Would I want anyone to read it posthumously? I plan on being around for quite a while so it's not something I'm really concerned about at the moment. Ask me again in 30 years.

[FairyLink]

I don't have a diary. However I do keep pictures.

[KaceyR]

Never kept a diary since way young...
Nowadays I'd have to do it on the computer. (handwriting's gone soo bad since comp age :))
I've kept some notes and tips on the comp and ipad/iphone but as far as my own CDing...really the big things have been recorded in my posts here.

But I had thought about it...not just for CDing but also just for figuring things out about my own messed up self.
Someday I might get to a therapist and could then plop it down and say here's my mess...heh.
Biggest issue is length of time to enter/do..it's bad enough how big some of my posts get here and how long it takes...
And I'm a bit of a lazy person at times...

[Vanessa Rose]

Nj

In thirty years you have a high probability of this being an issue. Greater than 50% yes? Be aware is all it is HUGE! Divorce is huge. Huge...and they will rip you limb from limb with what is written. If you are getting a divorce, the first question they ask you is do you have or post on social media sites?
If there is not writing or video and in some cases and they vary, recordings it ain't a fact or admissible. It is just your word

That said I hope your marriage lasts forever as I hoped mine of thirty years or so would have lasted. Very, very sad but people change (hint).

There is no good answer here except the one you feel is appropriate. We are all adults and although therapy is good, if you must diarate. Diarate and hide your therapy, encrypt the shit out if it and protect yourself.

VANNY

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Lela, It's like the Miranda Rights

, " You have the right to remain silent, anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law" .

[allison_mx]

i dont keep a diary since my mom discovered it, but now i crossdress at home almost everyday since i am in hormone treatment right now to become a full figured women and my mom is helping me out to achieve my goal

[Sissy_Michelle]

Who keeps a CD diary?

Or who thinks it's a good idea?

[Okay, what about a CD blog?]

Would you care if anyone found your diary?

What's the most interesting thing in your diary? (to you)

Would you like anyone to read your diary posthumously?

I don't know if I'd want my family to, but I guess I wouldn't care, unless it would have a detrimental effect on humanity.

I keep a CD diary

I believe keeping a journal or diary is a wonderful idea on many different levels. Either for your CDing or just everyday life. For CDing the diary records your thoughts for that day, where you went, who you interacted with, how you felt, and the victories you achieved.

I don't use a blog just yet, blogs are usually online which means you are comfortable with everyone knowing you CD.

Yes I would care if anyone found my diary. Only my wife knows the password.

The most interesting thing in my diary, is a post where I went had gone over the reason why I crossdress.

Could "Anyone"? Read my diary posthumously. No.

@--}----
Sally

[MsVal]

Each morning while on a vacation trip I record the previous day's activities. It may be places we went, things we did, things we liked or disliked, etc. Those journals make great reading, even years after the trip. Some day my kids will make a decision about what to do with them. A CD journal, however may not be as enjoyable for them. If found, it may make several people unhappy, and I do not want to be the source of their unhappiness. So... While I like the idea of a journal, and believe that I know how to properly secure it, I don't.
Besides - It would be pretty boring to read dozens of my entries that would say "Same as yesterday."

[Caden Lane]

When I was working up to my weight loss surgery, I had a score of emotional issues I was dealing with. I decided to start keeping a diary. Amazingly, it helped me deal with those issues. They weren't intangible ideas or concepts floating around in my head anymore, they were tangible thoughts and words, they were off my chest. It also let me frame up goals that I wanted to set. One unwritten goal at the time was to loose weight so I could wear sexier stuff. I knew my GF wanted to read it, and I didn't mind because of her support with the weight loss surgery. But at the time I hadn't revealed Caden to her. I'm beginning to think that a femme diary may be a great idea. Would certainly help me work through my guilt.

It'd also be a way to document my progress and efforts, sort of like my dive log when I go cave diving.

[CONSUELO]

I have kept a written journal for many years but I am not consistent. I use high quality blank journals with heavy paper such as you can still buy from good stores like Smythsons on Bond Street. I use it to record ideas, thoughts and as a way to work through difficult issues. I keep it out of sight in a safe place but my SO once saw me writing in it one evening and decided that she wanted to read it and did so without my knowledge or permission. I thought that was a gross breach of trust. My journal is a private place and one in which I try new writing ideas as well as recording some of my struggles. I don't want to keep a journal on a computer as I like to write with a fountain pen on good heavy paper. The mere act of handwriting is therapy for me.

I saw the reply from the respondent whose "friend" blackmailed him after reading his diary. I regard such action as a great betrayal. Why do we want to "blab" on others so much and not just respect one another's privacy. This is a worsening trend in modern times. I always dislike "kiss and tell" betrayals and despise their perpetrators who are usually fodder for the junk press and TV.

[BeckyAnderson]

I have a diary of sorts online at http://home.comcast.net/~iamacd/enter.htm. I haven't made any recent entries simply because nothing has changes since my last entry. Hugs, Becky

[ArleneRaquel]

When I first went full time, about 10 years ago, I kept a diary for 8=9 months, then I lost interest in the diary and I have not gone back.

[marsha leanne]

i kept a written diary of sorts for several years. It was kept in my work truck! It started out by just putting down some of the questions i had but then grew into a multi volume history of just about everything i did in fem. I still have it but have not made any entries in about a year. i think there are 3-4 notebooks stashed here at the house.
this is a very interesting thread as it was something i had planned on sharing when i got a bit more comfortable here. It is amazing how many of us are all following the same path. this forum is such a liberation for me, i so thought i was alone in this for many many years. thank you, thank you ,thank you!