Stop and smell the roses.

[I Am Paula]

I'm seeing a huge increase of posts by and about unhappy transsexuals. Even posts about unrelated things turn into bitching and moaning. It may well be the season, we're thinking about the holidays, some of us as newly minted women, some with lost loves or families. But it's still bitching and moaning.

I could not stand being a guy. I'm transsexual and love that I have shed that ugly persona. I celebrate every moment of transition, know that I am nearing a goal. I became what I am voluntarily, and am TS to get better. Why would someone transition to get miserable? Look at your life now as a transwoman, is this not a place you wanted to be? Some of us may still be struggling with some facial hair, or an imperfect figure, but we should all be glad we are taking steps to right a wrong brought on us on a cosmic scale.

Not every second of my life is skipping through wild flowers in paradise. Neither is living as cis gendered. Some will say we had no choice, but ultimately no one forced us. We are TS. We probably aren't going back. Why not stop and smell the flowers, enjoy the journey for a bit, and push aside some of the negativity that is so stifling?

[Ann Louise]

No sh*t from me honey. We're on the same wavelength. I just posted something kind of similar in the "Rage" thread, but ditched the Nam era pot helmet a while back. Have to take this incoming on my own. Love you hun, Ann

[Amy A]

I started a thread recently about having a tough time of it. I did so because this is a support forum, and I needed support from people who understand what I'm going through.

Many members are going through major life changes, and so there's bound to be some less than joyful posts. But 'cheer up and try and enjoy it' isn't really going to help much.

[stefan37]

Aside from the demise of my marriage(which is huge and pains me deeply) transition has been overall a very positive experience which has allowed me to divert all the negative energy I had from suppression to positive energy I can expend in my health, personal life and business.

[mary something]

Stefanie you need to bottle and sell the fuel that you are running on because it is some good stuff. This is just based upon my experiences with your posts but I'm happy to see you taking such good care of yourself!

Amy I agree it is a support forum and that is exactly what it is useful for! There is nowhere else we can vent feelings safely without possibly hurting loved ones or ourselves.

[arbon]

I talk a lot of about the issues around gender here and transitioning, things I'm not really able to talk about elsewhere.
Its a lot better then me posting it on FB! lol

But its only a part of my life, there is so much more and mostly its good.

[mary something]

me too, I don't talk the trans to anyone else EVER but here. Sorry if occasionally I get a little messy. I really think it's best like this and I agree with you arbon!

[Emma Beth]

Paula, I agree with you 100%.

In this holiday season people really need to take a look around them and appreciate what they have, enjoy the magic of the season , and drink in the hope that's supposed to be there.

All I see around me in the world where I live are people that are stressed over getting that one gift, people that seem to be looking at the bad, and people living in that funk rut.

I am surprised all the time at what I see and how much people ignore the positive. An example would be I started a thread on the first expressing my thanks for all of my Sisters here and a hope for the season and asked the question of what gift would make a difference in this holiday season. The thread had 178 views and only one response, thank you for your response by the way Paula. I was a bit taken aback that more people would rather focus on the negative and seem to blind themselves of the positive.

I think people need to take a few moments everyday and smell those roses.

[Kimberly Kael]

Many members are going through major life changes, and so there's bound to be some less than joyful posts. But 'cheer up and try and enjoy it' isn't really going to help much.

Railing about the injustice of it all and focusing on aspects that aren't under your control doesn't help much, either. There's a balance to be struck where you always find the silver lining even as you acknowledge the challenges you face. I know I'm an eternal optimist, it's very much a cultivated part of my nature. It means that I see the opportunities and don't dwell overlong on the setbacks. This approach has served me very well in life.

[I Am Paula]

Thanks for the replies.
I have used these pages to rant, rave, bitch and moan, and ask questions on some really depressing, and sad subjects, and have received lots of support from my sisters here.
The very nature of the forum is to allow that, and let our sisters chime in if they wish.
The purpose of my OT was twofold:

Help some girls who are a bit down to stop, and think positively, maybe just for a few moments each day. It does wonders. Dwelling on the difficult bits, specially the ones we have no control over, is a vicious circle.

The other was the thread hijacking, which is RARELY positive. Some positive posts have been ruined by anger. Some even seem to be of 'Just because I can' variety.

I've seen a lot of 'I'm trans, I have a right to be angry/unhappy' in my life. Sure, it's your right, but is it right?

[Marleena]

Cheering up is always welcome in such a serious section of the board.:) Many of us are still struggling.

Buttons are pushed to purposely high jack and get threads locked, you can see the pattern. Some are so obvious but oh well what can you do?

[I Am Paula]

Marleena- Is your avatar upside down, or have you moved to Australia?

[Marleena]

I'm defying gravity Paula.:) I don't fit in anywhere and a post will be coming about it.

[mary something]

that would be even funnier Marleena if you painted your legs green
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3g4ekwTd6Ig

Would also help my ability to stop and smell the roses :)

[Marleena]

Lol @ Mary. Good one! :)