Advantages of an older CDer

[Laura912]

A recent response to another thread led to wondering are there advantages to being among the elder CDers? Things like: skin is looser so cleavage is easier; some gynecomastia occurs with aging; more funds to spend on clothes; retired so more time to dress; have learned dress and shoe sizes by now; SO knows and accepts; accepted that this is not going away. Any others?

[Christina Kay]

You have covered most of them Laura :) Especially the SO part. Also you reach an age where you are more accepting of yourself...Hugs

[linda allen]

Young crossdressers can look forward to getting to be old crossdressers. Old crossdressers cannot look forward to being young crossdressers.

[RADER]

Yes, I agree with both of you; My wife was OK with my dressing, even picking
out outfits in the catalog for me to get.
At lease their is one positive perk to getting old.
Rader

[Kate Simmons]

Only one I can think of. I'm older so I don't give a hoot.:battingeyelashes::)

[alwayshave]

I agree with Kate Simmons, the older I get the less I care what people think.

[Leslie Langford]

- Don't forget to add that gray beard hair is also far easier to cover up with make up and a good foundation, as that dreaded "blue shadow" is now no longer an issue.

- As men's testosterone levels and women's estrogen levels begin to decline with age, they start to look more and more like each other - especially when it comes to facial features.

- It's a sad reflection on today's society, but alas! - also true: older women tend to become invisible when out in public as they attract far fewer admiring glances than their younger sisters. The good news is that this also enhances the ability of older CDers to either "pass" or "blend in" with very few problems and thus fly under the radar.

That said, one thing I've found is that SA's are particularly enthusiastic about serving older female customers as they are often perceived as having a well-developed fashion sense. They are also seen as knowing from experience what looks good on them and what doesn't, are more susceptible to flattering comments regarding what they happen to be trying on, and best of all from an SA's standpoint - often have far more disposable income than their Gen X, Y, and Millennial counterparts. They are therefore far more apt to part with their money if they see an outfit that speaks to them.

[Julie Gaum]

One thing that could be considered a pro or con: If planning to go out from time to time, tight fitting clothes --- jeans, skirts or dresses --- are out of place.
Since I don't have a feminine figure that's fine with me. Doesn't mean that they can't be slightly form fitting, just not tight. Also, the need for tucking isn't required.
One more: When you do go out and OBVIOUSLY are in late 60s or more --- onlookers seldom give that person a second glance and the kids don't see a possible object for derision. Just thunk ( MY word) of another: Old women tend to start looking like men --- making it a lot easier to emulate.
Julie

[suchacutie]

First..let me say that very young transgendered has serious advantages of skin tone etc. along with a much more accepting set of peers.

Having said that, women who are 60+, even those incredibly well dressed and attractive garner much less notice. Add to that the coalescing of features of the genders at advanced age and passing can become remarkably easier. Let me be direct...it's not necessarily that we pass better but the distinction between genders narrows. No one is willing to guess wrong so we are better taken at face value.

Works for me!

[Julie Gaum]

Leslie, either you were reading over my shoulder while i was typing OR I was I was looking over yours.
Julie

[Eryn]

...older women tend to become invisible when out in public as they attract far fewer admiring glances than their younger sisters. The good news is that this also enhances the ability of older CDers to either "pass" or "blend in" with very few problems and thus fly under the radar....

This was the one I was about to state, and I'm not convinced that even older GGs are unhappy about losing the level of attention that younger GGs either enjoy or endure. I'm tall and have a slim figure so I get initial looks from younger men but then the attention goes away as soon as they see my face and determine that I'm not potential bedroom material. Frankly, I don't quite know how I would handle it if I was hit upon! :)

[Stephanie Julianna]

Another advantage is that some of us have a bit more flesh on the chest. With the right corselette I can push up enough to fill my 38B bra very nicely. I'm a size 14 dress so this is well proportioned for my 5'5" frame.

[Ineke Vashon]

I'm not potential bedroom material. :)

Eryn, I think you hit the nail on the head. We pass, we're not 'evaluated' and we don't even have to show our Golden Age card :D

Ineke

[franlee]

For me it as simple as being around to remember the "Good Old Days" and still being able to add a little to those wonderful memories and adventures. Like I always say it's worth something just being around to b!t*h!

[kimdl93]

Physically, I'd miss the youthful skin, lean body mass and boundless energy of youth. But I'm grateful to have grown past the self doubt, self loathing, guilt, shame and fear that seems to accompany youth for transgendered people.

[skirtsuit]

I dunno - have you ever tried to spread eyeliner on 50 yo guy eyelids? It's like painting painting concrete!
On the plus side, I've really come to love middle-aged women's looks and have no trouble not being noticed by most men when out & about. Most men, except pervs like myself, do not really seem to even look once at modestly dressed older women, or women-like men.

Best,
SS

[Madilyn A.]

I have more dresses, hosiery, lingerie, shoes, wigs and makeup than I did years ago on the plus side. Not sure they out-weigh the additional wrinkles and extra pounds that age has brought my way.

[LaraPeterson]

Hey SS, I try to do it most every day--and boy, it IS hard. But, with years of practice, lots of potions and plenty of foundation, the crags and crevices can still be filled almost level. That challenge is worth the face looking back in the mirror if it goes well that day. Time is not on our side, but I for one intend to enjoy as many of them as I can until I can no longer hold the mascara steady enough to put it on. And as for those short, tight skirts, I still like them--a lot. Yeah, I'm a floozy.

[Maryesther M.]

I'm afraid I see no advantages whatsoever. In my 70s I am happy to report that the 'buzz' associated with CD-ing remains strong. I enjoy planning my next session, ordering/buying items for it, photographing myself in a variety of locations and 'poses' & editing the results.

All this has of course only been made possible since the advent of the digital age. I remember all too well the difficulties with photography when one had to send films away to be developed and printed!! And incidentally, lots of male-sized femme items, wigs &c. were only available on mail order catalogues.

One advantage remains: Being able to take 25 years off one's appearance with a bit of make-up and donning a 'crowning glory'.....a nice femme wig. The down side is trying to remember to remove all traces of CD activity before prying eyes return!!

M.

[Krystenw]

Yep, what they said.

[AllieSF]

With advanced age comes advanced experiences both good and bad, learning more form the bad experiences. As said above, being older was care less what others thinks because we finally realized that their opinions are usually useless even though think otherwise. We are more pragmatic, generally have more confidence and tend to know which priorities are real ones and which ones can be ignored. We also can see that the light at the end of life's long tunnel which also means that we are getting closer to the end of that damned tunnel.

Like some famous singer used to sing, "Don't worry, be happy". Oh, how true is that because how we feel depends on ourselves and not someone else.

[Kate's at home]

How about all of the above...plus, knowing full well that life is short and the clock is ticking? We need to do, be, and experience what we can while we can.

Kate

[Beverley Sims]

Older CDer's dont have the advantage of a slim body, smooooth! facial features, nice unblemished hands, shapely legs, need I go on? :)

[audreyinalbany]

it also seems as though with advancing age, the sexes seem to become somewhat more androgynous; by the time you hit your eighties it's sometimes hard to tell the girls from the boys; skin gets old and saggy, fat accumulates, breasts sag in women and get bigger in men. we seem to approach a sort of gender homeostasis….

[skirtsuit]

Older CDer's dont have the advantage of a slim body

Wha?? Speak for yourself, please!
Just a smidge over 10 stone (and size 8-10 US!) and been that way for over a decade since I quit drinking and got off the couch.

Regards, SS

[Jackie7]

Another advantage some of us older girls have: we've survived our divorce from the bewildered first wife, and have had the time and luck to find a copacetic partner. That is everything to me, a partner who not only accepts, but enables. Frees dual me to explore and evolve without having to hide and defend.

But what's that you say Skirtsuit, to be youthfully slim we have to get off the couch and quit drinking? Egad, who knew? I don't think I am ready.

[Sheila11]

My older eyes can't see the wrinkles and think I'm kind of hot when I look in the mirror.

[looking_good]

Amen and amen! I just wish there were a lens on my camera that was kinder. Are there old lenses?

[Lena]

I can relate to many of the comments. Eyes are good and bad. I take glasses off to put on makeup but can't see well enough do it neatly. But with bad eyes, I still look awesome the mirror.

[AKADonna]

Also, I found that as I hit my 60's, I guess my testosterone started to diminish and my body has become less hairy. I only have to shave my chest and underarms, etc about every 3-4 months to keep things looking more feminine. Applying moisturizer to my face, neck shoulders and arms has really made my skin feel soooo much softer and femme, too.

[Lynn Marie]

So I'm retired now. I no longer represent an employer, I'm financially secure, no longer attached to someone I don't particularly like, and an 800 square foot apartment with a garage suits me perfectly. I answer to no one, have pretty good taste in clothes, and know how to look good in both boy and girl modes. I have fun hobbies, cool cars, and a bunch of CD girlfriends. Oh yeah, and apart from "turkey neck" and an extra chin when looking down, I'm pretty fortunate to still be looking good for my age! I may only have another 10 to 20 years left, but they're the best years of my life.

[Jonithan]

I think for me at least, my kids will be older and out of our house! They are still under high school age and only know daddy as daddy. I don't want to freak them out with high school and therapy all at the same time...

Joni

[Talisker]

Not that i want to be aby older but i think some of the advantages are that you may be more financially secure, even retired, so you dont have to worry about your employer finding out. Also that you get less attention from young males who tend to be more aggressive. Differences between sexes seem most extreme at prime breeding age so your further away from that.

[JamieQ]

I agree with Kate Simmons, the older I get the less I care what people think.

Exactly! Fortunately for me I have pretty much always been that way!:)

[Raychel]

I also agree with Kate, The older I get the more comfortable I am with who I am
and the less I care what people think.

[Claire Cook]

It's great that Laura started this thread-- we've had several that bemoaned getting older. Lots of positives here. I've experienced some of what you all have said, especially about the reactions to an older lady, or at least someone who presents as one.

I'll add this -- thinning hair makes it easier to wear a wig. And oh yes senior discounts!

[AKADonna]

Yeah, my first 20 or so years a a CDer, I tried to flaunt myself. Big boobs, eyelashes, whatever. Now that I have matured (70), I am perfectly happy being within myself with nice, softer looking bustline, age appropriate makeup and clothes and I am happy to be a mature woman! I am loving it more every day!

[CarlaWestin]

I certainly agree with everyone here and the general consensus seems to be that age is advantageous to crossdressing. I might add that generally at our age we've already raised the children, figured out money, planned the retirement and the husband/wife partnership is pretty well set. Life's little hiccups just aren't the crisis' that they used to be.

Also, all the feminine accoutrements and embellishments tend to make us appear 10, 20 or even 30 years younger. Just check my profile, I'm pushing 60.

And afterwards, we're just that grumpy old fart.

[Karren H]

Two negatives don't make a positive! Being old sucks and being a Crossdresser is a close second place! lol. So how you can extrapolate and kind of real advantage is beyond.... ok maybe old people don't give a rats ass so they could care less what others think of their crossdressing... personally id trade all the "advantages" to be either young or not crossdressing... or both.... "I can't wait to get old to be a better crossdressers" said no one ever! :D

[CarlaWestin]

See, grumpy old fart!

[Danielle/Mo]

I would gladly trade all of the perceived advantages of being older to be in high school or even in my 20's right now. My life would have been way different in today's society, which is FAR more accepting. I feel that I lost the years when I probably could have looked my best. I am very depressed that I don't have a lot of good years left before it gets very difficult to pull off an acceptable look.

[Karren H]

See, grumpy old fart!

Who's old? I was talking about all the other old bats here! lol

[NicoleScott]

Gee, I don't know. Ask me in a few years. hahahaha

[Raychel]

I have worked a lot of years to become that grumpy old fart. ask anyone around, they will tell you
I am that person. :sad:

[Ginger Jameson]

Definitely have to agree with the income part. I never appreciated how expensive it was to be a woman, and it's not a 24/7 thing for me. I don't know how younger people do it.

[JulianneXD]

I'd love to be young and able to transition as a teen. Before all that facial and body hair. To develop into a shapely woman. Too late for me now.

[susie evans]

karren

we aren't old just mature girls LOL

Susie

[Alice B]

A hard question for me to answer since I did not start until in my 60's, thus already fit the older profile. I would say that I care less about what others think, can afford things more and have greater freedom to do things. Also, being later in life I have an established relationship with my wife, thus acceptance from her was easier. The hard part is self acceptance that I'm not going to look like a younger woman or like the models I see. But, if I accept myself and stay within what I have to work with (lol) I'm OK.

[Stephanie47]

The advantage of being more mature or elderly is the various discounts at stores. Also, not having to account to any boss. Not having to conform to any schedule. I have ample time to be en femme, but, then again, I have ample time to just plain roam around and do my thing.

And, I'm like Karen. Life still would be easier not being a cross dresser.

[Milou]

I'm young, but I can imagine experience is one of the advantages. Maybe self acceptance and reaching a point where you don't care what others think of you. However, this depends on the person, I guess

[Vickie_CDTV]

Older CDer's dont have the advantage of a slim body, smooooth! facial features, nice unblemished hands, shapely legs, need I go on? :)

Not all young people (trans or not) are thin, and there are many large GGs.