Has Anyone Ever Thought About "The End"?

[Desirae]

This question is mostly for CDs or non-transsexuals.

Not trying to harp on or bring up the idea of death, but has anyone ever thought about how they would like to be buried, either in male clothing or female clothing?

If you have thought about this, have you or are you going to put your final wishes regarding this in your will? Does it even matter to you? Are yourwishes known to someone else? If you haven't thought about this, yet, how would you want to be buried, in drab or enfemme? Do you already have your "coffin dress" or whatever you want to wear?

Sorry for the morbidity. Just curious.

[Launa]

I don't care what happens when I'm dead and gone. My SO might cremate me in a dress or decide I need some payback punishment and burn me in a Sears Sucker Suit.
Either way it won't matter as I'll be dead and all that matters is what I do while I exist here on earth.

[Rachelakld]

Main personality is male, like to go out in battle, or die at the gym while posing for a group of young attractive girls who try CPR on me. Burn me naked and stiff

[Robin777]

I am like Launa, I don't care how I am buried or cremated. I'm dead so I won't care how I go. If I die dressed up I will be happy.

[Cynthia Anne]

Even though I consider myself TS, due to too many health problems I will never be able to move forward and be the girl I know that I am! I have decided not to be selfish and be buried as the father of my children! I think down deep they would prefer that!

[Julie Gaum]

Des, this OP has been covered before however it's a good idea to do it from time to time as the youngsters here, understandably, don't look ahead too far. So to start off, since I'm now alone for the first time in 57 years I needed to have everything in black & white, Salvation Army will get everything left after an executor (a lawyer in my case) carries out distribution. Rather than go into further details, and one must go into details including a "living will" that everyone MUST have now,
I will be buried in male garb. Everybody has a different reason for that decision --- mine is pragmatic: The VA takes care of me now, I've bought a casket at local funeral home, and though I have three locations possible from family plot to cousin's plot to one waiting in Washington State --- Washington is picked for the ocean at my feet and mountains behind (Silly isn't it?), a military funeral with a missing-plane flyover. One could say that nobody will see me once I leave Florida behind but it's a feeling I have. Ironically, the title of my book will be on the tombstone so what am I hiding? Those are the decisions we need to make ahead of time.
Julie

[kimdl93]

Believe it or not, this question has come up a number of times since I joined almost four years ago. Some express concerns about having their secret revealed after death, others about whether their final outfit will be pretty. For me, neither question is relevant. I can't control what people think about me now, so why worry about after I'm gone. And my attire won't matter now bit.I oils prefer to be composted and recycled to nourish the planet I've been living on for so many years.

[MssHyde]

I came into this world with nothing, I still have most of it left!

I feel it would be best if I was buried in the closet

[Nicole Erin]

I do not claim a solid gender label. With passing on, I would rather be buried in a dress. Buried upside down so my friends can stop by for a cold one.

[NathalieX66]

I don't care if people know my girl side. OK..... Now everyone knows.

Good. Fine. Done.

I don't need a legal name change or a tombstone with a female name. I did it my way. Just cremate me, celebrate with a toast of hopefully something strong, like cognac, whiskey or rum, I don't care, and throw my ashes in to the Atlantic Ocean......which seems to be the tradition for my family these days.

[Amy R Lynn]

Interesting question. I haven't really thought that far ahead, but you never know when that will be. When the end comes for me, I'm certain that I want to be cremated. I think its silly to be planted in the ground. For what? I've told most people that I know that I want to be cremated. If they would like a memorial to visit, find a nice park, dig a hole, put my ashes in there, and plant a good solid tree (like an oak tree) in my ashes. When the tree grows, it will grow with me.

As far as what I'll be wearing at the viewing.... I really could care less. As long as I'm not in my underwear or naked. If I progress to the point where everyone sees me in a dress all the time, and that is how they want to remember me. I'm good with that. However, I'm thinking that they will want to remember me as a man. So either way I'm good.

[Kate Simmons]

It really wouldn't matter since I'd be dead and would have no control over my physical remains. I have made it known to close family that I'd prefer the most expedient method available for disposition. Any memorial service would be entirely up to them.:)

[erica12b]

I have a friend she wants me to dress at her place and leave my stuff there ,she knows im in the closet and wants to protect my kids , just in case somthing should happen . (I wish she was closer and i could but she is not there very much and our sceduals never match )

[Persephone]

Ths is a very serious question for many and there is certainly no "one size fits all" solution.

Unless things change, I assume I'll be buried in my currently legal (male) name. But I'm pretty sure there will have to be a couple of funerals or memorial services, one for "him" and one for "me" since there are some folks who only know me as a guy and some who only know me as a woman.

There are only two things I really care about. First, I want them to make definite sure that I'm dead before they bury me. And two, I definitely do not want to be buried wearing a girdle!

Hugs,
Persephone.

[Desirae]

.......................to one waiting in Washington State --- Washington is picked for the ocean at my feet and mountains behind (Silly isn't it?),
Julie

No, I don't think that is silly at all. Sounds lovely to me. Thanks for your pragmatic response. I noticed that pretty much every topic imaginable has been covered at some pint in the archived past threads.

[Helen Grandeis]

I would like that my body be fully consumed for transplant purposes and medical research; however, I don't think that my survivors will be very aggressive in execution of that wish particularly since our religion believes in the literal resurrection of the dead. I will probably buried in my full dress white US Naval Officer uniform (affectionately known as choker whites)

There are several in the forum who are acquainted with both sides of the coin. I hope that they will pass on news of my demise.

[sandra-leigh]

I haven't conveyed my wishes to my SO or family yet, but I do not want my services to be as a male; and I want my obit to list "Sandra" explicitly (better yet, first); and I want my services to be open to my CD and TG and TS and gender-queer friends.

Part of the reason I haven't conveyed these to my family as yet is that the family grave (my father only, so far) is on land owned by a religion which I do not wish to be construed as being a member of (even if I was when I was a child.) There are two Big Lies that I am concerned about happening to me after I am gone: pretending that I am male, and pretending that I am a member of that religion (or any related to it).

[5150 Girl]

I've told my Polar Bear what dress I want berried in.

[celeste26]

All of the ceremonies after death are for the living people since the dead dont really care anymore. Let them believe whatever it is they believe about me, I'll be long gone and wont care what they do.

[Brooklyn]

Apparently you can have your ashes made into diamonds now, so maybe I can be eternalized into some ladies body-piercings? Seriously, if I'm not remembered as Ashley at my memorial service, someone REALLY messed up!

[Lynn Marie]

I used to think that I wanted to purge my entire enfemme wardrobe to the dumpster before I died so people that knew me would have pleasant memories. As I age, most of those people who I was concerned about no longer matter! My closest friends are CDs and I hope they'll have a great time picking over my wardrobe and accessories! As for my body, make me into organic fertilizer.

[AllieSF]

My only requirement is that I am cremated and my ashes scattered in the nearest large body of water. I do not care how they decide to dress me.

[Zylia]

I guess two things are important when I'm dead: "How can I still support those I leave behind "and "How do I want to be remembered". I don't think that a request to be 'dolled up' post mortem will make a positive contribution to either of those. My physical remains actually are of no importance at all, to me at least. I'm an organ donor, but after that my relatives can dispose of my body as they see fit.

[linda allen]

A while back, my inlaws spent over $10K that they couldn't afford on a funeral and burial. That's without the stone. They could have found a far better use for that money.

When I die, I will be dead and won't care so it's up to my wife and children what to do with my body. They can burn it or donate it to science.

[Karren H]

I have thought about it way too much.... having just attended a good friends funeral yesterday.... he sure didn't care what he was wearing... neither will I....

[Patsy Ann]

I think about that in regular basis due to my line of work my employer has update our final plans on a regular basis.We have to update who and how we want people notified and who we want to do it. So its already been decided i'll be buried in full male uniform. They even have us plan out entire ceremon. So that keeps the subject in our mind always.

[Karen kc]

My wife and I have talked about it, told her my thoughts, she will make sure Im sent off with pantys& hose. Then she said,what'll you care?

[SherriePall]

I know how I would like to be dressed, but I doubt it would happen considering everything. I am leaning towards cremation after my organs are taken out (if they don't wear out first). Years ago I told everyone I just wanted to be tossed into the local river back when it was totally polluted. I figured that in no time at all I would be gone! But they have cleaned it up and now it's a class trout stream and I am not really sure I want fish nibbling at me as I go down the river.

[terrianncd]

My wife and I have talked about this as well. We both wish to be cremated, however there is the "showing". For that I have requested an over the top fairy tale dress. Pink and white. It will be TerriAnn "showing" and leaving.

[Happy]

in a proper man suit. i want to remembered as the good father of my children and that goes with my masculine values. i am not very proud that i have this urge but i do.

[Cheryl T]

Since I want to be cremated it really doesn't matter...no one will know anyway.

[vallerie lacy]

I have informed my family that I want to be cremated and have my ashes sprinkled in the dressing rooms of Victoria Secret stores.

[Beverley Sims]

I think Chyenne had the best reply here, I do agree with her, but I do not wish my relatives to to have something to remember me for other than just being a pleasant person.
Boring I know.
Why stir the pot.

[Annaliese]

It does not matter to me, as long as when I get to the other side I have a big closet not to hide in but full of dress, skirts and tops, perk so I don't need a bra but will wear one anyway. All my hair back and long so I don't have to wear a wig any more.

[daviolin]

My wife and I both agree on cremation. Quick and dirty, not to mention cheap. If I go first, I instructed my wife to use my long accumulated wardrobe as the fuel to burn up my raggedy carcase. Daviolin

[kendra_gurl]

For everyone who says they will be dead so it doesn't matter or they could care less that may be true for you but not for your loved ones. There life continues and it will be a difficult time for them. My wife knows all about me but I would never want to place her in the position of having to request a funeral director to dress me in any feminine attire.
If I don't have the balls to come out to everyone while living then my balls don't deserve to be buried in silky panties after death.

[jenni_xx]

I'll be dead. It doesn't matter what I'm dressed in. I'll never know anyway.

Funerals/burials are not for the benefit of the dead. They're for the benefit of those who are left behind.

[KayleeTaylor]

For now, I will most likely be in my Class-A Military uniform for a memorial, after that, my body will go to science. I care more about what I will be leaving for my family. In my will, everything will go to my daughter and I have a living will in place in just in case.

[stephNE]

I don't really care how I'm dressed, but since only my wife knows, I am sure I will be buried in dude-mode.
I am much more concerned about it being quick. My father had Parkinson's for about two years and one grandmother had a very debilitating stroke and hung on for eight years. Both would be terrible ways to live.

[Roberta Young]

I will be buried in Male clothes, but My Wife promised to put a lipstick in My pocket before they close the casket. Hugs Roberta

[sandra-leigh]

If Death is when we meet the Final Truth, then I want my final truths reflected at my memorial service. After all I've struggled, it would be a big insult to my memory to pretend that I am male, or that I am a member of the denomination of my mother. I'd rather be remembered for being stubborn about sticking to my principles right to the end. Any insistence otherwise from my remaining family would indicate a great disrespect for me. :sad:

[julia marie]

Cremate me wearing whatever whatever. Naked if you want. Boy name on the death certificate. Already told my kids where the ashes go. As far as my "secret", can I get 30 minutes notice to dispose of the girlie clothes and accessories before the heart attack hits? No? Gotta figure that out.

[Barbara B]

Having been diagnosed with a terminal illness quite recently I have had a lot of time to think on the closing chater of my life! My wife knows and accepts this part of my life but I will leave as I entered as Brian. They are free to give any part of my body for the benefit of others, but I doubt they'll take it now, and as others have said my funeral is not for my benefit, but those I leave to mourn my passing. I do feel the need to put pen to paper though and document this part of my life for my children as I believe they will have questions for my wife which I am better able to answer, quite how I go about that I am still pondering.

[Alexis.j]

I don't care what happens to me when im dead, they can throw me ocean for all I care. Its what we do while still alive that matters...

[BillieJoEllen]

I seem to think about the end all of the time. I feel very guilty about what I'm going to leave my wife to deal with.

[Marcelle]

My wife and I have discussed this very topic as we were updating our wills and burial instructions we part and parcel. Both of us are going to be cremated with no viewing so in the end it doesn't really matter what I am wearing. I am a big fan of Star Trek so perhaps a Star Fleet uniform but one of the original Star Trek uniforms . . . oh the female one with short mini dress and boots (I do love my boots). :heehee:

Seriously, it doesn't matter to me and I leave it up to my wife or executor should my wife pre-decease me.

Hugs

Isha

[Allison Quinn]

I would prefer to be cremated.
Easier and cheaper and I can be set somewhere safe to be remembered by anyone who would want to :)

If I am to be buried I would just prefer unisex top and bottoms or a sheet

[kimmy p]

My wife and I have decided to be cremated. We have found urns that are biodegradable, and filled with your ashes, soil, and tree seeds. You are absorbed into the growing tree. To me it is a version of immortality, and better for the environment than burial. And I can be a tree that becomes really pretty in the fall. If I eventually fall or are cut down as a tree.... Well maybe someone will make me into a stripper pole then.....

[Desirae]

in a proper man suit. i want to remembered as the good father of my children and that goes with my masculine values. i am not very proud that i have this urge but i do.

I don't think what you wear is any kind of determining factor of whether you are a good father (parent). It only matters what you do. As far as masculine values, I don't think any type of clothing can affect any values whether they be feminine or masculine values. I'm not 100% sure what you mean by masculine values. If you mean, good provider, hard worker, protector, someone who is honest, fair, trustworthy, etc, I think those are good values for anyone to have. Clothing doesn't affect those. At least not in any way I know of.

If "masculine" values means being domineering, controlling, demeaning, having multiple sexual conquests, drinking hard and heavy, etc, then I don't want to preserve those anyway. I'm not saying this is what you mean. For some people, though, those are "masculine values."


For me, I'm still thinking about it. I'm not religious and I don't have any family. I won't have to consider either of those things. Whatever I do will be for me, even if I don't "realize" it after I'm dead. For what it's worth, I think I was born "wrong", or in the wrong body, but haven't, and won't do anything about it this late in life. I guess it really doesn't matter because the clothes isn't what makes me feel what I feel. I'm leaning more toward cremation, anyway, too. Hopefully, whatever I do decide, I'll get onto legal papers before I do go and whoever executes my will will carry through with my wishes.

[Ciara Brianne]

Since I want to be cremated, it would be a shame to incinerate a nice outfit.

Ciara

[Desirae]

I've thought about it quite a bit over the years. Although, I'm not 100% there yet, I think I would prefer being dressed in the gender in which, I believe, I should have been born. And that is a female. That's if I decide to be buried and not cremated, which I'm still contemplating, also. Whatever I end up deciding on, I will make sure its in my will and I can only hope that whoever executes my will will follow through with my wishes. I understand that it really doesn't (shouldn't) matter what we wear when we're dead, but I figure I should present myself in the way that makes me feel the most comfortable. Who knows, it could all change, too, by the time the end draws near. I was just curious if anyone else had given it any thought and I was very interested in your rational for whatever you decided (non decided). Thanks for all the great responses, You gave me some more to think about.

[KaTanya]

A while back, I made my preparations for cremation. Paid in full, just waiting for the "big day" to arrive, hopefully not too soon.