Came out as transgender today. This is me from now on

[Allison_Leslie]

I am moving from CD to TRANSGENDER and living the life of a woman,
I have came out to my family today just have not heard anything back
yet.

I also came out to my boss outside of work, and she's going to help me
all the way through this and supports me totally.

I have changed to only using Alvina Boyett on Facebook and @alvina_boyett on twitter as well. and have referred everyone to either get on board or don't judge.

I had an epiphany this morning and I decided to follow what feels most natural. I will only be in Guy mode at work from here on out or in fast emergencies where I have to dart out and do not have time to dress appopriately.

For THAT I am working on very casual female attire that I CAN slip on easily so soon even emergencies will be met by my true self, Alvina.

This is the hardest decision I have ever had to make in my life.

But I made it and I'm sticking with it.

[Courtney Ramona]

best wishes and good luck to you.

[Allison_Leslie]

thanks so much sweety!

[DebbieL]

FREE AT LAST, thank Got Almighty, FREE AT LAST!
I know how much courage this took, and how stressful it can be, but your courage will pay off in the long run.
I know that you will be much happier when you can be your TRUE SELF!

Transgender or Transsexual?
Hope we will see you in the transsexual group as well!

[Candice Mae]

Good luck on your journey.

But FYI, transgender includes crossdressers as its a blanket term. The word you are looking for is transsexual.

[Shar]

Congratulations. Enjoy every minute of your femininity.It's a blessing.

[LelaK]

Whether or not you mean to be transitioning via surgery, hormone therapy etc or just not dressing or identifying as a guy any more, I and surely we congratulate and support your brave decision.

[oliviall]

Congratulations Alvina! Kudos for talking to the boss...this is one of those fail to plan - plan to fail sorts of things :)

[PaulaQ]

I will only be in Guy mode at work from here on out or in fast emergencies where I have to dart out and do not have time to dress appopriately.


Do you ever plan to present as a woman at work? Just wondering why "everywhere but work" if your boss is accepting? In any case, congratulations, and best of luck! :)

Oh, hey, one other question - do you still identify as male, or do you identify as female now? I ask because in another recent thread, you said you identified as male. And it's fine if you've done some soul-searching and changed your mind. I can relate! Just curious where you are on your identity, as opposed to your presentation.

[emma-louise]

Good luck hope it all works out for you xx

[Allison_Leslie]

FREE AT LAST, thank Got Almighty, FREE AT LAST!
I know how much courage this took, and how stressful it can be, but your courage will pay off in the long run.
I know that you will be much happier when you can be your TRUE SELF!

Transgender or Transsexual?
Hope we will see you in the transsexual group as well!

I am not going for the Op, So I guess it's is simply transgender for me as I have to deal with my job being first
unless I can find an at-home career that will supply what I need. I appreciate the encouragement!


Good luck on your journey.

But FYI, transgender includes crossdressers as its a blanket term. The word you are looking for is transsexual.

I am not an expert on the terms, what I am is someone who has decided to cross-dress as a living and not a hobby and only present male
when at work, when I have to. A non-op deal. If that is Transexual then yes, I thought that term applied to the post-ops or op-willing/future.


Do you ever plan to present as a woman at work? Just wondering why "everywhere but work" if your boss is accepting? In any case, congratulations, and best of luck! :)

Oh, hey, one other question - do you still identify as male, or do you identify as female now? I ask because in another recent thread, you said you identified as male. And it's fine if you've done some soul-searching and changed your mind. I can relate! Just curious where you are on your identity, as opposed to your presentation.

I identify AS female from here on out. Work is different and cannot be obfuscated as it is my livelyhood. My boss IS VERY undertanding and outside of work we even shop together and she's done my makeup (profile pic is her work). So my job is in no danger, I simply will only present male when working.

Thanks for your kindness and support!


Good luck hope it all works out for you xx

thanks so very much, hon!

[Beverley Sims]

Alvina,
All the best for a smooth transition.

[Katy120]

I've been thinking about your news on and off since it I read it yesterday evening. It is such a big step. You must have tremendous reserves of courage and determination. I hope you keep us informed about your journey. All the best.

[Allison_Leslie]

Thank you all so very much and I will keep you all abreast of what is going on. I have not yet heard back from the family email I sent out, so I'm kind of nervous about it and then at the same time... THIS IS WHAT I HAVE TO DO.

I was raised to only fear that which is worth fearing.
What people think does not fall into that catagory.
I am not without care or empathy at all in fact I have that in spades, but in order to be Alvina who does care so much,
I need to NOT care what the haters think and just SHOW the world by example that I am worth the bother and that I have something
valuable to offer this world.

I don't view it as courage so much as having been through a TON of church-related BS in my life that I am just FED UP and I had to release it all
to God. God wasn't in those churches to begin with anyhow.

I will be back on here soon, I just gotta sleep now.

You all have a great day and I'll see you all when I wake up!

[Marcelle]

Hello Alvina,

I wish you luck with your journey.

Hugs

Isha

[Phylis Nicole Schuyler]

May your journey be smooth and not be filled with too many potholes. As long as you are the same person inside, that's all that should matter. Too bad not everyone thinks like that. You are one of the most courageous persons I know. If anything ever happened to Carol, and since I'm genetically XXY, I would also present full time as a female. God bless you.

[Sabrina133]

Hi Alvina,

congratulations on your decision - i know its not an easy one but, in the long run, you will be much happier. I hope you realize that the road on which you are embarking can be full of trials, tribulations, and challenges. Regardless, hugs and farewell.

[asiants]

Congratulation Alvina, I admire your courage, I wish my family and my work situation can allow me to do the same..

[AngelaKelly<3]

Congratulations! :bg: Such amazing courage!

I'm still trying to figure out how to define little-old-me at the moment, but TG is definitely a possibility.

Good luck with everything that comes after, and I'm sure you'll have a BLAST being the real you :winkp:

[PaulaQ]

Alvina, I like, and a lot of us use, the term "trans". Also, although many girls here will disagree with me, I know many trans women who opt for no surgical procedures, or opt for FFS (facial feminization surgery) instead of SRS. I know many happy non-op women.

There are women who don't opt for HRT, although I don't personally know any. Most of us who transition feel the need to be hormonally congruent. The emotional benefit was for me quite profound, life changing, and life saving.

So given your feelings, i'd recommend you talk with a gender therapist, and start work to see if HRT is right for you.

The reason I asked about working in boy mode is I'm trying to understand what you do that couldn't be done as a woman. I am pushing on this some, because you may find, as many of us experience, that after a time switching between boy mode / girlmode is profoundly uncomfortable. I have a friend who borders on emotional collapse because of this - it is tearing her apart.

Please take all this unasked for advice as just humble suggestions based on my own experiences, and please feel free to pm me if you have questions or I can help in any way.

[Allison_Leslie]

I am very happy you asked that, PaulaQ. My Boss is great, but the COMPANY doesn't deal with this so well that I am aware of.
My supervisor over my store boss was just brought in the loop by my boss, and He says I look better as a woman! So the acceptance is there
of the people IN the company, I just have to research the actual company more.

I do not want to be given the go-ahead to be Alvina at work and then have them fire me for a set-up on some other grounds "unrelated" which
is the logical way companies get rid of weird people they do not understand... The only thing is I am the highest-paid hourly next to only one other
and I have perfect attendance and am 100 percent dependable. They really don't WANT to get rid of me. I am not saying this to toot my own,
I'm am just stating it as fact and for leverage in the even they try something one day, should I present female at work.

I have always loved the idea of changing and role-reversal and have played changlings and shape-shifters in RPG games all my life,
I am a HUGE TransFormers fan and I enjoy ANY story about shape-shifting and the art of disguise.

I REALLY get high off of changing and stunning everyone .. I feel sorry that anyone should ever suffer due to going back
and forth. That saddens me, but not everyone is the same. Just saying I enjoy that aspect a lot for it to do me harm, but I TAKE your word and I do heed it and
keep it filed away for later :)

[Kaitlyn Michele]

Please take good care of yourself.
You need support and you need information about what its really like to do this.

You need to understand what is possible, what is realistically possible and what is impossible..

It is a disservice to you to not tell you that is a horrible idea. If you are serious and you want your life to go well too, take a huge step back...find a support group or a therapist and get smart about what you are doing..

the scariest moment for you will be after a couple days or weeks when the high of stunning everybody doesn't turn you on anymore and you've told everybody in your life including your boss..

I truly wish you the best

[PaulaQ]

Although my personal experience with coming out has been great, I do have to echo what Kaitlyn says - I've known other girls who've paid a bad price for coming out too quickly. You have to understand that you are rolling the dice with your life. Now you may win most of those throws, but you may not too. Just keep it in mind Alvina, and be careful.

[Devin C]

Best wishes. It's a wonderful journey.

[Christina Kay]

Best wishes on your journey :) Hugs

[Allison_Leslie]

I mispoke I feel.. I didn't mean to make it seem like stunning people was what it was about.. I hope I did not convey that. I was just trying to convey that I don't mind having to change at times and it actually is fun for ME. I am a very weird individual and I've been very put upon and bullied as a child a LOT... NOW as an adult I enjoy laughing in the faces of my advisaries because I try to show them that not everyone is going to come back at them and be upset and mad and hurt when they act like unaccepting idiots.. I'm going to laugh directly at them. I was born with NO fear of the absurd, no fear of that which is against me in life. Why? Because my mother, whom I lost at the age of 16 to pancreatic cancer, always taught me that when somebody is hurtful to you , laugh AT them and carry on smiling.. it DRIVES THEM INSANE. They want a reaction, but they do not expect THAT one... If I chose to go the op route or even just Facial or hormone treatment.. I'm going to do it for ME and nobody else.

The bullying stopped the day my mother told me about laughing back at them. It scared the ____ out of those kids that I laughed MANIACALLY at them that next day they tried to push me around. I was DETERMINED and I got that message across very clearly. I'm glad they thought I lost my mind. They didn't mess with me any further.

I AM CRAZY.