When enough is enough?

[simone1970]

When do you say enough is enough?
When I started CD'ing many years ago,it was purely the underwear,then since I came out to the wife a few years ago,I have now got a bigger female wardrobe than male!!
I have my toes painted and have removed most of my body hair.
Now I have just bought a pair of forms and a wig.(Both with the wife's knowledge).
I have no interest in becoming female full-time,but I am spending more time and money being female.
Has anybody had similar experiences?

[linda allen]

No. I determine what I spend and how far I go. I consider my wife's feelings while doing that.

If you can't control your desires or expenditures, you have a problem and should seek professional help.

[mykell]

not to your point yet but i spend more money on a pair of heels say then i would on a pair of men shoes ect, have more heels than male shoes, looking into makeup and better wig, maybe a makeover...i feel good this way !

[Valarie]

I am starting to get there, I borrow from my wives closet right now, which she is fine with. But in January when our school money comes in I know I will be spending more on female clothes than men's. I also have my eye on a nice wig. I usually have my toes painted too, my son has noticed, but since he is four he says it is beautiful. I was trying to keep a division between my male and female side, but that was causing problems with me. I think it is not to bad as long as we are respectful of our loved ones.

[audreyinalbany]

simmone, I think pretty much everybody here has had similar experiences. Many of us started experimenting with lingerie and gradually added female accouterments as time went by; quite a few of us tot he point where we dress and present occasionally (sometimes not so occasionally) as women in public. Everybody is on their own path and on'y you'll know when you've reached your comfort level. But be forewarned: your comfort level is fluid…they keep moving the goalposts as it were…there was a time I would never have considered leaving the house en femme and while I won't say it's become routine, it's certainly something I'm much more comfortable with now than I used to be.

[sweetshauna]

ya I have more panties than mens undies. Wife bought my first pair years ago. as far as to when enuff is enuff, that depends on ur end goal I think. I hope to have a larger fem wardrobe, than male. But then being fem, even part time, requires more. IMO

[Lynn Marie]

Sure sounds like a perfectly normal progression to me. Looks like a little makeup is next! Then finger nails, and some nice jewelry and belts and scarves and gloves. Oh my! It also sounds like you are progressing slowly, which is just great. Out of control spending is definitely not good.

[NicoleScott]

Simone, excessive spending isn't a CDing problem. It's a discipline problem, so address it that way.
As for the increasing desire, it doesn't have to be a problem, it may be that you are doing what, for you, increases the pleasure, comfort, or attainment of a goal.
When my age was still in single digits, I dabbled in CDing with lipstick, and into my pre-teen and teen years, with my sister's high heels and started acquiring my own things. I thought I had put it all together in my early twenties by transforming "completely", that is, head-to-toe with skirt and top, pantyhose, high heels, wig, and makeup. Throughout the next couple of decades, I added more elements that I felt were necessary: not just more clothes, shoes, and wigs, but new things like shapewear, fake nails, fake eyelashes, jewelery, and perfume. And in the most recent years, specialty outfits like a maid's uniform, Japanese schoolgirl sailor uniform, and a cheongsam. It didn't happen in one budget-busting fell swoop, but over the years as finances allowed.

[Beverley Sims]

It happens to most of us that way.
All I say as a word of warning advance slowly so as your wife does not become overwhelmed.
If she shows objection to somethimg just back off fot a while.
Show a little consideration for her feelings.

[kendra_gurl]

No. I determine what I spend and how far I go. I consider my wife's feelings while doing that.

If you can't control your desires or expenditures, you have a problem and should seek professional help.

I would not consider just now purchasing forms and a wig after coming out to her wife a "few" years ago as not being able to control her desires or expenditures.

simone: your male self can get by with one pair of dress shoes and a pair of sneakers. A cpl or three pair of jeans and some shirts and most of us are good for a week. Most men don't really mind seeing themselves in very similar attire every day and while most of us can't dress en-fem everyday we do enjoy trying different looks.

Think of it the same as with any sport or hobby. At first there is some expense to buy all the equipment you will need to " excel" (haha) in your endeavor. After you have the necessary items then you slow down buying while learning how to use and enjoy what you have.

You may find your next expense will be on lessons from a professional makeup artist rather than the professional help linda is suggesting :battingeyelashes:

[gennee]

I only buy what I need. If I don't need it I give them to charity.


:)

[Wezzcott]

It all started for me the same way. I started with underwear, then pantyhose, then added a full slip, then came the heels, and so on. Now I find myself spending a lot of time looking at new clothing and wanting to buy it. I have to ask myself, "Do I really need that?". Sometimes I buy something I just have to have,and find myself only wearing it once or twice, and then not wearing it. To me buying and shopping are almost as fun as dressing itself. Right now I am on a vintage slip frenzy. I sometimes find myself thinking, don't I have enough already? Then I will usually donate some clothing and then go buy more...lol. Right now I would love to buy more, but am holding off until after Christmas when I won't feel guilty about spending money on myself. So for me, it's a pretty normal cycle, but I do sometimes feel like I am spending a little too much, but I think its a pretty normal feeling.

[Laura28]

Simone, your post sounds like i wrote it lol. in the past couple years i have desrired to dress much more then ever in the past, i now shave my entire body and am doing laser. My toe nails have been painted for almost 6 months none stop. I think your progessen is normal, i think as we get older we become more excepoting as to this part of our life and start to enjoy. My wife encourges me and not having to hide it also makes it so much better. This forum has also helpd me to embrace my crossdressing and makes me want to be a better woman when dressed.

[wilt575]

When do you say enough is enough?
When I started CD'ing many years ago,it was purely the underwear,then since I came out to the wife a few years ago,I have now got a bigger female wardrobe than male!!
I have my toes painted and have removed most of my body hair.
Now I have just bought a pair of forms and a wig.(Both with the wife's knowledge).
I have no interest in becoming female full-time,but I am spending more time and money being female.
Has anybody had similar experiences? Thats the 64 million dollar question. Maybe there is never enough. My sister started dressing me when I was five or six after she married and moved out I stopped for a few years. In my mid teens started with underwear, and like you progressed from there. Wife knew, accepted and enjoyed going out with me dressed. I have a small male wardrobe only what is necessary. we have a large combined female wardrobe we call our clothes. We were discussing my getting forms, when I kiddingly mentioned maybe implants. Her reaction was a surprisingly why not, so today possess nice "c" boobies.

[gillathome]

To me buying and shopping are almost as fun as dressing itself.
it's often easier to go shopping than to dress as well. I decided to just consider the expense as a hobby and it seems quite reasonable like that

[Gillian Gigs]

Yea, I agree, it seems to be a progression, but towards what end? I have added more and more articles of feminine apparel to my dressing up over the years. Is it because I now need more of items to get the same feelings that one feminine article brought me in the very beginning? Are we, or am I falling for the more is better mentality that really doesn't work.

[JennyLynn]

Just my thinking. I find that my man side is totally fulfilling. My femme side is a part that needs to express itself .....at times. I would think, and please don't everybody pile on, that if you find yourself wanting to express yourself as more your femme side, then that should be a conversation you should have with your wife. I find a nice balance between my man side and my woman side, but it may be that you have a proclivity towards being a woman fulltime, which might be something you need to explore with the help of others, your wife first and foremost. Have you had any changes in your life lately that have led you to leaning towards your feminine side? It might be temporary due to outside influences. Either way, I wouldn't get too worried. Take your time and figure out what you want the end result to be. And always discuss with your wife.
Jenny

[Majella St Gerard]

That sounds just like me, I could have written that post myself. It's a little addictive ain't it?

[simone1970]

Thanks for making me feel pretty normal.And I think the only "professional" help I need is with my make up.I'm English,we don't do therapy.:):)

[suchacutie]

Simone, I enjoy being a guy. Having said that, at 55 we suddenly found Tina and the perception changed. We really knew nothing about transgenderism so everything was fresh and new. We discuss every idea and issue that arises and Tina has become a part of us. That meant that Tina's presence was ever expanding, and probably still is. If anythin, my male self is now more defined. Just keep the lines of communication open and it will all sort out. The balance point may be new but it will balance when everything stops being new.

[Nadine Spirit]

Once I finally allowed myself to go with my cross dressing it took some time for me to develop a nice female wardrobe. Especially once I decided I needed to get out of the house. So for many years I have spent much more money on my female wardrobe than my male one. But now that I have a nice female wardrobe things have sort of leveled off. But I do find that I need more clothes as a female than a male. My female clothes tend to be more situation specific whereas my male clothes tend to be appropriate for a variety of occasions. Also I don't wear wigs or makeup as a guy, so there is obviously less cost there.