First lost friend, and what price vanity?

[I Am Paula]

Over the course of the last year I have come out to everybody I know, including last week finally retiring my male Facebook page, and starting my new one. The news has been met with overwhelming acceptance, and love. I have been including a short message about myself, and my transition with each friend request. Well over 200 fantastic responses. This morning at 7:00 I lost the first friend. One of Canada's best loved musicians, and the guy who picked me up at the airport when I moved to Canada in 1976, refused my friend request, and sent me a PM that simply said 'You're sick.' First negative response ever.

On a lighter note. Next Sunday I'm going to a huge semi formal party, where at least a hundred of the people I came out to this year will be in attendance. This will be the first time many of them will see Paula, other than FB.
Being a victim of fashion, plus wanting to make a good impression, I made a rough tally of what I have spent (or will) to unveil myself to my friends.
Hair, the day of $55 plus tip
Gel nails $30
Black suede heeled booties $350
Black satin Tuxedo pants $120
White sequined shell $90
Black crepe shirt $80
Silver clutch $30
New undergarments $90
My mother's pearls-Priceless
Valet parking, so I don't have to tromp thru' snow $20

Why didn't I transition into a dog? a new bandana, and some breath spray and I'd be ready to go.

Y'all have a great day!

[Leslie Langford]

Now that's what I call "high maintenance", Paula ;) .

Sounds like a great look, though, and I'm sure that you'll be the "Belle of the Ball".:thumbsup:

Of course, you realize that after that build-up, pics are now mandatory...:daydreaming: :D

[Angela Campbell]

Vanity? Sounds like the essentials to me.

[PaulaQ]

No price is too high for vanity, hon! Sounds like a really fun event!

[mikiSJ]

Paula - good for you and your coming out. Losing 'only' one friend is in a sense a success.

Please don't tell me the Canadian muscian was Gordon Lightfoot! (We may be a generation apart in our appreciation of music!)

[I Am Paula]

Miki, not Gordy.
Gordon and his daughter Ingrid and I have been friends for years. He would not have an unkind word for anybody.

[kimdl93]

Sorry bout the pm. Mostly sorry that whomever declined and made that rude comment. I just hope it wasn't one of my favorite Canadian artists.....I don't ever want to know! Although I'm secretly dying to know.

The upcoming party is worth the price. Why not look your best! Have a great time!

[Ariamythe]

It was Bieber, wasn't it. He always seemed like a conservative type.

[Leslie Langford]

Couldn't have been Justin Bieber - Paula talks about knowing this musician friend going back to at least 1976. At that time, Bieber was likely no more than a gleam in his father's eyes... ;)

[Ann Louise]

There might be a few others that will fall by the wayside as time passes honey. In my work environment nearly every woman and man among the 50 or so I work daily with (excepting one weird fundamentalist type) have been really, really supportive, but the coffee-table-type chat has either changed tenor, or dropped off to all but a polite and friendly nod and "good morning" of acknowledgement with many of the males. The women have been and continue to be a total joy in my life, though, and every day I am so thankful to receive the affirmation as "one of them" that I am continually extended, every day, all day. All the best to you dear, Ann

[bas1985]

I have notice this same resilience in male friends. Total acceptance from females, though, which is for me most important

[kimdl93]

Couldn't have been Justin Bieber - Paula talks about knowing this musician friend going back to at least 1976. At that time, Bieber was likely no more than a gleam in his father's eyes... ;)

We could make a list...given the timeframe I suppose we could rule out Celine Deon and Diana Krall. I think time and sexual preference rule out k.d. Lang and Rufus Wainright, among others. I hope it's not Gordon Lightfoot and certainly not Neil Young...he is a god! So that narrows it down to Ann Murray and Bryan Adams. Who knows what lurks in the hearts of men....or Snowbirds!

[mary something]

As long as it's not Neil Young, I would find it to be incredibly hypocritical of him based upon his work as an artist to assert that opinion privately to someone. Whoever it is, F them Paula! It is their problem not yours. I suspect that isn't the only opinion of this person's that you would find offensive or disagree with.

Of course age rules out Bieber, also if the tabloids are to be believed I don't think he would have too big a problem with it lol

Sounds like you will look classy and beautiful at the event, hope you have fun!

Love your new picture btw, you're getting some curvy hips!

[Chickhe]

...'sick' is the new cool, isn't it?

[linda allen]

1) As a guy, one or two good suits will get you through any number of occasions. As a lady, you're expected to wear something different each time. You didn't think being a lady would be cheap, did you?

2) "Conservative" does not mean one hates gays, transexuals, crossdressers, minorities, etc. There are biggoted "liberals" out there.

[Nicole Erin]

$350 for some damned boots? $90 for some undergarments? Shi.... I am all about retail therapy but that is a bit pricey. Well, as it is, as it is... Why not a skirt though? Show off them legs!

About the friend - It does bite that someone would be like that. I mean you two been hangin since 76? The hell is his problem? I have had friends that faded away over the years (not cause I am TS) but none have just rejected.

Also about acceptance in general - Ts have a lot more acceptance than we think. Of course some of the pricks of society don't but think of this - so 200 folks have no problem and one does? That is a whole 1/2 a percent of acceptance/rejection ratio, you are doing fine.

About the formal gathering - Nervous about it? You will definitely be making a grand entrance. The sounds of dishes clanking, people talking, etc will stop as they turn to see the new you. You can get there late and make such an entrance or be the first there but then more work intro'ing yourself.
I wanna go too! I always thought it would be neato to go to something like that.

So then, let us know how it goes. You already know it is gonna be THE night of your life. Have a blast!

[Robbin_Sinclair]

...'sick' is the new cool, isn't it?

My first reaction was what kind of friend was he if the was so rude?

Taking this a little further, "sick" is a go to expression. It is lke f.u., m.f. or any other simplistic explicative that people use without thought. Perhaps this is the thing that a stressed out musician might say after things went wrong in his day.

If this is really a good friend and you have his physical address, why not write him, not FB? People still send Christmas cards. Say how you feel. It might be worth a try.

On the other side of this all, you have your priorities in order. It will be a wonderful outfit. It's all about elegance. It would be sick to be worrying about the cost.

:hugs: rBBn